True Love's Song Sings The Loudest Chapter 1, an once upon a time fanfic

Dear journal,

I am in love with Regina mills, and she hates my guts. I am so screwed.

Emma

Emma stared at the words she'd scrawled in her journal before she violently tore the page out and threw it to the ground. It had taken her most of her time in storybrooke to even come to terms with the feelings the mayor had stirred in her from day one, and she wasn't about to put them in her journal for documentation. Emma had never had a real girlfriend, but she'd slept around back in Boston, frequenting the beds of women all over the city just to leave with the rising of the sun. She sat, curled around herself and stared out the window at the very top of the mayor's mansion, and wondered what Regina was doing then. Her head was finally residing with her heart in that white house and she didn't notice Henry look into the room, trying to find his lost scarf. While he didn't find the scarf, he did pick up the ragged edged journal page on his way back out.

Regina looked in her mirror, her makeup smudged after her accidental afternoon nap while Henry was in town with David. Despite her greatest efforts, she could not get that boy to stay away from snow whites love. Or her spawn, for that matter. That spawn had, in fact, been the star of her dream and she didn't know what to make of that. Emma had run at her, trying to do something. Regina hadn't been quite sure what the blonde was going to do because Regina had kissed the blonde right on the mouth. Impulsivity was not her strong suit- she was all about planning - but there was some part of her that wanted to shake the unshakable Miss Swan. While she had slept with both men and women during her stay in storybrooke, no one created the sort of need the daughter of her nemesis did. It wasn't, in fact, hard to separate the two in her mind, as they couldn't be more different, and that could be attributed to the incredible disparity between both of their upbringings. Regina didn't just want the sarcastic blond who had spent a lot of quality time with Regina in her subconscious, she needed her. In real life, not just in her dreams. But if there was one similarity between snow white and her spawn, it was their mission to destroy the evil queen. But ever since Emma had come to town, that "evil" snow white had created was fighting its way out of her and the hero that saved the small six year old on a wild horse was coming back with a ferocity rivaling anything she'd ever felt.

Regina shook her head. There was no way Emma could ever be interested in the tyrant that stole her son away - so she let the girl fill her subconscious, knowing that'd be the only place emma'd ever be in her arms.

Henry peeked into his mother's bedroom, and saw Regina staring out the window, lost in thought, just as Emma had been when he found the piece of her journal.

"Mom? What are you thinking about?"

"Swa- oh nothing, sweetie. I thought you were gonna be in town for a little longer with... David."

"Mom, were you gonna say Swan, as in Miss Swan, Emma Swan?" Perceptive as ever, the ten year old ran his fingers along the journal page folded in his pocket. "I'm not dumb, you know. I've seen the way you two look at each other." Reginas eyes widened ever so slightly, noticing that Henry wasn't just talking about her, but the blonde as well.

"You really think- henry, no. Miss Swan-"

Henry cut her off, excited now. His book had talked so much about true love, and here it was, in real life, right before his eyes and they both couldn't see it. But he believed, in his heart, the truth of it. His moms were in love.

"Loves you. I swear it, on the story book."

"Henry that's the book talking. Happy endings only happen to story book heroes." Not villains like me, she added silently.

"Who says you're not?" The young boy responded, with the wisdom of someone 30 or 40 years his senior. He held out the journal page and said "I have a plan" his mother smiled at him, hopeful for the first time since Daniel. "Well, let's here it then"

"Miss Swan - the station - henry - trouble - help!" Reginas voice filtered through the static of Emma's radio.

"Aw, shit." She muttered, as she fired the bug back to life. Her coffee, which had been warm when she ventured out chilled to ice cold on her drive back into town from the woods where she'd been sitting. The car screamed over curbs, and people got out of her way instead of flipping her off the way they usually did. Being sheriff did have its perks, she said to herself, her heart in her throat. Part of her was worried about what had happened to Henry, but she couldn't stop thinking about the fact that Regina would be there also. Never mind the fact that she seemed to have a particular hatred reserved just for Emma, the blonde was still excited just to see those eyes look at her fo

Dear journal,

I am in love with Regina mills, and she hates my guts. I am so screwed.

Emma

Henry peeked into his mother's bedroom, and saw Regina staring out the window, lost in thought, just as Emma had been when he found the piece of her journal.

"Mom? What are you thinking about?"

"Swa- oh nothing, sweetie. I thought you were gonna be in town for a little longer with... David."

"You really think- henry, no. Miss Swan-"

"Loves you. I swear it, on the story book."

"Henry that's the book talking. Happy endings only happen to story book heroes." Not villains like me, she added silently.

"Miss Swan - the station - henry - trouble - help!" Reginas voice filtered through the static of Emma's radio.

r just a moment too long. She veered into the driveway of the station, yanking the car to a stop. She ran inside, hands instinctively wrapped around the base of her pistol. Her run slowed to a walk when she entered the dark office. She shuffled along, trying to get to the light switch when a crashing sound emerged from right in front of her. As the lights came flooding on, she realized she had gotten turned around and was now inside the jail cell across from the desk in her own office. Outside the cell, was her son, dangling her keys from his fingers.

"You forgot I was dropping in this afternoon to find my scarf, so I took some other souvenirs." Emma's eyes rolled back in her head as she realized the point of all this.

"Ok, Henry, I get it. I'm sorry for forgetting you were supposed to stop by. I was a bit preoccupied. Will you let me out now?" Instead of responding, Henry left, walking out slowly.

"Emma, you really are oblivious, aren't you?"

With that, Emma turned to stare directly into the eyes of Regina mills, who grabbed Emma's face and kissed her before the blonde could say a word.

The two lovers were each experiencing their own kinds of joy. Emma had basically stopped thinking and had just let her body respond to the mayor's. Regina, on the other hand, had her recent dreams flying through her mind at top speed, trying to recreate the fantasies that had been her only comfort in these past few nights, terrified this was her only chance.. Neither of them noticed the cloud of lavender magic emanating from the two of them, unlocking the town from their 28 years of timelessness and memory loss. The spell was broken.

All of a sudden, Regina and Emma were magicked from the jail cell to Reginas bedroom.

"We, you, us, we broke it!" Reginas voice was excited and higher pitched than normal, when she should be devastated. People all over town were remembering who they really were and what the evil queen had done to them, and she should be worried about a mutiny, but all she could think about was the fact that the universe had decided that Emma and her were true love. That was true love's kiss! And it felt like everything Regina had ever dreamed. Emma was doubled over in the corner, still reeling from their teleportation from the station to the mansion.

"What the hell was that?" Emma panted, lifting her head ever so slightly to meet Reginas eyes. Regina flushed, her mind whizzing to figure out what went wrong with that kiss. That beautiful, magical, kiss. "How'd we even get here?" Emma finished, standing up.

"Sorry, I got, uh, carried away back there."

"Yeah, so did I. But why are we here, in your house?"

"I figured you'd want to get out of there."

"Henry- the book- the spell- you- the queen- me- the savior- no it can't be. You're not evil. You're headstrong, and loyal and loving and caring not evil or murderous." Emma had never admitted it, but one of the reasons she didn't want to believe in the book was because she didn't want to believe that Regina was evil.

"I had hoped we'd get to at least go out once before we came to this part of my story." Regina said softly. "I was that person. The villain. I've killed people simply because they stood the wrong way. Tore out their hearts because they were in the way of my vengeance. I wasn't always that way, but you know that part of my story as well, don't you, miss swan." Emma nodded, trying to reconcile the woman she loved with the woman who had killed so many to try to kill her... Mary Margaret. The two sides of this incredibly complex woman were so disparate she didn't know where to begin. She knew that she was supposed to be feeling scared to be in the room with a murderer whose weapon was under her skin, but she had never felt safer. "I know it sounds crazy, but I am different. Emma, it's because of you. I didn't notice for so long, but I'm becoming who I used to be." Emma's mind was reeling, her thoughts going in circles. The thought of turning away tore her heart out, but the thought of staying made her stomach lurch with anxiety and her head hurt with the morality of loving a serial murderer. "Regina. I guess you know how I feel, because we wouldn't be here if I didn't ... like you a lot. But I just need to figure this all out."

"Emma, please." Reginas voice was almost a moan, a painful cry. Her dreams hadn't prepared either woman for the pain they felt as Emma turned her back and left the lavender bedroom.

The next morning found Emma on the cliffs edge, throwing daisy petals into the ravine.

"Go back. Don't go back. Go back. Don't go back." The dialogue continued as such, with every result being unsatisfactory to the confused sheriff.

It's not like your past is perfect. Emma thought to herself.

Yeah, but you've never killed anyone, she reasoned.

She was in

a bad place.

Yeah, and what happens if she gets in a bad place again? True love doesn't exist. What's she gonna do to the people in town? Besides, how long will I be able to stand this small town?

If I go back, Emma concluded, I'm listening to my heart. And my heart has no credibility whatsoever.

Mollified but feeling empty and in pain, Emma left the cliff to go deal with the confused and murderous townspeople.

Regina had paced about her room that night, unsure of how she was ever going to get up the courage to leave the house again. With no one on her side except for her 10 year old son and her pride long gone, how was she to stand up to the people who were, frankly, within their rights to slaughter her on her own perfect lawn. And why not let them? It's not as if Henry would be left parentless if she was dead, the town would be avenged and Emma would no longer be able to hurt her.

Or, Regina thought, I could leave. Leave and be protected by the 'creators clause.'

The curse was meant to continue some of its job once it was broken. Basically, anyone besides the caster couldn't leave the town without losing all their memories of the enchanted forest and their real identity. But because Regina had cast the curse, she could leave with her memories intact.

So it is decided. Regina grabbed everything she might need, left some cash for Emma and Henry and left without a goodbye. It was 4:37 am and Regina was leaving storybrooke, never to return.

When Emma came back into town, she saw the furious crowd gathered around none other than Regina's mansion. She swallowed hard, her eyes getting misty and her heart was stabbed once again. Henry was standing with David, tears streaming down his face. He ran to Emma.

"Where'd she go, Emma? Why did she have to leave? Why didn't she say goodbye? Is it because there is no more curse to protect her? Did you warn her about townspeople?"

"Henry, calm down. What are you talking about?"

"He's been going on like this ever since we got here. Saying things about you and the evil queen being together, which is preposterous, and that she is, apparently, gone." David stepped in. This is my fault, Emma realized, and a knife went through her heart. Or, at least, that's how it felt.

"I didn't ask you, Nolan." Emma snapped, turning back to her hysterical son. She bent and looked Henry straight in the eyes.

"Tell me everything, Henry. Starting from when you left my apartment yesterday." Henry looked up at David with uncertain eyes, and Emma led henry away from the crowd of rowdy citizens.

"I went to get my scarf and I saw your journal page on the floor." Seeing his mother's expression, he backpedaled quickly, saying: "I already knew how you two felt, it's painfully obvious. I brought the page to my mom, and I came up with a plan to get you two together. She helped me and then apparently something happened because you two broke the curse but now she's gone and I know she's gone because her suitcase along with one of your shirts you left once and there's a big pile of cash on the counter with our names on it. Also grumpy found out that none of the fairy tale characters can leave but apparently she could and Emma I miss her!" It was at this moment Henry broke down in complete tears. Emma held him, whispering comforting words in his ear.

"It's ok, kid, I miss her too. But look around you. If she had stayed, it wouldn't be good for her. Everyone here hates her."

"You too! Emma, don't you get it! It took me awhile to realize the evil queen and my mom are two different people. They used to both reside in the same person, but she's changed. And it's because of us. They're wrong. We have to show them."

"Kid, she killed lots of people. These peoples response is legitimate, warranted. The way she reacted to-"

"She was abused, Emma. Abused. Abuse can do crazy things to a person. When you spend your whole life in that kind of atmosphere, you start believing what they say."

"Kid, did Dr. Hopper tell you all this?" The boys flushed face revealed that Emma was right. While her face was smiling, her heart and head were at war.

Emma, you see that change in her just as much as Henry does.

Yes, but what if I'm wrong? I've been wrong before.

Use your superpower. Was she lying that night?

No, but that doesn't matter.

Ok, but why do your what ifs get to ruin your happy ending?

What if this isn't my happy ending?

But what if she is?

No, Emma thought. I need to be here for the townspeople, not going off to find a chick she was crushing on. She turned to Henry and smiled and held his hand.

"Lets go, kid." His tears slowly drying he nodded, and Henry and Emma re-entered the crowd.

-6 months later-

Regina pulled a pair of old jeans over her legs, and pulled Emma's tee shirt over her head. Looking back at her in the mirror was a woman she didn't even recognize. Her hair longer than it had been in nearly thirty years, it was pulled back in the simplest hair do she'd ever worn. Unbeknownst to anyone, Regina had always loved art, particularly painting. She had so much money here, one of the advantages of being the one who cast the curse. She painted during the day and, during the night, she did whatever she wanted. She had created an entirely new being: one that loved green juice and yogurt, one with many cats, that would go out sometime to ride horses at a ranch near Boston, a nice person, Gina. She would introduce herself that way, trying to do everything she could to separate the evil queen and the Bostonian she was becoming. She had friends, favorite tv shows and a plethora of tee shirts. Her collection of silk suits had been cast aside within the first week , and while she knew this was her truest self, her heart wasn't in it. Her heart was with those she loved most, and they were four states and many misunderstandings away. Her only worry was that if Henry ever wanted to find her, he wouldn't even know who she was.