Who We Are, A Victorious Oneshot
By LovingLizForever
A/N: Hello guys! Yes, I am writing yet another oneshot, because this is for a challenge on the Topaz awards, and I'm so excited to write it! I'm trying to improve my writing, and it IS tough, but I'm still young right? Oh, and I'm sorry that I'm not updating my stories. I've got exams coming up and I've been really busy. But the good news is that they'll be over on Thursday, so expect updates around Saturday/Sunday, depends how busy I am! Anyways, enjoy!
Disclaimer: In case I haven't ranted about this yet, I still don't own Victorious. This annoying guy called Dan does. I also don't own the song lyrics that are posted at the end, happy?
Pairing: Tori and Jade
Quote: "The loneliest moment in someone's life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly."
Secrets. Secrets are things that are never supposed to be revealed right? They're precious to you, something that you can call your own. They can stay inside you for years, ripping at your soul, tearing away at your conscience. You could be one of those lucky people, who hide their secrets so well, that they die with the secret.
Or you could be unlucky ones, who remember their secret every day. The secret will haunt them for the rest of their lives, until finally they blurt it out to someone. The reaction depends entirely on the secret, and whoever it was you told, but more or likely, the person will be shocked.
So what if Tori Vega had secrets? Not small secrets that pretty much everyone knew anyway. But a big, deep secret.
She had known since the day that she turned seven. Tori was sat in the middle of a circle, grinning happily like a happy seven year old, opening her presents one by one. As she thanked one of her classmates for a new bubble machine; Tori noticed her parents, weary eyed and pale, standing at the door.
One look at her mother's face warned Tori that something was wrong. Something had happened. Tori placed her present down on the carpet, with shaking hands, as her happy smile faded from her face.
Although Tori was only seven, she was a pretty smart kid, and she knew that she had to find out what had happened. Seeing her parents so…dead made Tori shudder, she hated it.
Her friends were still sat down, staring at Tori expectantly, each begging for her to open their present.
"What's the matter Tori?" One girl who was opposite Tori asked, pushing her glasses from the bottom of her nose to the top, staring thoughtfully at the brunette.
Tori looked at her friends, forcing a weak smile on her face. "Nothing-" She assured them, looking away from her parents, who had now turned away from her and walked out of the room.
She stood up quickly, her eyes pressed on her parents. She couldn't let them leave. Something was wrong, she could feel it. And she, Tori Vega was going to find out.
…
Jade West brushed her thick black hair over her shoulders, looking up into the sun. It was around 40 degrees Celsius, and she was boiling hot.
Thank goodness I don't sweat she thought with a confident smirk on her face. She could feel her boyfriend's hands around her waist, sheltering her. She usually loved it when he did that, but now it made her feel even more hot.
She was sat outside in the black box theatre, listening to her teacher Miss Williams talk on and on about stage effects. Honestly, this had to be worse than Robbie's lessons. And those were pretty bad.
"Lighting is very important in a play, any idea's why?" Miss Williams said, her sharp eyes scanning the class, who were either paying full attention, or falling asleep.
The teacher pointed to Cat, who was waving her hands around, trying to be chosen, "Okay, Cat, tell us why."
Cat giggled, letting her red hair fall over her shoulders onto her chest. "Okie dokie! We need to have lighting because otherwise no one will be able to see!" Cat burst out into laughter, while everyone stared at each other blankly.
"Little red, I don't think that's the answer." Andre said simply, his eyebrows raised in amusement.
Just as Miss Williams was about to say anything, the bell went off, signalling the end of the lesson. Jade sighed in relief; the lesson had taken way too long for her liking, especially in the black box theatre.
As she walked out, with Beck by her side, she heard the faint sound of crying. She frowned, trying to work out where it was coming from. Not that she cared.
"What's that noise?" Jade asked Beck, looking around curiously.
Beck looked at her dumbly, "I can't hear anything." He said, shrugging.
Jade shrugged in defeat, "C'mon, let's go underneath the bleachers, we haven't had alone time is ages."
Beck grinned, "Do you like our alone time Jade?"
"Yes. It's a time where we can finally get away from Vega and all the rest of them." Jade replied, as they reached her locker. She opened it, shoving her books in.
Beck smirked arrogantly, "I like those guys, you should give them a chance."
"I'd rather chew my own hair." Jade said sarcastically, slamming her locker shut in disgust. Getting to know them guys was like...Asking to be mentally scarred for life.
Beck wrapped his arm around Jade's shoulder again, "And this is the girl I fell in love with."
…
However happy Tori may have been on the outside, on the inside, she was dying. The secret she had found out all those years ago was always on her mind, she could never get rid of it. She could still remember the shame, the disappointment, the disgust.
Tori was dragged out of her thoughts by her mobile, that started to buzz repetitively. She scrambled into her bag hurriedly, looking curiously at the caller.
It was her mom.
Tori sighed in irritation, why did they always have to bug her? Every single day. Ever since Tori had started Hollywood Arts, she had pretended to love her parents so that no one would suspect anything. But secretly, she loathed them. She hated them with a pure hatred.
"What?" Tori hissed quickly, placing her mobile to her ear.
There was a pause down the other end before she heard the sound of her mother's shaky voice, "Tori dear, we've had some bad news…"
"What is it?" Tori's heart started thumping against her chest. The last time she had been given bad news was on her 7th birthday, what if that happened again? She doubted she would be strong enough this time to get through it.
Another pause, "Darling, we know your secret."
Tori froze, her eyes widening in shock. What? What secret? What secret did they know?
"What do you mean?" Tori asked, shock written across her face.
Mrs Vega laughed bitterly, "We know that you know about us. About your father and I. And we're ready to talk to you." Tori sighed. She couldn't take it in. The secret she had spent so long keeping; was now found out.
You see, after her party, ten whole years ago, Tori had crept up to her mom's bedroom. She had stayed outside the door, listening. At first, all she could hear was muffled whispers, and then she heard it. She heard the truth.
"You never cared how I felt did you? How did it feel when you slept with her? Was it exciting? Was it enjoyable? How old was she? Younger than me? Better than me? Do you have any idea how much I gave up for you…And now you've gone and cheated on me." Her mother shouted.
"Yes, she was younger than you! A lot younger, and so much prettier and sexier and better than you!" Mr Vega shouted back, his face red with fury.
Mrs Vega laughed bitterly, as she sunk down on the bed, "I guess we're even now, aren't we?"
Mr Vega nodded sadly, "I guess we are. I'm sorry Chlo-"
"I don't want to hear it. Tori can never find out about this, she can't find out that you aren't her father. Do you understand?" Mrs Vega said firmly.
"Yes, I do."
And now it was out. They knew that she was there, listening, judging. How did they find out? How did they know?
"How did you-"Tori stuttered quietly, before she was interrupted.
"You shouldn't leave your diary lying around," Mrs Vega said harshly, "You never know who could read it."
Tori felt tears in her eyes, "You read my diary?" She gasped. Her body couldn't move. She couldn't understand this. This was too much.
"Well, not all of it, it was so boring. You kept whining through most of it. But I did find out some useful information-"
"Not the one about me being gay-"
"Being a lesbian? Yes, we read that." Mrs Vega said simply. Tori collapsed to the floor, tears streaming from her eyes.
The classroom she was in was getting colder and colder, but she stayed rooted to the floor, her legs wobbly and unstable.
"What do you think-"Tori asked slowly…
There was another laugh, "What do you think? You act like you're all perfect Tori Vega, always looking down on your dad and I. But actually, you're just a common little dyke."
Tori bit her lip, more tears streaming down her face, "Mom-"
"No Tori, don't try and explain your sins to us. We want you out of our house, don't come home tonight. People like you don't deserve a home." Mrs Vega snapped sharply.
"Please don't kick me out-"She sobbed.
There was a long, painful silence, "You brought this on yourself."
Tori's eyes widened. What was happening?
The only thing that she knew for certain, was that this was ALL her fault.
…
The thing that Tori didn't know was that on that day that changed her life; for the worse she believed, Jade was there. Jade had been outside the classroom, listening to every word. Although Jade couldn't hear Mrs Vega, she pretty much got the jist of what had happened.
At first, Jade was shocked. She had no idea that Tori was a lesbian. It kind of shocked and confused Jade. A lesbian? Tori? Never.
But she was.
The reason that Jade was there in the first place was because she couldn't help herself. She had heard the crying, gotten curious, and gone to find out who it was. But now she regretted it.
How was she supposed to feel?
She wasn't homophobic, but Tori Vega? The perfect Tori Vega? Jade scrambled up to her feat, brushing some dirt of her jeans wearily. What was she supposed to do now?
Should she offer a home to Tori? After all, Tori now had nowhere to go. But if Tori met her father- No, Tori could not meet Jade's father. That was certain. But where would Tori go? Although Jade hated Tori, she couldn't help but feel terrible. Or did she hate Tori?
Yes, she did.
No, she didn't.
Jade sighed, and looked at her watch, and gasped. She had been standing there, debating with herself for the last half an hour. Beck would be looking for her, Jade knew he would be!
But what hurt Jade the most was that she was watching Tori's world fall apart, and she had no idea what to do to help her. She could just watch, blankly.
With a scowl on her face, and wearing a determined expression, Jade returned outside to Beck. Tori would have to figure this out by herself.
….
"Hey Beck." Jade greeted, slipping into the seat beside Beck, feeling the heat on her back already. There was no sign of Tori on the table.
Beck grinned, pushing a salad towards Jade, "Hey babe, I got this for you."
Jade looked at it blankly, "A salad?" She questioned.
"Yeah, you told me you were watching your weight…?" Beck said, his smile not faltering.
Jade's eyes narrowed dangerously, "You think I'm fat?" She said, a tint of anger in her voice. Everyone on the table was now silent, listening to this argument. Some people were even secretly recording it; they could use this against Jade later.
Beck's eyes widened, "You're being ridiculous, I never said that-"
"But you think I need to watch my weight, don't you?" She asked, rustling around in her pocket's for her prized possession.
"No-"
Jade's hands fell on her scissors, and she brought them out angrily, pointing them directly at Beck. By now, everyone was looking, recording it.
Not like Jade cared.
One of Jade's eyebrows rose, "You know what? Forget it." She said simply, and everyone gasped. Since when did Jade West admit defeat?
Beck eyed her suspiciously, something was wrong, "What's wrong babe?" He asked her.
"Nothing." She replied shortly, stabbing her lettuce with a fork.
Beck sighed, giving up already. If Jade wanted to tell him, she would in her own time.
….
An hour later, Tori Vega was walking down the corridors towards her locker. She had no idea what she was supposed to do. Should she tell anyone?
She was about to open the locker, when she felt a small tap on her shoulder. She turned quickly, alarmed at the sudden touch.
It was Amelia, Jess and Sophie. They were well known around the school for the school bullies. Everyone was scared of them. They bullied anyone they could. What did they want with her? Honestly, she wasn't in the mood.
"Hey Tori!" Jess snarled evilly, her blue eyes sparkling dangerously, as she rested against the lockers.
Tori pushed some books into her locker angrily, "Uh hey?" She mumbled.
Amelia pouted her lips, showing off her cherry lip-gloss, "So, some little birdy called Sinjin told us that you're a dyke, with a capital D."
"So we thought, to save you the trouble, we'd tell the whole school." Sophie laughed, taking a step towards Tori.
Amelia, who was the meanest of them all smirked, "We're so nice aren't we?"
"Of course we are." Jess giggled, smirking dangerously.
Tori collapsed against the locker, tears springing into her eyes. The girls burst out into giggles before walking off in a different direction.
Tori could already feel every single pair of eyes on her already. Everybody knew. Everybody knew who she was now. She could hear people whispering, laughing, judging, hating.
And that's when her world went black, and she collapsed into darkness.
…
Tori didn't know where she was. She was in a bar. It was really hot and stuffy, and she felt like she couldn't breathe.
Where was she?
She could see drunk women all around her, kissing, dancing, laughing, drinking wine, having fun. Why was she here?
She spotted Cat stood by the door, and Tori ran over to Cat in relief. When she reached the red head, she smiled thankfully.
"Where am I?" Tori asked thoughtfully.
Cat's expression changed, into a hard and cold one, "Get away from me, you freak!" Cat screamed, before running away.
And then she could hear silence, before she heard another voice, and then another, until all she could hear were voices, shouting at her, screaming.
"I always knew that you weren't perfect Vega, I told everyone that you were trouble. And now I've proved it. Stay away from us; go to the gay section, where you belong." That was Jade, but it sounded so foreign. So different.
And then there was a different voice, "I thought we were meant to be together, Tori? We were supposed to get married, and have cute babies. I even made a ship name for us together, Rori! And now we can't." That was most definitely Robbie.
"We were supposed to be friends! We were supposed to make records together Tori. But no one would buy records from a talentless dyke." Andre. But it wasn't anything like Andre. Andre wouldn't say that would he? This didn't feel real. It felt horrible, a world where nothing was certain. Everything was one big mistake.
…
"Tori are you dead?"
"Vega? Stop being such a baby and wake up."
"Jade, don't be so horrible!"
"Yo Tori? How you doing in there?"
"She's dead, isn't she?"
"Yes, she is."
"Jade! She's not dead, she's just in a deep sleep!"
Tori could hear voices all around her. She wondered where she was. Was she dead? She didn't feel dead.
"She's moving oh my gosh!" She could hear Cat squeal. Was this a dream again? Some horrible, twisted dream?
"Where…am I-" Tori asked weakly, with her eyes still firmly shut. She didn't know where she was, but she didn't want to know. She could remember everything that had happened. Everybody knew.
She could feel a pair of warm hands flung around her, pulling her into a hug, "You're not dead!" Cat squealed happily.
Tori slowly opened her eyes, her curiosity taking over. She was in a hospital, and everyone was around her. Andre, Cat, Robbie, Rex, Beck…And Jade.
Jade was so close to Tori, yet she seemed like another planet. Her expression was unreadable, and she was staring into space.
No one seemed to be judging Tori, everyone just seemed…normal. Maybe they hadn't found out yet? Maybe they didn't know?
Andre was grinning from cheek to cheek, "You're in hospital, you've been in here for the last day."
Tori nodded slowly, trying to take it in.
"We thought you had died!" Cat said finally ending the hug, and moving away from the bed.
"Yeah well she obviously isn't." Jade said simply, looking directly at Tori.
Tori sighed, feeling her cheeks go red in embarrassment. Why was Jade even here? Tori thought Jade hated her?
The next few hours went slowly for Tori, with tons of doctors' visits and even more visits from the gang and a few random people from school. Her parents hadn't showed up once. They didn't care.
Tori tried to pretend that everything was okay. But it wasn't. No one had mentioned anything about the reason why she was in the hospital in the first place.
And then, just as everyone was leaving, Jade walked in, a serious expression on her face. She took a seat beside Tori's bed, and looked at her hands.
"Listen Vega…" Jade started, and Tori gulped, what was Jade going to say? "I uhm…I was there when you were on the phone to that bitc- I mean, to your mom."
Tori sighed, this was all that she wanted, "Okay…"
"And if you really want to move in with me, then uhm…Just tell me, and you can." Jade's voice was wobbly, Tori could tell. She had never seen Jade like this before, Jade was usually so mean and cold, but now all Tori could see was kindness. Not that Jade would ever admit that.
Tori smiled a little, "Thanks, Jade."
Jade smirked, "Yeah well don't get used to this." Jade then reached out, and took Tori's hand and squeezed it, "Just know that I'm here. Okay?"
…
Secrets. Secrets are things that are never supposed to be revealed right? Well, Tori Vega had a few secrets, and in the prospect of half an hour, they were all revealed. Her first secret was that she had known all along that her father wasn't her real father. She had known since her seventh birthday. Maybe that secret wasn't as bad as she thought, because now, a year later, she wanted nothing to do with her father.
I said remember this moment
The next secret was who she was. A lesbian. That's just who she was. She couldn't deny it anymore, not now that the whole school knew. A lot of boys just got on with that secret, and accepted the fact that Tori Vega wasn't available to date anymore. Yes, there were a few people who judged her, and bullied her, but she had a lot of support on her side. She had her friends. She had Sikowitz, who had declared that anyone who made fun of Tori had to have a detention with him. And then Tori had Jade, who threatened to kill anyone who laid a finger on Tori.
In the back of my mind
Tori had decided to move in with Andre, because although Jade's offer was kind, she was still kind of scared of Jade's father. Jade's father reminded Tori of her parents. And she wanted to forget them.
That time we stood with our shaking hands
"You ready Vega?" Jade ran up to Tori, a carefree expression on her face. Tori smiled, for the four thousandth time that year, and nodded excitedly.
They were both wearing similar outfits, much to Jade's irritation. Tori's was a tight red dress, with a few tiny sequins spread across it, making her feel like a princess, whereas Jade's was a black dress, that instead of being tight, became puffy at the bottom.
Tori looked at the stage, an expression full of fear, but determination, she was going to do this. She was going to perform, with Jade, in front of all of Hollywood.
This was more than just a school performance. This was real.
This was freaking real.
Tori looked at Jade, "As ready as I'll ever be."
And it was the truth. Tori couldn't be more ready. A year had gone, a whole year since the school found out.
Jade smirked, grabbing Tori's hand, before dragging her up onto the stage, in front of the crowd. The lights shone on their faces, making it impossible to see the crowd.
But Tori wasn't afraid. She could do this. Jade was still holding her hand tightly, protecting her from whatever trouble came.
The crowd in stands went wild
The music started, led by Andre and the band, and then they started to sing. Their voices filled up the silent concert hall, like a magical prayer.
No one had heard anything like Tori and Jade before. They weren't like anyone else that they had ever heard. They didn't have a voice like any of the fake pop stars nowadays. They were unique. New, fresh.
Long live the walls we crashed through
All the kingdom lights shined, just for me and you.
And as Tori and Jade looked into each other's eyes, they knew something special had been made. A friendship that couldn't be broken. They weren't the happiest friends, and they certainly weren't perfect. But who wanted perfect?
Who wanted a life where everything you did had to be the best?
I was screaming long live
They didn't.
Maybe telling someone you're secret is unlucky? Maybe being forced out of the closet in front of the whole school isn't the best thing to happen?
All the magic we made
But hand in hand, Tori and Jade knew that whatever happened, they'd have each other.
And that's all they needed.
And bring on all the pretenders,
One day,
As the crowd erupted into applause, Jade walked across the stage towards Tori, and smirked, "Jesus Vega, why do I always have to be better than you?" She said teasingly.
We will be remembered.
…
A/N: I'm really not sure how that was…Honestly, I think it's terrible and I rambled on way too much. I'm so sorry if this was terrible! And this is what happens when I have some spare time…Like I said at the start, I've got exams coming up, so I won't be able to update that much. So uhm…yeah? Please review, which would be super, super awesome! I just want to thank EVERYONE who has supported me recently, you're all fab!
Signing off,
Anna (LovingLizForever)