Noel was three years old when his grandmother took him to meet his new sibling. He remembered her shouting over the phone the day before that, voice stern in a way that made him hide behind doorways for the day whenever she appeared, afraid that the monster in guise of his grandmother's skin was going to eat him if he wasn't careful. He remembered her sighing over his actions, tucking him in bed the night before with a gentle kiss on the forehead as she explained to him that he was about to get a new little sister, and that there is no monster, cariño, it is all in your head.
He hadn't understood, since his grandmother told him before that his parents were long dead. Still, he had been excited then, unable to sleep for a good portion of the night in anticipation of a new sibling. It would have been better to get a brother than a sister, but anyone would do, really.
He remembered sitting comfortably in the cradle of his grandmother's arms the day he met Yeul as she spoke to doctors and he clung with chubby hands to the stuffed rabbit that used to be his, but he was going to give to his new little sister. Sharing was important, or at least that was what Grover said on Sesame Street.
The first time Noel Kreiss met Paddra Nsu-Yeul, he wasn't sure what to think. She was so much smaller than he expected! Pink and wrinkly and swaddled in a white blanket with blue and red stripes at the edge. He remembered twisting from where he had been sitting patiently in his grandmother's arms, and pressing both hands and face against the glass window, stuffed rabbit dangling from his fingers and eyes wide as he took in every detail he could.
"You're going to be a big brother now." His grandmother told him. "And I'll need you to look after her, lo comprende?"
"Si, abuela." Noel responded absently, utterly enchanted with the little life just across the glass from him.
.
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The first time Yeul went to a wedding, she was three years old. Her grandmother (but not her real one) dressed her up in a pink dress with sequins one top and layers upon layers of frills on the bottom and then braided her (unusually colored) hair into two parts. She wore new shoes, shiny and black with a strap on top, and made sure to hold Noel's hand the entire time so that she wouldn't get lost.
She barely paid any attention to the ceremony, instead constantly on the look-out for sugary, sticky treats that would be handed out to the children.
"What's wrong?" Noel asked her once, looking concerned and his hair already starting to fall out of the slick gelled style that he had to wear to go with his suit. "Yeul, you haven't smiled at all today. Weddings are happy."
She thought about it. The music was loud and starting to irritate her, but that wasn't it. The food wasn't what she was used to, but that wasn't it. She pulled her fingers from her mouth, skin still sticky from where she had been sucking on it to get the last lingering taste of polvorónes, and pointed to the lady laughing far away from them, wearing the white dress even poofier than her own.
"She's making a mistake." She told him in all seriousness. "I don't like seeing it."
"You mustn't say that, niña." Came their grandmother's sharp reprimand from only steps away. Yeul looked back to meet her grandmother's strict (and a little unsettled) eyes. "Weddings are when people put their mistakes behind them."
Yeul only stuck her fingers back into her mouth, unwilling to say that she already knew all the new mistakes this wedding would bring.
.
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"Your sister is really weird." Yanny told Noel in a mock whisper, making the younger boy frown.
"She's not weird." Noel insisted, not looking up from his video game. "She's cool, and you wish you had a sister as cool as her."
"She's weird, and she needs to stop." Yanny complained, the mock whisper gone as Noel continued to ignore him for the fighting game in front of him. They had already gotten into numerous fights over the subject, and Noel wasn't in a hurry to get in one more and then be grounded by his grandmother. Not to mention, Yeul never approved of those fights either, even if he was trying to defend her honor.
"You're the weird one." Noel murmured under his breath instead, jaw tightening even as he mashed angrily at his controller.
"You know what she said yesterday?" Yanny continued, not having heard the younger boy at all. "She told me it didn't matter if I keep an eye on Rigo or not, he's going to die soon anyway."
On the small television screen before them, Noel's character punched the NPC out cold, and he switched back to the character select menu, glad not for the first time that Yeul was at her dance class and Yanny only ever said things like that she was gone from the house.
"Is this why you wanted to come over today?" Noel demanded, glaring at the television screen instead of his friend. "To talk crap about her? I told you she has weird dreams sometimes, and she doesn't always know whether she dreamt it or if it's real."
"Yeah, well, she better stop dreaming about Rigo. If something happens to him, it's going to be all her fault."
"If you don't stop talking about her, I'm going to beat you up and it's going to be all your fault." Noel insisted harshly. If it weren't for the fact that he and Yanny were in the same class and walked to and from school together since they also lived in the same apartment complex…
There was a banging sound from the kitchen that made both boys tense and stop in their tracks. "Are you boys fighting again?"
"No, nana." Yanny called back pleasantly, even as Noel turned his attention back to the character selection screen, moving the cursor back and forth absentmindedly. "We're just playing a game!"
"Not anymore we're not." Noel declared, soft enough to ensure his grandmother wouldn't overhear. "If you're just going to complain about Yeul you can go away."
Right now he didn't want anything to do with Yanny, not when the other boy was someone who could threaten his five year old sister. She was just a little kid! Others might see her as creepy because of the way she stared at people and her knowing words, but Noel just thought she was — uh, precocious. They just didn't like that she was smart, that's all. Not only that, but Noel knew she was the bestest little girl in the entire world with the brightest smile and the sweetest laugh.
She was his to protect and that meant he would gladly take being grounded every other week to make sure nobody said anything bad about her.
The only good thing about Yanny was that he always came back after with an apology, even if they eventually got into fights again within a week.
"You'll see." Yanny said darkly, even as he got up from where he had previously been sitting on the carpet next to Noel. "When she turns her voodoo your way, you can come find me."
.
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"Stay." Yeul insisted, yanking at Noel's hand with both of her own and nearly unbalancing him. She was freshly nine, and Noel was twelve — awkward and lanky and as tall as their grandmother now, prone to tripping over objects that he usually maneuvered gracefully around.
She pouted at him, widening her eyes in a plea that he knew always worked to make him crumble in his decisions.
True to form, Noel looked torn, and then glanced toward their grandmother, who only shook her head with amusement.
Yeul yanked again, just as insistent as before. She knew her strengths and how to use them — she was still small, still had her braided pigtails and a baby face, and she probably looked more than a little pathetic in her white nightgown and with tendrils of hair clinging to her skin from the fever. It had broken the night before, but Yeul didn't want to go to Mass. She didn't want Noel to go, either.
"It's fine, cariño." Their grandmother relented, sounding amused and a little tired. She leaned forward to press a kiss against Noel's forehead, and then down to kiss the top of Yeul's hair. "She is still feeling ill. You stay with her, and I will give thanks to God for your well-beings."
Noel looked torn, but Yeul kept her grip steady.
"If you're sure." He finally responded, but looked rather relieved. Yeul felt a surge of triumph. She knew that he would rather stay with her than to go Mass as well, but Noel was never the type to leave their grandmother alone if he could help it. The both of them stayed at home more than they went out to play, helping their grandmother around the house with chores and whatever she needed.
Yeul felt a pang of guilt, but then smothered it quickly.
"You two be good, then." Their grandmother said, carding her fingers through the top of Yeul's hair. "Don't burn the house down. Rigo will drive me straight there and back so you won't have much time to get in trouble."
"Don't worry," Noel quipped with a grin, glancing down to Yeul. "We'll be quick about the drug dealings and black market organ sales, then."
Their grandmother swatted Noel's head and then laughed as he yelped indignantly.
She pressed another kiss down on Yeul's hair, and muttered, "Feel better, my dove."
Those were the last words Yeul ever heard from her.
.
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"Dad says he's going to make everything okay." Natarle told him. Yeul was asleep next to him with her head pillowed in his lap, their fingers interlaced together. Noel hadn't let go of her hand ever since the police showed up at their door to give their condolences. He sat outside the door when she had to use to toilet, and didn't let anyone take her from him otherwise.
"You can stay with us." Natarle continued, looking away. She was only a few years older than him, the same age as Rigo, but Noel didn't want to think about Rigo either. (The car accident was all his fault!) "We won't separate you and Yeul. We'll keep you together."
"Thank you." Noel echoed, feeling not entirely there. All he knew was that was what he was supposed to say. As much as he liked Natarle (and he did, since she was nice and Rigo's friend and often came over with baked goods for him and Yanny and eventually Yeul as well), he didn't want to be at the mercy of her or her family.
Not to mention, she was going to college soon, and that meant he would have to protect Yeul from… well, her family was nice enough, but he just didn't know them.
His grandmother was dead. Rigo was dead. Yanny hadn't spoken to him since the news, and Noel knew that the other boy blamed Yeul somehow for his cousin's death. Their home was gone.
"You can have my room." Natarle said, voice gentle. "I've moved all my stuff out already, but… I can be here as often as possible until school starts. Everything will be fine."
Except nothing would be fine. Noel nodded anyway, bringing his gaze down to Yeul.
He wondered if the accident would have happened if he had gone with his grandmother.
"Okay." He told Natarle, and she gave him several more sympathetic pats on the head and sad eyes before leaving him alone with Yeul. Her family wasn't too well off either, but her father had been good friends with his grandmother and now what little their family had was being extended to him and Yeul.
He waited and waited, feeling the warmth permeate the room as the sun slowly set outside the window until he felt Yeul's breath finally hitch slightly.
"Did you know?" He asked her, because he should already know the answer to that but needed a confirmation. Yeul had always known things she wasn't supposed to. Known when Rigo would run over a cat, when their grandmother would be home late, when Noel would need to leave for school early because there was going to be a traffic jam on the way which meant he would need to take an alternate route.
Little things. At least, that was what he thought.
She shifted in his lap, and Noel ran fingers through her hair.
"The same things always happen no matter what I do." She answered him, sounding very young.
"But you saved me." He swallowed, feeling the lump in his throat. He didn't want to think it. But he had to ask. "Why didn't you tell her to stay home? You could have done it. She would have done it." And then they wouldn't be in this situation. His fingers tightened in her hair unconsciously, but Yeul didn't move or make a sound.
"She wouldn't have." Yeul said. She shifted, drew her knees closer to her chest, and curled a hand near her face. "I already saw it happen."
.
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"So is your brother seeing anyone right now?"
"Huh?" Yeul quipped, pretending not to have heard the question as she looked up with a smile from the paperwork her history teacher just handed out as homework. "Sorry, I didn't hear that."
"Your brother." The blonde girl drew back, looking shy and twirling a strand of hair around her fingers. Yeul didn't know her name. She knew it wouldn't matter. The girl would move away before the end of the year, anyway. "He's your brother, right? Noel Kreiss? Does he have a girlfriend?"
Ever since she entered the same high school as him, Noel had finally taken up some after school activities since she could do her homework on the stands while waiting for him and he could keep an eye out on her rather than have to leave in order to pick her up from middle school. That meant he had been drafted into the football team, and his popularity suddenly skyrocketed while he remained oblivious to it all.
"I don't know." Yeul responded, her smile just as polite as ever. "He doesn't really talk to me about that stuff."
It was true. What she didn't say was that it was because Noel had never had a girlfriend before, all too busy with looking after her and his pile of part-time jobs from the moment he was old enough for them. Natarle's family were kind, but they were barely scraping by and Noel paid for everything the both of them needed himself from school supplies to clothing and snacks.
She knew that he was saving for her quinceañera and wanted to surprise her, and that he was setting aside a little bit of every paycheck for her post-secondary education. She also knew he had no intention on attending college himself, but instead was already looking for full-time work when he finally graduated.
He had yet to tell her any of this.
"Oh." The blonde girl looked disappointed. She then cleared her throat, and pressed fingers together. "Could you… could you ask him for me? I mean, about girls. What girls he likes. The type of girl. That kind of thing. Oh! And if he has a girlfriend. Or not. Not is good."
"Sure." Yeul agreed glibly with no intention of doing so. She smiled brightly (Noel liked seeing her smile, said it made everything in the world look better). "I can ask him today."
She would have to have a stern talk with him anyway, because wasting money on her fifteenth birthday was a dumb idea when he should be saving some for himself. She wondered if it was right of her to let him see her as his entire world, to keep him all to herself when there were so many people interested in him and his potential.
If Noel quit his jobs and focused on football, he would easily be scouted before the end of his secondary schooling. He could get an athletic scholarship to a post-secondary of his choosing. He had the talent, and such bright futures ahead of him. She could make do. But he wouldn't, because she was his entire world, and she —
Yeul looked away from the ecstatic blonde girl, ignoring the man reflected in her peripheral vision on the window, the same man who always watched over her, who wore such dark clothes and had such a somber expression. She was the only one who could see him, anyway. She learned that the hard way when she asked about him in pre-school.
She had a secret, and it wasn't that she could see the future. It was that she had more than one important person in her life, and Noel didn't know about it.
He was going to spend his entire life looking out for her and bettering her own. They would be so happy just in each other's company, but… he could be so much more. She wondered if she should tell him or not, whether he would be happy with just this or whether he would always wonder what else there could have been. For all that she could see the future, she couldn't see what was hidden in people's hearts.
She looked away from the board where her teacher was writing out assignments, biting her lip.
"Hey," the blonde girl asked, looking concerned. "What's wrong?"
Yeul looked up and shook her head, smiling once more. "Sorry. It's nothing. I just don't like watching people make mistakes."
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A/N: Written for the To The Moon prompts from the quote 'I don't like watching people make mistakes' which probably should have inspired a different story, but here we have it! I realised recently that I have a lot of stories saved in my DreamWidth that never make it to places like here or AO3 so I'll trying posting a few more things... DDTU will be back after I finish a current project of mine.