I own nothing, all of these characters belong to Stephanie.

Silence.

Nothing.

Peace to some degree.

I lay face down in a snow drift my arms spread out to my sides, I should be experiencing hyperthermia. I was as cold as the snow yet I didn't feel cold.

The vast space around me was silent, at peace. Yet here I lay with my mind in utter turmoil.

I had run to Alaska, well more or so drove, but either way you look at it I had fled.

One small girl had blindsided my composure and control forcing me to run like a bat out of hell.

She smelt amazing to me and she was oblivious to how close her end had come on that train.

I groaned as the fire sparked in my throat as I recalled that day.

I was riding the 1-95 on an overcast day content with reading my new poetry book. My being felt content, complete, whole. The minds around me were just a drone as I read the pages at human past. I was to get off at the second stop; with one more stop before mine. The train came to a halt, my ears could hear the inner workings of the locomotive keening and creaking to slow to a halt. I didn't look up from my book but I heard four people walk on, but then I noticed that I could only read three of those four minds. My head shot up impulsively and turned to watch the passengers walk by. I took in there scent one by one on instinct, the silent mind belonged to a small brown haired girl. She was clumsy as she walked down the aisle bumping into people and earning a few disapproving grunts. I couldn't quit catch her scent until she walked by me. It all happened so fast, she bumped into my book that was placed on the edge of my seat, she bent down to get it and that's when her scent hit me. My nostrils flared and my throat burned like someone had poured lava down it. I immediately stopped breathing and bit back a growl. I was very still as she handed me back my book. When she met my eyes fear became very blatant across her face. No doubt she was looking at my eyes that would be pitch black right now making me look unworldly. Some small part of my mind made me say thank you. Needless to say I dropped the book on the ground and walked out of that train before the doors could close.

I had fled Chicago that night after much deliberation on tracking that tasty treat down and sucking her dry, or sparing her life. I chose the latter option because I didn't want to become that monster and what wrong had she done. Nothing to deserve such a grisly end to her human existence!

I refused to kill a human again no matter how tempting her blood was to me.

Kill, kill, kill! Just one taste…

No!

So here I lay in a snow drift in Alaska trying to figure out what I needed to do. How could I tell my family that I couldn't come and live with them once they moved to Chicago, I was the reason they were moving there.

Every couple of years my family will select one of our human birth places to move to. I was born in Chicago in 1901 and this time it was my birth home we were moving to. Now this human girl who smells like heaven to me is standing in my way of being happy with my family. I know they would understand if I told them that I wished not to live there but they would wonder why. I feel if I told them about this girl they may see me as weak and pity me. I didn't need their pity, I needed them to understand.

I had been lying face down for about two hours and it had begun to snow, I knew I should get up but I just wanted to stay. She wasn't here to ignite the burn and I could think clearly.

If I went back could I stand not tracking her down and letting the monster take over?

I wasn't one hundred percent sure, but what made me think was that I had enough control to not take her life on the train. Maybe if I returned and made sure to never ride that train again and keep a watch out for her through other people's minds….

That made me stop short in my thought process, I didn't know what she really looked like.

My mind had registered fear on her face, she was my prey and fear had excited me. But my mind hadn't registered and retained what she looked like; it didn't matter at that time. All that mattered to the predator in me was that she was afraid and that it knew what she smelt like.

I pounded my fists into the snow driving my arms deeper into the cold earth.

What to do, what to do.

My face was buried in the snow so I didn't smell her coming, and her mind didn't register in my head due to the turmoil that was inside, and she walked without sound in the snow.

"Edward?" She kicked my shoe lightly.

I didn't move.

"Come on now, get up." She purred.

I could just see the teasing look her face would wear.

Before I could react she was on top of my back tickling me.

Yes, we can feel touch and have nerve endings that can be tickled.

I gasped and turned onto my back grabbing her wrists in my hands.

Kate.

Her golden eyes shown back at mine as we both laughed. All the tension in my body left and I forgot about the girl.

My best friend was straddling my lap laughing and I couldn't help but smile.

Kate was one of the Denali sisters and really the only one that I liked. She and I shared a love of books and music. I had never once felt the pull of desire towards her and she felt like wise towards me, but we still built a strong bond in friendship.

I was so happy she was the one to find me in the snow.

Tanya and Irina on the other hand would have made for a very bad situation, one I would gladly avoid.

"Something is bothering you, isn't it?"

By her thoughts I could see my own face reflected in her mind.

My signature crooked smile didn't fully reach its height and my eyes looked lost, sorrowful.

I sighed and motioned for her to get up. I released her wrists and drew my knees to my chest hugging them.

"I don't know how to begin Kate….I guess you could say I am in trouble."

I didn't try and pry into Kate's mind out of respect; I liked having conversations with her not knowing what she was about to say. I had taught her how to block me and I told her how I liked when she did that when we talked, she liked the idea too.

She sat down next to me folding her legs under her and she began to rub my back in a comforting manner.

"Well the easiest way to begin is to start from the beginning." Her voice had lost the teasing tone to it.

I closed my eyes and focused on her hand on my back willing my throat not to scorch as I rehashed the story to her.

My throat still burned….

Kate was silent for what seemed like ages but it was only seconds.

She withdrew her hand from my back and placed it on my arm, willing me to look at her.

I reluctantly looked up; I didn't try and hide my feelings on my face.

I'm sure I looked like a corned wild animal, but I didn't care. I trusted Kate, she was my best friend after all.

She sighed and pulled me into a hug. "Edward, I've never been in the same boat as you are in with a human but one some level I can understand what you are feeling."

She released me and looked off into the dark woods, I knew this story that she was about to tell me. I had seen it played over in her sisters minds, it wasn't a happy one.

"His name was Daniel, and he was very precious to me. I had met him in a lodge that my sisters and I were staying at. His smell wasn't as potent to me as your girl is, but I was drawn to him. We became lovers and I had plans to tell him what I was and to change him, but fate drew cruel a cruel hand for Daniel. I had gone off to hunt with my sisters and Daniel was left at the house…alone. Laurent stopped by and was overcome by thirst and killed my Daniel, he couldn't help himself, but I will never forgive him for taking away my mate. Daniel was Laurent's singer.." She choked back a sob but quickly composed herself.

"So on a level I know what you are going through, what surprises me is how well you had control over yourself." Her curious gaze turned towards mine.

"Yes, but I don't know if I could stop myself again." I groaned out through clenched teeth.

"My dear friend, you doubt yourself so. You are stronger than you think, if I had your control I wouldn't let a tiny insignificant human stand in my way of happiness with my family." Her voice was strong and compelling.

I ran my hand through my chaotic hair willing myself to be strong enough for my family.

"Edward, like Albert Einstein once said. Once was accept our limits we go beyond them. You need to accept in your mind that she is your kryptonite, then you can go beyond the urge and be strong."

She had a point, I could do this!

I am Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, I am a powerful vampire! No puny human will control me, I will not give her the unknown satisfaction of ruining my abstinence from killing humans.

Kill her, suck her dry!

NO! I will not bow to that urge.

I turned to Kate, she met my gaze taking in my expression.

She nodded a silent approval.

She jumped up and was in front of me holding out her hand with an excited glint to her eyes.

"Well if you are heading back soon, I do believe you should hunt."

I took her hand and pulled her into a hug.

"Thank you my friend." And before she could say another word I was racing off into the woods hooting and hollering in joy.

I could sense that she was right behind me so I slowed down a bit, I had always been the fastest one and I have yet to meet a vampire that could catch me.

We speed on side by side laughing and smiling at each other.

I felt free and giddy.

We both caught the scent of caribou and slowed to a walk we would be on them soon.

"Ladies first." I bowed and extended my arm out to the herd in the distance.

Kate giggled and stalked towards the herd. She singled out a crippled female, not wanting to take out any of the mothers with young.

I watched her hunt she was graceful and wicked all at the same time. She took down the injured female and made quick work of her.

After she was done I went to work singling out a buck that was on the outskirts of the herd.

His ears swiveled at my approach and his head shot up and turned blindly towards my direction. He was almost blind in the dark, but I could see him clearly as if it were day.

I wanted him to run from me so I made sure my feet crunched in the snow. When the prey ran adrenaline would release into their blood stream giving the bland blood a sweet taste.

Venom pooled in my mouth and my body became coiled. I hissed and that made the herd scatter, I took off after the buck.

He was in my grasp within seconds and my teeth sank into his neck. The buck's blood ran over my tongue putting out the burn in my throat.

All too soon the hunt was over and Kate and I were walking home. We laughed and threw snow balls back and forth at each other, I felt like a kid again.

I had been gravitating back towards my car wanting to get back to Chicago, the drive would be a long one but I knew that when I got back my family would already be moved into our new home.

I had sent them a text telling them that I had went to visit Kate and that I would be back soon. They didn't ask any questions because it was normal for me to visit the sisters.

Kate and I stood in an embrace beside my car, neither of us wanted to part but both of us knowing we must.

"You come back and visit soon, alright?" She stepped back and smiled at me.

"I promise I will be back to visit." I gave her a toothy grin.

She laughed and showed me images of her sisters.

"I may or may not come and visit them; it depends on how much patience I have on that given day." I chuckled and fished my keys out of my pocket.

She stepped forward and kissed both of my cheeks "Until we meet again my dear friend." And then she was gone.

I got into the car and scrubbed my face, I didn't want to drive home. I would be so much faster to just run on foot, but I didn't want to leave my car to fend for itself.

Shoving the key into the ignition I started driving back to Chicago, I had a weird feeling that something was about to change.

Please tell me what you think!

Thank you!