Kingdom Hearts AU One-shot
One Drunken Night...
"So now that we held up our end of the deal, you better get us the good stuff." Xion smiles oh so sweetly at Roxas. He starts to sweat-drop when Namine gets up from the couch and sits next to her.
"Whatever do you mean Xion?" She asks her. Xion looks over her head and sees that Roxas is motioning for her to not say a word.
"A certain spiky haired blondie boy promised to get me alcohol if I helped him with a certain love situation." Xion wiggles her eyebrows at Namine. Roxas slaps his hand on his forehead. Xion is ruining everything. She sure loves to stir up trouble. Why did he even invite her to his room again?
"Oh really. My Roxas promised you alcohol if you helped him with Valentine's Day?" Namine asks calmly. Roxas can already see her bubbling with anger. Oh shit. If there was one thing Namine couldn't stand, it was watching her friends get drunk and doing stupid shit. He was so busted now.
"Well, it's mostly for Riku. I want to see him get shit-faced since he never gets shit-faced with me. He's always a perfect gentleman and I just want to see him let loose for once." Xion explains innocently. Namine nods her head as Xion continues her story. Roxas can already start digging his grave. He starts freaking out in the corner when it suddenly gets quiet.
"Well why didn't you say so earlier? I could have gotten Uncle Ansem to get us alcohol. He went back to Montana to recover for a bit. I guess we will have to call up Axel. Roxas dear, tell Axel to bring us a bottle of Absolut, a bottle of Jack and a bottle of Parrot Bay. Oh and tell him to bring a couple cases of beer. Whatever he likes. We are going to party tonight!" Namine starts texting on her phone and Roxas looks at her in shock. What the hell is going on? Namine...wants to party? Was he really in heaven?
"What are you doing just standing there? You heard your woman!" Xion snaps him out of his stupor. He looks to the two girls before he grabs his phone and makes the call. Best not to argue. Last time he did that, he ended up getting cock blocked by Axel for a week. It was not a fun time.
"Yo. What's up?" Axel answers. Roxas puts him on speakerphone for some odd reason.
"Ok. You aren't going to believe me but Namine and Xion want to party tonight. Party at my place since my folks are gone." Roxas tells him.
"Wow. Your woman is finally relaxing! That means you are going to get laid tonight!" Axel laughs through the phone.
"Shut up you moron. You're on fucking speakerphone. Anyways, just get me a bottle of Absolut, a bottle of Jack, a bottle of Parrot Bay and all the beer you want."
"Alright then, but you do know it's going to cost you, right?" Axel warns him.
"Of course he knows, that's why he's paying for all of it." Namine answers for Roxas. Axel starts laughing and Roxas yanks the phone away from her.
"Excellent. I'll be there in thirty minutes. I'm definitely bringing the gang here so you better be ready you little punk. Can't wait to see your lady drunk." Axel continues to laugh.
"Don't forget! The mission is to get my man drunk! Not to get Namine wasted!" Xion yells across the room.
"Ah, so that's why we were partying. I was starting to wonder whether you had forgotten the deal. Cool then. We have to get Riku shit-faced before Namine gets drunk. Awesome! See you then." He hangs up and Roxas curses at his phone, much to Xion's and Namine's pleasure.
"Alright! Now that the alcohol issue is settled, let's get the chips and music ready downstairs." Xion and Namine run down the stairs when the doorbell rings.
"Already?" Roxas yells as he grabs his iPod from his desk. Namine opens the door and sees Kairi and Sora bringing bags of food inside.
"I'm so glad I got that text. Good thing we didn't go to your aunt's stupid party." Sora drops the food on the counter before running up the stairs to greet Roxas.
"Be careful with that Sora!" Kairi snaps at him.
"Calm down babe. It's just potato chips. Jeez." He groans from upstairs. Kairi shakes her head as she greets Namine and Xion.
"So, we are trying to get Riku shit-faced right?" Kairi smiles evilly at the girls. They both nod their heads when Kairi pulls out a little book from her pocket.
"What's that all about?" Xion asks her.
"121 ways to get your boyfriend drunk by midnight!" Kairi exclaims. The girls laugh in triumph as they start to come up with an evil plan.
"What's this all about?" Riku growls as Xion pulls him inside. Namine and Kairi look at each other nervously as Xion starts giggling like crazy. She always does that when she's nervous about something. The party had just gotten started since Axel brought the alcohol. Roxas was pissed when he handed Axel his crisp $100 bill. Of course, a kiss from Namine made everything better.
"Roxas promised me alcohol since I helped him with his Valentine's Day present for Namine. You remember right?" Xion sweet talks him in the kitchen.
"I guess but we can't stay too long. You have to go home and I actually want to sleep for once." Riku growls.
"Yes. Of course. I just want to drink for a bit. That's all." She smiles at him. Kairi and Namine nod their heads as they begin phase one of their plan.
"Anything you want to drink?" Namine asks him.
"Just a coke. I don't want to drink tonight." Riku tells her. Kairi gets an evil glint as she grabs a plastic red cup. She starts pouring the coke when she slips in a shot of Parrot Bay in there. Best way to start off the night with some rum and coke.
"This tastes funny." Riku growls as he starts sipping the coke. Kairi winks at Xion and she grabs the cup from his hand.
"Oh come on Riku. Stop being such a baby." She starts drinking as well and hands the cup back to him as she heads off to the living room. Everybody knows that Xion hates rum but Namine was even surprised that Xion didn't puke or anything. Riku shrugs his shoulders as he continues to sip on the coke.
"Alright!" Kairi and Namine do a silent victory dance in the kitchen when the door bell rings.
"Now the real party begins." Sora smirks as he lets in Terra, Aqua, Ven, Demyx, Larxene, Lexaeus, Pence, Olette and Hayner. They all greet Sora and as he closes the door, Axel drops the beat.
"Let's get this party started!" He roars as he turns Roxas' iPod to maximum volume. Everybody screams as they grab alcohol and snacks. Soon enough, everybody starts dancing in the middle of the living room.
"I'm suddenly really thirsty. Can you get me another coke Xion?" Riku shouts in the middle of the party. Xion looks at him strangely for a second but then recovers as she heads back to the kitchen. There she finds Namine and Axel chatting up about life in general.
"Help me! Riku wants another coke!" Xion whines.
"What? The plan isn't working?" Axel coos at her. She takes a swing at him but Namine stops her.
"Here, bring him another rum and coke. We are trying to get him shit-faced so him wanting coke works in our favor. As long as he doesn't taste the alcohol, he should be good." Namine hands the cup to her and Xion walks back to the living room. Five minutes later, she returns with the empty cup.
"He wants another one! He says they are really good!" Xion starts freaking out. Namine sighs and Axel starts laughing when Kairi and Sora walk in. They had both taken a couple of shots and just gotten done dancing.
"What's...wrong?" Kairi slurs as she leans against Sora. Namine knows that Kairi is still a light-weight. She had just gotten into the drinking scene, but luckily, Sora was an expert.
"Riku wants another coke." Xion starts getting nervous.
"No need to be nervous. This is working out perfectly. Once he gets several more of these cokes, he will be good and start taking shots with me. It will be perfect." Namine reassures her as she pours more alcohol into the coke.
"Ok then. I just don't want him to catch me giving him spiked drinks. Then he will stop drinking altogether." She whines.
"Don't worry and just give him the damn coke!" Axel snaps at her. She sticks her tongue out at him as she returns back to the living room. Roxas comes in as she leaves and finishes his can of beer.
"So, is it working! Is he drunk yet?" Roxas asks Namine.
"Nope. She barely brought him his third cup. Don't worry. After the sixth cup, he will be ready for the taking." She smiles at him.
"I want shots! Sora-poo! Get me shots!" Kairi randomly yells out. Sora looks at her nervously and Namine brings out the Jack.
"Let's start drinking then Kairi!" Namine smiles at everybody. They all start playing Kings when Terra and Aqua come into the kitchen.
"What are you guys playing?" Terra asks as he sets his beer down.
"Kings. Want to join?" Roxas asks him.
"Of course! I love kings!" Aqua squeals as she pushes Roxas aside. Namine giggles and Terra makes room for Roxas as they continue the round. Soon enough, Kairi was already drunk. Everybody else seemed to be fine, even Namine wasn't buzzed.
"Hey! Your woman isn't even drunk! I thought she was a light weight!" Axel whispers in Roxas' ear.
"I don't know man. I haven't been able to hang out with her in a while. She's been busy with school work and I have my remedial classes after school." Roxas explains to him.
"Oh man. I guess you aren't getting laid tonight." Axel laughs at him. Roxas glares at him and Terra pats him on the back.
"Don't worry. You don't need alcohol to turn on your woman. I would know. If you ever need advice, come to me." Terra offers his assistance. Roxas looks at him strangely and Terra looks to Aqua. She looks up and Terra gives her a wink. She giggles in embarrassment and Namine starts talking to her.
"You have to have a certain charm with the ladies. It's in the rules man." Terra tells him.
"Yeah. You have to be suave, cool and calm. Like me!" Axel strikes a pose and Sora hits him on the head.
"It's your turn dumb ass!" He yells. Everybody starts laughing and Axel sticks his tongue out at him as he pulls another card from the pile. Xion popped up about six more times to refill the coke. Around the seventh time, she comes back, but with Riku right behind her.
"Those cokes were making me real thirsty. Any way to get rid of this thirst?" He asks the group.
"A shot of Jack will do the trick!" Namine speaks up. Riku groans as he takes a seat on the stool.
"Something that isn't alcoholic." He growls.
"Oh come on man! Namine, who doesn't drink, is inviting you to take a shot! Don't deny her man! I don't know what she will do to you in your sleep if you refuse!" Axel warns him. Riku looks up at Namine and sees her smiling innocently at him. He suddenly shivers in fear. He does know what she is capable of. The one time he made Xion cry, she managed to hot wire his car and managed to park it inside a classroom. That is something he will never forget. Riku shakes his head as he takes the shot glass from Roxas and downs the Jack.
"Just one! No more!" He growls. Everybody cheers and soon enough, everybody starts taking shots with Jack and Absolut.
"This is aweesssooommmeee!" Kairi squeals as she leans against Sora. Aqua and Terra laugh as Axel starts imitating Riku. Roxas looks at Namine and sees that she is still completely normal. How was that possible? Last time they partied, she got drunk after two shots. Now she taking shot after shot with everybody and not swaying around. What was going on? As he drinks his beer, he notices Riku starting to sway a little. Xion was too entertained with watching Axel and Namine duel to the death that she didn't even notice Riku acting strangely.
"You ok dude?" Sora thumps him hard on the back. Riku stumbles a little but then he recovers just as quickly as if he had never tripped.
"Nope. Nope. Everything is alright. Thank you for your concern Sora." Riku pats Sora on the shoulder. That made everybody stop their activities for a few seconds. Xion rises slowly from her chair as she creeps towards Riku.
"Babe? Everything ok?" She asks nervously.
"Of course my dear Xion. Everything is perfectly normal. Get back to your conversation with Kairi. If you need me, I will be in the living room." He grabs a cup of coke spiked with rum and heads out of the kitchen. Everybody stares at him as he rounds the corner. Once he disappears, Axel bursts into laughter.
"Riku is a 'gentleman' when he's drunk? What the hell? Is this madness?" He doubles over in laughter and Namine starts giggling in the corner. Xion tries to stifle her laughter but to no avail. Soon enough, Hayner and Olette come into the kitchen with shocked expressions on their faces.
"What's wrong?" Roxas asks them.
"Uhhh...I don't know if this is normal ….but..." Hayner tries to explain but Olette cuts him off.
"Pence is talking with Riku and it seems that Riku is interested in traveling to France and Italy in the near future. His perfect behavior is freaking me out!" She cuddles up next to Hayner and Axel smacks his own forehead.
"What the hell? Riku is being a weird drunk! That can't be normal." He starts complaining.
"Calm down Axel. This is what alcohol does to people. It makes them act strange, stupid, or both. In this case, it's making Riku acting strange. Now we have to make him act stupid!" Namine smirks as she hands Xion the bottle of vodka.
"You know what to do. You want to get your man shit-faced. It's time to get him shit-faced." Namine encourages her. Xion smiles at her with an evil glint in her eye as she scampers out of the living room. The gang starts laughing once more as they get back to their game at Kings. Five minutes hadn't even passed when they hear whooping from the living room. Pence comes running in the kitchen out of breath.
"Riku just took three shots with Xion and now he's trying to get naked!" He chokes out. Namine and Axel rush to the scene with Roxas right behind them. As they walk into the living room. They see Xion's mouth hang open as Riku is changing the music to Roxas' iPod.
"I'm ready to start the party! Who wants to join me." Riku stands up and he's completely shirtless. Namine widens her eyes for a second before Roxas pulls her behind him.
"Don't even think about it! Or him! Just don't think at all!" He growls. Namine recovers as she realizes her boyfriend's illogical jealously. She only sighs as the the music starts. Riku jumps on the coffee table and starts girating to the music. Xion starts squealing and soon enough everybody comes in to watch the show.
"Wow, perfect gentleman and now male gigolo! What else could happen?" Axel laughs as he watches Riku trying to take his pants off. After Sora and Roxas pull Riku down and tell him that he can't take his pants off, Riku just jumps back on the coffee table and continues to dance. Kairi and Aqua start throwing dollar bills at him, making Terra and Sora insanely jealous.
"You never do that to me!" Terra growls in Aqua's ear.
"You're my boyfriend. That's another story. This is Riku we are talking about! When we tell him what happened, he will be freaking out like no other." She continues to throw the bills as Axel starts recording all this on his phone.
"Be sure to catch my good side." Riku grins at the camera as he continues to dance. Namine and Aqua would keep handing him spiked cokes to keep his energy up. Even Olette starts pulling out her money and throwing dollar bills. When the playlist stops, Riku stands still for a minute before he grins in triumph and falls to the floor face first.
"OH MY GOD! THAT WAS HOTT!" Xion cries out before she passes out on the couch. One by one they all fell until Namine and Roxas were the last ones standing. They both manage to curl up the couch after they pushed Axel off when Roxas whispers in her ear.
"How are you still standing? You had so much to drink."
"If you really want to know, you will have to make it worth my while." She whispers back. Roxas raises his eyebrow and she starts to giggle when she rises from the couch.
"If you can manage to get me naked before we reach the stairs, I might let you know." She teases him. Roxas takes the hint as he scoops her up in his arms, despite his drunken state.
"This is one challenge I don't plan to lose." He growls as he starts to make out with her.
The Next Morning...
"FUCK!" Riku suddenly wakes up as he grabs his head. He looks around and sees Xion curled up next to him. She mumbles something incoherent but Riku is pretty sure that he heard the word Parrot Bay come out her mouth. He sees strewn beer cans and plastic red cups. Roxas and Namine were nowhere in sight. Kairi was with Sora in the corner. He was shirtless apparently. Axel was sleeping on the coffee table. Aqua and Terra took the couch across the TV. Pence and Olette were asleep at Hayner's feet as he was sleeping in a sitting position against the wall.
"What the fuck happened?" He growls as he tries to get up without waking up Xion when he realizes that he is stark naked.
"WHAT THE FUCK!" The whole house shakes as everybody feels Riku's wrath.
Note to Xion: Never get your boyfriend fucked up unless you plan to bring him an extra change of clothing.
It has been so long since I have updated so I decided to put a sequel up for my valentine's day story. I think someone had requested this so whoever you are my dear reader, this is for you! Don't worry about my Soul Eater story. It is slowly but steadily going. I will see that story end, one way or another. As always, comments are appreciated. Enjoy it my loves.
~magnoliastar08