I'll start by saying that the story begins 2 years after Chihiro leaves the Bathhouse, and when it says '***3 years later***' it means an additional 3 years later... So a total of five years after she left the bathhouse. Hope that explains some things...
Anyway, hello. If you are here, on , (Which, I suppose you must be), you are obviously cool. If you are here in the Spirited Away section of Anime Fiction (Which, if you weren't, I would be aghast), you are a badass. Just wanted to make sure you knew where you stood in the rankings of my mind. If you are my age, and STILL here, you are an upright A+ quadrupled mega special GOD(-ESS).
'Nough said. You can go read, now th-
Oh, shoot. I'm literally just typing as I think, and totally forgot to mention-
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. I don't own the characters (besides a few OCs that will arrive more fully in the future) and I don't own the setting, either. Or the original plot line, very briefly mentioned in here. Nothing. I'm not talented enough to claim right to any of Hayao Miyazaki's gorgeous creations. Like Haku. I mean, the kid's a dragon. And I don't own him. Damn.
Okay, go on.
I found her standing there– just standing there- in the river. My river. She was up to her hips in the water, looking away. Her hair was tied back- when hadn't it been?- with the sparkling purple hair-tie that had been made especially for her so long ago. She was wearing the same clothes; holding the same, timid stance as when I had first laid eyes on her. I couldn't see her face, but of course I knew her name. I didn't think I'd ever forget it. I hoped I never would.
Chihiro.
Seeing her brought back the past in a flood...
Memories of knowing Yubaba was waiting for me to report to her, as I did every night.
Knowing I'd never have a friend in the world, knowing I was all alone.
Knowing that I wasn't who I thought I was, knowing what I didn't know– my name.
I remembered it all, clear as the river water in front of me. Of course, those were only memories now. Gone. I did find a friend. I did find my name. Yubaba was no longer a concern to me. Everything that had happened was now, finally, becoming nothing but an unpleasant memory. And I thought, that when the memory had finally left me for good, everything would be different. I thought that when Chihiro left, she would be able to get along with her life, and I with mine.
I looked up again, at the girl in the river.
The girl I knew, and didn't know.
She turned to face me–
My eyes opened slowly, as if to meet her glance. But I was only looking at the sky, fathomless gray above me.
Just a dream.
It wasn't the first time I'd had the dream since Serendipity arrived. Serendipity, Yubaba's replacement.
Yubaba's bosses, the identities of which I would never know, never wanted to find out, had not been happy with the arrival and escape of a young girl, those two years ago. And in their rage, they had banished the bird woman, and brought in... her.
She was twice as strict, three times harsher, and four times younger.
She operated just as Yubaba had, with the use of names. She was different, though. She could do things that Yubaba couldn't. She was powerful, overwhelmingly so, for a girl barely older than I was. In fact, she had been so powerful, so dominant, that I had fled in cold blood, leaving the others in my wake to weather the damage.
Like a coward.
I couldn't help it, though. I couldn't restrain my curiosity. I'd gone back.
I'd overlooked the workers, crept into the bathhouse to witness this new girl's job on the place. How could she hope to keep the position at such a young age? There was no way she would be taken seriously.
But I had been wrong.
Everyone had been working in harmony; their movements in complete unison. Every single step, scrub, and breath seemed to be one, shared motion. As I watched, I noticed that they weren't speaking either, weren't even looking at each other, or anything at all. Their eyes had gone blank, glassy, as if they were daydreaming, all of them at once.
I hadn't stayed long the first time.
But I had gone back. Again and again.
I had caught a struggling worker, once or twice; I'd tried to speak to them, tried to get them to tell me what was going on–
None of them had said a word. Each of them just stood there, staring. They hadn't even seemed to recognized me. So I'd left them there.
But when I came back the next day, they were gone. This happened every time, without fail.
Once, I tried to board the train, to leave and get a hold of Yubaba's sister. But the train was never there; at least, it hadn't been lately. I'd tried to fly there, follow the tracks... but when I did, her house was empty. It wasn't the kind of empty that said, 'not home, be back soon', it was the kind of empty that held finality. It felt like she had gone for good. I couldn't imagine why... and it frightened me. No matter how many times I returned, searched the place... nothing. The only re-occuring difference was that even more dust had settled each time I walked in.
I was as running out of options.
In hindsight, it might not have been a brilliant idea to stay in that house. I had had no other choice, being merely fourteen and having no one to go to. I suppose I was sick of mooching off of the bathhouse's food, taking it from unsuspecting guests and sleeping in one of the Spirit's food stands. Still, looking back on the decision, it wasn't a smart one.
By the time I'd realized that, it was too late. I was already too far gone.
It took a few moments, after 'waking up' to feel the movement of my limbs. My mind was in a completely different place, I was still by the river, waking up from a dream, looking across the wide river from where she had come, wondering why I had lied to her, telling her I'd see her again.
I knew though, now, after so long of this, that if I focused hard enough, I could feel the control over me. I could even, for a few blessed moments, put my mind and body in the same place- I could feel her. Sometimes, I could even look at what my eyes were seeing.
But I kept losing it. I kept forgetting. More and more of my life was slipping away from my mind, and all I could remember now was the lie, the girl, the river, and the wrong.
What I couldn't remember?
What those things had meant to me.
In my head, when I wasn't concentrating hard enough, it was like life had moved on. But it wasn't the same. I slept and I woke, I wandered, ate, worked a small shift, and used my free time to my own devices.
But as I forgot my memories, I felt each one slip away.
And sometimes it felt like I wasn't sleeping when I was, that I wasn't working when I was. Like I was–
It was like an itch.
Something'swrongsomething'swrongsomething'swrong–
It was like a drum beat.
The lie, the girl, the river.
The lie, the girl, the river.
The lie, the girl, the river.
I knew what this meant, because it wasn't the first time things had gotten like this. I knew that I was trying my hardest to hold on to these thoughts.
And I also knew why– it was because these memories were slipping away.
And just like every time it happened, just like every single time...
I started giving up the chant.
I started ignoring the itch.
Because could it really matter?
Maybe...
Maybe it was just a white lie, that I was thinking of. Maybe just an impulsive, childish cover-up...
Maybe the wrongness...
Maybe it was just one of those false anxieties.
And a river's just a river.
Maybe none of it mattered.
And maybe
Nothing
Was wrong at all.
Maybe
There
Never was
a Girl...
***3 years later***
When I got home, seeing mother and father waiting for me, it was obvious I'd irritated them.
"Chihiro," my father rumbled, "Why is there a C on this report card?"
"All you've had for the past three years have been straight As..." My mother's tone was degrading. Her face showing more disappointment than anger. My father, however, looked a bit on edge, if you asked me.
There shouldn't have been anything wrong with a C. Everyone got Cs. It was a passing grade, something to be proud of.
But apparently that didn't apply to me.
"I wasn't listening during class," I said honestly, knowing a lie would be suicide. Whenever I tried that... oh, they had always found out. "I kept falling asleep."
In fact, I was surprised I'd gotten a C at all. Guesswork wasn't a skill I usually had. Especially not in History. I could only assume I was getting more skilled with experience.
"Honey..." My mother said softly, "Why would you do that? You're in bed by 10:30 every night..."
"I bet you it's a boy," father said, grimacing. "That's what it is, isn't it?"
I sighed. "No, it's not–"
"Well then, what is it?"
I hadn't gone to bed at 10:30 every night. I had snuck out my window, and walked to the old carnival house, sitting and waiting there every other night, into the early hours of morning, hoping I could catch him when he came. If he came.
It was beginning to look like a lost cause. And having kept this up for five years, I was beginning to look desperate. And tired.
Spirits and ghosts and ancient bathhouses had taken over my life.
Because I knew they existed. It hadn't been a dream. No. No, I couldn't have been that.
"I..." I stuttered, "Nightmares." It wasn't a lie.
"Nightmares?" My mother asked.
"Nightmares," I said again, frowning. "They keep waking me up, and I can't fall back asleep. No matter how hard I try to forget about it, it just keeps coming back–"
"Oh, baby..." My mother had immediately switched to sympathy. My father was still eyeing me suspiciously.
I sighed. "History is my last block, and it's hardest to stay awake..."
"Well," my father sighed, rubbing his forehead. "You are not five years old anymore, Chihiro, and I expect better from you next term."
I nodded. What should I have said? 'I'm waiting for a River Spirit to come take me back to a Mystical Bathhouse filled with flying bird women and grunting green heads?' No.
Maybe it... Maybe it was all a dream.
Or maybe... Maybe the river spirit just wasn't interested in me anymore.
Maybe he'd already forgotten me.
"I, I um..."
If he had forgotten me, then I was going to make sure he knew that I hadn't forgotten him.
"I want to do my homework out by the carnival house down the hill."
"Why there, dear?" Mom asked, lifting a hand to smooth down a stray strand of my hair.
"Because it's nice outside, and I wanted to take another look around that old place–"
Eventually, I had won the dispute. My father had brought up my grade again and again at first, insisting I ought to study instead of 'mess around'. I countered this with the fact that it was Friday, and therefore there was no immediate need to work on anything. Mom had taken my side, after a few good excuses, and it was just downhill for dad from there. He'd finally conceded to my request, as long as I brought something productive with me.
When I arrived at the river, I was unsurprised to find it just as dried out as it had been the last time I was here.
My math book was sitting, unopened, on the head of the two faced stone guarding the great old building, which now stood, paint still old and chipped, quite a ways behind me.
I remembered the day I'd left this place, and he'd told me not to look back. Told me he'd see me again.
Sometimes I still wondered what would have happened if I had looked back. Sometimes I wondered if not looking back meant not doing what I was doing now.
I didn't know why I was even thinking about it. it was obviously too late, now.
Holding my breath, as if I were crossing the bridge over the train-tracks and into the bathhouse, I stepped over the dry stones of the river bed and into the world of the spirits.
Oh, he was going to see me again. I didn't care if he didn't want to come for me. I'd come for him, if I had to.
Yes. First Spirited Away Fanfic. Short chapter, I know, and some of the vague crap'll get clearer later, I promise, and I'll do as much as I can to update at a rather steady pace. Maybe once a week? I'll try that.
Anyway, it'd be nice if you told me what you thought so far. Oh, and that reminds me, if you see any obvious typos or screw ups in setting or crap like that... please let me know. If you're, you know, interested enough to. I don't know... I kind of feel like if I say 'REVIEW!' like all of the other people out there, that I'll be ignored. So I'm just gonna ramble... and probably be ignored anyway... but oh, well. I'm gonna act all ignorant, and pretend as if you're actually reading this meaningless clutter of thick black letters. This would entail me thanking you, wouldn't it? Yeah, I'll go with that.
Thanks,
Susu.