Folks, you can blame Joee for this digression from "Returning from the Dead." Joee has been keen for me to follow up on an episode in which Glorfindel advises Anomen to ask Erestor about the source of the milk that nourishes newborn elflings. In this story, Anomen and the other elflings get their answer. As for "Returning from the Dead," the next chapter is nearly complete and should be posted by midweek.
Vocabulary
ecthel—'point'
laes—'babe'
tachol—'pin'
After a vigorous afternoon of training with sword and bow, Elladan, Elrohir, and Anomen had betaken themselves to a pond both to bathe and to play. After splashing about vigorously for awhile, Anomen was floating comfortably upon his back, gazing up at the clouds. They reminded him of the creatures that came wafting from Mithrandir's lips as he puffed upon his pipe.
"There's a dragon," he thought dreamily. "And that's Glorfindel's great stallion. Oh, and yonder is a seagull soaring upon the wind."
At that moment, a breeze blew across the pond. Anomen shivered and glanced down at his body.
"I wonder what those are for," he said idly.
"What?" said Elladan, paddling closer.
"The pair of nubs on our chests. Eyes are for seeing, noses for smelling, mouths for eating, ears for hearing. We use our hands for grasping, we run with our legs, and we make water with the ecthel.
"The tachol in your case," snickered Elrohir, who had by now swum near.
Anomen sent a plume of water in his direction.
"Seriously, Elrohir. Why do we have these nubs if they don't do anything?"
"Actually," said Elladan, "you can get them to do something."
"What?" chorused Anomen and Elrohir together.
"If you rub them, they grow——it's kind of fun, really. Gives you a shiver."
"Oh, that," scoffed Elrohir. "That's nothing. I have discovered that if you rub, um, if you rub…." Elrohir trailed off.
"What!?" cried Anomen and Elladan.
Elrohir had gone red all the way to the tip of his pointed ears.
"Never mind," he muttered and then dove under the water. When he resurfaced, Elladan and Anomen were still in earnest discussion over the mysterious nubs.
"But Erestor is our tutor," Anomen was arguing. "Who better to ask than our tutor?"
"He is our tutor, yes," agreed Elladan, "but if a question isn't on his list of topics——the scroll he calls the curriculum——you know very well that he won't agree to spend time on it. He'll probably scold us to boot, or maybe even set us an essay on 'Why I should not try to distract my master from questions that really matter'."
"But the curriculum covers 'natural history', does it not," Anomen pointed out.
"Ye-es."
"Natural history," declaimed Anomen in his best imitation of Erestor, "encompasses, among other matters, the study of living creatures——their anatomy, their diets, their behavior."
"So?" said Elladan stubbornly
"So, troll-brain, we are living creatures, correct?"
"Yes."
"We have anatomies, correct?"
"Yes."
"Our anatomies include these nubs, correct?"
Elladan sighed.
"Yes."
"Ergo," declared Anomen triumphantly, "anatomy encompasses the study of these nubs!"
Elrohir had now swum near again.
"Anomen," he said slyly. "I am impressed by your reasoning."
Anomen was instantly on guard.
"And?" he said cautiously.
"By your reasoning, every single part of our body would be included in the study of anatomy."
"Ye-es?"
"Ergo, I dare you to ask Erestor about——"
"No!" shouted Anomen and Elladan simultaneously.
"You know very well, Elrohir," said Elladan indignantly, "that Erestor will have each of us fill an entire scroll with the sentence 'I shall not be impertinent'. We will be copying till the turn of the moon!"
"Oh, very well," grumbled Elrohir. "But I hope, Anomen," he added, brightening, "that you do ask him about those nubs. I can't see any harm in it, and it will distract him for a time. It will probably take him at least an hour to explain why he won't explain."
"I don't agree," replied Elladan. "It may take him an hour, but he'll get the lost time back in spades by assigning us that essay."
"I think Elrohir is right," said Anomen. "For once," he added, grinning.
Anomen rolled over unto his stomach and swam for the shore. Once there, he hauled himself onto the bank and seized Elrohir and Elladan's clothes, waving them tauntingly in the air.
"Do you remember how you stole my clothes whilst I was swimming?"
"Which time?" Elrohir called back cheerfully.
"The time I became trapped in a badger hole."
"Well, nobody told you to go crawling into a badger hole," shouted Elladan.
"You know very well that I was hiding from Arwen so she wouldn't see me naked."
"Oh," retorted Elrohir, "you shouldn't have minded so much being seen naked."
"Ah, if that is case," Anomen shot back, "then I guess it wouldn't bother you to have to walk back to the Hall in your natal garment."
"Uh oh, Elrohir, I guess we walked right into that one," moaned Elladan.
"Swam into it, is more like it," muttered Elrohir.
His point made, Anomen tossed the clothes back on to the bank and began to pull on his own. Elladan and Elrohir soon joined him, and the three, chattering happily, made for the Hall. The sun and their own stomachs told them that supper drew near.
At breakfast next morning Elrond noticed that the three young Elves were more animated than usual. The elflings always shimmered with energy, but today they wriggled and jostled as if in anticipation of some great celebration. They were also whispering, which was frowned upon at table only a little less than wearing one's hood. Elrond cleared his throat.
"Erestor," he said, "I hope your pupils have been acquitting themselves honorably in the classroom."
The table fell silent. All heads swiveled toward the venerable tutor, who, delighted at the audience, began to smugly hold forth upon the progress of his students. After a few minutes of this, Elrond interrupted gently.
"I am glad to hear that they are doing well," he said, "and I trust that they will continue to do so."
As the Lord of Imladris uttered this final sentiment, he stared hard at the threesome under discussion. The elflings dropped their eyes and studied their plates. Later, as they walked together toward the library in the wake of their tutor, Elladan whispered, "Anomen, I don't think you'd better ask about those nubs."
"Nonsense," objected Elrohir softly. "Anomen would be doing well to ask about them. The question will show his curiosity in the subject matter. Erestor ought to be pleased. Hasn't he been telling us we should demonstrate more interest in our studies?"
Both the elflings looked at Anomen. Suddenly that elfling felt reckless. After all, he had faced Orcs and wargs. What was a tutor compared to such foes?
"I am going to ask," he declared.
Elladan looked appalled; Elrohir looked excited. Either they would get an answer, which would be interesting, or Erestor would be horrified which would be——interesting.
The first portion of the morning was devoted to mastering Westron grammar.
"Now you must understand," lectured Erestor, "that Men have developed a very convoluted——not to say awkward!——way of conveying tense. This is to be expected, as they are Men and so of course do not come at things from the elven point of view. In today's lesson, we will cover the simplepresentandsimplepast. We will also be covering the presentprogressivepastprogressiveandfutureprogressive. Of course, no study of Westron grammar would be complete without an examination of the presentperfectpastperfectandfutureperfect, not to mention the present-perfectprogressivepast-perfectprogressiveandfuture-perfectprogressive. We will leave until the morrow," the tutor added, "our investigation of future time shown via use of the modal."
The eyes of each elfling had glazed over, and of course Erestor could not tell if they were sleeping or daydreaming. He rapped upon his desk. The elflings jumped, and their eyes came back into focus.
"Master Erestor," exclaimed Anomen impetuously, "I have a question."
Erestor looked at him fondly.
"About the simple, progressive, or perfect tense, my lad?"
"None of those, Master Erestor!"
"Now, now, Anomen," said Erestor kindly, "you'll only confuse yourself if you ask about the modal. You mustn't get ahead of yourself, you know!"
"It's not about that, Master Erestor. It's about——nubs!"
"Nubs?"
"The nubs on our chests."
"The nubs on your chests?"
"Yes, Master Erestor. Why do we have nubs on our chests?"
"Whatever are you talking about!?"
"Oh, bother," muttered Elrohir. He arose and yanked up his tunic.
"These nubs, Master Erestor! That's what Anomen means!"
"Yes!" exclaimed Elladan, likewise leaping up and lifting his tunic. "The only thing they do is swell a bit if you rub them. Whatever are they for?"
Erestor gasped.
"Elladan, you mustn't rub your nubs!"
"Why not, Master Erestor," asked the bewildered elfling.
"Because, because——if you do you'll damage your eyesight! You'll see no better than a Man!"
Now it was the elflings' turn to gasp. Elrohir was particularly horrified. He looked as pale as a wraith.
"Um, Master Erestor," he said nervously, "if nub-rubbing damages your eyesight, what will happen if you, if you, um if you——"
"You'll go blind altogether!" exclaimed Erestor. "Elrohir, how could you!?"
"Well, you never covered the matter under Natural History," whined Elrohir. "How were we to know!?"
Elrohir had a point, Erestor realized. However, he firmly believed that it would not be in keeping with the dignity of an instructor to make such an admission.
"You know now," he growled. "And just so you never forget, each of you take out a scroll. I want to you to copy the sentence, 'I will not rub my nubs or anything else'. You may not stop until you have filled both sides of the scroll——and you needn't write in extra large letters or leave spaces between the lines. If you do, I'll make you start all over again with a fresh scroll!"
Anomen and Elladan shot accusing looks at Elrohir, but he was too miserable to notice. He was busy rubbing his eyes and squinting at various objects to see how clear they appeared.
"Next time I will steal his clothes," Anomen muttered to Elladan.
"And I'll help you," Elladan whispered back.
When the time came for the noon meal, Erestor sent a message informing Elrond that the elflings had been unavoidably detained. ("Have been detained," muttered Erestor as he wrote, "present-perfect progressive. Passive, of course.") The hungry elflings were only dismissed in order to allow them to make a dash to the training fields for weapons practice. They arrived on time, but just barely. Glorfindel glowered at them as, panting for breath, they took their places on the archery line.
"Arriving on time means being prepared to start your lesson," he growled. "I do not know how you expect to be able to aim accurately when you are gasping for breath!"
Anomen was feeling rather desperate.
"Lord Glorindel," he said, "don't you think elflings ought to be allowed to ask questions?"
"You have just done so," retorted the balrog-slayer. Then, noticing how woeful Anomen looked, he softened his manner.
"Would I be correct in assuming that you asked Lord Erestor a question that he did not appreciate? Which of course accounts for your absence from the noon meal. You were being punished, were you not?"
"Yes, Lord Glorfindel," Anomen said miserably.
"What did you ask?"
Anomen hesitated. The three elflings looked at each other.
"Um, your pardon, Lord Glorfindel," said Elladan nervously, "but if we tell you, won't you punish us, too?"
"I am your weapons-master. I punish you for an altogether different set of transgressions than does your tutor."
This was true, as the elflings had good reason to know.
Anomen took a deep breath.
"We wanted to know what nubs are for."
"Nubs?"
Elrohir sighed resignedly. Here they went again. He pulled up his tunic and pointed.
"We each have a pair of these on our chest and can't figure out what they are good for."
"Yes," chimed in Elladan. "They don't seem to do much of anything, um, under ordinary circumstances, that is."
"Oh, you may find them useful when you get older," said Glorfindel, smiling. "The elf-maidens surely will find them handy, but many male Elves will as well, although for different reasons."
The elflings stared at him. Eyes, ears, noses, mouths, hands, legs, yes, even the ecthel, were useful right now. Whatever would those little nubs ever be good for?
Glorfindel was chuckling, apparently over some memory.
"Do you know," he said at last, "that Lord Erestor used to have the nickname 'Erector'? ——but, if I were you," he warned, "I wouldn't let on that you know that!"
'Erector'? What an odd nickname!
"Anomen, do you remember that you had to drink milk when you journeyed with me to Bree?"
Yes, Anomen remembered, and he also recalled how surprised he had been when Glorfindel told him that the liquid in his cup came from cows. Glorfindel also had said that as a laes Anomen had undoubtedly lived on milk but that the milk he had had at that time would not have come from cows. An elven baby is a rare creature, and Anomen had no first hand knowledge of how one was raised (not even an Elf can remember his own infancy!). He had wondered then, and he wondered now, where the milk had come from if not from cows. Glorfindel had told him to ask Erestor, but he hadn't and now he would never dare. He sighed. Milk would have to remain a mystery. Unless….
"Lord Glorfindel," he pleaded, "you told me to ask Lord Erestor about the source of the milk that baby elflings drink, but you know very well that he will never answer such a question."
"Oh, but surely such a topic falls under the heading of Natural History, does it not?" teased Glorfindel.
Anomen had a sudden inspiration.
"Lord Glorfindel, if I ask that question, I am sure that Lord Erestor will set us to copying every day for months. We will forever be rushing late to the fields. We will be perpetually out of breath, and we will not do credit to your excellent instruction!"
Glorfindel chuckled again. Such clever reasoning demanded a response.
"I am your riding master as well as your weapons-master, am I not?"
"Yes, Lord Glorfindel," chorused the elflings.
"As your question pertains to horses, I believe I am qualified to answer it."
The elflings stared at one another. How had they gotten onto the subject of horses?
"As you know, horses, like Elves, come in two forms: the male or stallion, and the female or mare."
"Three forms," said Elladan. "There is also the gelding."
"The gelding," replied Glorfindel, "is naught but a stallion with some parts removed. For our purposes, we shall agree that horses have but two genders."
The elflings nodded.
"As you also know, mares give birth to foals, and the foals do not at first eat grass. Isn't that so, Anomen?"
"Yes. The mares sustain their foals. They pass on their strength by allowing the foals to suckle."
"Excellent. Now what is it, exactly, that the mares pass on to the foals?"
"I have said so. Their strength."
"Hmm. Tell me, Anomen, how can the mare pass on her strength to her foal? Does not the mare's strength reside in her muscles?"
"Yes."
"Do the mare's muscles dwindle as the foal suckles?"
"No. But Erestor said that strength was what flowed between the mare and the foal."
"That's Lord Erestor to you. Anomen, you must understand that Lord Erestor is a master of metaphor. It is true that, metaphorically speaking, strength flows from mare to foal. In addition, however, a liquid passes between the two."
"Milk!" shouted Elladan triumphantly.
"Yes, Elladan, milk."
"But a horse is not a cow," argued Anomen.
"All creatures that grow fur feed their newborns with milk from their bodies. The deer, the wolves, the squirrels, the mice, even the bat."
"Lord Glorfindel," said Elrohir slowly. "We braid our horses' manes as we do our hair. Is hair a kind of fur?"
"Yes, Elrohir, it is."
"Sooo," continued Elrohir, "we are creatures that grow fur."
"That is correct."
"So we feed our newborns with milk exactly the way horses do."
"That is also correct."
The truth was beginning to dawn upon Anomen.
"Glorfindel, is a nub the same thing as a teat?"
"Exactly, although, when we refer to Elves, we usually call them 'nipples'."
"So when the elf-maidens grow up, um, they will, ah——"
"Some of them will suckle infants, Anomen."
Anomen suddenly recognized that there was a gap in this story, at least as far as his own infancy was concerned.
"Lord Glorfindel, my mother died when I was born."
"I am sorry to hear that, Anomen."
The elfling realized then that he had let slip a secret that he had been carefully guarding. The more details that emerged about his past, the more likely he would be discovered. Well, it was done. He might as well ask his question. Glorfindel, however, had anticipated it.
"You want to know how you survived when you had no Naneth to suckle you."
"Yes, Lord Glorfindel."
"If for any reason an elfling cannot take milk from his Naneth, another elf-matron who has milk will stand in for her. Undoubtedly you were entrusted to the care of a wet-nurse, as such an elf-matron is called."
That would have been his Edwen Nana, Anomen realized.
"Thank you, Lord Glorfindel."
"I still have a question," Elrohir declared.
"Yes, Elrohir?"
"You have explained why an elleth would have nubs, ah, 'nipples', but we are not going to suckle infants. Why then do we have them?"
"The male and female forms are mirror images. Every part on the male has its corresponding part on the female."
"But Lord Glorfindel," objected Elrohir, "an elleth does not have an ecthel."
"I said 'corresponding part', Elrohir. I did not say identical part. The elleth does indeed have her own version of the ecthel, which she takes as much pleasure in as you do yours."
Elrohir blushed. Glorfindel's answer was hitting rather too near the mark, so to speak.
"It doesn't seem fair, though," said Elladan thoughtfully, "that an elleth's nipples will turn out to be so useful when ours will not."
"Tell me, Elladan, is a song useful?"
"Not in the same way as a sword is."
"Yet we value the song nonetheless. Why?'
"Because it gives us pleasure," Elladan answered promptly.
"Indeed. So value your nipples. I am sure that when the time comes you will enjoy them quite as much as any song! And speaking of time, this conversation has been fascinating and I hope enlightening, but we do need to devote at least part of the afternoon to training with traditional weapons, wouldn't you agree. You have," Glorfindel added teasingly, "had an opportunity to catch your breath, have you not?"
"Yes, Lord Glorfindel," chorused the elflings obediently throwing themselves into their training with a will. Watching them, Glorfindel grinned with delight.
"Oh, 'Erector', you haven't seen the end of it yet," he said to himself. "No, indeed, you have not!"
After all, the balrog-slayer mused, the elflings had overlooked one very important question. They now knew how infants were nourished—but it had not occurred to them to ask where babies came from in the first place.
"As that is assuredly a matter for Natural History, I shall have to do something about encouraging their interest in the subject," chortled Glorfindel, "for I should dearly like to hear how 'Erector' reacts when that topic come up!"
Had 'Erector' seen the gleam in the balrog-slayer's eyes, he would have certainly gone to Elrond and begged for an assignment to an Orc-hunting troop. However, Reader, he did not, and so I leave you to imagine the sequel. Stay well, my friends.