Author's Note—This is the final part of the Autumn Trilogy, my series of Yahiko/Tsubame-centric fics based off the Red Curtain Trilogy (although I have yet to see Strictly Ballroom…eh-heh…). This is also the longest of the three fics, clocking in at a little over 8000 words (not including author's notes). That's 16 pages in Word, size twelve font, Times New Roman.
Wow.
Anywho, I tried hard to make this the best of the three, since it IS the last one. Out with a bang and all that. I wrote the beginning of this listening to random music, but from the dream sequence on, the song was Michael W. Smith's Do You Dream of Me, which is the song I always planned to use as a reference. It's a very loose reference (as are the other two songs used in the previous fics), but it worked for me. I also added the song Come What May (movie version), from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack, which fits because this is essentially the Moulin Rouge of the Trilogy. So if you see any references to that movie, yes, I tipped my proverbial hat to it (I couldn't help it!). I also have some X references. Ahh, X. Inspiring angst since 1995…
This fic is also a mirror (of sorts) to the first two. There are a LOT of similarities. I chalk that up to bad writing on my part. But it's also an incorporation of both My Confession and Stand by You…Forever, so there's naturally going to be recurrences. …Just…these are glaringly obvious ones. glares at ficcie Curse my inability to write things original!
Anywho, I hope that this fic, while long, is to everyone's liking. I tried my best, and this is what came out. Special thanks to Oneesan, Jchan and Akai for helping me out with this monster.
Please enjoy and beware the cheese!
"Within the Still of Night"
"So, I heard you two got in a fight the other day."
Yahiko jerked his head towards his instructor, piercing her with a glare. Or at least, he tried to. Kaoru shrugged his look off like she usually did, and continued to sip her tea.
When he noticed his look wasn't affecting her, Yahiko went back to stirring the food, adding a few vegetables into the brew as it began to bubble. "Well, you heard wrong."
"Which makes me right, if you're denying it."
Sighing, Yahiko only shook his head in long-suffering silence. Sometimes, the woman just drove him insane.
"So," she began again, and his knuckles turned white as his grip on the ladle tightened, "regardless of who's right and who's wrong, what happened? You and Tsubame-chan usually get along so well…"
"I already told you: nothing happened!" He began to stir the soup faster.
"If you keep that up, it's not going to cook right and will taste awful." He grumbled, but slowed his stirring. "That's better. So tell me what happened."
"Nothing bloody happened, ok? I said some things, she said some things, and we sorta just…walked away from each other. There, you happy?"
"For now," and the insufferable woman just continued to sip her tea, a coy grin plastered on her face. Yahiko wanted to throw something at her. "You have work there today, don't you?"
"Yeah, but not for another few hours. Here." The soup finished, he grabbed some bowls and ladled out four servings. "You can go and get Kenshin and the little monster now."
Kaoru smacked him upside the head. "Don't you call Kenji names."
"I call them like I see them. Now here," he shoved two bowls into her hands, smiling maliciously at the way he caught her off-guard. Sometimes, you have to settle with the little victories before you can get the big ones. "Let's eat, I'm starved."
"You're just cranky."
"Shut up, Ugly."
------
Two hours later, Yahiko stood before the Akabeko, sighing. He really didn't want to work. Technically, he didn't work there anymore, as he had no reason to anymore, since Kenshin had given him his sakabatou and he was busy with training new students, but when Tsubame asked him to come help out for a little while, he couldn't resist.
So now here he was, dreading walking into the restaurant to work for the next three hours, while a perfectly beautiful autumn day passed him by.
"What the hell is wrong with me? It's not like we had a fight or anything." His eyes narrowed. "It's not like it would matter if we had, anyway! Kaoru's just stupid."
But he couldn't shake the nagging feeling that what happened the other day did matter—at least to Tsubame.
Gathering his resolve, Yahiko pushed the door open and stepped into a very busy Akabeko.
"Welcome!" A familiar voice greeted him as he entered, and he smiled.
"Hello, Tae."
"Ah, Yahiko-kun! You're here a bit early, but that's just fine. You can get started right away, if you don't mind. The stuff is in the back." Tae smiled at him and bowed, and Yahiko nodded to her, then continued to the back.
He still couldn't believe Tsubame had roped him into the job though. An assistant cook. Him. He couldn't help chuckling at the thought. But Tsubame had asked, so of course he'd agreed to it.
"Yahiko-kun… Can I ask a favor of you?
Yahiko turned towards her, lowering his arm. Tsubame caught him towards the end of a training session, but Yahiko was pleased to see her. It wasn't often that she came by the dojo.
"What is it, Tsubame?"
"Um," she muttered, looking at her feet and shuffling slightly. Yahiko smiled softly at her. Even now, nine years after he first met her, Tsubame was still a shy little girl. "Well, it's about the Akabeko…" She paused, biting her lower lip. Yahiko put the tip of the bokken against the ground and leaned on it, letting his heart-rate calm down. The cool autumn air brushed against his face, drying his sweat-coated hair.
"You don't have to push yourself, you know," he whispered, grinning when she blushed.
"It's not that! It's just… Tae-san wanted to know if you would help out for a few weeks starting next week. Our head cook is sick, you see… And I know that you cook rather well, so I suggested…and she…well, she thought maybe you could help the assistant cook while he takes over the head cook's duties…"
Yahiko smiled at the memory. Of course he'd said yes, but… It still baffled him. He'd only taken up cooking all those years before because anything was better than Kaoru's food, and Kenshin hadn't quite been up, seeing as he'd just gotten through his ordeal with Enishi. But ever since then, he found himself making a few meals a week, and enjoying it to some extent.
And he had to admit, he wasn't all that bad at it, either.
The kitchen was busy as he entered through the curtained door, but everyone stopped to say a quick hello, and then they were all back to work. He did a quick check in both directions, but when he didn't see Tsubame anywhere, breathed a quick sigh of relief and completely entered the kitchen. Then he stopped short.
'What is wrong with me? Since when do I purposely try to dodge Tsubame…?' The knowledge that he was ignoring the girl created a strange feeling in his stomach—almost as though he was sick. The feeling passed quickly though, and he shrugged it off.
"Hey, Koji!" He called to the assistant—now head—cook. Koji turned and waved, then went back to whatever it was he was making. Yahiko peeked over his shoulder; udon, that was always a good choice. "What do you need me to do?"
Koji nodded his head to the left. "Start peeling and then chopping things. I need vegetables, and I need them now."
Nodding, Yahiko went to it, cutting everything that was handed to him. He noticed the humor of a swordsman chopping vegetables, and idly wondered if Kenshin sometimes chuckled to himself as he did mundane chores like this.
An hour quickly passed as Yahiko did random jobs for Koji, and still he hadn't heard or seen Tsubame. A part of him was rather happy about this fact, but the other part of him was beginning to worry. What if she wasn't feeling well? What if she was sick, or hurt? Should he leave and find her…?
The worrying finally interfered too much with what he was doing, and he stopped everything and started towards the doorway.
"Hey, Myoujin, where do you think you're going?"
"Sorry Koji, I need to check on something real quick."
"If it's Tsubame, don't worry. She's been here all day."
That stopped Yahiko cold. Turning slowly, his hands gripping the doorframe so hard the knuckles were white, Yahiko caught Koji's eyes. "I never said it was about her…" 'She's been here all day?! She couldn't say hi or anything? Why haven't I heard her? I've been listening!'
He paused as Koji watched him, a smile on his face. 'But I don't care, remember? Why would I be listening for her anyway?' Growling under his breath, he stormed back into the kitchen, taking the knife one of the waitresses handed him and going back to work.
Koji grinned the entire time.
Two more hours passed, and Yahiko still hadn't caught sight of Tsubame. First he was worried, but by the time he was getting ready to leave, he was just plain angry. Sure, they didn't leave on the best of terms the other day, but that was no excuse for ignoring him! And he had tried to find her after his first hour there!
"Tae!" He called, getting the owner's attention. She held up a finger, then finished her discussion with a patron. Bowing, she walked away, looking at Yahiko and nodding backwards.
"That was Mr. Komina, from—"
"Yeah, yeah, that's great," Yahiko waved off her explanation, his eyes darting around the Akabeko, trying to catch a familiar face in the crowd. "I'm going now, ok? Just…if you see Tsubame, tell her I wanted to talk with her, ok? And that I'm sorry I missed her…"
Tae hid a giggle behind her hand. "Alright, Yahiko-kun. I'll be sure to pass on the message. But my, are you two having a lover's quarrel?"
"No!" Yahiko shouted louder than he meant, and every head in the restaurant turned towards him. Coughing, he lowered his voice. "No, we are not! We're just friends, dammit! Why is everyone implying otherwise?"
"Because it's the truth, dear."
Yahiko really wanted to throw something, but contented himself to letting his eye twitch. "If you say so. But will you tell her, please?"
"Of course I will, dear. Now run along." She scooted him away as though he were still ten, smiling the whole time. Grumbling, Yahiko did as he was beckoned and left the building, his eyes never stopping in their search for Tsubame.
He made it back to the dojo without seeing her once. Furious and not knowing why, he stormed into the building, his aura positively glowing. Standing in the center of the dojo, Yahiko tried to focus, holding the bokken before him. Taking deep breaths, he slashed once, twice, numerous times, his eyes closed as he concentrated.
But still he couldn't clear his head.
'Ok…so I said something mean. I didn't mean it. She should know this! We fight all the time, it's not like I mean it! And she never tells me what she's really thinking! It's all a guessing game with her! That girl couldn't say a simple yes or no if it was spelled out for her to read.'
"Brother Yahiko…?"
Cursing under his breath, Yahiko opened his right eye to peek out. Kenji stood in the doorway, looking curiously in on his "older brother."
"What do you want, kid?"
Kenji entered the room completely, his eight-year-old feet pattering on the tatami mats. His looks still caught Yahiko completely off-guard. If not for his chocolate-brown hair, he would be the spitting image of his father.
"Mommy says that you need to come and eat now. You've been in here for hours…"
Hours? But hadn't he just gotten back from the Akabeko?
"Mommy also said that if you break anything, you're buying a replacement."
"Figures," he scoffed, walking over to join Kenji. The little boy scrunched up his nose.
"Brother Yahiko, you smell! Mommy won't like that."
"Well tough. She has to deal with you; I'm sure I won't be that much of a detriment to the dinner table."
"A what?"
Yahiko grinned. "Never mind. C'mon, let's eat."
"Aww, you're no fun, Brother!"
"Yeah? Well neither are you." Laughing, he grabbed Kenji and lifted him in the air, setting the boy down on his shoulders. Kenji giggled and grabbed tufts of Yahiko's hair. "Hey Kenji, did Kaoru or Kenshin cook?"
"Mommy did!" The boy was practically singing.
"Then we don't really need to hurry that much, do we?"
He earned a tug on his hair for that one.
Once they joined Kaoru and Kenshin, Yahiko found himself relaxing more than he had all day. At least he wasn't trying to decapitate things anymore.
"So what did you do today, Kenji?"
Yahiko rolled his eyes at the mother-son pair. Kaoru did this every night, although she was damn well aware of what the little monster did every day.
"I played outside! And I watched Brother Yahiko try to kill things."
Kaoru grinned. "You did, did you?"
"Tch. I didn't try to kill anything. I was just…letting off some steam." Yahiko protested in his defense.
"I think you should just go and talk to her, Yahiko. This whole affair is just putting you in a foul mood." Kaoru smirked even more when he nearly choked on his rice.
"What are you talking about? What affair? She can't have an affair if she's not involved with anyone, anyway!" He instantly thought of their argument the other day.
Kaoru and Kenshin both stared at him, blinking, their faces questioning, and Yahiko slowly realized what he'd said. Blushing to his roots, he shoved his face into his bowl, not meeting anyone's gaze.
"Yahiko…" Kaoru began, but he cut her off.
"More rice, please?"
Sighing, Kaoru took the bowl, filling it as Yahiko refused to meet her gaze. As soon as she handed the bowl back, he promptly ignored her and gorged himself. Once he was finished, he set his food down, said a hasty thanks, and nearly ran from the room.
Kaoru kept a room for him to stay in for those rare occasions he decided to stay the night. This was one of those nights. Too tired to walk back to his flat, he made his way towards his room, nearly dragging his feet. Once inside, he shut the door, unfolded his futon, and collapsed onto the mattress. He didn't even bother to change.
But yet he couldn't fall asleep.
He was struggling with that, trying to think of various ways to put himself to sleep, when he heard the door creak open. Sighing, figuring it was Kenji looking for someone to bother, he threw an arm over his eyes, letting his displeasure show in his voice.
"What is it, Kenji?"
"It's Kenshin."
Sitting up so fast the blood rushed to his head, Yahiko snapped awake. Kenshin stood in the doorway, silhouetted by the moonlight. Blushing and hoping Kenshin couldn't see it, Yahiko gestured for the older man to enter.
"You can come in, Kenshin. Sorry about being rude…I thought you were—"
"—Kenji. Yes, I figured as much. I'm sorry to disturb you."
"No, it's ok. I couldn't sleep anyway."
He couldn't see, but he was sure Kenshin smiled. Entering the room, but not closing the door, Kenshin made his way to Yahiko's side and then knelt besides the nineteen-year-old boy.
"I just wanted to make sure you were well. You didn't leave the table in the best of spirits."
Yahiko shrugged. "Yeah, that. It's nothing; I'm fine now. Just can't sleep is all."
Kenshin nodded and stood. "Very well, then. If that's the case I'll just leave you to try to sleep." He made his way towards the exit, but stopped with his back to Yahiko and his right hand on the door. "But Yahiko. You shouldn't worry too much about things like this. Just think about how you really feel, and let that feeling guide you. Then everything will work out well."
Not really sure what to say, Yahiko nodded, even though he knew his friend wouldn't be able to see it. "Uh…right. Thank you, Kenshin."
The older samurai inclined his head. "Goodnight, Yahiko."
"Goodnight, Kenshin. And thanks, really."
With a final nod, Kenshin left the room and closed the door behind him, leaving Yahiko in darkness once again. Sighing, the boy lay back down, his arms crossed behind his head as a pillow.
'Follow what I feel, huh? I'm not quite sure what he meant by that… I feel tired, and I feel angry and frustrated. Not sure how any of those would be helpful at a time like this…'
Sighing again, he rolled over, his left arm supporting his head. 'Maybe he thinks there's something between us, too?' He snorted. 'Ugly must be getting to him.' But you did flip out when you heard the word 'affair,' a little voice in his head (that sounded suspiciously like his own) whispered. Yahiko made an ugly sound in the back of his throat. 'That was… I didn't mean anything by that at all. Shut up, you're as bad as Ugly!'
The voice didn't say anything else, and eventually his eyes closed, and he fell into a deep sleep.
------
Wind howled all around him, and an eagle screamed into the night. Lowering his eyebrows and squeezing his eyes shut tighter, Yahiko tried to shut out all the noise and fall back asleep.
But that was when he nearly fell over.
'Huh? The hell…? Where am I…?'
After catching his balance, Yahiko squinted open his eyes, squeezed them shut and then popped them open, wide awake. He stood on the edge of a chasm, the other side over fifty feet away and barely visible. The sun was setting on the other side, and he squinted against the glare, shielding his eyes.
And then he saw her.
"Tsubame!" She was farther down along the chasm, and still heading that way. Either she couldn't hear him, or deemed to ignore him. Yahiko ran along the edge, trying to make himself even with her, but she kept moving farther and farther away. "Tsubame, wait! I'm right here, wait a second!"
She paused for a moment and looked at him over her shoulder, and he stopped cold. Her eyes looked dead, lifeless. Before he could notice anything more, she turned her back to him and walked away from her edge of the chasm, getting lost in a mist that appeared specifically for that purpose.
"Tsubame! Wait!" He knew his voice fell on deaf ears, but he couldn't help it. That was the first time all day he'd seen her, and she… She looked terrible. Completely different from her normal self. 'I have to find her! I've gotta help her!'
He ran along the chasm for ten minutes, but still it stayed an equal distance apart. Gritting his teeth in frustration, he was just about to turn back around when a shape materialized out of the gloom ahead of him.
A fallen tree crossed half the divide, and how it stayed perfectly horizontal, Yahiko had no idea. Not one to throw away any opportunity, however, he made for the tree.
Once he was beside it, he realized just how huge it was. Taller than him while on it's side, and wider than his full arm-spread, Yahiko wondered anew how it managed to hold itself up when more than three-quarters of the tree extended out over air.
'But it looks sturdy enough, and that's all I need. Who knows what's happened to Tsubame since I lost her?'
Climbing up the side of the tree was rather easy, and Yahiko felt confident that he was safe. The only problem was that there was still a good fifteen feet from the end of the tree to the edge of the other side. Trying to not let that discourage him, Yahiko squared his shoulders and took one hesitant step after another.
The tree was sturdy, and Yahiko's steps eventually gained confidence. Soon he was sprinting, slowing only to dodge the random hole or branch. Within minutes he was at the end of the tree. Looking back, he couldn't even see the other side anymore.
"The hell…? Nevermind, Yahiko. Just…you're on the other side now. Focus on that."
Taking a deep breath, Yahiko walked up to the very edge of the tree and looked out. He tried not to look down, but still did. His breath caught in his throat when he realized there was no bottom.
'Nothing to worry about… All I have to do is jump. I can do this. I can jump this far, I know I can.'
Still breathing deeply, Yahiko took a few steps back in order to get a running start. Sufficiently far away from the edge, he turned and began running right away.
Two feet from the end the tree started to sway, and he heard a cracking noise.
"Shit!" He pushed off from the edge at the same moment the tree rolled over, traveling a few feet along the ground and then plummeting into the abyss below. While that happened, Yahiko sailed through the air, alternating between prayers and curses.
He landed with a curse.
Falling to his knees, Yahiko dry heaved. He felt like he'd lost his stomach somewhere during his jump, and his heart was pounding so hard he couldn't breathe. When he tried to stand, his arms and legs tingled, but wouldn't respond in the way he wanted them to.
Collapsing against the ground, he tried to steady his breathing and collect his thoughts.
'Ok. I made it in one piece. Which is good, considering I didn't have steady footing at the end there. Damn tree tried to kill me on purpose!' Finding some inner strength, he raised his left arm and directed a rather rude gesture back towards the chasm. That done, and obscenely pleased with himself for it, Yahiko let his arm fall back to the ground. 'Now I just have to make myself get up and find Tsubame. …I hope she's ok.'
"I'm coming for you, Tsubame. Just…hold on."
Grunting and gritting his teeth, Yahiko placed his hands palm-down and pushed himself up to his knees, and from there to his feet. His whole body protested, but he didn't care. He had to keep going.
"I'm coming, Tsubame. Wait for me."
------
Tsubame turned, her short hair flying in her face. She could have sworn she'd just heard Yahiko's voice… But that couldn't be. He'd gone away from her the moment she arrived in this place.
Shivering, she wrapped her arms around her body, trying to keep the heat in. She'd woken up in this weird place, and the first thing she saw was Yahiko, standing on the other side of a cliff, with water separating them and the sun setting behind him. She'd called, but he didn't hear her, and had just walked away from her into the shadows.
So now she was searching for him. The sun had yet to go down completely, but the air was frigid, and she was only in her yukata. And guilt ripped at her the entire time.
'I shouldn't have ignored Yahiko-kun all day… He must be so angry with me right now. But I just didn't want to face him… I know he doesn't mean it when we fight, but he said such mean things…'
She tripped on a root, but managed to catch her balance before she fell to her knees. She hadn't been so lucky in the past, though. Her yukata was torn, and her knees were scraped and bloody from too many falls.
"Yahiko-kun…where are you?" Tears sprang into her eyes, but she willed them away. She had to be stronger than this! Yahiko wasn't always going to be there to help her, and he would hate it if she couldn't even defend herself. Taking a deep breath, she steadied herself and continued on, jumping the roots that had previously tripped her and clearing away the underbrush with a large stick she picked up along the way. She would prove to him that she could be strong—she would!
Eventually she made it to a clearing, and sighed in relief when she couldn't see anyone else. If she was alone, she was somewhat safe, as strange as that thought sounded to her. Making her way into the open area, she continued to look all around her for ambushes, but found none. Putting down the stick and sitting down, her back against a large rock, she closed her eyes slightly. 'Just a little rest…that's all. Then I have to start searching again. I know I'll find him…I know it!'
But would he even want to be found? He hadn't been the nicest person to her the other day…and he didn't really care for her as strongly as she thought she cared for him. Of course, they were friends, and that made her happier than anything. But lately she'd been doing strange things around him, like asking slightly coy questions, or getting angry when he didn't know exactly what she wanted, or just being upset whenever he wasn't there.
She even resorted to devious means in order to see him. It was true that they needed another assistant cook for a little while, but the moment Tsubame had heard that, she'd begged Tae to let it be Yahiko. True, he wasn't all that bad, and he'd only gotten better, but there were many candidates already lined up that would suit the job better.
"I'm just selfish…" she whispered, letting her eyes drift completely closed. "All I wanted to do was spend more time with him…"
A rustling sound behind her made her open her eyes wide. Her eyes darted everywhere, but her body was ramrod straight, and her breathing shallow. She'd let her guard down and something had snuck up on her!
Voices drifted into the clearing, and her breath caught in her throat. She knew those voices. Fear gripped her, stronger than ever before, and her breath came in shallow gasps. How could they be here? What was going on?
"Hey, you hear something, boss?"
'Oh no! Calm down, Tsubame, calm down! They haven't seen you yet. Just…don't make any more noise.'
"I think it came from that way. Boys, go look."
'Shit!' Her eyes widened and she clamped her hands over her mouth. 'I can't believe I just thought that!'
A shadow fell over her from the other side of the rock, and her stomach bottomed out.
"Well, well, looky what we got here. A little run-away, huhn?" A hand reached down and grabbed her by the hair, pulling her to her feet. Tsubame let out a whimper, but quickly bit it back.
'I won't give them the satisfaction of seeing me in pain! I won't!'
"Aww, I think the little girly is trying to be brave," the smelly man holding her snickered, then roughly turned her around to face the son of her former master.
"Why hello servant, fancy meeting you here. And my, but you've grown up nicely. Never would have thought you had it in you." The men all snickered at Mikio's joke. "Oh? Don't you have anything to say to that?"
Tsubame glared her response back at him.
"I'll take that as a 'no,' then. But defiance isn't a good trait in a servant, you know," he growled, advancing towards her and grabbing the front of her yukata in his hands. "Know your place!"
She still refused to answer, and he growled again, then released her clothing. Before she knew it, he swung around and punched her—hard—in the gut, and she gasped, doubled over in pain, suspended by the man holding her hair. And again, all she could hear were snickers.
'Yahiko-kun…I'm sorry. I might not be able to find you…'
She whispered a silent prayer before she reared her head back, smashing into her captor's jaw and sending him reeling. As soon as his hold on her was gone, she spun around and ranfor the trees, intent on losing the men behind her. Her sudden movement had caught them off-guard, but that wouldn't last long, and soon they'd be after her.
She refused to think of what would happen if she was caught.
Breaking through the underbrush, Tsubame ran on, the sounds of pursuit heavy in her ears.
"I'm coming, Tsubame. Wait for me." The words she thought she heard earlier drifted through the wind to her, and she found herself fighting back tears against her own will.
'If only that were true, Yahiko-kun…'
------
Yahiko chopped at the undergrowth, furiously trying to make headway, but failing miserably. Once he'd managed to get to his feet and move around, he found he was in some sort of forest. Which was odd, because there was no forest there before, only open prairie.
'This place just keeps getting weirder and weirder… And I still have to find Tsubame!
Ten minutes ago, he was sure he'd heard her voice on the wind, and she sounded as though she were in pain. Frantic to find her, Yahiko had careened through the undergrowth, but the forest itself seemed to be intent on stopping the boy. He made very little progress, and Tsubame's voice was gone entirely. But he was sure he hadn't imagined it! She was here, somewhere, and he would find her or die trying.
'I am coming, Tsubame! Just…hold on a little longer, please!'
If he was in trouble, how was she going to defend herself? He'd taught her some basics in defense, and she was a smart girl that could think up things on her own if she had to. But she was gentle. Yahiko found it hard to think that she would fight, even if she did know how. She wasn't like Misao or Kaoru; she hadn't grown up being taught fighting skills.
'No, she grew up a servant treated like a slave in some rich man's house. I'm not sure if that's less dangerous than growing up with a bunch of ninja and always fighting all the time.
'But what if this whole time I've been underestimating her? What if she is capable of these things? Sometimes it feels like I don't even know her…' His eyes narrowed. 'But "Yuu-kun" knows her just fine, it seems. Damn uppity brat! He goes to Germany for a few years and comes back and thinks he's the best at everything! I don't see why she's always defending him…'
It's that kind of thinking that led to your fight, that annoying voice whispered back to him. Maybe if you just trusted her…
'I do trust her!' He shot back. The voice didn't say anything, but he knew it was skeptical. 'I do! It's just…I don't see why she's always defending him when it's obvious he likes her…'
Jealous, are we?
'I am not jealous!'
Thought so.
Growling, Yahiko continued to hack at the undergrowth, intent on finding her.
'I'm not jealous,' he started again, 'but I shouldn't have said what I did to her. I know Yutarou is a friend; hell, he's my friend too. But I shouldn't have accused her of… What was that?!'
Voices drifted through the air towards him, and Yahiko ran forward, not caring. He never noticed that the foliage parted for him as he ran.
He made his way towards the voices and stopped dead. He'd run out onto the bank of a river maybe ten feet across, but it wasn't the water that stopped him.
It was what was on the other side.
Tsubame was lying on the ground, a group of men surrounding her. He didn't recognize them, but he didn't care. One of them had a crudely made club in his right hand, and there was blood on it. The other men were laughing and joking, and then one of them—Yahiko could only guess the leader—knelt down and began tugging at her yukata.
"BASTARDS!"
Yahiko's vision ran red, and before he knew what he was doing he was jumping into the water and rushing towards the men. They all scrambled to face him. All except the leader, who grabbed Tsubame up into his arms and backed away with her. He was the only one Yahiko focused on.
"Bastard, let her go!"
The man smirked and motioned with his hand, and the men all rushed forward. Yahiko barely paid them any mind, and instead beat them all into submission with his bokken. His mind registered that appearance of the weapon briefly, but he didn't let himself worry about it. He needed all the help he could get. Instead, his eyes remained riveted on Tsubame's limp form.
'Dammit, this is what I was afraid of! What if… What if they did something to her? Or what if she's already dead?' Nausea overwhelmed him at that thought, but he fought it down. 'No, no, she's not dead. Oh gods, let her not be dead, please! Please let me not be too late to save her!'
The men sent to attack him all fell to the ground and disappeared, but Yahiko paid them no mind. The leader looked less confident now that he was alone, and Yahiko wasn't going to let him get away.
"Let her go," he growled out, steadily advancing, the sakabatou held in his hands.
"Don't come any closer!" The man's voice shook, and he pulled Tsubame closer to him. She was still as limp as a doll.
"I said: let her go!"
The man licked his lips, and his eyes darted back and forth. He was divided between staying and fighting, but Yahiko didn't care. Taking the initiative, he lunged forward, flipping the sakabatou so that the bladed side rushed towards Tsubame's captor.
Unfortunately—or fortunately, Yahiko could no longer tell—the man threw Tsubame to the ground and ran before the sword could strike and cleave him in two. Instantly forgetting about the man, Yahiko caught Tsubame in his arms, the sakabatou gone.
He collapsed to the ground, the prairie winds howling about him as the forest disappeared. Tsubame was warm, but she wasn't moving. He couldn't even see her chest rise or fall.
"Oh gods, Tsubame…" He shook her slightly, his left arm supporting her head while he cupped her face in his right hand. Slowly, he ran his thumb in circles over her cheek, trying to wake her. "Tsubame, please wake up." His vision blurred. "Please…for me…" His voice was no louder than a whisper.
She refused to move.
A choked sob escaped his throat, and he pulled her towards him, rocking back and forth. Her body was cool.
"I'm so sorry, Tsubame! Oh gods…I'm sorry! I tried to get here on time, I really did!" Another choked sob. "Please wake up…"
Her eyes stayed shut.
A sound no human should make escaped him, and he buried his face in her hair, tears coursing down his cheeks to wet her hair. "I never meant what I said. About Yutarou. I know you would never do anything like that, I know…" He kissed the top of her head. "I was jealous, I'm sorry. I just…you're my Tsubame. I don't know when I started thinking like that, but you are…you were… Gods!" He kissed her head again and continued to rock back and forth.
Her body was cold.
And the sun finally went down as the wind picked up, carrying her away with the light.
------
Yahiko jerked awake, his body covered in a cold sweat.
"Tsubame!"
His eyes darted everywhere, and he realized he was back in his room at the dojo. Throwing off his covers—when had he covered himself up? He couldn't remember—he rushed to the door and slammed it open, slipping into his sandals and careening through the yard. The moon was still out and the grounds were pitch-black, but Yahiko made his way to the gate without any trouble.
Once out in the street, he rushed as fast as he could towards town, his heart racing and only one thought in his head.
He needed to see Tsubame, and he needed to see her now.
------
Tsubame struggled to run, her pursuers catching up. She was right about them not being distracted for long, and unfortunately, they were making better progress through the trees than she was.
'I can't let them catch me…! I need to find some way to get away…' Her eyes caught sight of a path, and she dived down it as fast as she could. If she could just find some place to hide, she would have a better chance.
The path led out to a prairie, and the forest melted away. Surprised, Tsubame slowed, but when she heard the men behind her jeer in triumph, she ran faster than ever before.
But they were faster.
Rough hands grabbed her from behind, pulling her to a stop. Struggling and kicking, Tsubame fought them with all her might, and they let her go. Scrambling away, she tried to find some shelter, some place to hide, but there was nothing. Only open prairie land.
She didn't get far before she was caught again, and this time she was pinned up against the man's chest. Even head-butting him didn't give her leeway to get away, and they only laughed at her struggles.
"That was a merry little romp, wasn't it boys? Now let's get down to business."
Mikio walked in front of her, leering. She glared as he looked her up and down, licking his lips. When he moved closer, his hand reaching out towards the front of her yukata, Tsubame lifted her knees and kicked out, catching him in the jaw. He reeled backwards, blood trickling out of his mouth from his bit tongue.
"Don't you dare touch me!"
His grin gone, he advanced towards her again, only this time from the side. Tsubame tried to kick him again, but she didn't have enough leverage and he smacked her across the face.
"You're going to pay extra now, little bitch."
"Let her go!"
Everyone's head, including Tsubame's, turned towards the new voice. For the first time in what felt like forever, Tsubame could feel hope swelling in her chest.
Yahiko stood about ten feet from them, his bokken held before him.
"Yahiko—" Tsubame started to say, but stopped when the man holding her pulled her hair hard.
"I said: let her go!" Yahiko looked terribly angry, almost frightening, as he charged towards them. The men all chuckled, and Tsubame saw them all holding weapons they hadn't possessed two minutes ago. She wanted to yell out to Yahiko to warn him, but her throat was dry, and she couldn't form words.
'No…no! Not now! I can't be weak and scared now! Yahiko needs me… I can't let anything happen to him, not again. This time, I'll protect him!' Her memory flashed back nine years to when he'd saved her the first time, and earned a cut arm for his troubles. 'He's always getting hurt because of me… I don't want anything to happen to him anymore!'
But despite her resolve, her body still wouldn't respond, and she was still mute.
Yahiko charged forward, and the men charged to meet her, the only ones staying behind being her captor and his boss. Her former master smiled as he coddled up beside her, his hand wandering along her side and making her shudder.
"It'll be over soon, darling," he whispered in her ear, his breath putrid. Tsubame felt dirty, but ignored the feeling. She focused on Yahiko, trying to will her own strength to him.
The men and Yahiko met up, clashing together. Yahiko moved fluidly, his grace the same as ever, if not better. He wasn't quite as fast as Kenshin—only Seta could be—but he was still fast. Tsubame watched him, trying to cheer him on silently.
Yahiko fought hard, and most of the men went down, their once-hidden weapons turning out to not be any hindrance to the young samurai. Tsubame felt that hope from before renew itself until she noted that some of the men were purposely holding back from Yahiko.
She noticed too late when they pulled out guns.
"Yahiko-kun, look out!" She shouted silently, her throat raw as her breath scratched against it. Struggling again, she kicked and bit, flailed and jabbed as much as she could, but her captor's hold only strengthened.
And then she heard the gunshots and stopped dead.
Yahiko stood in a circle of men, guns all smoking and pointing in his direction. His eyes were wide in disbelief, and he turned slowly to face Tsubame, hurt and betrayal in his eyes.
"Why didn't you tell me?" His eyes screamed at her. "Why didn't you do anything to help?"
"Oh gods…no." Her voice finally made it past the lump in her throat, and the man holding her let go and she slid to the ground, her hands going to cover her mouth. "I tried…I tried so hard…" Now that the need was gone, her voice returned fully and her throat no longer felt raw and damaged.
The men all laughed and jeered as Yahiko finally fell to the ground. The men beside her laughed the hardest and kicked her, sending her sprawling in the mud. They were standing on a dirt path, rain pouring down around them, puddles already forming around her. She absently noted this was the path to the tree where she'd mended Yahiko's sandal all those years ago.
She crawled forward, only her and Yahiko on the path. Tears coursed down her face, but she couldn't tell them from the rain even if she'd wanted to. When she finally reached the fallen boy, her hands reached out slowly, but stopped inches from his body.
Would he even appreciate her hovering over his body like this? He hated her, didn't he? She choked back a sob, but then broke down completely, unable to stop. Of course he hated her. She was useless to him. All she did was cause trouble for him because she was too timid and weak. If not for him, she would still be a servant. If not for him, she would more than likely let anyone do anything they wanted to her. He was the only reason she had any form of backbone now, and she'd failed miserably at bravery when she needed it the most. He had every right to say those things to her the other day.
"I'm sorry, Yahiko-kun… I tried…I tried so hard… But I couldn't do it…I couldn't help you this time…" She crawled closer, clutching his hakama in her hands and resting her forehead against his chest. "I told myself 'this time, I'll protect you,' and I couldn't do it!" She shuddered and let the tears burn her eyes. "I wanted to protect you…"
The rain pattered down around them, the mud turning reddish as his blood soaked into it.
Lifting her head, she looked at him. He had six different bullet wounds, all centered around his chest or stomach. A small sound escaped her throat, almost like a mew, and she reached out tentatively with her right hand, running her fingers lightly by each wound. His body was cold to the touch, and she flinched but refused to take her hand away.
"I really can't do anything…can I…? I love you so much, and I can't do anything…" Her hand dropped onto his chest, over the largest of the wounds. "I'm sorry for ignoring you, Yahiko-kun. I'm sorry we fought…I never even got to tell you that." Another sob racked her body. "I only care about you, Yahiko-kun…"
The wind howled past her, and soon she was alone, crying into the mud as the rain continued to pour around her.
------
Tsubame sat bolt upright, her covers clutched in her hands as tears ran down her face. Disoriented, she cast about her, looking for the path and Yahiko.
But there was no rain, the only moisture on her skin a light covering of sweat over her whole body.
Taking a deep breath, she stood, finally realizing she was back in her own room. Fear ate at her stomach, though, and she ran from the room, quickly getting into her sandals and rushing from the building.
She had to find Yahiko! She needed to make sure he was ok and fine and breathing.
------
Yahiko ran through the street, his feet kicking up dirt and dust. The wind was warm and felt nice against his flushed skin, but he disregarded everything, focusing only on his need to find Tsubame.
Turning left along the next street, he rushed past houses, then turned right. He was nearing the place she stayed at with Tae. Only another street, and two houses past the Akabeko, and then he would find her.
As he turned another left, he crashed into someone else running down the middle of the street. He caught hold of the person and managed to keep his balance, but he didn't have time for this.
"You ok?" He asked, more out of formality than any desire to know.
"…Yahiko-kun…?"
He stopped short and pulled back from the person. Tsubame's wide brown eyes were looking up at him from behind tear-soaked lashes. His breath caught in his throat, and then he crushed her to him as her arms snaked around his middle, hugging him close. They slowly collapsed to the road, huddled against each other.
"Oh gods, Tsubame! You're ok!"
He could feel her shaking against him, and heard her shuddering breath. "Yahiko-kun, I was so scared! I had to see you, because I thought you were…you had… I had a nightmare and you—"
"You what?" He pulled away a little, lifting her chin with his right hand. "What did you say?"
Fresh tears were coursing down her cheeks, and she hiccupped. "I had a nightmare… It was terrible! I saw you but couldn't get to you and then I was attacked by my old master's son and they hurt me and then I saw you and you tried to save me but I couldn't warn you about something and…and…" She broke down and buried her face in his chest, gripping his haori in her fists, as though holding onto him for dear life. "They killed you, Yahiko-kun! They shot you and you died and…and…and you hated me because all I did was stand there because I couldn't speak." She lifted her face, her eyes wild. "But I really did try to help you, Yahiko-kun! I tried to yell and call out to you but I couldn't and—"
He cut her off with a finger to her lips and a quiet, gentle shush. She bit her lip and he pulled her back against him, his left arm around her body and his right hand resting on the back of her head.
'Tsubame had a nightmare too? It sounds just like mine, only… Only she was the one to die in mine.' He leaned his head on the top of hers and placed a hesitant kiss into her hair. She stiffened slightly, but made no other move that he noticed.
"I had a nightmare, too…" he whispered, and she leaned her head up to look at him. He pulled his own head away a bit so he could look her in the eye. "I was looking for you, because I saw you but you hadn't seen me. When I finally found you again, you were…you were surrounded by a group of men and…and," he paused, his throat constricting tightly, "and I fought them off, but you weren't…"
She reached up and hand and placed the palm against his cheek, and he tilted his head into her touch.
"When I woke up, I had to see you, to make sure you were ok. The only thing I could think of were the things I said to you yesterday… I'm sorry for all of that. I didn't mean what I said, and I had no right to say any of it," he finally said softly. Her eyes widened, but then she smiled sadly.
"It's ok. I'm sorry for ignoring you all day today. I was just scared to see you… I couldn't get those words out of my head…"
"That's why I'm sorry!"
She shook her head and shushed him. "I know, and I know you didn't mean them. But I couldn't help thinking that maybe…you thought that way of me anyway…"
"No, never."
Her smile was painful. "Why can't I accept that then? What is wrong with me…?"
He took her hand from his cheek and held it in his own, and then lifted her chin with his other hand so that she was facing him, and he slowly lowered his own face to hers and placed a gentle kiss on her lips.
It wasn't a long kiss, but he made sure his feelings were in it. When he pulled away, she was staring at him with her large eyes.
"You're my Tsubame—I could never think badly of you. Never. I'm sorry for making you upset just because I was jealous of Yutarou," he cringed inwardly as that annoying voice gloated. Ignoring it, he pulled Tsubame up with him and dusted himself and her off. She blushed bright red, and so did he.
"C'mon, let me walk you home," he murmured, the tips of his ears red. She bit her lip and smiled shyly, but nodded. He took her hand in his, and she twined her fingers between his larger ones.
The trip back to her home was short, and he hated that it had to end.
"You can…" Tsubame began as she stood in the doorway, looking out at him, "you can come in. It's late, and I don't think Tae will object. We should have an extra room since one of the serving girls recently got married…"
Yahiko concealed his surprise, but nodded and took a step towards the door. "If you're sure it's ok?"
She nodded and entered the house, Yahiko not far behind. He followed her to the room she indicated, but paused before going in. She blushed and nudged him, and he finally agreed to enter, but he grabbed her hand at the last second and pulled her into the room with him.
"Stay with me…?" Her eyes widened and he shook his head. "Not like that! It's just…I'm still afraid I'm going to wake up and you won't be here…"
She bit her lip again—'If she doesn't stop, she's going to tear herself a hole,' Yahiko thought—and then nodded. "I was sort of hoping you might ask…"
Now Yahiko's eyes widened in surprise, but Tsubame ducked past him, pulling out two futons. She lay them down side by side, and then grabbed some covers and threw them on both futons. She pointed to the one on the right.
"You can have that one…"
He nodded and made his way to the bedding, the only light the moonlight that came in through a door leading to a terrace-type area, and lay down. Tsubame cuddled under the blankets on the futon beside him, and she smiled at him.
"Goodnight, Yahiko-kun. I'll see you in the morning…?"
He reached a hand over and brushed some hair out of her face. "Yeah. Goodnight, Tsubame."
She held his hand in her own as she smiled and closed her eyes slowly. Eventually, her breathing slowed to that of one asleep, but her smile never wavered, and she still held Yahiko's hand in her own.
Smiling himself, Yahiko leaned over and kissed her forehead, then settled back, his face turned towards hers.
'I think…I know what Kenshin meant now…' he thought dully, then sleep came to claim him, a smile on his face and Tsubame's small hand held protectively in his own.