The most loving parents and relatives commit murder with smiles on their faces. They force us to destroy the person we really are: a subtle kind of murder.

Jim Morrison

When Tony Stark was three years old, he adored his father.

At that age, Tony was incredibly intelligent, a genius, but still child who loved his parents like any other innocent child does, no matter how they treated him. He loved his mother too, of course, but his love for his father was deeper, and he could be often found following him around like a little lost duckling. He played near him, tried to sneak into his workshop, he looked at him with adoring eyes, he listened eagerly every time he told him about Captain American and how he saved the country. He evenpersonally knew said hero! Wasn't daddy amazing?

But daddy was never with him, and he always told him to go away, to stop following him, stop getting inside his workshop, to leave him alone. It hurt Tony deeply everytime daddy told him this, but he was intelligent enough to understand daddy was busy, and that he couldn't always have time to pay him attention. Besides, mommy said that daddy loved him, and that was enough. Maybe when he had enough time, he'd finally pay attention to him, maybe he could even play with him a little! But in the meanwhile, if he wanted to play he went to Jarvis or his mommy though she refused to play with him more and more often, and little Tony couldn't understand why.

"Why doesn't mommy want to play with me anymore?" He asked Mr. Jarvis one day. Jarvis smiled sadly at him and then distracted him by asking about how the circuit board was going.

"It's going great!" Beamed little Tony "Look!" And the child, successfully distracted, dragged the butler over his project and started chatting animatedly about it, delighted with the way Mr. Jarvis was paying attention and asking all the right questions.

"Do you think daddy will like it?" He asked once he finished his explanation.

"I'm sure he will love it" Mr. Jarvis assured him. Tony beamed happily and continued working on it. He finished it by the time he was four and proudly went to show it to daddy.

The first time he tried, daddy was talking with a scary looking man wearing a black coat. When the man noticed him and turned towards him Tony, in all his four-year-old innocent bluntness, asked: "What happened to your eye mister?"

"Tony!" His father snapped angrily "What the hell are you-!"

"Shut up Howard," The man told him sternly, making daddy look angrily at him. He then walked towards Tony and crouched down to his level.

"Are you okay mister?" Tony asked when he didn't move, waving a little hand in front of his face. The man chuckled slightly, ruffling his hair slightly "I'm okay, little one. And I lost my eye in a war if you must know,"

"You fought in a war mister?" Tony asked, his eyes widening in surprise "Was it the same war Captain America fought? Did you know him?"

"No, not that one, and no, I didn't have the privilege. Do you like Captain American, kid?"

"Of course!" Tony beamed "Daddy says he's a hero! I want to be like him when I'm older!"

The man was going to add something, but he was cut off.

"Tony, stop babbling nonsense!" He ordered tersely, making Tony's grin and enthusiasm die "Now go, Nick and I have important things to talk about."

"But daddy, I wanted to show you-"

"NOW!"

Tony wanted to protest, but he knew it wasn't wise and, sad and hurt, he ran away towards his room, where he curled around his precious circuit board and tried valiantly not to cry. Daddy said that Stark men didn't cry, and he was a Stark so he couldn't cry. But why didn't daddy want to see the circuit board? He was so proud of it, he wanted to show it to him! A few tears escaped from his eyes, and he doubled the effort to contain them.

Daddy was just busy, he told himself. He'd just have to show it to him when he was alone. Then maybe daddy would hug him and tell him how intelligent he was like Mr. Jarvis did. He may even let him inside his workshop! Little Tony smiled at this renewed hope and dried his face. He then went to look for Mr. Jarvis to see if he wanted to play.

The second time Tony tried to show it to him, daddy was drinking that stuff that made him behave weirdly.

"D-daddy?" He asked, hugging his circuit board against his chest.

"Hmm?" Howard hummed, not turning around.

"I- I wanted to show you something" Tony stammered, his heart beating nervously on his chest "Look, I made it myself!" He added when that didn't make him turn around. Daddy glanced at him and noticed what he was holding. He turned around and took it, examining it.

"This is a circuit board," He said, "You said you did it?"

"Y-yes, all alone!" Tony answered, a proud smile on his face.

"And why exactly did you want to show me this toy?"

Tony's smile crumbled down at those words.

"It's not a toy! It works!" He protested.

"And? This thing is just a toy, and I have no interest in it. Aren't you too old for toys by the way?" He added, handing the 'toy' back and turning around. Tony took it and ran away like the first time, curling on his bed and letting the sobs escape him. It didn't matter, he thought, daddy would never know.

After sobbing his heart out, he stared at his precious circuit board that daddy had labeled as a 'toy'. It seemed this wasn't enough for daddy after all. But why? Did daddy not love him? But mommy said that he did! Then why did daddy didn't like it?

The optimism typical of children made him decide that it wasn't that his daddy didn't love him. His daddy was very smart, so of course he'd think this was simple! He would just have to do something more complicated to get his attention! Tony smiled and began to think what exactly he could build next.

Well, daddy loved cars didn't he? He maybe couldn't build a car, but he knew something he could try

At the age of six, Tony Stark built his first engine.

He was quite proud of it, and he even tested it on one of daddy's cars with Mr Jarvis's help. He had been so proud that he had hugged him with a huge smile on his face, making Tony grin too. If Mr. Jarvis liked it, then surely daddy had to like it too!

He may have done it, of course...if the time tony chose to show it to him hadn't been one when his daddy was drunk out of his ass after another fail at locating Captain America.

"What is this boy?!" Yelled the man "Stop playing around! Steve is still out there, and this piece of shit won't help finding him!" He ranted and ranted about how useless he was, how Steve was a thousand times better that him until Tony couldn't take it anymore and ran away crying once more. But this time, Mr. Jarvis found him and hugged him worriedly, asking him what was the matter. Tony told him in between sobs, making Mr. Jarvis hug him more fiercely with each word. After he finished explaining and the sobs had subsided a little, Tony looked at Mr. Jarvis with tear-filled eyes and asked:

"Why doesn't daddy love me?"

"I'm sure that's not-"

"It is! I'm supposed to be a genius, I'm smart enough to see it!" He shouted, tears travelling down his eyes "I always knew it, but I didn't want to admit it! And mommy doesn't love either, does she?" He sobbed "Have anyone ever loved me?" He asked with such a broken voice that Mr. Jarvis's heart broke, bringing tears to his eyes.

"I do love you, Tony" He choked out "Never doubt it, my boy". Tony cried louder at those words and hugged him fiercely.

That was the day that Mr. Jarvis became just Jarvis.

It was also the day that 'mommy' and 'daddy' became 'Maria' and 'Howard'.

When Tony was seventeen Jarvis, the only one he considered family, died at a car crash along with his parents. That night, he got incredibly drunk and his college friend, James Rhodes, who he'd nicknamed "Rhodey", had to take care of him.

If he cried, both of them pretended not to notice.