(It's 7am in the McMahon house and Steph and Shane are in bed, Vince comes
in both their bedrooms).
Vince: (Shouting) Get up dammit!, school today.
(He walks out and storms downstairs).
(Steph and Shane get ready for school and go downstairs, Vince is on the phone).
Vince: I'm Vince McMahon, Dammit!
(He slams the phone down).
(Everyone gets their breakfast.)
Linda: time to go kids.
(They get on the bus and go to school, in the house Vince is still saying dammit to everything).
(We cut to a classroom in a school, when Ric Flair walks in and sits down at the desk, he starts calling the names out.)
Mr. Flair: Steve Austin. Whoooooo.
Austin: What?
(The whole class says 'what' afterwards.)
Flair: Rock
Rock: finally the rock has come back to school
Flair: Angle
Angle: here, hi, I'm Kurt, Olympic gold medallist, 3 time WWE champion Euro- continental champion, tag team ch..
(Rock cuts him off in mid-sentence).
Rock: whoa, whoa, whoa, Kurt we don't want to here your life story if you don't me to turn my shoe sideways and stick it straight up your candy ass, shut up, if you smell what the rock is cooking.
Austin: if you want Angle to shut up give me a hell yeah.
All (except Angle): hell yeah.
(Kurt runs out crying).
Flair: Everyone wooo settle down, Booker T
Booker: Tell me you didn't just say that
(He gets up and does the spinarooni on the floor.)
Flair: sit down
Booker: are you talking to me sucka
(Booker sits down).
Flair: HHH
HHH: Here, that is because I am that damn good.
(He spits water everywhere.)
(The bell rings).
(Out in the corridor Principal Vince McMahon is out in the corridor when he sees Spike Dudley being bullied by HHH and Randy Orton, HHH is just about to pedigree Spike when..)
Vince: (Shouting) HHH, Orton what are you doing dammit!
HHH: Hey Vince.
Vince (still shouting) don't ever hey Vince me, you're both on detention.
(In another part of the school Bubba and D-Von Dudley are arguing with a student, Bubba loses his temper).
Bubba: D-Von, get the table
(D-Von goes into a classroom and comes out with a table, he puts it down, bubba kicks and punches the student who is standing there half conscious. Bubba gets hold of him and powerbombs the student through the table. They both walk off).
(In his office Principal McMahon hears about what just happened).
Vince: That's another person they have done that to.
Vince goes to look for Bubba and D-Von, Outside Edge is making fun of Kurt.
Edge: you are so totally uncool, you Olympic loser.
Kurt: I am, did you know that I'm a 3 time WWE Champion.
Edge: yeah, you so totally suck.
(Kurt storms off).
(Vince Finds Bubba and D-Von.)
Vince: what are you doing dammit, putting people through tables.
Bubba: what are you going to do old man
(This makes Vince angrier.)
Vince: I'm going to suspend you two indefinitely.
Bubba: you can't do that, you old bastard
Vince: D-Von your suspended, and Bubba, YOU'RE EXPELLED (in the your fired voice), bubba get out of my school, I own it, you don't belong here.
(Bubba leaves.)
(The bell rings for dinner).
(In the dining hall, Austin is getting asked what he wants for dinner by Chef Howard Finkel).
Fink: what do you want for dinner.
Austin: What?
Fink: what do you want.
Austin: What? (Louder), What? (Even louder).
(Austin gets his dinner and sits down).
(JR sits on the same table as Austin).
JR: is there any BBQ sauce.
Austin: What?
(HHH sits down, JR asks the same question, HHH answers).
HHH: No JR.
JR: Damn.
(On another table is sitting The Rock, Chris Jericho and Booker T, Austin saying 'What?' can be heard all through the dining hall).
Chris:(Shouts over at Austin) will you please shut the hell up.
Austin: (Shouting Over) What?
Chris: I am a living legend.
Rock: whoa, whoa, whoa, no Chris you are not a legend, The Rock is one, (everyone chants 'Rocky'), you see Chris, The Rock has been here longer than you, had more achievements than you, and The Rock is better than you, if you smelllll what the rock is cooking (Rock then raises the eyebrow).
(Steph walks over).
Steph: hi rock.
Rock: oh look everyone, it's the billion dollar slut.
(The Rocky chants continue).
Booker: Tell me you did not just say that.
Rock: The Rock just said it.
(Steph runs off crying).
(10 minutes later Vince walks in).
Vince:(Shouting) where is The Rock Dammit!
Rock: Over here jabroni.
(Vince walks over).
Vince: what did you call my daughter, dammit.
Rock: Ask Stephanie, yourself.
(Vince goes out and asks Steph, he comes back in looking furious).
Vince: you're on 6 months detention.
(Vince walks off, but Rock catches up to him and gives Vince a Rock Bottom on a cafeteria table).
Vince: A years detention.
(Rock gives Vince the peoples elbow).
Vince: 2 years detention.
Rock: Vince, do you really think The Rock is going to do detention for you.
Vince: its Sir what you call me, not Vince, dammit!
(Vince leaves angry. Everyone is still chanting 'Rocky').
(After dinner, everyone is congratulating Rock on what he done).
Rock: the people just saw The Rock whip Vince McMahon's ass all over this School.
(In Walks Mr Hulk Hogan, the school wrestling teacher).
Hogan: Rock, I just heard what you done.
Rock: The Rock says that Vince McMahon is a jackass.
Austin: If you think Vince is a jackass give me a hell yeah.
All: Hell yeah!
Hogan: damn right.
Austin: What?
(They all leave for afternoon classes).
(In Michael Cole's class.)
MC: Hurricane.
Hurricane: here citizen Cole.
MC: Regal.
Storm: he's off ill
MC: Saturn (left him in for comedy lines)
Saturn: children go to school so they can be educated, you're welcome
MC: OK, Funaki
Funaki: the Smackdown #1 announcer is here.
MC: Lance Storm
Storm: can I be serious for-
Austin: (outside) What?
(MC goes outside)
MC: shouldn't you be in class
Austin: What?
(Austin walks off).
(Later on.)
(Everyone is on recess).
Hurricane: stand back, theres a hurricane coming through
Everyone: aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Everyone runs off)
Hurricane: I did not mean that type of hurricane
(Everyone resumes to what they were doing.)
Hurricane: citizen Austin, come to class.
Austin: What?
(Austin suddenly starts drinking beer, Vince sees)
Vince: AUSTIN, AUSTIN WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING. Drinking is not allowed in school.
Austin: What?
(He staggers around then trips over and knocks himself out).
Saturn: children don't drink because they see funny things when they do
(Everyone looks at him.)
Saturn: you're welcome.
(5 minutes later and Austin is lying unconscious on a stretcher being carried away).
(After school later that afternoon..)
Vince: (over intercom) before you all go there will be some new students starting tomorrow.
(the bell rings and everybody leaves to go home)
Who will the new students be, find out in chapter 2, soon to be published.
Vince: (Shouting) Get up dammit!, school today.
(He walks out and storms downstairs).
(Steph and Shane get ready for school and go downstairs, Vince is on the phone).
Vince: I'm Vince McMahon, Dammit!
(He slams the phone down).
(Everyone gets their breakfast.)
Linda: time to go kids.
(They get on the bus and go to school, in the house Vince is still saying dammit to everything).
(We cut to a classroom in a school, when Ric Flair walks in and sits down at the desk, he starts calling the names out.)
Mr. Flair: Steve Austin. Whoooooo.
Austin: What?
(The whole class says 'what' afterwards.)
Flair: Rock
Rock: finally the rock has come back to school
Flair: Angle
Angle: here, hi, I'm Kurt, Olympic gold medallist, 3 time WWE champion Euro- continental champion, tag team ch..
(Rock cuts him off in mid-sentence).
Rock: whoa, whoa, whoa, Kurt we don't want to here your life story if you don't me to turn my shoe sideways and stick it straight up your candy ass, shut up, if you smell what the rock is cooking.
Austin: if you want Angle to shut up give me a hell yeah.
All (except Angle): hell yeah.
(Kurt runs out crying).
Flair: Everyone wooo settle down, Booker T
Booker: Tell me you didn't just say that
(He gets up and does the spinarooni on the floor.)
Flair: sit down
Booker: are you talking to me sucka
(Booker sits down).
Flair: HHH
HHH: Here, that is because I am that damn good.
(He spits water everywhere.)
(The bell rings).
(Out in the corridor Principal Vince McMahon is out in the corridor when he sees Spike Dudley being bullied by HHH and Randy Orton, HHH is just about to pedigree Spike when..)
Vince: (Shouting) HHH, Orton what are you doing dammit!
HHH: Hey Vince.
Vince (still shouting) don't ever hey Vince me, you're both on detention.
(In another part of the school Bubba and D-Von Dudley are arguing with a student, Bubba loses his temper).
Bubba: D-Von, get the table
(D-Von goes into a classroom and comes out with a table, he puts it down, bubba kicks and punches the student who is standing there half conscious. Bubba gets hold of him and powerbombs the student through the table. They both walk off).
(In his office Principal McMahon hears about what just happened).
Vince: That's another person they have done that to.
Vince goes to look for Bubba and D-Von, Outside Edge is making fun of Kurt.
Edge: you are so totally uncool, you Olympic loser.
Kurt: I am, did you know that I'm a 3 time WWE Champion.
Edge: yeah, you so totally suck.
(Kurt storms off).
(Vince Finds Bubba and D-Von.)
Vince: what are you doing dammit, putting people through tables.
Bubba: what are you going to do old man
(This makes Vince angrier.)
Vince: I'm going to suspend you two indefinitely.
Bubba: you can't do that, you old bastard
Vince: D-Von your suspended, and Bubba, YOU'RE EXPELLED (in the your fired voice), bubba get out of my school, I own it, you don't belong here.
(Bubba leaves.)
(The bell rings for dinner).
(In the dining hall, Austin is getting asked what he wants for dinner by Chef Howard Finkel).
Fink: what do you want for dinner.
Austin: What?
Fink: what do you want.
Austin: What? (Louder), What? (Even louder).
(Austin gets his dinner and sits down).
(JR sits on the same table as Austin).
JR: is there any BBQ sauce.
Austin: What?
(HHH sits down, JR asks the same question, HHH answers).
HHH: No JR.
JR: Damn.
(On another table is sitting The Rock, Chris Jericho and Booker T, Austin saying 'What?' can be heard all through the dining hall).
Chris:(Shouts over at Austin) will you please shut the hell up.
Austin: (Shouting Over) What?
Chris: I am a living legend.
Rock: whoa, whoa, whoa, no Chris you are not a legend, The Rock is one, (everyone chants 'Rocky'), you see Chris, The Rock has been here longer than you, had more achievements than you, and The Rock is better than you, if you smelllll what the rock is cooking (Rock then raises the eyebrow).
(Steph walks over).
Steph: hi rock.
Rock: oh look everyone, it's the billion dollar slut.
(The Rocky chants continue).
Booker: Tell me you did not just say that.
Rock: The Rock just said it.
(Steph runs off crying).
(10 minutes later Vince walks in).
Vince:(Shouting) where is The Rock Dammit!
Rock: Over here jabroni.
(Vince walks over).
Vince: what did you call my daughter, dammit.
Rock: Ask Stephanie, yourself.
(Vince goes out and asks Steph, he comes back in looking furious).
Vince: you're on 6 months detention.
(Vince walks off, but Rock catches up to him and gives Vince a Rock Bottom on a cafeteria table).
Vince: A years detention.
(Rock gives Vince the peoples elbow).
Vince: 2 years detention.
Rock: Vince, do you really think The Rock is going to do detention for you.
Vince: its Sir what you call me, not Vince, dammit!
(Vince leaves angry. Everyone is still chanting 'Rocky').
(After dinner, everyone is congratulating Rock on what he done).
Rock: the people just saw The Rock whip Vince McMahon's ass all over this School.
(In Walks Mr Hulk Hogan, the school wrestling teacher).
Hogan: Rock, I just heard what you done.
Rock: The Rock says that Vince McMahon is a jackass.
Austin: If you think Vince is a jackass give me a hell yeah.
All: Hell yeah!
Hogan: damn right.
Austin: What?
(They all leave for afternoon classes).
(In Michael Cole's class.)
MC: Hurricane.
Hurricane: here citizen Cole.
MC: Regal.
Storm: he's off ill
MC: Saturn (left him in for comedy lines)
Saturn: children go to school so they can be educated, you're welcome
MC: OK, Funaki
Funaki: the Smackdown #1 announcer is here.
MC: Lance Storm
Storm: can I be serious for-
Austin: (outside) What?
(MC goes outside)
MC: shouldn't you be in class
Austin: What?
(Austin walks off).
(Later on.)
(Everyone is on recess).
Hurricane: stand back, theres a hurricane coming through
Everyone: aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Everyone runs off)
Hurricane: I did not mean that type of hurricane
(Everyone resumes to what they were doing.)
Hurricane: citizen Austin, come to class.
Austin: What?
(Austin suddenly starts drinking beer, Vince sees)
Vince: AUSTIN, AUSTIN WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING. Drinking is not allowed in school.
Austin: What?
(He staggers around then trips over and knocks himself out).
Saturn: children don't drink because they see funny things when they do
(Everyone looks at him.)
Saturn: you're welcome.
(5 minutes later and Austin is lying unconscious on a stretcher being carried away).
(After school later that afternoon..)
Vince: (over intercom) before you all go there will be some new students starting tomorrow.
(the bell rings and everybody leaves to go home)
Who will the new students be, find out in chapter 2, soon to be published.