As Albus entered his office, the overwhelming sense of stress consumed him. Sitting down in his chair and leaning onto his desk, the old wizard sighed.
"What seems to be the dilemma, headmaster?" Came a voice from the corner of the room. Dumbledore looked up, startled that there might be another person in the room bearing witness to his moment of weakness. It only took him a moment to realize it was just the lonely old sorting hat, sitting atop one of his many bookshelves, eagerly awaiting the next coming school year so he could do what he was best at; sorting new students into their houses. Albus sighed again.
"It seems…" he began slowly, contemplating how to word his next phrase, "that finding what I want to find most is becoming much more difficult than I assumed it would be."
"Love?" asked the sorting hat.
Albus felt himself blush. "No! No! I…was referring to the horcruxes, of course," insisted the old man.
If the sorting hat could have shrugged, he would have. Instead all he did was roll the wrinkles that resembled eyes, a human affectation he had picked up during his time in a school full of hormonal youths. "Of course you were," hissed the hat in his slow, sensual drawl. "You know, I might not be able to find love or horcruxes for you, but I could…relieve some of your tension, if you know to what I am referring."
Albus took a minute to think. Should he do this? Could he do this? What with the recent events leading to the ministry breathing down his neck and the return of Tom, not to mention Mr. Potter, who'd been unusually difficult of late. There were times Albus swore he could smell the hormones emanating from the boy. It always reminded him of his days as a young wizard, filled with lusts and desires. He smiled to himself as the memories flooded back into his mind. He turned to face the hat in the corner and approached it, slightly timid at first. "Don't be nervous," assured the hat, "I'll guide you along the way, help you…sort yourself out."
Albus giggled to himself. "If you insist," said the old wizard, still slightly unsure of his decision.
"Albus, I know it was a long time ago, but I did once allow myself to connect with your mind. I know you, and I know what you like. Let me guide you for once, headmaster."
With a sudden shimmer of light, something large and hard appeared beneath the fabric of the hat. "A sword?" asked the wizard aloud.
The hat smiled. "A sword of sorts."
Albus placed his hand into the hat and felt a huge, throbbing cock sitting there, waiting for him. Slowly the wizard removed his robes until he stood in his true form, naked in his office before the hat. Albus bent over and prepared himself for what he knew was coming. As the hat's massive sword entered him, Albus loudly moaned with the perfect combination of pain and pleasure. The hat thrusted, again and again, slowly gaining speed with each time he entered the ancient wizard. Before climax he pulled out and Albus put his hard penis into the hat, where he suddenly felt a sucking sensation. He, once again, started to moan loudly, not worried for his office was somewhat sound proof. He came, gripping the hat as hard as he could. The hate felt like a rock. He thrusted back and forth, the moment freezing in time, all thought cast away accept for the pleasure and the happiness that he thought he would never feel again. Then suddenly he heard a voice.
" Oh Albus, you really are the head master." The hat moaned.