This is a crack fic based off a fanart picture posted by MillenniumTinnyRod on her tumblr. I don't know who drew it nor do I have the link. Please do not flame if any information is wrong, characters are OOC, and the fact that none of them are in the correct time.
I am only a fan of the original series; therefore I have limited knowledge of GX, 5D's and ZeXal.
I do not own anything.
Jaden sighed as he looked in the mirror, running a hand through his plain, brown locks. It had been the fifth time his application to join the EXTREME Hair Club was denied. Letting out an exasperated sigh, he ruffled his hair violently, only for it to fall back into its' original style.
"What does a guy have to do to get some EXTREME hair around here?" He asked himself aloud.
"What makes being in the EXTREME Hair Club such a big deal?" A spirit appeared next to him, answering his rhetorical question.
"Yubel, the EXTREME Hair Club is only THE biggest club known to mankind. Its members date all the way back to Ancient Egypt, where the club was founded."
"Jaden, the Egyptians shaved their heads and wore wigs."
A grin appeared on his face as he spoke. "Which is why the club was started. The Egyptians all had EXTREME hair styles, but decided that they weren't worth keeping if the heat and bugs were going to bother them. However, the legendary nameless Pharaoh did not find their shaved heads and plain wigs appealing; therefore he began an elite club, where only those who kept their original EXTREME hairstyles were allowed membership. Ever since then, people throughout history strived to be apart of the club. It became a definition of their masculinity to have membership in this club. Only the manliest men dare to flaunt an EXTREME hairstyle."
Yubel gave him a blank stare, processing the history lesson she had just received.
"So, it's only to prove your masculinity?"
Jaden stammered out a reply. "W-well, I've proven my masculinity many times in the past...I just want to be in the club because Yugi Muto's in it." He rubbed the back of his head, something he only did when lying.
"So, are there any women in this club?" Yubel curiously asked, looking at her own reflection in the mirror.
Jaden snorted loudly, unable to control his sudden outburst of laughter.
"Women can't have EXTREME hairstyles! That's just silly!"
Yubel folded her arms and disappeared from Jaden's side.
Jaden sighed once again as he looked into the mirror. A sudden beeping noise came from the cell phone in his pocket.
"Oh look!" He said as the screen came into his view "The EXTREME Hair Club just sent out its daily news letter."
Excited, he began to read.
"The EXTREME Hair Club is proud to announce the upcoming induction of our newest accepted applicants, most notably Yuma Tsukumo, the star of the new series, Yu-Gi-Oh! ZeXal. Earlier today, Yuma Tsukumo met with previous stars and famous EXTREME Hair Club members, Yugi Muto and Yusei Fudo, and announced that in addition to Yuma's induction, the stars will also hold a reception, where members can mingle and discuss their hair secrets, as well as ask Yugi, Yusei, and Yuma for advice in dueling. There will also be a designated time where non members hoping to apply to the club will be invited to join and display their unofficially dubbed EXTREME hairstyles."
Before he could finish the article, Jaden yelled on top of his lungs.
"DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS, YUBEL?"
"That the Yu-Gi-Oh! Series is beginning to mimic Pokèmon?" Her voice droned, not very interested in Jaden's hair issues.
"Not even close! It means if I can impress Yugi, Yusei, and Yuma, then the EXTREME Hair Club HAS to accept me."
Raising one eyebrow at the teen in front of her, Yubel spoke.
"But Jaden, they've rejected your style multiple times. Plus, with styles like theirs, it's probably going to be hard to impress them."
Jaden's eyes lit up at Yubel's words. "That's it!" He said, forming fists with his hands. "I'll combine their three EXTREME hairstyles and make one ULTIMATELY EXTREME hairstyle. They'll be so impressed; they'll even start to acknowledge me as a canon Yu-Gi-Oh! Protagonist."
Yubel rolled her eyes at the young brunette, waiting to see what sort of mess he would get himself into this time.
"This reception is almost as boring as my end of Battle City duel with Joey." Yami said to Yugi, who was currently in his spirit form, giving Yami control over their shared body. (That sounds a bit suggestive.)
"Well, you suggested the reception. So now you must suffer through it." Yugi replied to him, stretching his arms over his head.
Yami sighed as his eyes wandered around. "Yes, but I half expected it to be entertaining."
He noticed how the club members were casually chatting amongst each other, most wearing their finest suits. He, however, was wearing his normal attire, complete with the DUEL DISK SYSTEM …™ by Kaiba Corp. But unfortunately for him, it did not seem like the other members were remotely interested in dueling at the moment.
"Hey, Yugi."
Yami turned to see his third* successor approaching, D-Wheel helmet under his right arm.
"Oh, hello Yusei. I see that your hair is perfect, as usual." The King of Games commented on his black and blonde locks, unaffected by the helmet.
"Well, I wouldn't have it look a mess in front of the newly inducted members. Not to mention we're overseeing the nonmembers displaying their styles."
Yami brought a hand to his face. "I forgot about that." He made it sound as if they were about to go through a painful procedure.
"Do you think…HE is going to be here?" The former Pharaoh asked Yusei, who was currently adjusting his left glove.
"His latest application was received a few days ago. I don't think he realizes he is on the 'Instantly Reject' list."
"It would be one thing if he at least attempted to change his hair, rather than continually submitting his sickly, Kuriboh look-a-like." He closed his eyes and shook his head.
"Hey guys, who are you talking about?"
Yami opened his amethyst eyes to see the newest addition to the Yu-Gi-Oh! series.
"Oh, nothing really, Yuma, just the sorry excuse for a spin off protagonist, Jaden Yuki."
"Huh," the young duelist began, "never heard of him. Why's he so bad?"
"He's just…so annoying, is all. He's never serious, and sometimes even tries to talk like he's black just to intimidate people."
"That's not intimidating, that's just silly."
Looking over Yuma's shoulder, the King of Games noticed the big white doors across the room were opened, with a procession of what he assumed to be nonmembers with name tags on, coming through. As they lined up at the end of a stage, a man made his way up to a microphone to make an announcement.
"If I may have your attention please, we would now like to begin the nonmember's portion of tonight's events. So if Master's Yugi and Yusei, along with our newest, most notable member, Yuma, could please come to the stage, we can begin.
"Well that's us." Yusei said, making his way towards the stage, Yuma and Yami in tow.
The three sat in a corner on the edge of the stage, watching as each club wannabe tried to impress everyone with their hairstyles.
With only a handful of nonmembers remaining, Yami was confident that a certain someone wouldn't show up and spoil the evening.
Unfortunately, his confidence quickly faded when a side door of the room flew open.
"Hello, ladies and gentlemen." A cloaked figure spoke as they stalked their way towards the stage. Pushing the nonmember currently onstage out of the way and trying to balance himself, the figure picked up the microphone, and proceeded to speak into it.
"It has been a while since I have been here, standing before you all. Many times, I have submitted an application to join this elite club, by time and again, I have been rejected."
Yami's forehead met with his hand as he softly whispered to his colleagues "He's finally snapped."
"However," the figure spoke, "tonight it will all change. Feast your eyes, my soon to be fellow brothers!"
The cloak was ripped from the figure, revealing it to be an abnormal Jaden. What used to be his Kuriboh puff was now a jet black afro, with purple streaks, and blonde and magenta spikes coming out in different angles. In addition to his ridiculous hair, his face, neck and hands were stained from the hair dye.
"So, what do you guys think? Am I in?" He asked, turning his head and ripping the curtain behind him with one of his misshapen spikes. He quickly pulled out a bottle of gel, squeezing he bottle's entire contents onto the spike, and then using a can of hairspray to ensure maximum hold.
The silent room quickly erupted into laughter as Jaden stood on stage waiting for approval.
"That has got to be the most ridiculous hairstyle I have ever seen!" Yami said between chuckles, while Yuma had fallen off his chair from laughter, and Yusei trying his best not to laugh.
"S-so it's extreme enough?"
"Hell no." Yami answered. "You just look ridiculous. Like when Kaiba had green hair in season 0."
As the members continued to laugh at Jaden, his eyes began to well up with tears, before finally running off stage bawling, screaming that nobody liked him and that everyone was mean.
And as he left, not a single fuck was given.
The End.
Ok, so this took forever to write. Hope you enjoyed. :D
*third successor- it goes Yami, then Yugi, Jaden, Yusei, and now Yuma, making Yusei the third Yugioh successor to Yami.