A/N: heyy! This is my first Wicked fanfic. Please be nice! I love Bessa. Please feel free to review, alert, favorite, what not. So…yeah. ENJOY! I do not own 'Wicked'.
Nessarose POV
Disappointed.
Embarrassed.
Backfired.
The three words that would describe me the most. I try, and try so hard to keep up this 'cheery, happy' façade for Boq. My beloved munchkin. Now that I am the governor now, I've realized that it's becoming harder, and harder to keep it up. I keep failing, and I keep hurting. But that's not me, and this wasn't how it was suppose to end, oh no.
Staring outside my bedroom window, I look down from the dusks' moon. I just roll myself away from all of the horror. Sometimes, I wish I could just die. Right here, and right now. Why not? Everyone would be so much happier with 'The Wicked Witch of the East' gone for good. The munchkins would have their rights back, Boq would be free from my clutches, and I wouldn't be such a burden to my sister, Elphaba. Life would just be normal, no, better than normal; perfect.
My thought were interrupted when Boq knocked on the door.
"Madame, you seem awfully quiet in here. Is anything wrong, Madame?" Gee, apparently I'm not the only one keeping up a façade!
"Yes, Boq. I'm fine. And it's Nessarose, not Madame." by now, I think I know that he only calls me, "Madame" just to annoy me to death. Hopefully I will just be annoyed to my time right now, because death is more peaceful and easier than life. I don't even care if I am stuffed in the deepest darkest pits of Hell. But seriously, how stupid does he think I am?
I heard footsteps walk away from the door. I could just imagine him right now. Eyes rolling, hands in pockets, head down, and curses placed upon me. I hope he's happy now!
Then, my brain just hatched up an idea. I don't really care if it doesn't come true. I rolled myself back to the window, and looked up at the sky. Searching for the first star of the night. Searching, searching, yes! I stared intently up at the sparkle of light above me.
"Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight." then, I closed my eyes, and quickly said the wish aloud.
"I wish for my unforgettable, celebrative death as soon as possible." I quickly fluttered my eyes looking for any other stars. Nope, no others. Now, the last thing to the spell. Believe. Believe like there's no tomorrow. Make this wish everything I've dreamed of.
I smiled at the thought of dying, leaving Oz forever for the better, or not so better life. I rolled myself to my bed. Then, a wave of dizziness crashed into me immediately after I turned around. 'Yes!' I muttered under my breath. I closed my eyes tightly making the invisible roller coaster in my mind go much, much faster. Sure, it was nauseating, sure it was sickening, but it would all be over soon, and for a good reason: to make everyone else happier.
I rolled myself faster to my bed, climbed onto it, lay down and turned out my lights. This would be my last night for good. With the twists and turns becoming stronger, I squeezed my eyes shut, and that was the end of that.
The Next Morning. . .
I peeled my eyes open, noticing that my body was placed in an uncomfortable ball. I'm still believing that I will die by the end of today. Yes, it's all about believing! Dragging myself into my chair, there was a sharp pain that overwhelmed me. I groaned in pain, but it would all be worth it in the end. That's what I keep telling myself.
I pushed myself to the mirror. And was slightly shocked at my reflection. My face was pale, my eyes were bloodshot to the iris, my hair had lost it's shine, my lips completely lost their color. I'm surprised that I hadn't turned into a zombie yet!
I quickly put my hair up into a bun, and rolled my way downstairs to the grand dining room where my Boq will serve me.
I passed Boq who was in the library sitting in one of the chairs, deep in thought. Maybe he's thinking about how to escape me. No worries, because after today, I'm gone for good!
Suddenly, another nausea spell passed through me, and I closed my eyes, and did the best to keep going onto the dining room. I had one hand over my eyes--the twists were getting too strong for me, until I felt like being dropped down, and I fell out of my chair.
A/N: How's that for a first chapter?! And, yes, I had to put in a cliffy. It just brings in more readers. I'll have the second chapter up in maybe tomorrow, or Monday. Review, because they make me happy.