Just Give me One Reason
Chapter 1: It's Kinda a Funny Story
It's in the stars
It's been written in the scars on our hearts
We're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
Just Give Me a Reason by P!nk ft. Nate Ruess
Love is kind of a funny story, how one minute you have no desires and the next you are absolutely head over heels for someone. I never thought that it would happen to me, that I would not be willing to give my heart to someone. It was not until my young twenties when I first laid on her. She was reading an old Atomic Theory textbook, sitting at an empty table during lunch. Her long hair was pulled into a ponytail; she wore the gray outfit that everyone in District 13 was required to wear. I did not know what my mind wanted to do, but after I got my lunch tray I decided to go to her table, instead of talking to the other soldiers that I grew fond of over the years.
I took a seat next to her, which seemed to be ineffective since she did not even budge a bit. She was too engrossed in her book to know what was going on around her. I sat there quietly, watching as her petite hand reached over to grab the apple on her plate. She finally closed the book and jumped a bit when she first noticed me. "Oh dear, you scared me," she laughs a bit, her blue eyes meeting mine.
"I apologize, but you seemed to be a bit lonely sitting all by yourself," I smile at her, not moving from her gaze.
She looks away and grabs a fork and takes a bite out of her pasta, then replies, "Oh yeah, I love to read when I have my free time."
"I do not blame you," I turn to my food as well, and take a bite of my own pasta. There is quiet for a bit before I say another word, "so what department you work for?"
"The atomic testing site," she lays her fork down and turns her body towards me, balancing the book on her tiny lap, "where everybody is pretty much at risk for everything. I enjoy it though, it is interesting looking at the affect that our district can have."
She smiles at me, a small warm smile that made me smile as well, "well that is very interesting, dear."
"Thank you," she is looking back at my eyes again, and I am trapped in the water like pupils again, "so what department do you work in?"
I snap out of it and look at her again; I did not hear a word that she was saying. I just reply with a simple, "what?"
She giggles and gets up to put her tray away, "what department you work in, silly."
I laugh as well, "Well I just cannot help staring at a beautiful girl like you. "
She blushes a bit; "well I need to know your name before we start flirting with you, sir."
"Boggs, yours?"
"Marie."
I smile, and without thinking, "will I see you again tomorrow?"
"What lunch assignment do you have, may I ask?" she brushes a loose strand out of her face and places her tray on the cleaning rack before collecting her items.
I do the same and reply, "third unit."
"Well it seems that I will be seeing you again, sir," she smiles and bows her head, "now if you excuse me, I must be heading back to my unit." Without another word, she is out of sight.
The Next DayI walk into the lunchroom, and grab my lunch like usual. This time I was scanning the lunchroom to find Marie, but I could not see her. I give it five minutes before taking a seat with a group from my unit. I look down at my food, not talking to the group that was slamming me with questions. Eventually I look up and Henry, a solider that was missing an eye and was pretty rough looking, asks me, "so where were you yesterday?"
"None of your business," I shake off the question.
"I think I saw him with a girl," another solider laughs, he looks over at me, "she was a looker, too." I feel the heat go up to my cheeks; did they actually see me with Marie yesterday? I felt a tad embarrassed being noticed. I was the one that generally everybody did not make fun of.
"Is that true?" Henry puts hand on my shoulder, "judging by that blush, I think it is. She was not apart of our unit?"
I shake my head, "no, she is apart of the Atomic Testing unit. She said she would be at lunch today, but I was in able to find her."
Henry taps the table with a bony finger, "I think Coin was telling me that there was an issue with radiation that her unit had to handle. If I remember correctly they are either going to be late for lunch or their lunch go pushed back till later."
I sigh and look over at the door, wondering if maybe she would come through with the rest of her unit and I could explore more about this mysterious Marie. I could hear someone behind me say something, "it looks like quiet ole Boggs has found himself a mate." I turn around and laugh at the comment. They were right; I did find someone to love.
I had gotten done with lunch early that day and just sit there and talk with the fraction of my unit that I could stand. I hear chatter from behind and turn around, a group had entered the cafeteria, all of them soaked to the point where they could not get dry anytime soon. They must have been the Atomic Testing unit. I turn around; maybe Marie was not with them.
"You go ahead and look for him dear, I will go get your lunch for you," an older man's voice was a whisper behind me, "just give me your ID card." There was a small exchange before I see the man out of the corner of my eye walk away. Henry leans over and whispers something into his assistance's ear that I could barely make out, but I had a feeling that she was standing behind me. I feel a petite hand touch my shoulder and I turn around, and it was Marie.
"Oh, I am so sorry that I was not here earlier, sir," she bows a bit. I never knew why the Atomic group actually bowed; it was contrary to the rest of the District's traditions. She explains a bit, "there were reports of an atomic radiation that could be deleterious to our district's health. We handled it, and luckily it was minimal amount that could easily be cleared."
I was about to speak, but Henry beats me to it, "I am Henry Golightly, commander and Coin's right hand man, also first in command of the Defense unit. May I say, thank you for the risk that you took for our district. May I ask your rank and name?"
"Well it is an honor to meet you Commander Golightly," Marie sighs a bit and bows a bit, "I am Marie Evans, second in command to the Atomic Testing unit. It is our unit's job, so I am happy to help."
"Such a high ranking for a little girl like you, so I am assuming that your father is first in command. You must be Daniel Evan's daughter," Henry leans back in his chair, "you have your eyes out for little Boggs here," he pats my back, "I must say, he has a great taste in woman. You seem like a beautiful and intelligent young lady Ms. Evans. You two got my approval if you wish to start dating." He laughs a bit and gets up along with the rest of the unit, "now Boggs, I will give you the rest of the night off, have fun you two, and do not get in much trouble." He is gone, along with the rest of our unit.
Marie takes the seat next to me and pushes her chair a bit closer, "is he always like that?"
"Who?" I reply, looking at her.
"Commander Golightly?"
"No generally he is more cocky."
Marie gets a kick out of it, a smile returning to her face. The older man that I predicted that she was talking to earlier walks over to us. He was older, his face dropping a down a bit, but he still was able to keep a smile on his face. He was pale, with short dark brown hair, he wore glasses that fell off of his nose when he looked down. "Is this the boy?" he had a thick accent.
"Yes father," she looks over at him and leans over for a second and whispers in my ear, "this is my father, act calm and he will like you." I nod watch as he lays a plate in front of her and takes a seat across from me.
"So," he starts, placing a napkin into his lap, "unit, rank, name?"
"Defense, second in command, Boggs Danielson," I keep my eyes locked at his, which seem to be looking of something wrong with me.
"Hmm…Defense, why did you get into that?" he interrogates me.
"My father was second in command before he retired to the Hospital unit, sir," I reply, feeling my hands tremble a bit.
"Do you know who I am?" he looks down at his food and takes a bite.
"Daniel Evans, leader of the Atomic Testing unit," I knew he was a leader, because they were generally in their forties, which this man was.
He smiles, "you seem to be educated about your district."
"It is my duty," I smile.
"Well I am going to leave you two alone," he smiles," be kind to my daughter." He gets up with his tray and walks over to the table where the rest of his unit was sitting at. Marie sits there and bites her lip, and I am guessing she was just as embarrassed as I was when Henry was talking to her.
"I am sorry for that," she whispers and takes a bite of her lunch and stares at the wall, "he just loves to embarrass me whenever he has the chance. I guess that is why most guys do not like me. I will not be surprised if you want to leave right now."
"I think my father would be exactly the same way," I reassure her, "so I am not leaving, not even when we have not been able to flirt like we were supposed to yesterday." I see her bright smile once again, and could not smiling myself.
"Well I would like to get know more about you, sir," she smiles and reaches over with her free hand and gently touches my cheek, "because a handsome guy like you must have a great story." I reach up and touch her hand as she touches my cheek. There was no reason for me not to enjoy the touch, it made me feel warm, like that there was actually something that I cared about in this world.
"There is not much," I tell her, I could not believe I was actually speaking to this stranger, but I close my eyes, feel her touch again and explain more, "I lost my mother to the small pox outbreak that we had about four years ago. My father was devastated and he stepped down, worried that he was in able to do the job that he had and ended up giving it to me. Henry was the leader at the time was well, and agreed the decision was a good idea and I was promoted to second-in-command. I had a pretty simple life besides that."
I open my eyes, and to my surprise, she is smiling and staring right at me, "you, sir, are amazing. I apologize for your mother though, I know how you feel, I lost my mother during that spread as well. Almost lost my father as well, if it was not for Dr. Aurelius." Marie sits there and runs her fingers along my cheek, then eventually behind my ear, scooting some hair along with it. "We have a long time to talk, you know," she whispers to me, "it is good to figure out about each other before we move along any further in a relationship."
I nod and look at her, "I completely agree, maybe we could head to your compartment or we can go to mine."
She removes her hand and smiles, "lets head to yours, because knowing my father he will come and stalk us if we go to mine."
"Fair enough," I get up and grab her tray and mine and start walking towards the cleaning rack, "and I think you should tell your dad before we go." She nods and walks over to her father and explains the situation. I could observe a smile on his face as he nods at what his daughter is saying, "Just make sure that you guys are just talking. You know that I will kill the guy if he ends up wanting to go any further. Anyways, I trust you, go ahead, and have fun. I will see you at dinner, sweetheart."
Marie smiles, hugs her father, and walks over to me. "I could hear him, and I believe he said yes?" I smile at her, wrapping my arm to where we were arm to arm.
"Yes, of course, just do not go any further," she smiles, "we will save that until we are married."
"I can take that," I smile at her, "lets go and just have a nice conversation." Then we exit out of the cafeteria and enter the halls. We walk towards my compartment; she was looking around, because this was the floor the hall that the Defense people stay in. I smile and take out my ID card with my free hand once we reach my room. She smiles and continues to look around when I unlock my door. I turn my head and notice a couple smiling at us as they stood there hand in hand. He leans over and kisses the girls cheek and shouts at me, "you two look cute together, Boggs!" Then I realize it is a friend of mine, someone that I went school with.
"Thanks!" I shout back at him before opening the door and letting Marie step inside. She walks over to my bed before I even turn on the lights. She looks at me and crosses her legs and then starts looking around.
"You have an amazing compartment, it is large," Marie smiles, then pulls her brown hair out of her ponytail and let it fall, "it feels very comforting."
"Thanks," I smile at her, this time taking a seat next to her and pulling an arm around her shoulder. She leans her head onto my shoulder, "I still cannot believe that we met yesterday, you are not a stranger anymore."
"Maybe it is because I met you father," I look at the top of her head.
She silently laughs, "Yeah, he is a real great judgment of character. He likes you Boggs, I could tell by his facial expression when I said that I was going to your compartment. I have not seen him light up like that since my mother was alive and she told him that she was pregnant again, but soon later losing the baby."
"I am sorry about that," I sigh, "about the baby and losing your mother. Some things are not meant to last."
"Nature's first green is gold/Her hardest hue to hold/Her early leaf's a flower/ But only so an hour/ Then leaf subsides to leaf,/ So Eden sank to grief,/ So dawn goes down to day/ Nothing gold can stay," Marie recites lines a poem, but I could not remember the name of it, "my dad used to say this when he felt depressed about my mother. Eventually I started to memorize it myself."
"What is the title of that poem?" I ask her, leaning my head on top of hers.
"Nothing Gold Can Stay by Robert Frost," she grabs my free hand and intertwines our fingers, "you know, it feels good to actually meet someone that can understand me and I can trust to tell my stories to. Most of the guys that wanted to date me had only wanted to date me because they just wanted one night of you know what."
"I would never done that to someone, especially you. Truthfully you are the only girl that has made me feel this way. I never really have not been into this whole liking someone thing had seemed to stupid. Then I saw you and it changed my mind. I always thought that I was just going to stay single, not find someone, and then die alone. I do not think that anymore, and maybe I will live up to my mother's dreams for me," I say to her and she looks up at me and smiles.
"I am not that amazing," she looks into my eyes.
"Yes you are, you are beautiful. I definitely could see myself marrying you one day. The two of us living here, when our schedules say that we would have that hour of free time, we would lay down together and reminisce about our day. We would cuddle, our hands intertwined with each other, we would just be smiling, and it would seem that the whole world did not matter. Maybe, if we both are fertile enough, we could have children together. That would be a dream to me," I explain to her, "you are that amazing."
Marie leans up and kisses my cheek, "now that may be a dream that can come true." She lays back and looks up at the ceiling, I fall back as well, our hands still together.