Ponies Shouldn't Take Drugs

by NoClip

I AM NOT A BRONY. BUT I DON'T HATE ON THEM. This is just a short story I felt like writing after learning all the ponies' names from my brony friends. I've never seen a single episode, so I hardly know the story Also, the misspelling of the ponies' names are intentional. And this is my first fanfic. Meow.

Ponies Shouldn't Take Drugs by NoClip

Once upon a time in Aquestria, Applejack made some apples…with her jack..? And with such a beautiful day, Rainbow Dash dashed with rainbows. Twilight Sparkling Grape Juice just read Twilight and thought about how Edward sparkles in that abhorrent novel. She then ripped it apart and threw it away in a furnace along with Spike's fermented body. Not long after, Rarity was…um…eating human flesh. Anyway, Rarity died after doing so. And as soon as Fluttershy fluttered with her shy, Jappleack grew a fifth leg. Gabe Newell had just finished using the restroom, which allowed Dainbow Rash to finally be at peace.

Princess Celestia heard of the incident with Rarity, which caused her to play Amnesia: The Dark Descent. She passed out. Not from playing the game, but from reading My Little Pony fanfics. Ainbow Ash continued to be at peace, for about 5 more seconds, until she finally stopped being at peace. Only one thought pursued her. Drugs. Drugs. Drugs. Irrelevantly, a meteor was about to hit Aquestria within 30 minutes. It was up to The Mane Six to hinder this heinous disaster. Oh, you thought the author forgot about Pinkie Pie, didn't you? Well, he didn't, so you should feel sad about yourself. However, he could not write much about Pinkie Pie after reading Cupcakes.

Bainrow Dash did not fall under the influence of drugs. Instead, she grew a third Pegasus wing because she took drugs. Wait. Yeah, she did take drugs. With the strength of all her wings, she used a Sonic Rainboom to move at an impossible speed. With this speed, she made an massive impact on the meteor to push it back. But somehow, the meteor moved toward Aquestria even faster, ignoring the laws of physics, because physics are lame and ugly. Dash was pushed back through this force and was flabbergasted. Suddenly the meteor spoke.

"HERRO! AH AM DUH METEEYOR DAT EEZ GOEENG TO DOO DAH DESTROI UR PLANETZ!1! !" said the excited meteor.

"Okay," said Raindash Bow.

And so the meteor destroyed Aquestria while Discord was taking a bath. The End.