HEROES : Get Your Kicks...
Set during the road trip of s1, Noah, Matt, and Ted make a pit stop and Matt has an unusual encounter. Or do he?
Definitely AU/XO. No slash, sorry.
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"I don't know about you guys, but I gotta take a massive whiz!"
Matt groaned. "Ted, we just passed an exit with a McDonalds like five minutes ago!"
"I didn't have to go then," he protested from the back seat. "And what was up with that rest stop in the middle of the highway? Buncha rednecks around here, man."
Matt and Noah shared a look, rolling their eyes once more at their caveman cohort. At least he wasn't singing The Proclaimers' "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" really loudly and really off-key. Again.
Matt glanced back to the road and noticed another sign indicating an exit was coming up. "What's that one say, Bennet?"
"We're coming up on the Jefferson City exit," he answered as they passed. "I don't know if there's a gas station there, but Jeff City is not anywhere near this part of Missouri. Must be the exit for one of the main arteries to there," he surmised.
"Fine, if there's a gas station or something, we'll stop, if not, I'll pull over at the next one. That okay with you, Ted?"
"Yeah, but hurry up, will ya?"
Matt rolled his eyes again. A minute later, they crested the hill and saw the exit. "Great," Matt grumbled, "nothing there, not even a gas station, but they've got an H-D dealership! Probably not any towns for a while down that exit, anyway."
"Well, there was just one not ten miles back, Parkman," Bennet explained. "Surely whoever planned these exits was planning for leisurely drives down Historic Route 66! They weren't going to put a gas station in every ten miles!"
"But what about back there with them caves Jesse James hid out in? Conestoga or whatever"
Noah sighed. "Onondaga Caves or Meramac Caverns? Tourist traps. Jesse was at Meramac, by the way. I'm sure 95 of the locals have never even been to them."
"And while you two were arguing, I passed the exit," Matt informed them.
"Matt, dude," Ted said, leaning forward. "Find someplace NOW! Pull over and I'll take a leak on the side of the road if I have to!"
"And when Highway Patrol comes along, I'm hauling ass and leaving you with your dick blowing in the wind, Ted!"
Blow my dick, Parkman!
"I heard that!"
"Good!"
Matt almost missed seeing the storage units on the other side of the highway. "Gotta be an outer road over the hill," he said nodding to them.
Noah motioned ahead. "Newer church and a non-access overpass, there's sure to be another exit coming up."
Matt didn't hear him. He had noticed a car in front of an open storage unit facing the interstate. Whoever it belonged to had stepped out as the trio passed and Matt could swear they locked eyes for a moment. He felt a tingle in the back of his head, but he was distracted by an 18-wheeler passing to try and focus on the guy. He shrugged it off as he saw a sign indicating another exit with gas and food.
"YES!" Ted shouted from the back. "Salvation is mine!"
Matt shook his head, chuckling, as he began slowing for the turn-off lane. He had to cross back over the interstate to get to any of the gas stations or restaurants. "Okay, where do we want to stop at?"
Noah made a quick scan of the highway signage as they crossed. "Blimpie subs and Domino's pizza at this truck station or BK attached to Phillips 66 or...looks like just a regular truck stop-gas station on this side?"
"Not pizza," Ted declared.
"I'm a bit tired of burgers, myself," Noah replied. "Subs, I can do." Matt nodded in agreement, hitting his blinker.
Matt turned left up the hill at the light and again into the gas station parking lot, but it was already evident that the Blimpie section was closed and cleaned out some time ago. Domino's sign was still lit up and there was a driver's car in front. "Wanna rethink pizza, or run across to burgers?"
"I'll get out right here if I have to, and believe me, I have to!"
Noah sighed. "I guess burgers."
Matt made a quick dive across the street between constant regular traffic mixed in with diesels all but ignoring the smaller vehicles. "Geez, I would hate to live with this mess all the time! How do people stand this?"
"Should've been here BEFORE they put in the traffic lights!"
"What?" Matt turned to Bennet.
"I didn't say anything," Noah replied. Ted shrugged and was out the door before Matt stopped the car. Noah and Matt shook their heads again as they got out.
"Don't bother waiting for me."
"What?" Matt stopped and looked around.
"What what?" Bennet asked.
"Did you just say something?"
"Just 'what what'?" he replied, curious.
Matt looked around, but didn't see anyone else looking at him except a kid in the car at the drive-thru window. Couldn't have been him, he thought before shrugging his shoulders and following Bennet into the restaurant.
"I think Ted had the right idea, I'm going to hit the head, too," Noah told him.
"Right behind ya," Matt teased. Noah stopped, turned to Matt, and rolled his eyes again before weaving his way through the dining room to the bathroom.
Matt fought a laugh, "what?" The rude jokes they kept telling to break up the boredom of the road had them all thinking dirty at the slightest provocation.
Noah stopped inside the door, noting how small the room was.
"Hey! A little privacy?" Ted called over his shoulder from the cramped confines of the small urinal squeezed next to the sink almost as an afterthought.
Noah started to open the stall door.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you!" Ted warned. Matt stood in the open bathroom doorway himself and could swear he heard someone else say that at the same time behind him. He looked back down the small hall to see no one.
Noah, meanwhile had opened and quickly shut the stall door. Matt turned back to see a look of horror on his face.
"That bad, huh?"
"Told you so," came Ted and the echo.
Matt looked back down the empty hall. He would have to wait a minute for his turn anyway, so he decided to casually stroll back out and check the place for this mystery voice. No one on the BK side was paying any attention to him, and the few people on the gas station side weren't even close enough to realize anyone had gone into the bathroom. Matt scratched his head and leaned against the hallway wall, waiting his turn.
Ted came out a minute later and asked if he'd ordered yet. "No, just waiting on you guys to finish," Matt told him as he heard Bennet flush the urinal inside.
Matt reentered the bathroom, hand already reaching for his zipper. "Damn, didn't realize I had to go, too, until Ted said something," he told Noah.
Noah, turning off the faucet, gave him a sideways glance and a non-committal "hmph." Matt ignored it. He knew from 11 years on the Force guys checked each other out in the locker rooms, and this wasn't the first time Bennet had seen him. (That he could remember, at least. Bennet had already admitted his part in Matt's examination, but they had let bygones be bygones for now.)
"Did you want me to get you something, Matt?" he asked as he opened the door.
"Nah, I'll be out in a minute."
Matt heard the door close behind him. He was suddenly caught off guard by movement to his left. Someone had come in when Bennet left and opened the stall door. He snorted and sighed. "Figgers. Every single time."
"No one takes care of this place?" Matt asked, zipping up.
"'p'rntly not, man," he mumbled.
Matt wasn't sure if he said 'man' or 'Matt' and did a double take as he stepped to his right to the sink. He tried to ignore it as the guy glanced at him before he pulled down his shorts enough to take a leak, as he had no fly on them. Matt also noticed he had to take a moment to readjust his headphones behind his head so the line wouldn't get splashed. Said line lead to the guy's t-shirt pocket. Must be an iPod, Matt mused, even though the headphones weren't those annoying iPod earplugs, but the classic style associated with Walkman-type headsets.
"Like what you see, Parkman?"
Matt stopped washing his hands and looked over at the guy. He was staring straight ahead, trying to ignore Matt.
"I'm sorry, did you say something?"
The guy gave Matt a sideways glance, shook his head, looked down at himself.
Matt turned off the faucet and dried his hands before making a hasty exit. Joining his friends in line, he whispered, "You two weren't messing with me in there, were you?"
"You're too weird, dude," Ted said as he studied the menu.
"Says the guy with the ability to go nuclear if he sneezes," Matt shot back.
Ted gave him a dirty look over his shoulder as he stepped forward to order. "We all on one ticket, guys?"
"Does anyone else have any money?" Noah asked sarcastically for what seemed like the twentieth time in their journey. Setting up that fake account as 'Noah Butler' came in handy on occasion, like now, and Noah hoped these two appreciated it more than they let on.
As Noah stepped up to order, Matt noticed the bearded man entered the line behind him. They nodded to each other before turning their attentions back to the menu. Matt noticed the guy smelled musty and sweaty. He hadn't noticed it in the bathroom from the, ahem, 'odor' coming from the stall, but it was evident here.
"You don't smell so fresh yourself, Parkman." Matt glanced back at the man. "I've been digging through storage unit all afternoon, it gets hot in there, even on this cool day."
The man never opened his mouth. He glanced at Matt and Matt turned back to the menu as Noah stepped aside and motioned to Matt to order. Distracted, he took a second to regain his thoughts before ordering. Noah gave him a strange look as he paid the cashier. Matt stepped around him to fill his cup at the end of the counter.
The bearded guy quickly ordered, paid, and joined the trio at the end of the counter to wait for his food. A quick motion to his shirt pocket and they could hear the tinny sound of music out of the guy's headphones.
When they finally sat down in the corner booth ("Fast food, my ass", Ted complained, getting nods of agreement from Matt and Noah and an amused smile from the other guy.), Noah and Ted made note of the classic "Route 66" memorabilia on the walls, while Matt kept a watchful eye on the bearded stranger.
He was slightly younger then he and Ted, maybe mid-30's, Matt guessed, his beard seemed to throw off his age, somehow. His demeanor was casual, but Matt could tell he was aware of being watched. He wore straps on his forearms, glasses, and that scraggly beard, just slightly thicker than Ted's. Matt thought he had a slight stagger to his walk, as well. Injury? He sat in a booth by the window alongside the drive-thru to eat and seemed to watch the passing traffic as he tuned out everything but his iPod.
"You gonna stare or eat, Parkman?"
"Huh, what?" Matt was caught off guard again.
Noah quietly asked again, "You going to eat or stare at that guy all day, Parkman?"
"Uh, yeah, eat," Matt sighed, slightly blushing at being so obvious. Some detective you are, Parkman, he thought to himself.
Ted leaned forward, Matt's got a boyfriend!
"I do not!" he quietly shot back. A mildly surprised Bennet raised an eyebrow at them as he shoved French fries in his mouth.
"Don't worry, so much, Matt. Unclench."
"Yeah, right," Matt muttered as he bit into his sandwich.
"Yeah, right, what?" Noah asked him, glancing between the two men.
Matt looked up, glancing between them. "Who just told me to unclench?" he asked, mouth full.
They both shook their heads. Matt glanced across at the other man, who was ignoring everything around him, wasn't he?
"Keep it up, Parkman, you'll drive yourself crazy."
Matt glanced back to his companions. Neither had said a word.
"Matt? Something you need to tell us?" Noah inquired.
Matt glanced back to the other guy again. He cast a look at Matt, quickly raised an eyebrow. Matt shook his head. "No, nothing going on here. Just us crazies."
"Eat, so we can get back on the road," Noah ordered.
"Yes, mother," Matt shot back, taking another bite of his sandwich. He glanced back to the other man.
"We're full up on crazy, here, Matt," he winked, but didn't move his mouth, aside from chewing. "I find the music tends to drown out most of the background noise, for the most part, that is."
Matt stared at the man. He took a drink from his cup and made a quick salute at Matt with it. "Holy shit," Matt thought, "I'm having an actual telepathic conversation!"
"Want a parade?" the man 'said' as he looked back out the window.
"How long--?" Matt asked, taking a bite of French fries.
The man smirked. "Always. But it tends to follow quantum theory. When I want them they won't work. When I don't? Headaches. I've found very few people who don't give me headaches." He smirked, Matt could tell he was thinking of one n particular. He continued, "usually just by being near them. I have to throw up mental 'shields' if I even shake someone's hand. Imagine brick walls, white noise, y'know?"
"You must be very lonely?" Matt thought.
The man gave him a sad smile as he took another drink. "You don't know the half of it. Try imagine keeping yourself from being lost in Janice the next time you--oh, sorry. Maybe not. Remember when you were last with Janice? Remember it was kind of like a freefall through her mind?"
Matt was defensive about this, how had he known who Janice was, much less--? "Not really, just tried to go with the flow of her thoughts."
"Alright, then, imagine that thought flow as a mighty river. Glance down when you cross the Mississippi later, and try to imagine yourself drowning in that river."
Matt nodded as he took another bite.
The man continued, "and that's just a handshake or unguarded bump into someone."
Matt looked at him, slightly confused. Weren't they just talking about what it was like for him to--?
"Now imagine letting yourself drown in that river, that's what it's like for me," he thought. "And people wonder why I don't get out much!" he laughed sarcastically at this, but Matt could also hear/feel the sadness/loneliness in it.
"Whoa," Matt thought, "sorry, dude."
The man wiped his mouth, quietly burped, and took another swig of soda. "Don't be, after all I live with it everyday," he mused in a sing-song thought. He stood up, taking his cup off his tray, and emptied the tray into the trash. "You, on the other hand, Matt," he began refilling his soda, "get to go out and have some wild times ahead." He winked.
"Wild times? What are you talking about?"
The man glanced at Noah, smirked, then at Ted. A somber darkness seemed to come over his thoughts. Both men knew something was up, but didn't know what, exactly. Noah had an idea, though. He looked back to Matt. "Watch your back, Matt, and think happy thoughts."
"Wait, what?" Matt asked out loud. "Where are you going?"
The man gave Matt a sideways look as he crossed the room to leave. "Not with you, our paths merely crossed for a moment, and you have a destiny to fulfill elsewhere, Matt Parkman." He nodded to Matt as he backed out the door.
Matt thought after him, "Where can I find you? Will we meet again?"
He stopped and gave Matt a scrutinizing look. "Let the chips fall where they may, Matt. You be sure and look after her for me, alright?" He left the restaurant and Matt then realized he had seen the man's car earlier at the storage unit. "And stop worrying so much!"
"Her?" Matt said out loud. "Her who? Wait!" he started to leave, but Bennet grabbed his the back of his jacket.
"Matt, what are you doing?" he asked, pulling Matt back down beside him.
"That guy!" Matt motioned to the man pulling out of the parking lot. "We've got to go after him! He's one of us!"
The man looked back over his shoulder. "No, Matt, I told you, you have a destiny somewhere else."
"But--"
"Sorry, Matt, I can't share any of the answers you seek or need, right now. We have to figure those out for ourselves."
"You can't tell me anything more?"
The man pulled out, heading south and away from the trio in the restaurant. "Believe in yourself, and be brave for what's to come, Matt. People believe in you and you must believe in yourself."
Matt suddenly felt a heavy pressure on his skull, like someone was trying to cram an ocean into a thimble.
"Matt?" Noah asked, shaking his shoulder. "You spaced out there for a second, you okay?"
"What?" Matt asked as if he had just woken up. "Bennet? What--? Where--?"
"At some rinky-dink bump-in-the-road joint, are you done eating?"
Matt looked down at his half eaten meal. "Yes? No? I don't know?" Ted reached across to finish Matt's fries. "Wasn't there just a guy over there who--?" Matt stopped, everything seemed different, somehow. He looked around the diner. "Weren't we just at a Burger King?"
"What?" Noah asked. "We haven't stopped at a Burger King since Tulsa."
"Tulsa? What about that place in Missouri, right before we got into St. Louis? Past Jeff City exit?"
"You still mad at me stopping you from calling Janet?"
"Janice," Matt corrected him, rubbing his temple.
"You feeling alright, Parkman?" Ted asked.
Matt felt very out of place. "N-not really. Where are we?"
"Central Illinois, I think," Noah answered, raising an eyebrow.
A heavyset woman in a gaudy chicken and egg apron approached. "You're in Lanford, boil on the ass that is America," she told them, dropping off their check.
Lanford? That name sounded vaguely familiar to Matt.
A large man suddenly walked in the door, distracting Matt for a moment.
"Hey, Rose, got our lunches ready?" he asked the woman.
She gave him a dirty look, sighed, and replied. "Yeah, yeah, just a minute. JACKIE! Dan's here for the garage lunches!" she yelled out, crossing behind the counter.
Matt winced as her thoughts momentarily overpowered his. Yow!
Noah leaned forward, whispering, "Yikes! I'd hate to be her husband!" Ted grimaced in agreement.
Matt glanced over at the large man she called Dan. He was glancing around the restaurant at the handful of customers as he tapped his fingers to a mystery bluesy song Matt couldn't place. He caught Matt's eye, nodded, then turned back to the counter.
"That's him," Matt nodded in his direction.
Noah popped his eyes in amazement and slid a twenty to Matt. "Here, you pay the bill!"
"What'd I do?" Matt protested before grabbing the money and bill and getting up. He rose to fast and experienced a moment of vertigo. He shook it off and stumbled to the counter, plopping down on the stool next to this large man, Dan.
"Whoa, you okay there, buddy?" Dan asked.
Matt slid the money toward a prissy blond man. "Yeah, just a headache. Threw me off for a second there." He rubbed his forehead.
"You're not from around here, are you?" Dan asked.
"Naw, I'm from LA," Matt answered. "We're headed from Texas to New York."
"Bicoastal?" Dan joked.
Before Matt could answer, the blond man chimed in. "Bi? You guys are bi?" he sounded very happy to hear this.
"Down, Leon!" Dan warned him.
Matt stared at this Leon for a second. The thoughts were...well, not what Matt really wanted to think about. He started to blush at what he was 'hearing'.
He quickly held up his hand, flashing his ring. "Sorry, I'm married, got one on the way!"
"Congratulations, buddy!" Dan clapped him on the shoulder. "Darn, guess we can't set you up with my lesbian sister-in-law!" he teased the mousy woman who had just came out of the back room and shot him a questioning, yet dirty look alongside Rose's own dirty look. He grimaced and turned back to Matt. "So," he clapped Matt's shoulder again. "First time?"
Matt grinned, "yeah, I can't wait!"
Dan nodded toward Rose, "Yeah, we've got four, ourselves, and three grandkids, now. Don't worry, it gets easier with time!" he laughed. "Not like they're gonna kill ya, right?" he guffawed.
Matt chuckled, "thanks," but got the impression it was a slam at 'Rose' (Rosie? Roseanne?) for something. She had a dark mood to her thoughts, at his comment, but Matt couldn't help but pick up the thoughts of Dan, something about a story she wrote and how he had had a heart attack (?-cardiac infarction?), she wrote that he cheated? Or died? but how could he if he was sitting right here? Matt was slightly confused and decided it was time to leave.
"Well, we better get going," he nodded to his companions who were already up and heading out.
"Yeah, man," Dan said, offering his hand, "have a good trip and good luck with the baby."
Matt's hand was dwarfed by Dan's, but he shook it firmly. He thanked Dan again and headed out.
Once in the car, Ted spoke up. "Was that guy trying to pick you up, Matt?"
"Dan? Naw," he chuckled. "But Leon was wanting you, Sprague. Hoo-boy!"
Ted didn't have a comeback for that as Noah pulled out of the Lunchbox parking lot. He and Matt shared a grin at this. "Game on!" Noah shouted as he took off.
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characters of Matt Parkman, Noah "HRG" Bennet, and Ted Sprague are the intellectual property of Tim Kring.
characters of Roseanne Conner, Dan Conner, Jackie Harris, and Leon Carp property of Carsey-Werner.