Disclaimer: Disney owns all the characters and places. I'm just playing with all the toys.
Summary: Political problems hindered the Jedi from ever finding young Obi-Wan Kenobi. At the age of seven young Obi-Wan literally runs into Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn. Still hurt from the past Qui-Gon only sees a powerful and potential boy for the Jedi Order, but the Force has other plans in mind.
The Freedom in Tomorrow
Of all the Jedi sitting around back at the temple the council just had to chose him to go to the moon of Stewjon and negotiate with the renegades.
Qui-Gon Jinn leaned back in the pilots chair and looked out the view port at the little moon. He didn't care what the Force was trying to tell him, today just wasn't his day. With one final glance over the data given to him by the council he pressed a few buttons and the ship lurched forward.
Old habits die hard he guessed. He looked at the co-pilot seat still believing he would see someone there. He sighed, chastising himself, two years and he shouldn't still be looking over his shoulder expecting, wishing... No, he had to stop doing this! It happened two years ago and what was done was done. He rubbed his temples and verbally went over the information again, "Since its formation, Stewjon has been a more pacifist system. Over time some wished to live a different lifestyle. So they moved to the moon and set up their own province. Fifteen years ago a tyrant took leadership of the moon and since then they have laid siege on the planet surface. The president of Stewjon has requested a Jedi's presence to try and make peace between the the moon and mother planet."
He huffed and angled the ship towards the planet and lightly mumbled, "easier said than done."
It only took two hours for Qui-Gon to know that these negotiations were not going to go smoothly, he didn't even know if they were going to happen at all.
The first thing he figured out was that the people of Stewjon, on the moon or on the surface were all at least a head shorter than he was. Because of their smaller... stature all the furniture was smaller too. After a twenty minute flight in a cramped ship he and the president had been waiting in "the Great Uniter's" quiet luxurious waiting room. He was standing by a window while the president sat on one of the soft couches. With nothing to do he decided it probably would look better if he started working with what he had. So he turned to face the president and made his way over.
He was in the middle of the room when he felt like something in the Force pass by him. He stopped and tried to see if it would happen again, it was like a warm breeze and he liked it. He was still searching for that unusual sensation when the door opened and a little boy walked through carrying a tea pot and three cups on a silver platter. The pot, being more than half the size of the boy, was filled to the brim with hot tea. He did not see Qui-Gon standing in the middle of the room. Nor did Qui-Gon see the boy coming.
He had finally pinpointed the feeling in the Force and was in the middle of turning to face the being or thing responsible for such an amazing feeling when it bumped into his leg then he felt a burning liquid afterwards. He didn't have time to blink before he heard a crashing sound and the door behind him open.
Things after that happened so fast it was all like a blur to Qui-Gon. He wasn't too burnt, his boot had caught the brunt of the tea. The boy, on the other hand who was only dressed in what was left of leggings, was now drenched in hot tea. He didn't look more than seven or eight years old and was awfully thin. Qui-Gon could count each and every rib along with the many bruises that wrapped around the child. His mop of growing auburn hair was soaked in tea, he was on the tiny side, or tinier side, and he was quiet, really quiet. Even with the liquid covering his whole being the boy didn't let out much more than a whimper. Hidden beneath the hair were the most beautiful eyes Qui-Gon had ever seen. A mix of blue, grey and green and filled to the brim with fear, curiosity and life.
He had never seen such beautiful eyes but that wasn't what caught Qui-Gon's attention the most. The Force felt incredibly strong around the child, it felt like he was in the presence of something greater than the galaxy itself. Then at that moment something between him and the boy collided and he felt instantly tied to the child. He couldn't explain it and almost didn't believe that connection happened. What was the Force doing to him? He wasn't ready to take another young one under his wings...
He heard the prime minister of Stewjon and the alleged "uniter" yelling behind him but he paid them no mind. He could feel the boy's pain, it was overwhelming and the boy had yet to let out more than a peep. He crouched down so he could at least be closer to eye level but boy only scooted further away wincing as he moved. Qui-Gon raised his hands with the intentions of telling him not move but he took it the complete opposite way. The child let out something like a whimper and cowered closer to the ground and further away. "
"It's alright child. I won't hurt you. You are hurt, let me-" he was cut off when a man stepped in his way and was storming over towards the boy.
"Such a foolish brat. My apologies Master Jedi. I can get your clothes replaced immediately."
Qui-Gon still stayed in the crouching position but he looked up at the "Uniter". "That won't be necessary..."
"Kuvi. Ra Kuvi. Ruler of this moon," the man said as he looked down at the boy in disgust.
Qui-Gon felt something close to fear start to swirl around the boy. Then just like that Kuvi's boot collided with the boy's rib cage. The boy didn't know how to shield his emotions so every kick to the head or ribs Kuvi could muster Qui-Gon felt it too. Soon he couldn't take it any longer and the boy probably couldn't either. In a flash he was over the beaten boy and looking up at Kuvi.
"It was just an accident. Did this boy really deserve this!? He's so small as it is." He probably looked pathetic hunched over this helpless boy but Kuvi was being just... just horrid.
After seeing the Jedi jump in to protect the boy the prime minister finally spoke up, "Yes Kuvi, just because you moon mongrels like beating stolen children for pleasure, spare us of this... attraction!"
Qui-Gon rolled his eyes and carefully started to place the half conscious boy in his lap.
Kuvi appeared to look down at the prime minister then looked at Qui-Gon. "Forgive me Master Jedi. I forgot how sensitive you Jedi are to... life forms." That said Kuvi clapped his hands twice.
Before the echoing of the claps faded a young boy in leggings walked in with a girl with two brown braids. The boy at least looked healthier than the one Qui-Gon was holding but he still didn't look great. Kuvi gave the boy a pat on the head, "This one will take you to your room. Our 'negotiations' will begin tomorrow. Gentlemen." He bowed then left the room. Once he was gone the boy started to leave too with the prime minister closely on his heals.
The girl made her way over to Qui-Gon, she kept her eyes on the ground or the boy who was almost hidden in his lap. "I'll take'im off yur hands sur," she glanced over towards the door Kuvi had exited from then whispered, "and thank ya fur savin young Kenobi here."
Qui-Gon nodded and moved so he was resting on his heels and looked down at young Kenobi once more. He tried his best to smile at the shivering little boy, "You're welcome young one. Now lets get you taken care of."
He gently laid the boy back down on the floor then took off his thick brown robe. He was going to wrap it around the boy but the girl stopped him. "Sur yous don't have to do that. I'll make sure he makes it back to the sleepin rooms."
He huffed and continued to wrap young Kenobi, "I will do it young one. I want to make sure this boy doesn't get an illness from burning skin on my account."
She didn't argue with him so once Kenobi was wrapped up Qui-Gon easily, too easily gathered the boy in his arms. Even half concious and in pain the boy snuggled against Qui-Gon's chest. He looked down at the boy then at the girl. "Please lead the way to a tub of water."
She hesitated for a moment then looked at young Kenobi wrapped up in the brown robe then nodded and lead him towards the water.
He gently laid the robe back over the now sleeping Kenobi then looked at the girl who had very stubbornly refused to give Kenobi and himself any time alone. "So perhaps you can answer a few of my questions."
She hesitated again but then decided she could trust the very tall and mysterious man. She was about to start talking when he interrupted her. "Outside if you please. These quarters are a little too small for me." He tried to make a joke of it but the girl didn't laugh. She only gave Kenobi one last glance then walked outside and around the brick house.
Once they were both settled out of sight of the main house the girl spoke, "I'm Benni. That's young Kenobi yous been helpin."
Qui-Gon nodded and extended his hand to her. She looked at his hand, waiting for it to do something. He cleared his throat and put his hand down, "So how long as young Kenobi been here? To be getting Kuvi that furious he must be new?"
"Oh no sur. Hes been here since he was a wee thing. The moon peoples been making raids on the Stewjon peoples fur years now. Theys steal childs ever time theys go down. Thens they bring'em back to the moon as servants. Thats how I gots here. Bout sevun years ago."
Out of everything he had seen in the galaxy he had decided a long time ago that slavery was the worst. It was an abominations and it just made him sick to think about what these people were and have been going through. It made it worse when he mentally did the math, that boy had been here for years under that harsh treatment and somehow still survived to live another pitiful day. "I'm so sorry Benni. Do you want to go home?" Mentally he slapped himself. Of course she probably wished to go home, who willingly wanted to ever be a slave?
Benni shrugged, "Is don't know. Is only ten yeurs old'n don't really member my life befure. Gurls here don't get a rough beatin like the boys do. Ta be real honest with yur sur Kenobi has been here fur some time now."
That sent a shiver down his spine. "What do you mean the oldest?"
"These moon peoples steal the youngest of the boys back home. Whens they come here its the gurls job to take care of'em and teach'em how ta do things. Notice how they ain't many gurls round here?" He nodded so she continued, "Wes have to teach'em what the taller man want'em to know. They don't talk specially to the taller men and that theys gotta do anythin the taller men says. If not well... theys get a beatin. The higher ups ain't too patient with youngings. Whens they mess up, cause they so young, theys get too many beatins then theys gone. I've seen so many of'em go Is don't count'em anymore. Young Kenobi sures gotten his share and more of them, hes a special one sur. It takes mubey a day then hes all better again... mostly better anyways. Hes bout sevun now and a real good one too. When hes can hes'l say thats it was him doin the messin up and then the taller men'll give him the beatin when it shoulda been the wee ones."
He put his head in his hands. His emotions were so chaotic. He thought about all those boys that had died here during the past fifteen years. He regretted not getting there sooner to help, he felt anger towards Kuvi and a great great sadness for young Kenobi. Lastly the memories of the past hit him hard. Things and mistakes that happened two years ago exactly on this day. Then rather quickly he took hold of all those emotions then released them all into the Force.
"Why did you name him young Kenobi?"
"The gurl befur me used to tell a story of a hero, hes was destine to save the world and hes had dem three changin colored eyes."
Those beautiful eyes. So full of light and new life. The more he thought about what Benni said he wanted to believe that story. No matter what it cost him Qui-Gon knew he had to get young Kenobi off the moon. Then once hat was done he would take him back to the temple. He didn't know what would happen after that but the Force at least owed the boy that much.
Early the next morning Qui-Gon quietly went back down to the barracks to check on Kenobi. From what Benni told him the day before he shouldn't have been disappointed when he couldn't find him. With nothing more he could do about the boy he made his way to Kuvi's chambers. The doors were elegant and huge. He admired good wood doors as much as the next man so after admiring for a moment more he pounded as hard as he could, probably waking the whole house. He heard shuffling inside then the door swung open and a small bruised boy in trousers stood before him.
His heart ached for the boy but he had to move on, "Hello child. I'm here to talk with Kuvi,"
The boy nodded then went back into the room. Soon Kuvi was at the door in his nightgown. "What do you want, as such an early hour Master Jedi?"
"I want to talk to you about the boy yesterday."
Kuvi blinked then motioned for Qui-Gon to come inside. As he walked in the boy left, leaving the two alone. When the doors were closed Qui-Gon asked again, "the boy?"
Kuvi went over to a tea pot and some cups and shrugged. "He's just a boy Master Jedi. I'm sure he'll be fine."
Qui-Gon had to remind himself to keep breathing. He clenched his hand tighter and just stared out the giant window out towards the sleeping quarters. He had gone through multiple conversations in his mind all night, he was going to have to be negotiable to this tyrant whether he liked it or not. He had come up with a few different routes he could go to winning Kenobi's freedom it was only a matter of time. "I wish to have the boy. What is your price?"
Kuvi actually stopped making the tea and looked over at Qui-Gon with a raised eyebrow. He laughed, "What would a Jedi want with a puny excuse for a little sick boy?"
No emotion. No emotion. He kept telling himself, "If he is such a sick boy then wouldn't you want to get rid of him? I mean you don't want to infect the rest."
Kuvi shrugged and walked over to Qui-Gon with two steaming cups, "I'll just get more in our next raid. No loss to me Master Jedi."
He had had enough with this animal. He slapped both cups out of Kuvi's hands then used the Force to push him clear across the room and leave an indent on the wall.
"What the kriff Master Jedi!? He's just a boy!"
Qui-Gon walked over and grabbed the man by his nightgown and lifted him so high he couldn't touch the floor anymore. "He's more than just a boy to me!"
Kuvi sneered, "and what would you do if I refused Jedi?"
Qui-Gon leaned closer to Kuvi's face, "I swear right now I'd kill you. That would make negotiations real easy wouldn't it?"
Kuvi's eyes went wide, "You... you wouldn't y-y-you're a Jedi!"
"Jedi change," as he said these words his eyes slowly started to change from green to yellow. Kuvi's fear was still very much there but he was so amazed with the Jedi's eyes he didn't resist when Qui-Gon wrapped his other hand around his neck. When he wasn't getting any air to his lungs then he started to squirm.
Qui-Gon was about to make the final squeeze when a young voice filled the air, "NOO!"
He let go of Kuvi, the man was gagging and breathing in air while Qui-Gon looked where the voice originated from. There at the door young bruised and beat up Kenobi stood holding a platter with a breakfast feast on it. His eyes were wide with terror and he was breathing heavy.
Qui-Gon took one step towards the boy, "young one-"
Kenobi inhaled, laid the platter on the ground then took off running. Qui-Gon almost ran after the boy but then he remembered Kuvi. He looked back down at the man. "You WILL free Kenobi to me."
Kuvi nodded, "I will I will. Okay happy now?" He didn't dare stand up for fear that the Jedi would push him down again or worse.
Qui-Gon nodded and knelt down so he was eye level with the animal, "You are done with this. I don't give a kriff if you and your people stay on this vaping moon, but you must give all your captives a chance to go back home..."
Kuvi just kept nodding, he was too entranced at the Jedi's changing eyes. As the Jedi kept talking about how he wasn't going to invade the planet anymore and something about no slaves he watched the Jedi's eyes as they changed back from a green yellow to their original green color rather fast. He felt the Jedi pat his head then Kuvi was left alone in the room.
Qui-Gon ran down the hall reaching out through the Force trying to pick up the boy's trail. He made his way outside and looked around. Past the slave barracks there was a group of wiry trees. At the trunk of one he could make out Benni and he could easily tell she was in the middle of yelling up into one. The closer he got he could feel the boy's presence getting stronger and stronger in his mind. He followed Benni's stare and saw the boy climbing higher and higher in the tree. He made sure his steps were quiet, he was pretty sure he was the reason young Kenobi was up in the tree and he didn't need to scare the boy any more.
The more Benni yelled the more Kenobi climbed, "Youngin yous get down here right now! Yur play time ain't till after lunch!"
The boy finally stopped climbing and shook his head, "no."
Benni's eyes grew really big and her jaw dropped, "Did.. did yous just spek?!"
Qui-Gon bent down under a branch and made his way to Benni, "He did indeed Benni."
Benni ran a hand through her hair, entangling it in the braid she had just finished, "Is never thought he spek. Thought he couldn't even if he tried..."
Qui-Gon went down to one knee and placed his hand on Benni's shoulder, "Young Kenobi is a good boy. There's no doubt about that," he looked at Benni then he turned his attention to Kenobi, "young one, I... I wish to thank you."
He still clung to the tree but Kenobi tilted his head so his ears were more open for listening. Qui-Gon took that as a good sign. To make sure it wouldn't be in vain he started doing something he hadn't done in years. He sent reassuring, safe, peaceful and kind thoughts to young Kenobi through their new bond. It was uncomfortable for him at first and he started to feel like it was just a waist of time. He was about to stop doing it and just leave when he felt Kenobi at the other end of the bond start to receive what he had sent. Instantly he started doing it again tenfold. He needed time alone with the boy so he leaned over and whispered into Benni's ear, "Can you give us a minute?"
Benni nodded and headed off towards the main house. Once she was gone Qui-Gon sat down in the dewy grass while still sending those good feelings in the boy's direction. Neither said anything for a while, they just soaked in each others presences, content with the here and now. Finally Qui-Gon cleared his throat, "Young one... Do you mind me calling you that?"
Kenobi shook his head and carefully climbed down one branch.
It made the corner of Qui-Gon's mouth lift into the beginnings of a smile, "Do you have a name?"
The boy shook his head again.
"That's alright little one. We can think of one together if you would like... My name is Qui-Gon Jinn."
He didn't say a word but one of his little auburn eyebrows went up, Qui-Gon saw that and started chuckling, "I know. Quite a name right?"
Young Kenobi smiled.
He was about to speak again when he felt something poke at his mind. He had almost forgotten what if felt like to have someone search his mind so innocently. His first instinct was to immediately put up stronger shields, to keep it out from invading his privacy but that would never do this time. Slowly he lowered some of his shields and let the boy in. Then boy kept exploring his mind.
"You learn fast little one. You felt it yesterday didn't you?"
Immediately the poking stopped.
"No no don't stop. There is no harm done. It's called a bond. It... it connects us together up here," he pointed to his head then to the boy's head. The boy pointed to his head and Qui-Gon nodded. "Yes little one. It's all in there. We can't see it but it's there. It has to do with something called the Force"
At the word the 'Force' it was like something came alive in the boy. He started to climb down the tree. He was going so fast, he misplaced his foot on a branch and it snapped. He started falling and hitting other branches on his way. Once he was low enough Qui-Gon was there to grab him from falling the rest of the way. He still didn't say a word but Qui-Gon could feel the pain through the bond. He could feel every bit of the boy's pain, there were many ribs broken. Tears were starting to form in Kenobi's eyes but the spark was still there and perhaps shinning brighter.
Together they sat under the tree and Qui-Gon taught the boy how to release the pain into the Force. No words were spoken but none were needed. Qui-Gon would starting doing something then the boy would soon be doing the same thing. When the little healing session was over the boy was asleep in his arms.
Qui-Gon looked down at the little bruised face and brushed away a lock of hair. He took the quiet moment to sink into the Force and feel the boy's presence. What he found was astonishing. The boy, untrained in the ways of the Force, was still a very bright light. He had never seen a light in the Force this bright.
He felt all kinds of emotions inside the bright child. He saw courage to face the taskmasters, he saw the need to protect the younger boys, he saw unfailing love for Benni, he saw just love for anything with life, he saw forgiveness, he saw big dreams of being up with the stars, he even saw himself; the emotion was a mix of devotion, sadness and just a need to be close to him. Then most of all he saw the boy knew that he was meant for something bigger.
Not sure what everything meant he slowly eased himself out of the boy's mind. When he opened his eyes the sun was setting below the big house, everything was quiet and when he looked down at his lap. The boy was still asleep with his head resting where Qui-Gon's heart was. Listening to the consistent thump thump. A half smile managed to peak through his usually stoic face and he whispered in the boy's ear, "Time to go home little one."
Once the ship was in hyperspace and everything was good he made his way to the little room at the back of the ship. One his way he grabbed a little ration pack for the boy just in case he was awake. To his surprise the boy was awake, curled up in a ball and wrapped in the blanked on the small bed. He knocked quietly on the door frame, it made the boy look up in his direction. Slowly the boy uncurled and patted the spot next to him.
Qui-Gon nodded and walked over to sit on the bed. Neither said a word, they both just enjoyed the company of each other. He only let it go on for a few moments more, he didn't want the boy to get used to this... this closeness with him. He looked over the child once more then he unwrapped the food and handed it to him. "Here, you um.. you should eat. It's not the best but you look like you need anything to eat.."
The boy smiled and one little hand reached out and took the food. Still half wrapped he started nibbling at the bar but still kept his eyes on Qui-Gon. He almost smiled but then looked away, he didn't want to but he knew it was the right thing to do. So hesitantly he started to get up and leave when he heard something.
|Whys he so sad?|
First he checked to make sure his shields were up, they were. Second he glanced over his shoulder down at the boy, he was still nibbling at the bar but now he was looking at his toes that were peaking out from under the blanket.
He knew he shouldn't have; it would be going against his intentions... but he had to know, "who young one?"
The boy froze and his eyes slowly drifted to meet Qui-Gon's Again the Jedi Master heard the voice |did... how did he hear that?|
Qui-Gon turned around to face the boy, "Our bond little one. Once it is strong enough you can sometimes speak through them. Like you did..."
He didn't speak, he wasn't certain how long it would be before the boy would get used to speaking out loud but if this bond was this strong already... kriff.
|Why are you so sad?| The little, innocent voice interrupted his thoughts again. He looked directly at the boy, hesitant at first, but if the Force wanted them this far along in a bond then he shouldn't question it. He thought of his reason then mentally sent it the boy's way. He waited... and waited...
|Sir?|
Curious... he tried again sending his words to the boy through the bond. Nothing. He sighed and quickly came to the conclusion that either the Force only wanted this as a one way connection or the boy was a VERY powerful Force user. He sat down on the bed again and leaned back against the wall. He made himself comfortable for what would be a very long talk. Once he was settled he looked back down at the boy. "I'm sad because I keep thinking of how much Kuvi stole from you."
The boy showed no change in emotion. Qui-Gon, a famed negotiator in the Jedi Temple, couldn't decipher the boy's thoughts. He would be a good negotiator if the council decided to give him a chance Qui-Gon thought.
|That can't be... you were sad, even before you saw me.|
He was starting to truly believe the boy was sitting next to him was more than meets the eye. "What do you mean child?"
The boy looked up at him and started to open his mouth but then closed it.
"I know what you were taught young one, but now that is behind you. Your freedom has been given to you. You may talk freely now. Beatings will become only a distant memory."
After a few more minutes of silence the boy did finally speak, his voice had a scratchy tone to it but it was soothing music to Qui-Gon's ears. "That's the way I see people. When I saw you, you were burdened with a heavy sadness that you've been carrying for a long time. In Benni I saw love for us boys and a yearning to go home... Don't you see that way too?"
Seeing their inner emotions, Qui-Gon had never heard of a Jedi capable of doing such things. There was no doubt in his mind that after the council knew about this that they would ever turn this boy away from the temple . He was so wrapped up in his thoughts he almost forgot the boy's question. He cleared his throat then answered, "No young one. I don't see people like that. Perhaps you have been using the Force for some time now, you just didn't know it..."
Now he was very curious and nothing really would stop him from asking the boy, "Tell me, when you looked at the older men who... beat you what did you see?"
The boy barely thought about it before he spoke, "They were full of confusion and fear. Cept for Kuvi, he was just using us boys as excuses to release his anger against the planet people."
"You were never mad or felt anger towards them?"
He shook his head, "They didn't know why they was doin it-"
"Were doing it. Were. Not was doing it. Were doing it."
The boy didn't speak then he nodded and continued, "It was just what they were told ta do. Kuvi was never really angry at us. He has dreams like everyone else but he was just frustrated cause he couldn't get his dreams completed. It still hurt and I feared every blow but I knew it really wasn't towards me."
Qui-Gon's heart started to melt. Years of mistreatment and little or no love yet this boy had more love and forgiveness in his just his right arm then Qui-Gon possessed. Through this boy he saw new light, a new way to see life. He quietly thanked the Force for bringing him to this boy. Now he understood why the Force chose him for this certain mission. After two years of recluse, hidden anger and regret the Force knew what he needed. He wasn't completely healed from the scars but at least now he knew he truly was on the road to recovery. "Young one, you see nothing but the good in people. Something even I haven't learned to do. The Force has something very special planned for you. Your gentle heart will take you far."
The boy looked up at him, "Will you be with me?"
Qui-Gon hesitated then slowly wrapped one of his big arms around the boy's small frame. "I don't know young one... When we get back to the temple things will change for the better... and the better may not be with me."
The boy looked down at his hands then leaned closer towards Qui-Gon, "It's better with you Qui-Gon."
He looked down at the boy leaning into his chest. He was trying not to fall attached to his boy. Even when he was carrying the boy onto the ship he had already made up his mind that he wouldn't be the one to train the boy. He wouldn't risk this child's chances of a bright future. He wouldn't screw things up like he did with... with.. Xantos.
The room was quiet, the only sound was the light hum of the ships generators. The boy took a deep breath then quietly said, "I feel safe right now... with you."
He blinked once then twice and then a third time before looking down at the little one. He didn't realize he was running one of his hands through the boy's hair. He was about to pull it away when the child took his little hands and started to intertwine his little bony fingers with his big callused ones. Qui-Gon looked into the boy's big bright blue green grey eyes. For the first time in two years he truly and fully smiled. He decided it had to have been the Force's work because he wouldn't have come to such a name even if he meditated on it day and night. "You are a special child Obi-Wan Kenobi."
Author's Note: First, I hope you enjoy this story so far. Updates won't be consistent because of school but I DO promise that this story will be finished. It won't be forgotten.
Second, this is defiantly an AU story but things that happened before this point in history did happen. So everything up until this point did happen in Qui-Gon's life and for those of you who do know what happened understand that he still hasn't found THE reason to really get over his mistakes from the past with Xantos. He is still plauged by guilt, self pity and anger towards himself. So that little episode he had with Kuvi I believe could have been very reasonable.
MTFBWY
Revised grammar errors 12/4/2014