Do you ever wonder how just how much of a bad turn your life took? Yeah, Dean did that all too often. Currently he was lying on the surprisingly comfortable hotel bed, over analyzing his life.
"Papa," He looked over at the small girl sitting on the bed with him. She snuggled a small tan teddy bear close to her and looked up at him with bright blue eyes. "When can I see Daddy?" Dean sighed inwardly.
"We'll see him tonight," She crawled over to Dean and rested on his lap. She rested her head on his stomach and closed her eyes slowly.
Remember that whole thing about Dean over analyzing his life? Yeah, this was the reason why.
A few years ago, Dean met the love of his life. He was a 6'0" blonde with blue eyes that would put the sky to shame and had a personality that no one could ever match. He loved the man, they were so perfect together. So perfect, in fact, that they got engaged only after a year of dating. Soon after they found out the blonde was pregnant with their now 3 year old daughter. Everything was going so perfectly.
And then life took its turn. The blonde had recently suffered a miscarriage, his second in 6 months, and it was taking a toll on their relationship. Fed up and stressed out, Dean stormed out of the house and found comfort in the arms of his longtime friend Seth. Too much comfort, in fact. One thing led to another and when Dean returned home early the next morning, he immediately confessed to his husband. Extremely hurt and unable to forgive him, the blonde ended things.
They continued to travel separately, trading off supervision of Audrey once she turned one. It never got any easier handing the small girl off to her other father.
"Time to get up, baby girl. We have to leave soon," Dean stood off of the bed and held Audrey in his arms, bouncing her back to life.
"Can I wear your shirt?" Dean chuckled and nodded. He pulled a pair of blue leggings from her small backpack along with a smaller version his black DA shirt. After quickly helping her get dressed he brushed her long blonde hair back into a high ponytail. The man stared at the blonde hair, it resembled her other father's perfectly.
"Papa?" Dean looked up and met her blue eyes. "Are you ok?"
"I'm fine, baby," He kissed her forehead and smiled.
"Your Daddy will be upset if you eat any more sweets," Dean shook his head when Audrey begged for another donut.
"Papa, please," Dean only laughed as he put a few donut holes on her plate.
"It's the eyes, isn't it?" John spoke up from behind Dean. The taller man turned around and smiled at his friend.
"It's the eyes," Audrey stuffed a donut hole into her mouth, completely in her own world.
"Have you heard from Dolph yet?" Dean shook his head.
"He's not scheduled to be here until 3, so I still have a bit," They looked down at Audrey as she ate the last bit of her donuts.
"It's still a shame, ya know," Dean nodded.
"I should go get ready to put her down for a nap before Dolph gets her. I'll see you later," Dean lifted Audrey onto his hip and began making his way to his locker room. The smile on his face instantly disappeared when he saw Dolph walking toward them, his eyes locked on his phone screen.
"Daddy!" Audrey shouted. She wriggled out of Dean's arms and ran to her blonde father. He smiled widely and lifted her into his arms, hugging her tightly.
"I missed you, baby!" Audrey giggled. Dean caught up with the child and let out a breath of air.
"I uh, I thought you weren't supposed to be here for a few more hours?" Dolph nibbled on his bottom lip, brushing a few hairs from Audrey's face.
"I've been here for a while. I wanted you to have as much time with her before you started to get busier with everything."
Dolph was referring to the upcoming pay-per-view and all of the media events that came along with it. Because of it, Dean would only be able to have Audrey on his off days, Wednesdays and Thursdays, for the next few weeks. That was gonna be hell.
"You have some sugar from donuts on your face," Dolph chuckled and wiped Audrey's face.
"Daddy can we get ice cream later?" Dean chuckled and shook his head, holding up the number 3, signaling that the small girl had already had 3 full donuts.
"I don't think so, Audrey. Go back with Papa for a little while, baby," She pouted and wrapped her arms around Dolph's neck, nuzzling her face into his neck.
"I wanna stay with you, Daddy," Dolph looked up at his former lover and sighed.
"You're coming with me tonight, remember?" Audrey nodded. "You have to stay with Papa for now. He really wants to spend time with you."
"Okay…" She sighed.
"I was actually gonna put her down for a bit. You think we can talk?" Dolph hesitated but nodded. They both grabbed one of Audrey's hands and smiled as they made their way to Dean's private locker room. The big man pushed the door open and then closed it once they all walked inside.
"Come on, Audrey," Dean sat down on the couch and opened his arms.
"No!" She pouted.
"Audrey Hope Ambrose, go over there right now," Dolph scolded. After a moment she trudged over to Dean and climbed into his lap, resting her head on his chest.
"Close your eyes, baby girl," Dean spoke softly. She did as she was told and within ten minutes of silence and her father patting her back, Audrey was sound asleep.
"How has your week been?" Dean asked as he looked over into the blue eyes he was still in love with.
"It was pretty relaxing. I had a few events and appearances but not too much. You?" Dean smiled and looked down at Audrey.
"We spent all week together. I made sure this week was completely clear so I could spend all my time with her," He brushed his hand gently down her back.
"I'm sure she had fun."
"It's gonna be tough, you know?" Dean sighed inwardly.
"You've been waiting for this push your entire career. You can't pass it up," Dean nodded.
"I know. I just feel like I'm gonna miss so much and I don't think I can handle that," Dolph smiled lightly and then looked at Dean as he looked down at Audrey.
"That's why there's video chat, Dean. And telephone's and emails and everything else in this world. So you don't miss special moments," The bigger man looked up at Dolph, his brown curls falling out of his ponytail.
"You were always the best at that…"
"At what?" Dolph asked confused.
"Calming me down. You always knew the right things to say," Dolph chuckled and looked down.
"You got worked up a lot." Dean didn't know what to say next. He had already apologized hundreds of times for what he did that night, but no matter the number of times Dolph never fully forgave him.
It had been 3 long years since he even touched the smaller man, and seeing him in person never ever made anything any easier.
"You've got a lot on your mind right now, huh?" Dean nodded. "I have to go meet with someone, but how about after the show when I come back to get Audrey we can talk for a bit?" Dean nodded again.
"I'd like that," Dean laid Audrey down on the couch, propping her head up on a pillow. He stood when Dolph did and walked the man over to the door. Dolph turned to say something but was immediately hushed when Dean pressed their lips together in a romantic kiss.
"Dean," The blonde whispered as he pulled back from the soft lips of his ex.
"I shouldn't have-"
"It's okay… I'll be back later, okay?" Dean nodded as he looked down at the ground. When he heard the gentle click of the door he exhaled loudly and allowed a few tears to fall.
"No way… You kissed him?" Roman asked as his jaw dropped. Dean nodded in shame.
"Yeah, I did," Dean huffed out.
"How in the hell did that happen?"
"We were talking about Audrey and then about us and then it just happened," Roman ran his hand through his hair.
"Speaking of, where's the little one?" Dean motioned over his shoulder.
"With John in my locker room. She's sleeping."
"What did Dolph say?" Dean shrugged.
"He just walked out. What if I really fucked up?"
"Even if you did, you both still have to take care of Audrey. He'll be in your life forever," Dean sighed in disappointment.
"I ruined my entire life."
"You didn't."
"I did. Not even only my life, I also ruined things for Audrey. She'll never have both of her father's together because I fucked up."
"You can't think of it like that. You made a mistake. You have to move on, Dean."
"Dolph was the best thing that ever happened to me. I don't think I'll ever move on."
A soft knock on the door drew Dean out of his thoughts. He looked over at Audrey, who was combing her dolls hair, before standing and going to open the door. Dolph was standing there in one of his own t-shirts and a pair of black sweatpants.
"I didn't think you still wanted to talk after…" Dolph smiled lightly and shrugged.
"Dean, stop worrying… Can I come in?" The bigger man nodded and moved aside. Dolph walked inside and ruffled Audrey's hair before sitting down on the couch. Dean sat down across from the blonde and they both watched as Audrey continued to play with her dolls.
"Did you have fun with Papa this week, Audrey?" She nodded. Dean bit down on his lip, forcing the tears back. "Dean?"
"Yeah?" He choked back a sob, but refused to look up at the other man.
"What's going on?" Dolph scooted closer to his former lover and rested a hand on his shoulder.
"I'm really gonna miss her," He mumbled.
"Dean, it isn't forever. And you'll still get to see her," Dean shook his head.
"It's not the same. Even when I do see her I won't be able to keep her for the night. I get to hug her for 6 hours and then go have a meeting," He shrugged.
"You can't think of it like that."
"But it is like that, Dolph. God, everything would be so much easier if I just-" Dean stopped and shook his head again.
"If you just, what?" The big man remained silent for several minutes.
"If I hadn't stormed out of the house that night and did what I did," A tear fell from his eye as he looked over at Audrey. Dolph felt the breath hitch in his throat and his eyes instantly went watery.
"Don't go there."
"How can I not go there? I go there every night, D. That was the single worst night of my life," Tears poured from Dolph's eyes and rolled down his cheeks.
"We can talk about this when Audrey isn't in the room," Dolph turned to get up but stopped when Dean grabbed his arm.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up," Dolph shook his head.
"You shouldn't have. I don't want to talk about this, Dean, please," The blonde sighed and looked down.
"I'm sorry," Dean repeated.
"We'll call you before she goes to bed," Dolph stood up slowly. Dean followed and nodded.
"I love you, Dolph…" Dean mumbled, his eyes hidden behind his brown curls. Dean smiled lightly, lifting Audrey into his arms.
"Tell Papa you love him, Audrey. He's gonna miss you," She reached one arm out and smiled widely when Dean stepped into it. She nuzzled her head into her father's neck and kissed him. Dean wrapped his free arm around Dolph, not able to help himself.
"I love you, Papa."
"I love you, too, Audrey," They all pulled away from each other. "I'll talk to you tonight before you go to sleep, okay?" She nodded.
"Bye, Dean," Dolph smiled before walking out.
"Bye…"
"Was dinner good?" Dean chuckled as Audrey nodded her head sleepily.
"Alright," Dolph kissed her head. "I think it's time for bed…" Dean sighed as he looked at the phone screen.
"I agree. I love you, Audrey Hope. You know that?" Audrey smiled at the phone.
"I love you too, Papa," Dolph smiled down at Dean. The blonde moved to press the red button but stopped when Audrey gasped. Both men looked at her confused.
"Audrey?"
"Aren't you gonna tell Papa you love him, Daddy?" Dean gulped hard as he looked into the camera. Audrey turned in Dolph's lap and snuggled close to him, closing her blue eyes.
"Dolph, you don't-" Dean started after several minutes of silence, but was quickly interrupted.
"I love you, Dean… I love you, too." And then the screen went dark.
Those 3 words were the single most meaningful words Dean had heard in the last 3 years. Only those 3 words meant a hell of a lot more tonight than they ever did before.
So much for moving on, huh?