A/N Some information before you start reading:

- Story is located in Toronto, Canada
- Gilbert, Arthur, Francis, Antonio, Ivan: seniors/Grade 12 (17-18 yrs.)
- Matthew, Alfred, Ludwig, Feliciano, Lovino, Kiku: juniors/Grade 11 (15-16 yrs.)
- Tino, Berwald, Katyusha: Teachers
- In Canada, most students go straight to University after high school. Universities only look at your Grade 11 and Grade 12 years of high school.
- Car insurance is hella expensive

Other ages of characters later introduced in the story will be said before their chapters. Enjoy!

[Matthew's P.O.V]

Hello, my name is motherfucking Matthew Williams and I am motherfucking pissed because of motherfucking Alfred Jones, my motherfucking brother who is a motherfucking asshat.

You know that feeling when you just want to get run over by a truck a few multiple times? Yeah, that's how I'm feeling right now, all thanks of Alfred motherfucking Jones.

Now don't go thinking that I'm just being a cunt because you don't know the whole story.

This whole shit storm started because Alfred and I loved to give each other dares. When we turned 16, we made a deal when we both got our drivers licenses and had to share a car. The deal was that we couldn't disagree to any bet, or else we had to pay the others car insurance for the rest of our lives. I thought that it was a good idea, since he legit sucked serious ass at the dares I've given him over the years.

However, I forgot that Alfred F. Jones was the type of bastard who could do fucking anything once he set his mind to it. As soon as we made that deal, that bastard was doing everything that I told him to! Right down to flashing the principal!

So, yesterday I dared him to get Arthur Kirkland, an English 12th grade student –as well as the principals' son– to willingly kiss Alfred.

That Brit is a total priss with trust issues and large eyebrows. He's the kind of guy that feels the need to complain about every fucking thing wrong in everyone. The guy's a fucking control freak (but I can't say I don't love him...)!

So as "payback" (Even though I was helping him, everyone and their mother knows about their sexual tension!), he dared me to get this guy named Gilbert Bielschmidt, A.K.A Mr. Popular, A.K.A That cocky Albino… to fall in love with me.

Yeah that's right, fucking fall in love with me! Matthew Williams! That four-eyed pussy who can't even speak in front of the class because of he probably has a serious case of anxiety! The one who can think the talk, but can't actually talk that fucking talk! The one who isn't even noticed by anyone?

Not to mention, Gilbert's in Grade 12 while I'm in fucking Grade 11. Who even talks to people who aren't in their grade?

Houston, I have a fucking problem here!

Okay I see that look in your eye. That look saying "Matthew, it's no big deal, just pay Alfred's car insurance." Sorry, but have you seen Alfred's driving? A monkey can drive better than him! I don't know about you, but I do not want to be held responsible for the payments of his future murders.

So yeah, I'm basically fucked.

Motherfucking Alfred, just run me over a truck before I decide to run you over instead.