Hindsight
week has passed since I caught Won Won coming down the stairs from the boys' dormitory with her. A week since I caused a scene in front of our fellow Gryffindors and accused them of sneaking around behind my back. I had given Won Won an ultimatum of me or her, certain that he would pick me and stop seeing her. How stupid of me.
Now I have to watch the cosy way they interact with each other, jokes that only they seem to understand, and the longing glances when they think the other is not looking. They both swear that nothing happened between them on the day that I broke up with Won Won but I don't really believe them. Even if nothing has happened yet, it is only a matter of time before it does.
I would love to hate Hermione Granger. I would love even more to say that she is a whore who has an obsession with Quidditch players and boys who are already taken, but deep down I know that this isn't true and that she was devastated when Won Won started dating me. As devastated as I am now. She is staring at me with a guilty look on her face as they are doing homework together. They are sat a little too close together considering they are 'just friends,' if you ask me. Yes, I would love to hate Hermione Granger.
As for my ex-boyfriend, you may ask. A little distance and many talks with Parvati have helped me come to terms with the fact that Won Won never really saw me as anything but a way to make Hermione jealous. Like any red-blooded male, he enjoyed our snogging sessions around Hogwarts, to begin with, but quickly got bored and missed his friendship with her. I believe the time that she wouldn't talk to him helped him acknowledge how he felt about her. The only reason we stayed together for as long as we did was because he was too much of a coward to end it with me so I had to do the dirty work for him. Isn't it amazing how much you can realise with hindsight once you are out of a situation? It doesn't stop it from hurting any less, though.
An icy cold stab of jealousy rushes through me as I watch them get up and leave the Gryffindor common room. Heading off to do their prefect rounds, I expect. I resist the urge to humiliate myself further by following them and spying. I can't stop the thoughts that invade my mind and make me think about what they may get up to whilst alone. Will he kiss her the way he used to kiss me? Will they sneak off to an empty classroom or broom cupboard like we did many times over the last six months?
A hand on my arm brings me out of my horrible thoughts. I turn to see Parvati sitting next to me with a concerned look on her face. "You do realise you have worn a hole through that parchment?" I look down at the table and see that I am pressing down so hard that the quill I have been writing with has indeed made a hole in the parchment. Luckily I had not made much of a start on my potions essay. I want to say it goes with the hole in my heart, but I am aware that is a little too dramatic and silly even for me.
Parvati is staring at me sympathetically. "You are much better off without him, Lavender. As the potions essay doesn't have to be in until Friday why don't we go up to the dorm and catch up on some gossip? I know that will make you feel better." I manage a weak smile and thank my lucky stars that I have a loyal best friend who knows me so well.
We get up and head towards the dorm. "I think that's the best idea you've had in ages," I tell her.
Parvati giggles cattily and whispers, "She may be the smartest girl in our year but did you see how her hair looked at the back? You are much prettier."
I don't intend to hold a grudge against Hermione and Ron (I must learn to stop calling him Won-Won) for long. In fact, I hope I will look back on this in years to come with no hard feelings. But for now I am going to bitch with my best friend until my heart mends and I feel much better.
"I have to agree," I whisper back with a catty giggle of my own.