Master Yi was fast, and he could only be an ally. It was too terrifying to think of what Yi could do as an enemy.
There were other reasons I was glad Yi was an ally; I started thinking Yi was unique a month after teaming with him. Sometimes, it was hard to keep up with Yi, with his habit of rushing, but we always managed to pull through. My Black Shield helped a lot; I always saved it for Yi, no matter how ill I was feeling, because that's how we came out of fights alive.
Strangely enough, I knew that I was safe with Yi.
I was his support, but he protected me. I knew that the enemies could only get at me if Yi was dead. I often caught Yi checking where I was from the corner of his eyes. It was weird, because he never stopped checking on me, even when there were plenty of other support champions around.
I understand keeping your support safe when there are only one or two of us left. But when backups come, with at least half a dozen support champions, it was a bit strange that Yi still stayed so tense, keeping a watchful eye on me.
I guess maybe, I mean something to him.
Initially, I thought I was overthinking things. And maybe, I am. But there are times I catch Yi glancing at me. These glances, I don't remember exactly when they started, because I've been in the war for a while. Maybe they began a month ago. During the war, I've lost track of the time and date; it's hard to remember these things when there are more urgent matters, like keeping my allies and I alive.
Yi used to look away whenever I noticed his gaze. But lately, he's been smiling back at me when I look back.
They were small smiles, but still.
Yi's smiles were able to calm the noises in my head at times, noises that haunted me after the day's battle had ended and I was still tense, waiting to hear the sound of approaching enemies. It took me a while to realize, but I think his smiles are good for me. I can't say why exactly, but I want to see him smile. It's something I look forward to.
The noises in my head are getting worse these days. These noises are anxious thoughts, worst case scenarios. Lost in the jungle, my mana depleted, a Warwick snarling at my heels. Or even worse, our team split, Yi and I cornered between four enemy champions and my Soul Shackles unavailable. I have to admit, there's a lot to be scared about; we could lose the war.
But at the end of the day, I was glad that Yi, and not anyone else, was there for me. I don't know what this all could mean, because we're at war and I don't have it in me. To be selfless. To love. To keep going, for someone else, when all I can think of is giving up.
I'll think about these things more deeply after the war ends. But then again… maybe I won't. Most times I don't want to think these thoughts, whatever they mean. These thoughts, I'm sure they need to be protected rather than probed, like a nexus on the edge of shattering.