Author's Note: I was walking my dog and just came up with this little story. And I know Legolas name is Greenleaf, but I thought I'd change it to make it look like snow-white. Leaf-green, snow-white; get the drift?

Disclaimer: This is all what I do not own: Lord of the Rings things, any famous fairy tales including snow white, Wizard of OZ, etc. and any red mushrooms with white polka dots. Now I feel utterly miserable. Please Read on.

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The Adventures of Leaf-Green and the dwarf, 4 hobbits, 2 shrubby looking men, and a wizard being the Narrator, and lots more!

Once upon a time, like any other fairy tales will start, there was a hero/ heroine…

She/ him lived in a beautiful castle and sang songs about adventures in distant land or an attractive prince/ princess who will one day take his/her hand in marriage.

We can forget about them now, because they've got nothing to do with the story.

*~*~*

We switch our scene to Middle Earth, where a good-looking elf Prince of Mirkwood is talking to the trees. He is our main character, Leaf-Green.

One day Leaf-Green was being miserable like all main characters are in the beginning of stories, when his two evil twin step brothers came and told him to get lost in the woods. So he did.

And although he made a trail of Lembas bread crumbs, he soon found that 4 hungry Hobbits had eaten it away while he wasn't looking. Suddenly he heard a voice from behind.

"Hey baby, where you going?" a talking hyena-wolf thing with shades chattered, "If you're going to your granny's, us three can have lots of fun…"but when he saw Legolas was a guy, and a guy with dangerous looking arrows, he howled as he fled out of sight.

After Leaf-Green walked along a mysterious yellow brick road, he found a weird tree house made from fairy bread. (If you don't what that is, it's a normal piece of bread cut into triangles with butter and hundreds and thousands sprinkled on them.) After he climbed the liquorish rope, he knocked on a door that said, "Keep out, wicked witch of the Lothlorien Forest ain't happy."

"Mrs. Witch, Mrs. Witch, let me come in?"

"Not by the beautiful blonde hair of my golden head, head." The witch replied.

"Then I'll huff and I'll puff, and eat through your…!" Legolas threatened.

The chocolate-coated marshmallow door was opened and Gladriel gave an evil death stare to Legolas as she growled,

"NOT the chocolate-coated marshmallow door; you don't want to get on my bad side bitch."

She was really angry. When Leaf-Green asked her why she just recited a poem, which went like this:

"If you climb upon the second floor,

You will see the man I used to adore.

You shall find lying on the third bed,

An bastard of a dwarf cursed in hairy red."

Then she left silently and gracefully, leaving an air of mystery. (Ok, this rhyming better stop, mop, top, hop.)

Leaf-Green, being blonde and very bored, did as she said and went up stairs. He found the first bed was too hard. The second bed was too soft. But the third bed, the third bed was juuuuust right. And sitting on the bed was another angry looking character, but he had an unusually long and thick red beard. Legolas checked the name on the bed and it said Gimli.

Legolas exclaimed, "Gimli my man, I mean dwarf. I didn't notice you with all that hair. Is this you new look?"

"No," grumbled the over-bearded dwarf, "The bloody witch cursed me. We had a fight; she couldn't handle my ego."

Leaf-Green 's face fell. "O me gosh. You're the guy Gladriel "used to adore"? But…But your not even half her height!"

Gimli huffed in anger. "Don't treat me like I'm some sort of midget!" he bellowed, " I'm a real man!"

Suddenly Gimli's beard grew a few more inches, making it even harder to spot where his beetroot red face was. A wail of despair was heard from the sea of thick red curls.

Leaf-Green decided to leave his shaggy friend and went back down to the kitchen in the first floor. He found that the wicked witch had left a red mushroom with white polka dots on the bench. He was hungry so he ate it. Then the Prince of Mirkwood went into a deep sleep without being noticed for a century or so.

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Author: (to a hundred thousand angry Legolas fan girls.) Wait, HE'S NOT DEAD! HE'S NOT DEAD! Remember, elves are immortal so just think of it as a long coma. (Sighs as the not-yet satisfied fan girls leave.) *Smirks* He's not dead, YET. Find out what happens on next chap!