Team: Pride of Portree
Round: Jurassic Fever
Position: Keeper
Keeper's Prompt: Velociraptor: Write about a character joining a group (such as The Death Eaters, Order of the Phoenix, Marauders, etc.)
Word count: 2363
This story is AU following Snape's death in the Shrieking Shack and features the theory that there are multiple different worlds with different kind of magic and different kind of demons. Italic is for Snape's thoughts.
Warning for a single occasion of coarse language.
Much love to my betas Story Please, Crochetaway and Sekdaniels!
A Demonic Second Chance
Fuck, I wish I was dead. This was not the first time in the past two weeks that Severus Snape had dwelt on the pros of not existing. And there was only one man to blame for it— Dumbledore! Alright, fine, maybe he could find a bit of blame for himself, too; but mostly for the meddling old fool.
He glanced over his shoulder at the ten-foot-tall demon with huge black leathery wings and claws that could tear his head clear off. The bastard was approaching at a steady pace and had proved resistant against all of the spells Severus could think to hurl at it.
Something flashed next to Severus, and in a swift motion the demon's head was lopped off its shoulders, giving Severus barely enough time to cast a Protego before he was showered with sticky greenish goo spurting from the demon's neck. Anastasia Rian landed lightly, with the grace of a dancer and flashed a smile. "That was a tough one. Thank you for distracting him, partner."
Severus snarled but held his tongue as the tall blonde adjusted her leather duster and put her sword back in the sheath. She then proceeded to check her makeup and hair in a small compact mirror and from it caught a glimpse of Severus's sour expression. "Oh come on, don't be so gloomy, Servus." The mispronunciation was so emphasized, Severus would have thought it was on purpose, were it not for those disgustingly innocent-looking blue eyes staring back at him. "Another successful night's work. What more could a soul possibly want?"
Well, Severus for one knew exactly what he wanted: to curse the day he'd been sentenced to the Dead Petal Society, contender for the stupidest organization name since Death Eaters; and in contention for the honor since they were disbanded. Alright, he wasn't sentenced; he chose it. Sort of. Why focus on that, though?
2 weeks prior...
The room reminded Severus of the Leaky Cauldron. Only it was definitely more leaky and there were also more cauldrons. To be precise, the roof was leaking like a sieve and someone had haphazardly placed cauldrons under the biggest leaks. Unlike the Leaky, this place was very empty apart from a certain wizard with a penchant for odd robes, who was sitting at the bar.
Truthfully, if Severus had a list of people he wanted to meet after death, Dumbledore was not very high on it. As he wondered if he could just back out slowly and leave, the man turned and waved.
"Come here, dear boy!"
For a moment, Severus thought he could still make a run for it. Then it occurred to him that his escape plan had a hole. Or, rather, lacked one. The room had no exits. Come to think of it, it didn't have an entrance either, but Severus didn't really want to ponder on how he had gotten there. With a resigned groan he walked up to Dumbledore and took a chair.
"Headmaster."
Dumbledore smiled warmly, "Severus! I hope our plan worked?"
Your plan, you meddling fool. Severus glared back at him. "I did what you asked of me. The rest is in the hands of the Potter brat!"
"Then it is in good hands indeed!" Dumbledore patted him on the back and smiled. "How about a drink, my dear boy?" As if on cue, an eerie Tom-lookalike appeared behind the bar to pour out a glass of firewhiskey for Snape and a spectacular layered red, green, and golden cocktail with cherries and a small umbrella on top for Dumbledore.
Dumbledore accepted his drink happily and took a sip, the umbrella getting stuck in his beard. Severus took his firewhiskey and looked around. "What is this place?"
"What was your first impression?" Dumbledore asked back, trying to fish one of the cherries out of his drink using the straw.
Just like the old man to not give a straight answer. "It looks like the Leaky Cauldron but not exactly."
"Yes, well, it is in a way. In another way it is a stop between worlds. I believe you haven't had trouble figuring out tha—"
"I died? Yes, the overgrown worm tearing out my neck was a decent hint. So is this my afterlife? An empty pub?" He'd hoped for Lily but on reflection, with Lily Potter came James Potter as well as potential questions about one Harry Potter and there was no telling how forgiving Lily would be, so an empty pub with an endless supply of firewhiskey for brooding over seemed like a nice, safe option.
"Oh no, as I said, it is merely a temporary stop on your journey." Dumbledore smiled happily as he was finally able to catch the cherry and pop it into his mouth. Delight spread over his features. "You see, here is where you can choose. You can, of course, move on to the afterlife. Heaven knows you've earned it, dear boy."
Severus eyed him suspiciously trying to figure out what the man was on about. "But?"
"But I believe there are other places where your talents could be useful. I was contacted a bit ago by an old friend. She had a problem she was trying to solve and I thought you'd be the right man for the job. Of course back then you were preoccupied but now…" Dumbledore's voice trailed off once again in that I-am-not-ordering-you-but-you-should-definitely-do-this manner.
Severus was fully ready to slam his drink on the counter and yell something like: "I've paid my debt and I am done serving manipulative bastards!" Except he didn't. He didn't do that because he wasn't about to waste good firewhiskey and because Dumbledore was smiling at him and he felt a twinge of guilt all of a sudden. "Why?"
"I think you'd like the offer and it would be a chance to start clean. I know you never wanted to teach. You were forced into a lot of positions without any choice. This would be a chance to try again in a different place."
It sounded too good to be true. Coming from Dumbledore, it was doubly suspicious. Severus should have known better. But it couldn't possibly be worse than having to tolerate an afterlife of Lily and James kissing or Sirius hounding him. He didn't dare hope he'd get actual peace in the afterlife. The world really liked to mess with him.
Dumbledore absolutely beamed with happiness. "Excellent, my dear boy. She's waiting for you!"
Severus narrowed his eyes in suspicion to ask why this she was already waiting and when Dumbledore already contacted her. But of course before he could ask him any of those things, the old man was gone—in a puff of rainbow smoke, no less. Instead, Severus found a nice door leading out of whatever this Nearly-Leaky-Cauldron was. With a heavy sigh he downed his drink and he reached for the doorknob.
The room was unnecessarily pompous. The floors were covered with soft carpets, the walls with bookshelves from floor to ceiling. A small fireplace was in one corner and in the other a large oak table with many heavy leather-bound tomes. Severus scoffed at the sight, fully expecting someone in a tailored suit and a walking cane topped with a skull to be waiting for him.
It was worse. The woman behind the table was the complete opposite of the room. She was young, maybe in her thirties at the most, with green eyes and long red hair, the unnatural kind of bright red, not Lily's red, for whatever that was worth. "Ah, Mister Snape! Please, come in. Take a seat!" She jumped up from her chair, causing a pile of parchments on her table to topple over. "Albus spoke very highly of you!"
"And who might you be?"
"Oh, I do apologize. Where are my manners?" replied the woman cheerfully.
Severus gave her an acidic look. Perhaps in that unorganized pile of paperwork?
"I am Arminda Agrestes and this here is the Dead Petal Society!" She gestured around, nearly knocking over another pile of papers.
Severus arched one eyebrow in a look that he hoped conveyed enough contempt. "And what, pray tell, is that?"
"Oh, it is a society of like-minded people who have devoted their lives to demon hunting!"
Severus blinked. Then he blinked again. Then, completely uncharacteristic of him, he found himself speechless. "Hunting what now?"
"Demons! Didn't Albus tell you?" Arminda smiled happily.
No, of course Albus didn't tell me any relevant details, why would he? It is only my life! "I think he forgot to mention it."
"Well, then let me. The world...well, our world, not yours, has been overtaken by demons who have seen fit to use it as their personal playground. We few have in turn taken it upon ourselves to fight against them. Unfortunately, the war has been shifting in their favor and we'd appreciate any help to even out the odds." The smile on her face seemed to indicate she thought this explained everything sufficiently. Severus dared to disagree.
"Demons? You want my help to fight demons?"
"Well, yes. Albus said you were good. Some kind of a general!" she batted her eyelashes and if Severus didn't know better, he'd have thought she was in the process of charming him.
"And that was the short version?"
"Well, I can make it longer. That's just the gist of things. Basically, there used to be a moderate number of demons in every world. Every world had their own secret organization who'd remove those demons when ever they began to gain too much power. Think of it as a Buffy the Vampire Slayer for every world out there. Except, you know, we don't make one special girl fight all our battles. All our fighters are of age…" she trailed off as Snape tried to figure out what the hell was a Buffy. Then her eyes focused again on him and the borderline manic smile returned. "Anyway, then on other Earths, the wizards started fighting amongst themselves and the demons decided to take a hike instead of getting caught in the crossroads. And during the aforementioned taking of the hike, they all ended up in our world. Which leads to this unfortunate overrunning. Demons can dimension hop, so while they have increased in numbers, the number of local petals has stayed the same."
"Petals?"
"Yes, well, it's what we call ourselves. Sort of an inside joke. Cause we're the-"
"Dead Petal Society. Yes, I see the clever humor in it."
"I'm glad you do!" she seemed to be completely oblivious to his dripping sarcasm. "Lately we've been branching out, trying to contact other worlds for reinforcements. We've discovered that at the moment of death, humans can choose to world-hop instead. First we contacted Albus but he had unfinished business. He suggested you. Seemed to imply your death would be forthcoming—"
"You talked to Dumbledore after his death? How?"
"Oh, just a bit of necromancy. Nothing too clever. Anyway, if you're not interested, then we can certainly figure something else out. I'd understand. Warriors usually want to rest. Can't blame them either. Sometimes I wish I could rest but–-" she began to make another wide gesture when a loud crash and something fell through the ceiling.
Severus had just enough time to cast a quick Protego and duck as an eight feet tall creature rose up and raised a huge claw hand to strike at Arminda. She stumbled out of the way, reaching for a sword. Another claw slashed out at her and she fell, the weapon slipping over the table and out of her reach. She tried diving for it but missed and the monstrosity raised a clench fist.
"Sectumsempra!" The spell wasn't enough to hurt the creature as it would have a human, but something oily black did ooze from its back and it turned its attention on Severus. He took a step forward and let out a guttural scream. "Avada Kedavra!" The creature gagged and stopped, then raised its left hand to strike and a heavy tome came down on his head and he fell over. Arminda yanked a long dagger from her hip and struck it into the creature's neck.
She fell over panting, then wiped her hands on her black dress. "And right on my new carpet as well. They're getting cheeky." She took a few deep breaths. "So, as I was saying, it's a completely voluntary thing."
Yep, he could totally walk away. Because after this pathetic display of almost getting gutted by a demon, I can totally leave another redhead to her fate. On the other hand, it had been a while since he last duelled. Spy work had never been his thing. He preferred fighting, with blood pumping in his veins and the constant risk of death egging him on. As far as second chances went, this was not that bad.
Present
Severus pulled himself out of his thoughts just in time to see Anastasia staring at him, obviously waiting for an answer to whatever question he had managed to miss. "What?" he snapped, rather more gruffly that was strictly necessary.
"I said would you like to grab a drink with me and the others before we call it a night?"
He was just about to answer exactly what he thought of having alcoholic beverages with a bunch of amateur demon hunters when there was a loud bang and he was swept off his feet. When he scrambled back up, he saw something fat and green retreating, waving short wings trying to fly away and carry off another fair maiden. This made the third he'd seen in a week and served to cement Severus's suspicion that there had to be a nest of them nearby.
Anastasia was already on it, swinging her sword with a look of true delight on her face. With a sour expression Severus yanked out his wand and followed reluctantly. Two elder demons, a Krampus, something riding a rhinoceros that Severus could not even begin to name, and now a maiden-hungry swamp demon. And it was only Tuesday. I'd rather have tea with Sirius Black and his crazy House-elf.