Because Sorkin is making me lose it.
This is the story of Nina's portable hard drive…it backs files up in case your computer crashes.
I am shameless. I make no apology.
All the character's belong to the teasing, frustrating genuis who is Mr. Aaron Sorkin.
"So that just about wraps things up for now. I want the graphics sorted by five, so Maggie and Tess, have all the taglines sorted before then." Mac took a breath and looked up as she closed her notebook. Just another day in the newsroom. "Apart from that the show tonight is looking good, great work everyone, I'll see back here at six for the final rundown. Any problems before then, you know the drill."
Everyone began to stack their notes and laptops together, when Jennifer knocked at the glass door.
"Hey, Mac? There's someone here to see you. I – I didn't really know what to do with her so I told her to wait in your office." She looked nervous, as though scared she had done something wrong. Mac frowned as everyone froze to see what would happen.
"Can you say who it is?" Jennifer bit her lip, shooting glances at Charlie and at Will before turning back to Mackenzie.
"I don't – it's Nina Howard." No one moved. "The journalist from TMI?"
Mackenzie was stumped. What the hell did Nina Howard want with her? She was fairly certain that she couldn't have dug anything up on her. She'd been sure to cover her bases after the last confrontation with the gossip columnist, and she could not think of anything that had happened since which would be cause for gossip. Then again, she and Nina Howard had wildly different standards about what was newsworthy and what was not.
"Jennifer," Will started, in an annoyed but wary tone, "That woman is not a journalist. She is a gossip columnist. She is not you. You are way, way, way above her standards. Don't ever get confused about that, okay?"
Jesus Will. Do you know what you are doing to me right now, Mac thought.
"You did the right thing Jen. I'll be through in a sec, 'kay?" Mac smiled reassuringly at her, and the intern backed out of the conference room and headed back to her desk. Everyone was staring at Mac.
"Want some company?" Will asked, looking concerned.
"No, I got this." Mac told him. He held her gaze for moment to check she really was okay, and then led the way out of the room. Mac went last with Charlie who grabbed her elbow, making her turn.
"If you're not done in five minutes, I'm coming in there."
"Ten." Mac compromised. After a moment clearly trying to decide whether this was an argument he would win, he nodded. To be honest, she was nowhere near as confident as she was pretending to be. The woman had caused nothing but trouble for Mac and the News Night team. On the other hand, she was determined to get one over on Nina, even if it was just a small slice of revenge; it would still feel good.
She straightened her back and lifted her chin, setting her sights on her office door before striding towards it.
"Nina." She acknowledged as she walked in, closing the door behind her.
"Mackenzie." Nina stood up as Mac walked around the desk and dumped her things. "It's been a while."
"Yes it has, hasn't it? Still. Good things don't last forever. What can I do for you?"
Nina looked taken aback at Mac's sharpness, and looked down at the padded envelope she was holding.
"Well…" She suddenly sounded far less like the over-confident, sly, ruthless Nina that Mac had come to know, and seemed instead much more vulnerable. Mac straightened up, the smallest of frowns appearing on her face. She was trying to decide whether this was another ruse or not. "Do you recall – well, I'm sure you do – but you remember the last time we met? And I said that no little girl wants to grow up to be a gossip columnist?"
Mackenzie rolled her eyes. She knew what was coming. The sheer nerve of this woman to come into her newsroom – into her office – and play the tortured slave to gossip and voyeurism was the limit for Mac. She was not going to take this.
"Yes, I do. And that whole speech, as it turns out – surprise, surprise – was a ruse to get me to run around covering stuff up, terrified, when all you had was a source from Will, and you were never going to get another one, so you thought you'd get me to shake the bag upside down to see if anything fell out and then pick up the crumbs! Seriously! You cannot expect me to let you just come in here and –"
"YES! Okay, I did do that! Shitty, shitty me. I did it and I admit it."
"Well, that's okay then! As long as you admit it!" Mac was raising her arms in the air, incredulous, looking at Nina with contempt. The two women stared each other down, neither wanting to take the step down. Nina sighed, the vulnerability returning to her eyes. Once again, she caught Mac off-guard.
"I do. And I did it because it's my job. I'm sorry, but it pays the bills and its – it's my job! Okay? I know you think that everyone can be high and mighty and divert to the path of righteousness when they see the light, but it's not that easy Mackenzie!" She glared across the room at Mac, still twisting the envelope in her hands. "But…you'll be glad to know that I'm being sued for smearing some filthy-rich, plastic-surgery obsessed, Moet-drinking t- "
She rested her hands on the back of the chair in front of Mac's desk to recompose herself. Mac had no idea what to think. What was coming next? What was in that envelope? Nina's salvation? Did she have a story that would put her back on the map after this fall from grace – a story about News Night?
"Anyway. I'm leaving New York. I've been fired and I can't afford to live here anymore so I'm moving." Now she really had no clue where Nina was going with this. She was leaving town and on her farewell tour she had stopped to visit Mackenzie? What? Nina met her gaze and a knowing smirk suddenly appeared on her face.
You know those moments when the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you feel like you're being watched? Or that there is something, some plan going on that you don't know about?
"I was clearing out and packing and I found this from a few months back." Reluctantly, as though she wasn't entirely sure about what she was doing, Nina held out the envelope for Mackenzie to take.
She couldn't help it. She was curious. Mac took the package and gingerly opened it, keeping her eyes on Nina all the while. Reaching in, her hand made contact with a plastic, thin, rectangular object. It was just too large to be a phone – and there was no glass screen that she could feel at any rate. There was a USB wire at the end though. She pulled it out.
"It's a hard drive." Mac said blankly, more confused than ever.
"Yes." Nina answered, amused. "And there's something on it you should hear.
"Look Mackenzie, I'm not going to apologise for doing my job. It's not a very nice job, I'll admit, but I'm good at it, and I won't apologise for doing my best at what I'm good at. But, I didn't want to leave on bad terms."
She held out her hand to Mackenzie. Utterly confounded, Mackenzie just blinked, before taking the hand briefly.
"I'm sorry you lost your job." She wasn't entirely sure if she meant it, but she was never planning to see this woman again; and there was no way she was letting Nina Howard walk out of here on the moral high ground.
"Not sure I believe that," Nina smirked as she made her way to the door. Just before she reached it, however, she turned and paused, "You could say that this isn't completely selfless. If I'm correct, I may just have given myself something to write about."
With a last mysterious, and annoyingly knowing look, Nina walked out the door and out of Mac's life.
Mackenzie was now left standing, slightly shocked, with a mysterious hard drive in her hand and nothing on the other side of the equals sign.
And there's something on it you need to hear.
What on earth would Nina Howard, gossip columnist, and spineless-fish extraordinaire have on her hard drive that would interest –
And then it hit her. She, herself, had referred to it only moments ago: the voicemail.
Feeling numb, she sunk into her desk chair and slowly spun round to her computer. She looked from the hard drive to the screen and back again. If she had in her hands what she thought she had in her hands….
She plugged it in.
Listen, I swear I'm not saying this because I'm high. If the answer is no, then just do me a favour and don't call me back or don't bring it up or anything But I have to tell you – I mean, after tonight I really want to tell you – that I've never stopped loving you Mac. Never. You – you cheated on me, and screwed me up, and - it was shit – and I hate having too look at you sometimes…but I never stopped loving you. I couldn't if I wanted to. I don't actually, what I want to do is forgive you and just be with you again but – but I don't know how. I'm trying to find out. Anyway, I had a question, I said something about a – oh - yeah…
Look, since you came back I've been so happy to have you here…and then sometimes it drives me crazy because all I can see is – is – is just you and –him. [sighs] What I wanted to know is…if I can get past this…could you still love me? Could we make this work? ….If it's no then – well, what I said before.
I love you Mackenzie.
"She's been in there for fifteen minutes now." Jim said in a low voice to Charlie as the two of them and Will stood, trying to be unobtrusive, by a computer which was facing Mackenzie's office door. Will looked at his watch.
"I'm going in there." Charlie huffed as he straightened his jacket and began to move away. But just as he did, Mackenzie came out of the office and gazed around. She did not look anxious, but what was obvious was that she had been crying. Her gaze found Will's and their eyes locked.
Charlie and Jim began to seriously worry that Nina had dug something else up. They had seen her leave with a worrying amount of confidence about five minutes earlier, but Will – Will on the other hand, thought completely differently. He knew that look.
"Mac, you okay?" Jim asked, concerned. She walked over to them, ignoring Jim and just looking at Will. But she didn't stop to speak.
"Can we speak in your office?" She asked Will. Not waiting for an answer, strode past him meaning for him to follow her. Charlie and Jim grew more worried.
Now in Will's office, Mackenzie waited a couple of seconds before turning as she heard the door open once again behind her.
It was like a stand-off in an old Western. Both stood across from each other, only feet apart to see who would speak first.
Will cleared his throat. "Did she – I mean – what did she say?"
Mac was looking at him very strangely; like he was supposed to have done something and he didn't know what. She didn't speak for at least another minute, folding her arms across herself.
"Why that night?" her voice had come out sounding much calmer and gentler than she thought it would have.
"What?" Confused was an understatement.
"You said 'after tonight, I really want to tell you' – so…what was different about that night?"
Why was she sounding so calm? Inside she wanted to scream!
Will's face flooded with surprise as he realised what she was talking about. So that was what Nina had been doing here. He really didn't know what to say. Contrary to what he had told Mackenzie, he could remember exactly what he had said on that voicemail. Every word.
"You found out." He said in a hoarse voice. It only took a second before a small smile began to creep across her face, and she shook her head in slight exasperation.
"I – I already knew, Billy." She looked up at him as she closed the gap between them and tentatively curled her fingers around one of his hands, squeezing it gently. He was very tense. "I knew – that's why I was asking! I just wanted to hear you say it."
Again, Will was speechless. He couldn't think of anything to do but look back at her…and try to think of something to say. His mouth had gone very dry. But Mac being Mac – his Mac – she seemed to know what his problem was, and her smile only widened as she squeezed his hand again reassuringly.
"I don't know…" Mac dropped her gaze to their hands, now sounding suddenly uncertain of herself. When she looked back up, her eyes looked almost scared; but she seemed to find some nerve as she spoke again, "I don't know how far you've gotten with the – the issues you mentioned, but if – when you get past them…I'll be here."
"You're answering yes?" Will wasn't even consciously aware of deciding to speak, or of choosing what to say. All he knew was that his pulse had increased a hundred fold, and his mind was acting as though it was high – starting to run away with itself and wild imaginings.
Mac bit her lip, seemingly caught in the moment too. "My answer is this."
Giving him every opportunity to stop her, Mac slowly closed the gap between them, looking into his eyes right until the moment their lips joined.
It was glorious. It was – there really wasn't a good enough a description for how right this moment felt.
Once more his body seemed to react without any help from his mind, as one hand wound its way into her hair and the other, already in her own hand, brought them up to rest in the now tight space between them.
Her weight against him, her arm around his waist, her lips moulded with his – it all felt so natural and instinctive. Time always seems to go at a third of the rate in moments like this, but when she pulled back it still felt as though it hadn't lasted long enough.
They both felt dazed. For months or – well, over a year in fact – they had danced around each other, playing a long, long game; and now, in the space of ten minutes, everything had shifted. For better or for worse, Will wasn't quite sure. But all he did know was that Mackenzie loved him. She loved him, and she had kissed him, and although he couldn't quite answer her question about his "issues", he now had an incentive to really work through them.
He wanted this. He wanted her. Charlie was right: why date anyone else after you've already found The One? And she'd wait. She had said she would wait!
Mac was smiling at him contentedly, her arm still around his waist warmly pressing into his back, her other fingers brushing over his knuckles as she waited for him to say something. He smiled back, and ran his hands through her fringe which was threatening to cover her eyes. He wanted to explain that he couldn't promise that this was plain sailing – that they couldn't simply pick up where they left off – that they couldn't –
But as he stared at her, he realised she already knew all of this. She was willing to wait.
So why spoil a perfectly beautiful moment? Leaning his forehead against hers, he steeled himself to say what he knew she wanted to hear.
Kissing her softly he whispered, "I love you Mackenzie McHale."
The smile she had been wearing stretched all the way to her dimples as she beamed back at him.
"I love you too Billy." And she reclaimed his lips with hers.
Aaron. I love you. That would really have killed you?