Breaking Your Own Heart
Chapter One
A/N: Since AHS ended last night and there isn't a guarantee that we'll see Tate/Violet next season (I've learned to never believe anything Ryan Murphy or Brad Falchuk say) I decided to type this up. I'm not exactly sure where this fic is headed but I do have a few ideas so if this is something you guys are interested in reading, I'd love to give it a shot.
This picks up a few months after the finale scene between Tate and Violet. This is also my very first time writing any type of fanfiction so I'm not guaranteeing this is going to be good. I've only ever written research papers and lesson plans so we'll see how this goes.
Violet isn't exactly sure when she truly fell in love with Tate. She thinks it was sometime between that day she found out she was dead and the day she told him to go away. It's kind of unhealthy, the way they love each other.
He raped her mother. He impregnated her mother.
Yet the hole Violet feels in her chest gets a little bit bigger every time she thinks of the blonde boy that is by definition an apathetic psychopath. At least that's what it says in Tate's file downstairs in her father's old office. But Violet knows Tate. She knows his heart his full of sorrow. She knows he can feel. He loves her, after all, and that's something Violet will never doubt.
What she doesn't know though, is why the darkness has such a hold on him. She's seen Tate fight it. Fight the voices in his head and he tries. He tries to do the right thing and be good. But in the end the darkness takes over and Tate does something bad, something awful and unforgivable. Violet always forgives him though. She's forgiven him for everything, the shooting, the murder of the couple that lived in the house before her. She forgave him so easily because she truly believed he wanted to change. She stills believes that.
And Violet knows what he did to her mother; Tate told her all about how he dressed up in that damn rubber suit and snuck into the Harmon's bedroom last year.
It hurts. Knowing Tate, the boy Violet is completely and stupidly in love with, touched her mother. He has been inside her, came inside her. Violet knows what it looks like when Tate comes. She knows how he grips her arms tightly as he tumbles off the edge and leans into her, brushing his lips against her throat and mumbling 'I love you' as they both come down from that high. It sickens her to even imagine him touching Vivien.
And as she sits in her room by her window, the cigarette smoking unfurling from her mouth and her fingernails digging into her palm, it sickens her even more to know that she's forgiven him for raping her mother. It makes her stomach twist into knots and her thoughts go fuzzy because she shouldn't forgive him. Tate should pay for what he did, not only to Vivien, but to everyone else that he's hurt. He should hurt just as much as Violet did when she found out about the rape.
But Violet doesn't want him to hurt, not really. She wants to be able to slide her fingers through his hair and kiss him. She wants to touch him, to be with him, and just be near him. She needs to feel him and make sure he understands that she's sorry for making him leave all those weeks ago.
She feels the same things he feels for her. She's the only light he's ever known and as much as the darkness surrounds him, he's her light, too. He's bright and he makes her smile even when she's having the shittiest days. He knows how to make her laugh and that when he kisses that spot right above her navel it makes her squirm and blush. No one else knows that and she doesn't want anyone else to ever get that close to her. She just wants Tate. And if having Tate means she has to have his darkness too, so be it.
He's her light and she forgives him. No matter how disgusting that might be.