deer di book thingy

my momy got you for me tuday. she sayes I shud rit on you to pratise my speling and tu rit wat is on my mind. dady and me playt ball and run outsid. it was raning. Momy mad cak and got me a kat. i nam her cak lik my faverit food. i was hapy.

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hi book

i showt momy wat i rit and she say you hav a nam. so hi diary. You hav a funy nam. diary. Owel. momy and dady say we go to liv in new hows wit cak. it wil be fun. i play on gras agen. cak is funy.

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hi diary

nu hows is prity. dady say i can pant my room blu. cak is hapy to.

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diary

dady bild play hows for me to play in. its pink but i stil lik it. momy mad cak for me and cak. cak got cak on her nosy. it was funy.

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hi diary

momy says she can mak big cak for my birfday. i help dady cary bokxes to rooms. they ar hevy. momy and dady play wit me outsid. it was fun.

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hay diary

momy and dady hav to werk far awa. i got a kis on bot sids my fas. grama say they be bak in 2 weks. i cri for a litil. but momy and dady say they be bak suun. i hop.

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hey diary

ar you sad. im sad. momy and dady ar not her to tuk me in bed. it rans a lot. grama say i shud rit on you. she say i fel betr if i do. i jus fel mor sad. i mis momy and dady.

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hi diary

grama and me wach tv and play gams. grama say i cant play outsid becus it raning stil. im bord. i stil mis momy and dady. i dont tel grama im sad. its owr seceret. ok.

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hi diary

my birfday is tomarow. i hop momy and dady can com. grama says she hops to. me and grama practis how to spel. no ran today. me and cak play outsid. i can see momy and dady tomarow. yay.

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momy and dady did not com today. im super sad. grama tels me its ok to cry. Wen ar momy and dady comen hom.

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no momy and dady today. im sad so no gams today. cak is sad to. sory diary.

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grama lets me play at park today. she says i spel beter. grama says i can sho momy and dady how good i spel wen they com bak. wil that mak momy and dady com bak.

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cak et gramas food today. she got mad and tel me to wach cak. so cak and me go wach tv. i ask grama if momy and dady cal. but she says no.

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i wak up and her grama cry in kichen. i ask her why she cry and she says for me to go to my room wit cak. ran is very bad today.

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Dear Journal,

My name is Fionna. I'm sixteen-years old. I live in Aaa, which is a nice enough city, and I'll be going to a high school where everyone seems to be friendly. I moved to Aaa a few days ago after living with my grandmother for eleven years in a city called Ooo. Yeah, interesting names. I know.

My therapist says I should record my thoughts and feelings in this book to better "help me", she soo gently put it. And yeah, I get where she's coming from with this. But…you know…it's kind of hard to write in a journal again after what happened. Really brings back some awful memories, if you ask me. But if Simone says this'll help…well, who am I to judge? Either way, Simone has been like a second grandma to me. She's one of the very few people that I can trust with my troubles.

Ok, here goes.

Hi, my name is Fionna. I now live in an apartment rented out by my grandma. But I'm not alone. I have my trusty sidekick, Cake, to keep me company. Even though she's a cat, she's been with me through thick and thicker. So we've had a long time to bond. I'm a little anxious about starting at a new school. But, maybe, this is the "new start" my grandma was talking about. She said I needed to get away and breathe different city air. So that's what I'm gonna do. Well…not literally start breathing in the air like some maniac. But you get what I mean.

I already practiced in the mirror how I'm gonna greet everyone when I finally get there. And I think I nailed it. But I still feel a little scared of what my classmates' reactions will be. But we'll see how that goes, right?

I have to get ready for bed now. Tomorrow's a big day, if you know what I'm saying?

I won't chicken out. I promise I'll have my emotions bottled up (even though Simone would probably berate me for it). And I won't think about "that". I have to stay strong. Tomorrow, I'll become a whole new person…one that mom and dad will be proud of.

But tonight, just for tonight, I'll let myself be little Fi. I'll cry to my hearts content, while holding Cake in my arms, and curse the rain for taking my parents away. I'll hate on every plane that flies over my apartment. I'll probably take out my old journal, my very first journal from mom, and run my hands over the felt cover, maybe even read an entry or two from the short-lived "diary" of my youth.

So it's ok to cry, right?

…To be honest, I'm not so sure anymore.