Authors note

It's only a few days till Christmas so I decided to write a story about it! I hope it turns out the way I want it to.

In this fic, Bell is four years older than Clarke, bc anything more wouldn't have made sense.

I hope you enjoy it and merry Christmas! You could make my day by leaving a review!

I don't own anything.

Christmas 2006

(Clarke is 11, Bellamy 15)

Clarke tried to push back her tears as she begged her mother.

"Mom, I don't want to spend Christmas with the Blake's. I want to spend it with you. Please, mom, I don't know them!"

Abby softly stroked her hair and smiled apologetically.

"I'm so sorry, honey, but mommy has to save a few lives tonight. And I'm sure you'll get along with them, Octavia is just your age, and Aurora is a wonderful woman. Tomorrow, I promise, I'll pick you up and we make ourselves a wonderful day together. Just the two of us."

The little girl hugged her mom before Abby rung the Blake's door.

Clarke really wanted to grab her mother's hand, but decided that at the age of 11 she was too old for that.

Abby and Clarke were going to spend their first Christmas together since her father's death, but Abby had been emergency called. No holidays for doctor Griffin. So she called her friend Aurora, who was a nurse at the hospital, and fortunately she didn't mind letting Clarke spend Christmas with their family.

But Clarke minded. She knew her mother didn't really have a choice, but she felt like she was always second after her mother's patients. And it sucked.

Besides, she didn't know Aurora or her children. She knew her mother had called her instead of other friends because she had a daughter her age and thought Clarke could make friends, but Clarke doubted it.

The door opened. A tall woman with long dark hair, hazel eyes and a friendly face smiled brightly at Clarke.

"You're Clarke! I'm Aurora." She shook Clarke's hand which made her feel really grown. Then she hugged her mother.

"Hi, Abby."

"Aurora. I'm so thankful that you can take care of Clarke and I'm really sorry that it's on such a short note."

Aurora just waved her hand, assuring Abby that it was no problem at all.

"I'm sure she and O will get along" she said.

After talking for another few minutes, Abby had to leave. She tried to give Clarke a kiss on the forehead, but the girl pulled away. Her mother smiled sadly, wished them all a merry Christmas and then disappeared.

"I'll show you the guest room and you can drop your bag there, okay?" Aurora asked, and Clarke agreed. She followed her to a small but nice and neat room where she dropped her bag on the bed.

The woman showed her the bathroom and told her to feel at home.

"So, Clarke, you want to meet Octavia and Bellamy?" Aurora asked, still smiling.

Clarke just nodded. She felt really uncomfortable. All she really wanted was to be home, spending Christmas Eve with her family.

Her heart ached at the thought that she would spend Christmas not only without her mom, but also without her dad. They had been really close and she still had to hold back the tears at the thought of him.

Clarke couldn't even imagine a Christmas without her dad, and now she was going to be all on her own? She felt anger at her mom creeping up in her, and still had a furious expression when Aurora opened the door to the living room.

But the little girl running up to her didn't seem to notice. She was apparently really excited.

She had long dark hair like her mother and her eyes, too. Before Clarke knew what was happening the girl pulled her into a tight hug.

"You must be Clarke! I'm Octavia! It's so cool that you're here!" She grinned brightly at Clarke.

"This Christmas is going to be so much fun! Come on, we can bake some cookies together! Or make a snowball fight! Or build a snowman!" Octavia was the bubbliest girl Clarke had ever met, but it was better than if she had been shy and the two of them would have sat around in awkward silence all day.

Clarke could only nod in agreement, though she didn't really know what she agreed on, before Octavia tugged her along.

It was only then when Clarke realized the teenage boy sitting on the sofa, reading some old book. He had thick brown curls, and even from the distance, Clarke could see the freckles dancing across his face. He looked up when he felt Clarke's gaze, and for a second, their eyes locked before he turned his attention on the book again.

Clarke blushed and turned away, but caught a quick glimpse on the book's title before Octavia pulled her to the front door. Iliad by Homer.

"Mom! Mom, Clarke and I are going outside to play!" Octavia shouted for her mother to hear.

The girls got dressed in their thick winter coats, gloves, scarfs and caps. Then they headed outside.

The Blakes had a small garden which soon turned into a snowball fight arena. The girls played and laughed as their cheeks turned red until it was getting dark, so they decided to head inside and warm up over a hot chocolate by the fire.

Aurora laughed when they came in, ruffled their hair and made them cocoa. The girls sat next to the fireplace, wrapped up in blankets and slurping their drinks. Clarke didn't even think about her parents anymore. She was warm and happy and glad she had a new friend.

"Bell, will you tell us a story?" Octavia suddenly asked her brother, who was still sitting on the sofa, reading.

Bellamy didn't even look up when he said "No."

"Oh pretty please Bell! You know, Bell's great with stories and myths. Someday he'll write his own, I'm sure!" She said, turning to Clarke.

Clarke only smiled half-heartily. Bellamy made her feel uncomfortable again when she had just begun to feel home.

"Why don't you to just play with your Barbie or something?" He asked, slightly annoyed.

Both Clarke and Octavia were offended.

"We're no little kids, you know!" Clarke exclaimed.

"You're not?" he asked, arching a brow "Then who just played around building snowmen and stuff?"

"Um, normal kids, you know? Maybe you're just way too stuck being inside reading boring history stuff!" Clarke fired back.

He shut his book. "I'll go up to my room. I can't read in peace with stupid children acting like toddlers."

Octavia rolled her eyes as her brother disappeared.

"He's such a drama queen. He's in that stupid age where he constantly has to prove how 'grown up' he is. Don't let him bother you."

Clarke shrugged. "What a jerk."

The other girl sighed. "I miss him playing with me. Puberty. Ugh. I hope when I'm in that age they have developed a cure against it."

Clarke chuckled.

O began telling stories her brother told her, about emperors, warriors, women with snakes as their hair. Clarke was immediately fascinated by them and was disappointed when Aurora called for them to come to dinner.

Dinner was great. Clarke had to admit that Aurora was a better cook than her mom. She made turkey with cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie and pudding for dessert. It was delicious and Clarke dug in.

"You can eat pretty much for such a small girl" Bellamy commented.

Clarke assumed that it was supposed to offend her, but she just shrugged and complimented Aurora's cooking skills. "I just eat so much because it's so good. Even better than my mom's food."

Aurora smiled delighted. "Thank you, Clarke. See, kids, this is how make someone feel appreciated. You should try that sometime, too." She said jokingly, but Bellamy shot Clarke a murderous glare.

"Oh, great, the princess with the perfect manners has just been here for a few hours and is already a better child than we."

Clarke started to get mad. What the hell had she done to him?

"At least I have any manners, and frankly, you should try to learn some, too, because karma's gonna get you one day."

"Wow, did you just turn a Christian feast into a Buddhist lesson? Then I really hope I'm going to be reborn as a bird so I can shit on your head."

She snorted. "Now that's really deep, Bellamy. Congrats. You should consider becoming a monk. Isolation and fasting could work wonders to your huge ego."

"Me, a huge ego? How about you? What do you get for Christmas? Will daddy get a pony and a tiara for the little princess? Or how about a castle?"

Clarke paled immediately. "Unfortunately, my daddy won't get me anything for Christmas, since he died two months ago." She spat out, and then she got up and stormed out of the room.

She locked herself in the bathroom, unable to hold back the tears anymore. All her grief and desperation came up again when she thought about her dad.

How she would never spend another Christmas with him. That he would never spend a Christmas with his grandchildren who gave him paintings and he would gush about how beautiful they are.

She tried her best to hold back her sobs but failed. There was a soft knock on the door.

"Clarke? It's me. Do you want to talk?" O's voice sounded muffled through the door.

No, she didn't want to talk. But she also didn't want to upset Octavia, so she unlocked the door and wiped away her tears with the back of her hand.

"I'm really sorry. Bellamy didn't know. And he's not as bad as you think. He's just pissed because he doesn't want to spend Christmas with a complete stranger. And I'm sorry about your pa, too."

Octavia sat down and pulled Clarke into her arms, gently caressing her cheek.

"My pa died, too." She whispered. Clarke looked up to her in surprise, and saw tears filling her friend's eyes.

"It was three years ago. He was in the army and didn't come back from a mission in the Iraq. It scares me that I keep forgetting so many details about him because I was so young when he died. And I miss him. Still."

She was crying now, too, but still caressed Clarke, trying to comfort her.

"We got the message of his death on Christmas Eve. That's why Bell's being so aggressive and doesn't want an 'intruder', as he put it. We're all a bit sensitive on Christmas, but Bell's the worst. I think he still can't handle it."

They didn't talk for a while, just finding comfort in each other's presence, knowing someone shared their grief.

Eventually Octavia wiped away her tears and got up.

"Wait here. I'll be back in a minute." With that, she disappeared.

Clarke let her head sink against the wall. Poor Octavia, poor Aurora. Even poor Bellamy. She even started to understand his aggressive attitude towards her. A bit.

A few moments later, she could hear steps and voices, getting louder each second.

"Damn it, O. It wasn't my fault. How would I know her dad died?"

"Maybe because mom told us but you were too stuck up to listen? And you started the whole fight. Gosh, can't you relax a bit? Christmas is about love and peace, ok? So just be nice for once and apologize."

The steps stopped right before the door and she heard a low curse.

Then he knocked but didn't wait for a response and just let himself in.

Bellamy looked uncomfortable and rubbed his nose.

"I'm sorry I brought your dad up." He mumbled, not meeting her eyes.

She was aware of the fact that he only apologized for that one specific topic, but not for all the insults and his offensive behavior.

"It's okay. You didn't know about it."

When he nodded and turned to leave, she added "I'm sorry about your father."

He stopped in his tracks and turned his head. His glance was not friendly, but not as scornful as before. His face was hard to read.

"Thanks. Me too." Then he turned and left.

Clarke followed him after a few seconds. They all sat down at the table. Clarke apologized for running off, but Aurora assured her it was not her fault. At these words, she shot Bellamy an accusingly look.

He looked mad and opened his mouth to say something, probably that it's not his fault, but changed his mind as Octavia gave him a warning glance.

After a while, the tension eased and they started do chat happily as Aurora served the dessert. All but Bellamy. He was sitting there, silent, barely looking at the others.

As soon as he ate up, he grabbed his book and disappeared. They heard his steps stamping up the stairs and Aurora sighed silently.

"I'll be right back, girls. I'll just say him goodnight." She said, smiled at them and then went after Bellamy.

There were a few minutes of silence.

"You wanna watch the Christmas parade on TV?" Octavia asked, back to her cheerful self.

"Sure!" Clarke agreed, and for the next half hour or so, the girls were sitting on the sofa, giggling, eating chocolate and enjoying the parade. Finally Aurora came in.

"How is he?" Octavia immediately asked.

"Okay. I guess he's just upset because we haven't visited his grave today." The woman sighed and stole a bit of their chocolate.

Clarke narrowed her brows. "His father's grave? Why didn't you?"

Mother and daughter exchanged a quick look, and Aurora seemed a bit uncomfortable.

"I didn't think you wanted to come with us, since cemeteries aren't a fun place to be at Christmas Eve."

The blonde girl's eyes widened.

"You didn't go… because of me?" No wonder that Bellamy had been angry at her.

"I'm so sorry! I wouldn't have minded, you could have just asked me! I could have stayed here and watch a movie or something." Clarke said troubled.

"It's Christmas, after all, and I couldn't let you alone Clarke. Since you mother had to, it just wouldn't be fair." Aurora explained.

But Clarke refused to let it go. "But it was your tradition! It is… I mean, you have to visit his grave! You can't leave him alone on Christmas!"

Aurora seemed to think about it.

"It's only 10 P.M. Still enough time to visit him." Clarke pointed out softly.

Octavia suddenly wide awake and she looked hopefully at her mother, waiting for an answer.

"I guess…" Aurora slowly said, but her daughter already let out a sigh of relief.

It was clear that not visiting her father had been bugging her, too, though she was much better at concealing it.

"I'll go get Bell." She stood up and went out of the room.

"Are you sure you're okay with this, Clarke?" Aurora asked her carefully.

"Sure. I can just go to bed, it's late for me." She replied, though the thought of being alone in an alien house did kind of frighten her.

Aurora smiled in thankfully.

"Thank you so much, Clarke. This is really important for the kids. Christmas is a bit critical, but I'm sure Octavia already told you so."

"Yes, she did." Clarke nodded. "But I have to thank you for letting me stay here. You didn't have to. And you even skipped visiting you husband's grave for me. Thanks, Aurora."

The woman pulled Clarke into a tight hug.

"I'm glad you're here. O's not half as upset as she usually is on Christmas."

Clarke smiled at the thought that she made Octavia forget her worries.

Sister and brother stumbled into the living room now. Bellamy wore the first real smile she had ever seen on him. It made his entire face light up.

Aurora stood up and softly stroked Clarke's hair. "Goodnight, Clarke."

"Goodnight, Aurora, goodnight Octavia." She gulped and avoided his gaze as she said "Night, Bellamy."

Octavia hugged her shortly while Bellamy responded with a low grunt.

Then they were gone.

Clarke continued to watch the parade for another twenty minutes, but when she found it harder and harder to open her lids after blinking; she decided to go to bed.

It was in the middle of the night when she woke up, thirsty as hell. She sleepily made her way to the bathroom and drank out of the tab before returning to her room.

Just when she reached for her door knob, she heard a sound from the room next to hears. She tip-toed over to the door and pressed her ear against it.

It was sobbing. Painful sobs of a boy who'd lost his father.

Clarke tried to hold back her own tears of pity for this teenage boy going through so much grief.

She silently made her way back to her own room. When she lie in bed she struggled to fall asleep and when she finally did, she dreamed about her father, taking care of her like he used to when she was sick.

When Clarke woke up in the morning, she went through a moment of confusion about where she was, but quickly reminded herself that she was at the Blake's house.

She changed out of her pyjamas and went downstairs, to see the Blake's already sitting around the table. The children apparently had already unwrapped their presents, and they had smug and peaceful expressions on their faces.

"Clarke! I didn't know whether to wake you or not. I'm sorry we don't have any presents for you, put your mother will pick you up sometime soon and then you can have yourselves a merry little Christmas at home." Aurora smiled and Octavia cheerfully exclaimed "Good morning, Clarke!"

Bellamy shortly nodded his head, but there was a hint of a smile on his lips.

Aurora had clearly put some effort in the breakfast; it was so much and so many different dishes and it tasted heavenly. Clarke dug in again, but this time, Bellamy didn't comment on it.

Clarke was really surprised when she was disappointed at the ring of the doorbell. Yesterday, even before she entered the house, it had been a sound she was longing to hear, finally releasing her and get to real Christmas. Christmas with her mom.

But now, instead of lighting up with joy, her face fell. She liked it here. She really liked Octavia, as well as Aurora. They had been funny and kind and caring and she didn't want to leave them just yet.

About Bellamy… well, she wouldn't miss him too much.

Clarke hesitantly got upstairs and packed her bag while Aurora opened the door.

She heard the women chatting as she returned. Octavia was standing in the corridor as well, also wearing a disappointed look.

"I really hope we meet again soon, Clarke! Just come over!" The other girl hugged her and Clarke promised her to visit her soon.

Aurora hugged her, too, and Bellamy smiled at her. Wow. That must have been an effort for him.

When Clarke got into the car, Abby asked: "So, was it really that bad?"

Clarke just smiled and shook her head.

So that's the first chapter. This story stretches over about 20-25 years, though I'm not sure yet. It'll be 10 chapters from what I've predicted, each one happening in the holidays.

Tell me what you think of it!