AN: Okay so this might be considered slightly crackish and maybe a bit ooc but how could I completely ignore Megamind's killer dance moves when I'm listening to club music ;D set pre-movie
The great thing about raves were that no one cared who you were or what you looked like as long as you can keep up with the music and keep the ecstasy pumping ever faster through your bloodstream. Everyone was simply lost in the hypnotic power of the beat and the tens of sweaty young adults grinding on strangers and constantly searching for a new dance partner. This was the only time that Megamind was ever popular in his life and he couldn't get enough of it. Under the black lights, no one noticed that he was any different except for the fact that he lasted on the dance floor much longer than any one else. Every time one of these popped up (which was quite frequent and often times they were held in shady warehouses near his lair) he came wearing his prototype disguise generator. Back in his early twenties, he had not yet perfected it and testing it out was a perfect excuse to get away from Minion for a night and come here. Minion wasn't fooled however, because Sir always came home smelling like sweat, alcohol, smoke, and a few things that Minion had not ever smelled before the first time Sir came stumbling home at four in the morning.
That had been the first night that Megamind had gotten a full eight hours of uninterrupted sleep, however, so he let it pass. If he felt like he needed to rebel and do stupid shit, then he could do it. Minion didn't mind as long as he came home so exhausted that he would pass out and not have nightmares that otherwise plagued him.
So now the young man was at a rave for his sixth time and the novelty of it had not worn out yet. He had made some acquaintances under the alias "Jeremy" and these acquaintances already knew that "Jeremy" was rather unacquainted with the rave drugs. Two of the girls in their little group, whose names "Jeremy" did not know found this information... interesting. They thought it was cute, to be honest, and had no idea how he could have so much stamina without the desire inducing drug pushing him to dance longer and stronger. They could only keep up with him for half an hour tops, even while they were high as kites. The blond conspiratorially whispered to her red head friend about how she wanted to know how his stamina translated to the bedroom.
Oh, the girls hit on him and tried to tempt him, but he was revolted by their cakes on makeup, stick thin bodies (it looked normal on him but it just made women look sickly to be as skinny as he), and clothes that made them look like prostitutes. He managed to persuade them to go hit on one of the other good dancers, so they left him only mildly put off. He rolled his eyes and was about to turn back to the source of the trance music that was making the metal walls vibrate, but he froze and stared in wonder. Not ten feet from him was the best dancer he'd seen besides himself. And she wasn't dressed like a prostitute. He felt his heart thump faster from something besides the single drink he'd taken that night. The other dancer wore black leggings and an appropriately light and sexy black shirt. She had curves in all the best places and he couldn't help but smile sheepishly at her when one of her friends touched her arm and pointed him out. She smiled back and gave a little wave. She watched him as if to challenge him to come closer.
And that is what he did. He forced himself to man up and walked through the crowd that always parted for him. Here, he was famous. Here, he was a god. The woman shocked him with something he hadn't expected. She signed to him, asking him if he knew ASL. He grinned and signed back. American Sign Language was perfect for occasions like this when you could not hear words, which is why he and Minion both learned it before they broke out of prison for the first intentional time. Some evil god was really smiling down on him tonight, he thought as he conversed with the woman in a language no one else in the warehouse knew. This woman, who signed that her name was Roxanne, was perfect. She had the looks and the brains and the moves. He had never felt himself more attracted to a single person in his life. He moved his hands quickly, asking her if she'd do him the honor of dancing with him. She signed back that he was a charmer but took his offered hand and the crowd parted yet again for him as they made their way to the very center of the floor.
It was just past one am and the floor was just starting to heat up. Roxanne kept up with him far longer than any other pathetic excuse for a dancer in this place and he loved it. Everyone around them began to take notice of them and he longer they danced, the more people simply stopped and stared at the two. But he didn't notice because he was much too absorbed in the music and the way she moved. When one song faded out to begin another, the two paused for a moment, grinning at each other, both of their chests heaving for breath.
They decided to let the dance floor cool off for a bit and took off to a table in a corner of the rave, holding hands and grinning wickedly like the silly rebels they were. That was the first night that "Jeremy" ever ingested something besides a few drinks at the rave. The power couple were each handed a tiny pink pill and he looked at Roxanne warily, who shrugged her dainty shoulders slightly. He thought, eh, what the hell? and hooked his elbow with Roxanne's as they each tossed theirs back and chased it with a gulp of a sugary drink.
Oh, this was a bad idea, he thought to himself not half an hour later. He saw through rose tinted glasses and his blood pounded faster than it ever had while he was dancing. He was as sweaty as everyone else now and his judgment was clouded as he danced with his lovely dance partner. Her eyelids were wide open and she had an erasable smile on her face. His cheeks hurt from smiling so much.
Roxanne had drifted much closer to him now, her hands dancing up and down his back as they swayed. He would have been shocked normally that a such a beautiful young woman would dance so close to him and flirt with him so openly, but the heat and desire that pushed them to dance faster and closer fogged everything else out. After their lips met for the first time, they knew they were going to drown like everyone else.
Soon they were like any other temporary couple out on the floor and didn't question why they loved kissing a stranger so much. Roxanne teased his lower lip with her teeth and drifted her hands over "Jeremy's" neck, which was sensitive normally, but now that all of his nerve endings were on fire, every little tickle on his neck felt like a streak of lightning shattering through him- in the best way possible. He had no idea what he was doing any more and wasn't even really in control of himself when he pulled the brunette closer and kissed her in earnest. She smiled appreciatively and her hands tensed on his neck just a bit when their tongues met and she could taste something like fire on his lips.
He had no idea what time it was any more even though the rational part of his brain kept shouting at him- "It's 2:48, you dumbshit!" He could no longer hear the music, let alone the rational part of his brain. All his senses were devoted to touching, feeling, tasting, memorizing this moment because he knew nothing like this would ever happen again. Even if he made out with another girl on the dance floor, she could never be as perfect as the woman his hands were on tonight. He was thankful that his disguise looked perfect beneath the black light. Even if it hadn't, Roxanne wouldn't have noticed through the hazy halo surrounding her mind. No rational part of her brain even existed any more. Under the spell of the handsome young man with hands and lips like fire and the pink cloud coating everything her eyes reached, she was completely and utterly lost to her desires.
The effects of the drug on Megamind were significantly more severe than its effect on humans. At least, he was pretty sure that was the case. While Roxanne was along for the ride, he had to hold on to her for dear life. He was incapable of thought or reason and only followed the heat and Roxanne's direction. Some time after three she dragged him to a room only she and her friends knew of in the very back of the warehouse. It was much quieter now and her voice tickled his ears which still could not pay much attention to hearing things like the little gasps of breath the young adults took and the noise Roxanne made when he unconsciously backed her against a cement wall and hooked one of her legs around his waist. The rational part of his mind was screaming at him, but he was way past far gone by now.
Roxanne didn't even question it when she found out that Jeremy lived very near by and didn't even think about the strangeness of his home. They raced through it much too quickly for her to see much anyway.
Minion stood silently in shock after Megamind had literally ran past him with a girl who was giggling with him. They hadn't even noticed him standing there. Oh this is bad, this is bad! Minion panicked wordlessly when suspicious sounds came crashing through the walls between him and the reckless alien's bedroom.
There wasn't much Minion could do now but escape to a quieter room.
After the two had passed out completely, Minion took it upon himself to dress the girl and look through her wallet to figure out where she lived. He sprayed her with the tiniest amount of knock-out spray as he could and drove her back to her own home in the invisible car. In the morning, she would wake up in her own bed and think that she must've had a very vivid dream.
Megamind, however, was a mess when he woke up. At first, he just stirred a bit, stretching and trying to ignore how sore he was from head to toe. Except the soreness made everything come back to him and he sat straight up in shock.
"You are never going back there again," Minion reprimanded. "You know you just screwed yourself over, right?" Megamind only groaned in response. He would never be able to get his mind off of that brunette. He had known what would come of this, but he simply hadn't cared a bit. He sipped on sugary coffee and ignored his fishy friend. He knew what he did was stupid but there was no way to take it back now so why bitch about it?
Roxanne would always dance around in his giant brain and to be honest, he didn't mind someone so lovely prancing around there until the day he died.