Summary: BtVS/Stargate crossover
Warnings: None (except maybe for mediocre writing)
R rated
Timeline: coupla years after the series finale for Buffy and during season 8 for Stargate but it's not really that relevant
Distribution: Twisting The Hellmouth, FFnet and anywhere else you damn well please. What can I say? I'm easy.
Author: methaya
This denotes thoughts
No Schwarzenegger, That's For Sure
Jack knew that he was probably annoying the person manning the desk to no end by lagging behind when everybody else had decided not to take advantage of the late opening hours of the gym on this particular Friday night.
And how pathetic was that.
He spent his Friday nights in the gym instead of tearing up the dance floor with one or two chicks in tow. Or do the well tried dinner and a movie move with that nice new neighbor right across the street. The one that had smiled in no uncertain terms at him when he had met her picking up his mail last Wednesday.
He bent down to tie the shoe lace on his sneaker and standing up, grabbed his battered leather sports bag and swung it over his shoulder.
While passing by the leg and arm machines he looked at himself in the floor to ceiling mirrors unobtrusively.
Not too bad for a washed up ex-Special-Ops-soldier of well over forty.
Although Daniel would probably say he was going on fifteen tops most of the time.
He nodded to the blonde woman behind the juice bar which also doubled as the reception desk and braced himself for the frigid air outside.
It was about oh'three hundred and a light snow was covering Colorado Springs. Travelling through the Stargate made for whacky hours sometimes so Jack was grateful he had found a gym that was open nearly 24/7 to accommodate his equally whacky schedule.
He strode across the deserted parking lot towards his truck, searching for his keys, promptly dropping them while juggling the sports bag and his water bottle.
Jack bent down to retrieve them and afterwards, much later afterwards felt lucky that he did because that way the baseball bat aiming for his head only smashed the window on the driver's side.
Jack dropped the bag and while crouching swung around trying to swipe the legs out from under his attacker.
The young punk complete with bleached hair, base cap and a bandana tied over his nose and mouth to disguise himself went down with a grunt.
O'Neill lounged after him, rolled him onto his belly, holding both his hands in a policeman's grip, with his knee at the small of his back keeping him immobile.
That left his other hand free to search in his pockets for the cell phone to call the police.
He never saw the second guy coming, just felt air rushing past and then pain and blackness swallowed him whole.
„Yo! Fashion victim number two! Eyes up here!"
Jack opened his eyes for about a nanosecond and saw a woman running toward him and his mugger.
I hope she called the cops.
Then he was gone again.
„Are you ok? Of course you're not. You are bleeding and unconscious."
„Am not." He managed to mumble through sheer blind stubborness.
A blonde was leaning over him and looked at him anxiously.
„He talks! You're not dead! Good! I'll call an ambulance right away. Will you be ok here for a moment alone?"
„Cell..." He tried to reach into his pocket for the cell phone. Majorly bad idea. Pain and blackness enveloped him again.
The light show going on overhead was boring to say the least. Just light and dark again and again.
Someone was fondling Jack's neck and he felt a mattress under him and a slight moving sensation.
This is nice.
He became aware of a buzzing in the background. Only then did he notice that his eyes were still closed. Through supreme effort he managed to open them for a moment. Pain made him close them right away again.
No, it's not.
„... get these off of you and we'll be able to check you in under something else than John Doe. Sounds so tacky if you ask me."
Jack was able to at least understand the last part of the statement and sure enough the fondling stopped and he could feel someone trying to pry the chains of his dog tags apart.
Good luck with that. Those are meant to stay on.
„Here we go: O'Neill, with two l's, Jonathan, social security... Well, I'll just take this to the reception and see whether this gets us service around here."
Jack was painfully awake now and able to open his eyes fully at least. He was obviously in the emergency room of a hospital. If the noises hadn't told him, the antiseptic smell sure would have. Just now a young male doctor leaned over him and grabbed his penlight.
This part I know.
After about an hour of prodding and probing by the doctor and harassing by Jack, everyone around was quite annoyed with everyone but particularly with O'Neill so the long suffering doctor finally let Jack have his jacket. He wanted to call Daniel or Carter so they might get him out of this hell hole that is public health services.
None of his pockets yielded the cell.
For a moment Jack was ready to really get an a roll about the security of this place if a patient had to be afraid to let his stuff lying around while being treated, when one of the nurses pulled aside the curtain, a young blonde at her side.
„I guess this must be him then."
„Guess it must at that." The blonde smiled at him a bit.
„Mr O'Neill, this is the woman who called the ambulance and had you brought here." The nurse beamed proudly at the blonde. Jack couldn't care less.
„Do you have my cell phone anywhere?" He just asked brusquely, having no patience left. „I need to make a phone call."
The nurse looked affronted, the blonde just looked resigned.
"Can I give him back and get another, less cranky one?" The woman nonetheless rummaged around in her pocket and handed Jack his cell phone.
Jack grabbed it and hit the speed dial for Daniel.
While he waited for the call to go through, he looked over to where the woman was standing. She seemed familiar somehow.
„Don't I know you?"
Which was just the moment when Daniel finally picked up the phone, so both the woman and Daniel got to say more or less in unison: „That's a truly cheap pick up line you have there." while Daniel added a „Jack" and a huge yawn at the end.
After Jack had set Daniel in motion, he turned back to the blonde, feeling slightly mellowed since the end of his stay in the clutches of public health services was in sight. He knew that he had been rude before and was even slightly sorry.
„Seriously, don't I know you from somewhere?" He inquired.
„I only work the evening shift at your gym for practically ever." She smiled showing a lot of white teeth. "You are always the last one to leave."
Hmm, I think she's trying to tell me something.
„Sorry?" He tried the puppy dog expression Daniel always worked on Fraiser but only managed to make himself feel ridiculous so he made an effort:
„Look, I'm really sorry. Sorry for being kinda gruff just now. It's just that I HATE doctors and hospitals."
The blonde apparently could relate and seemed inclined to forgive.
„Well, actually I only started working at the gym about ten days ago." She held out her hand. „ I'm Buffy Summers."
„Jack O'Neill." He shook her hand. She had a nice firm grip and pretty eyes too.
Jack couldn't for the life of him think of anything else to say.
„So... I guess I'll be seeing you around at the gym then."
Apparently she wasn't much of a conversationalist herself.
She smiled at him and he couldn't help but smile back. She looked as if she was waiting for something for a moment longer but then she turned and walked away.
„And you didn't even offer to give her a ride home when she apparently rode to the hospital in the ambulance with you?"
Hearing it like that from Daniel made Jack feel even worse.
„Daniel, just shut up. Will ya? I get it. I'm a moron, I know."
Jack rubbed at his temples trying to ease the pounding and make the meds work faster.
"Gawd! Even my hair hurts. We had better drugs back in the seventies." Jack groaned for emphasis and put his head on the head rest.
„I know, I was there, remember?" Daniel smirked, Jack hadn't even known that he could.
"Daniel. Shut. Up."
Daniel dutifully shut up.
tbc