Disclaimer: Nathan: Blitz doesn't own Castlevania or any of it's titles
Blitz: (Holding a box of Castlevania related stuff) Yeah I do, it's all in here.
Nathan: That's not really what I meant but okay...
Nathan's revenge
Nathan Graves sighed to himself, he had been the last to arrive at the "Castlevania Badass Protagonist's Club" meeting and he wasn't in the mood to hear the club's leader, Simon Belmont, complain about his punctuality. The Club was based in Castlevania itself; apparently after hearing that most or all of the Castlevania heroes were in the castle, Dracula and Death hightailed it, knowing that if they stuck around an ass kicking was soon to follow. Nathan had only been recently admitted into the club, despite his game being the first GBA title Castlevania had. Apparently, Simon had to have Soma look him up on the internet just to verify that Nathan was who he said he was. (Soma had to explain to some of the older members...well all of the members...that since it was 2036, they didn't have to go to a library or a church to get information anymore.) Nathan entered the main chamber of the club (a.k.a. Dracula's former throne room) to find most of the members lounging around. Thankfully, the meeting hadn't started yet.
"Hey, Nathan! What took you so long? At another Yu-Gi-Oh! Tournament?" Jonathan Morris snickered. Everyone knew that since being transported to Soma's time Nathan took a liking to a certain card game. He blushed when Jonathan made this remark, he actually was at a tournament.
"Yes, actually I won." He replied casually, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment. Jonathan and Soma looked at each other and fell out laughing. Charlotte Aulin, Jonathan's partner, giggled as well.
"They were making fun of you, Nathan." She explained, helping the two men up. Nathan sighed loudly; the two weren't exactly mean or ill-natured, they actually got along really well, but their constant taunting was wearing on Nathan's nerves.
"Now that everyone is here, we can begin the meeting." Simon said loudly, getting everyone to shut up and sit down.
"Vice-president Alucard will explain today's agenda." He added, pointing to the dhampir. Alucard stood up, holding a rather large piece of paper. The other members of the club groaned, today was going to be long.
"We must first discuss a long going debate amongst us, who here starred in what was truly the hardest Castlevania game?" Everyone perked up at this, though their debates didn't usually end well. They normally ended with Simon Belmont having to pry Alucard and Trevor apart, keeping Shanoa and Charlotte from pulling Maria's hair out, and keeping Richter from beating the hell out of Jonathan and Soma. Before everyone had a chance to start brawling again, Nathan said something unexpected.
"Please, my game make most of you look like kids..." He muttered from his chair. When it got so quiet that you could hear a pin drop from the bottom floor, Nathan looked around.
"What did you just say?" Juste Belmont asked, as if he hadn't heard the earth-shattering statement. Nathan had to choose his next words carefully, everyone was glaring at him as if he had just said that Dracula was his bestest friend.
"Err...that my game makes you look like pansies?" He said, sweating a little. Nathan was never one to choose his words carefully when he needed to. The normally quiet and polite vampire hunter usually kept just that, quiet, but he honestly felt Circle of the Moon was the hardest Castlevania game. Everyone looked ready to kill, but luckily Simon spoke up, saving the lesser known hunter.
"Can you back up your argument?" He asked. 'Thanks Simon.' Nathan thought. He cleared his throat before coming up with a suggestion.
"Why don't you all see for yourselves? I'm pretty sure I can get copies of Circle of the Moon by tomorrow night." He said sheepishly, if everyone's death stares wasn't going to make him cry in the corner, it was the fact that his argument might not hold water that would. The room was silent for a while before Simon spoke again.
"Very well, we will hold you to your word. Juste, put down the whip. Nathan is our newest member, treat him with respect for his opinions." He stated as Juste sat back down. Who knew the interior designer/vampire hunter had such a short fuse?
"Moving on, who is the cutest female character?" Alucard asked.
"Sara." Leon Belmont said quickly.
"Mina." Soma said at the exact same time, with Leon glaring at him.
"Yeah, I gotta go with Mina too." Jonathan said, backing up his friend. Charlotte didn't find this amusing at all, and neither did Soma.
"Dude, that's MY girl!" He bellowed, getting Jonathan to throw his hands up in defense. Charlotte held his arms up, signaling for Soma and Leon to wail on him as much as they wanted. Nathan sighed as the three beat the hell out of poor Jonathan, but he was thankful it wasn't him.
"I would recommend that everyone else place their votes on these ballots, lest we have another incident like this one." Alucard added, not even getting a chance to explain how this was supposed to work. Nathan looked down the choices carefully, thinking on the choice list. Shanoa? Too gothic. Maria? Wasn't she stalking Alucard? Sara? Taken. Sonia? ...Who the hell is that? Lydia? Too much hassle (Poor Juste) Charlotte? Nathan looked over at her, who was standing over Jonathan to make sure he voted right. Too scary. 'Mina it is then.' Nathan thought to himself, thanking God Soma couldn't see what he which box he placed a check mark next to. Soma was too busy placing his vote for Mina, then drawing little hearts around her name. Alucard looked over the results with an amused look on his face, something very rare for the dhampir.
"I will now tally the votes, Shanoa 3, Charlotte...-cough cough- 1 -cough cough- Maria 1, Sonia...did someone write that name in? Mina 7. Sara 1. Lydia 1. I think it's obvious who-" Alucard announced the results but was interrupted by Soma.
"Alright I want everyone who voted for Mina to raise their hands so I can cut them off! Have fun pleasuring yourselves with your BAD hands!" He shouted maniacally, waving his sword in the air like a moron. It took a right to the jaw from Simon before they could continue.
"Next item on the agenda...we have received several questions from our fanbase pertaining to our personal lives...just our luck. The first question goes to Soma...Kevin asks how far you've gone with Mina...really?" He imitated a teenager, prompting everyone to burst into laughter. Soma, recovered from the punch, stood up and took an idiotic pose.
"Well...one night Mina and I had a 'run out of gas' and -" Simon had to press something called a censor button to block out whatever Soma was saying. Nathan thought this was ridiculous, and couldn't wait for this to end. TO put it in visual terms, while Soma's words were being bleeped out he jumped on the table and started making crude thrusting gestures and slapping motions with his hand. The women had turned a bright red while the men nodded approvingly, except for Nathan, who had fallen asleep. Nathan didn't wake up until the end of the meeting, luckily for him it seemed no one needed him for anything. He was kind of offended, but he did fall asleep so he couldn't really complain.
The next night Nathan came to the meeting on time carrying a box.
"What's that? Dude, the card shop is down the street if you wanna sell your cards." Jonathan teased. Nathan only smiled in response, for he brought the ultimate weapon with him. Copies of 'Castlevania, Circle of the Moon' and Nintendo DS' for everyone.
"I was supposed to bring these, right?" He asked Simon, who was confused at how the device worked.
"What sorcery is this?" He shouted before trying to throw holy water at the game. Nathan stopped him and explained what the game was and how to play.
"This is cool and all but...where are the walkthroughs?" Soma asked, and that's when Nathan started laughing.
"It's more fun without them, enjoy guys!" He laughed while his fellow protagonists shrugged and began playing.
An hour or so later, everyone was still trying to get past the first boss.
"Madness! That laser beam should NOT be allowed in boss fights!" Leon shouted, nearly throwing his DS as the game over music sounded.
"Hey, if I did it, you all should be able to as well." Nathan explained as he sat back and kicked his feet on the table, like a boss I might add. Alucard was the first to ask a question that didn't concern a walkthrough. He just needed something simple, so he figured it was okay to ask.
"Nathan." He said quietly, appearing next to the lounging hunter.
"Yes?"
"Where is the shop in this game?" Nathan smiled ear to ear, causing Alucard to break a sweat.
"What shop?" Alucard groaned when he heard this and went back to his seat
After everyone got used to the games mechanics they managed to get a bit further. Soma spoke up this time, anger evident in his voice.
"Wait...poison actually HURTS you? C'mon!" He shouted, Nathan was too busy laughing his ass off when he heard that to see that Juste had given up, crying in the corner.
"So...aesthetically displeasing..." He muttered, looks like someone reached the underground waterway. Too bad that wasn't the only surprise in store.
"This water is poisonous!" Jonathan's shout surprised Nathan, the poisoned waters of the underground waterway never posed any issue for him. He purified them first, did Jonathan just skip over to them? Nathan decided to keep this information to himself, for he decided to take another nap.
When he awoke almost everyone was sitting at the table, except for Jonathan, who was still sitting near the window, trying to fight Carmilla.
"We've decided, Nathan." Simon said with authority, setting Nathan on edge.
"While your game is not THE hardest title of our series, it IS one of the most challenging ones. For this, you have earned entry into our 'Most Badass Protagonist' poll." He added, reaching his hand over. Nathan nodded and accepted the handshake, with everyone (except for Jonathan, of course) applauding. Nathan looked over at him in confusion.
"He does know he was supposed to purify the water first, right?" And that's when something unexpected happened. Nearly everyone, except for Charlotte, Alucard, and Simon jumped up and shouted at poor Nathan.
"WE didn't even know we were supposed to do that! Do you have any idea how many times I DIED?" Richter shouted, with the others who were not previously mentioned jumping up in anger.
"Charlotte! Can you bring me some nachos?" Jonathan asked, oblivious to the fact that he was the only one still playing. Charlotte facepalmed, then walked over to Nathan.
"I think I'll just hang out with you for a while, while dummy over there figures out that I'm not a house maid." She said, standing uncomfortably close to Nathan. He backed up fast; due to the lack of a female role in his game that wasn't psychotic, he wasn't sure how to handle girls.
"Yeah, Jonathan...gets to be a little annoying after a while." Soma added, patting Nathan on the back.
"He's...special." He added, getting the three to fall out in laughter. That's when Charlotte asked something that Nathan hoped he would never have to answer.
"So who did you vote for?" She asked referring to the cute girl poll. Apparently she forgot she only got one vote, from Jonathan, who was cowering under her out of fear. Nathan guessed she forgot, because she was looking at him with a hopeful look on her face.
"Yeah, who did you vote for?" Soma asked, if he knew Nathan voted for Mina he'd flip. Nathan did what any real man would do; he pointed to something random, and while the two looked to whatever direction he was pointing, Nathan Graves bolted out the door. When Charlotte and Soma realized this, they ran after him, shouting some very derogatory things about him and his cards.
Hours later...
"I WON!" Jonathan's shout went unnoticed. He looked around to see why no one responded to his cry of victory, only to find that everyone left a long time ago. Jonathan's confusion was replaced by happiness though, for he had finally beaten Circle of the moon.
Blitz: Nathan doesn't get enough spotlight, and him being tied for first (with Soma) in my badass protagonist contest in my opinion, I felt he deserved to get some attention. Plus I wrote this because, after 5 YEARS OF TRYING, I FINALLY beat Circle of the moon myself with NO walkthroughs...no one told me beating death would purify the water, of course... Anyway, no I don't think Soma or Jonathan would be the bully type, but they both seem pretty immature sometimes, so the role fit for them. Seriously though, I was looking at my CotM copy like it was cursed or something. R&R!