A Look At Kurt

by Samwelshdragon

Just a little drabble i wrote, thinking of some of the looks on Kurt's face during never been kissed that kind of hit me and my thoughts on what he could have been thinking. Poor kurt

Kurt watched across the choir room as Finn and Rachel fell over each other laughing and dancing together. He had always felt jealousy when he had seen them before but it had mostly been because he had wanted to be the one to be doing that with Finn. He shook his head, not any more though. Since his kiss with Dave (the only way he could think of it without crying was to think of him as Dave and not as the evil football player who terrorised him.) he had been watch and had been eaten up with envy.

All Kurt wanted was someone he could walk down the hall with and hold hands. To do the things that Rachel and Finn took for granted. Each time Finn would wait outside a class for Rachel and hug her because he had not seen her in a whole hour, it broke a little something inside him. He was extremely proud of who he was and would freely admit since coming out to his dad and Mercedes that he felt even better but it still hurt to know he would never have that traditional high school romance. It sometimes felt like he would never have that, he would be alone forever and end up like Susan Boyle alone at 50 (though obviously he would retain his amazing fashion sense and style). Couples seemed to constantly form around him and he was always on the outside looking in. Feeling constantly alone though surrounded by people.

He glanced at his phone and a small smile appeared on his face. "COURAGE" He thought to himself. It meant so much more than having the courage to deal with jerks like Dave. It meant have the courage to know that when he was out of Lima and lighting up New York, in fashion, on the stage, on the screen that he could be himself. He would survive McKinley High and when he found the right person he would have the guy that would hold his hand out and proud and he would be loved. Maybe he though thinking of a certain Katy Perry fan, he wouldn't have to wait that long.

Mercedes glanced over at him the question, "what are you smiling?" at was as obvious in her face. He quickly hid his phone and shook his head. He would keep this to himself for a while, because although it had been him to come up with the Jesse St James ultimatum he wouldn't want to be on the end of one of those. No, he though. Far better to keep this secret and see how things developed and maybe when things got to sectionals he would have someone to introduce Mercedes to afterwards.