Konnichi wa mina-sama! Yay! My first Inuyasha fanfic!! I'm so proud! I've been reading everyone else's but ever since I got into Inuyasha (in January) I've been dying to learn everything I could so I could write my own fanfiction.
Now I did!! I hope you like my first attempt at an Inuyasha fanfic!!
One last note: I want to warn all the Kikyou fans right now. I'm NOT a Kikyou fan and many times I call her 'baita' which is Japanese for 'bitch' because I hate her. Even more than Lila from Hey Arnold and that's A LOT O.o
DEDICATION:
I want to dedicate this, and all my fics to all the wonderful Inuyasha/Kagome authors and fans who I've read their fanfiction (you know who you are since you've read my review ^_~), who simply write the stories that I haven't read yet (gomen nasai), or who simply love Inuyasha/Kagome together. And to all the Inuyasha fans PERIOD. Plus to all who review my story! Didn't think I'd forget you ne? ^_~Anyways, please read and I hope you like!! Please review at the end!!!!
Style of writing used:
Bold letters
= thoughtsItalics
= Japanese words"…" = dialogue
Some out of the blue bold words
= emphasized wordsSi Tu Te Vas (If You Leave)
By Inuyasha-loves-Kagome (You can call me Inu-chan ^^)
Disclaimer: In Inu-chan's dreams, she owned Inuyasha…but sadly in the real world Takahashi-sama owns it…*sigh* "Takahashi-sama, can I buy Inuyasha off you? I'll settle for even Shippou-chan! I love him sooo much!! He's soooo kawaii!!" ^^
Disclaimer 2: I also don't own Enrique Iglesias song "Si Tu Te Vas" (If You Leave). He owns it. And listen to it while you read this fic if you have it. It'll make it more kawaii!!! ^^
~**~
Si tu te vas
Te lleveras mi corazon
Y yo sin ti
Ya no se por donde ir
[If you leave
You'll take my heart
And me without you
I don't know where to go]
~**~
Inuyasha leaned on the Bone Gobbling Well, his arms crossed over his chest as his face twisted into the familiar scowl that he always wore. He always wore that same scowl, but this time it was only to hide the sadness deep within. Not only sadness, but hurt as well. The hurt concentrated in his chest and made his whole body shake with an emotion that he couldn't explain. It had been caused by the stupidest thing in the world…a fight. However, it wasn't an ordinary youkai (demon) fight like always. This was a fight he had had with Kagome.
And it hurt.
~**~
Si tu te vas
Nunca te podre olvidar
Me quedo aqui
Solo pensando en ti
[If you leave
I'll never be able to forget you
I'll stay here
Only thinking about you]
~**~
Inuyasha tried to growl, but all that happened was that the scowl disappeared and his face contorted into one of sadness and worry, the emotions that he was truly feeling. Baka (stupid) girl! He thought angrily, even if the emotions didn't appear on his face. She always has to go back to her stupid time!
Though he hated to admit it to anyone, Inuyasha hated it when she went back to her time, even if she only went back for a short time. She said she had to do tests, whatever those were. He never understood any of that stuff from her time. Plainly, he didn't want to understand. All he wanted was for a certain schoolgirl to come back already so he could be near her and protect her. Even if he always complained about having to protect her.
But he wasn't sure this time. The fight had been pretty serious. It was different than all those other times when he complained about her leaving. He had really crossed the line this time…
***Flashback***
"Bitch! Where do you think you're going?" Inuyasha yelled as she began walking towards the well. She had told him that she needed to go back and take her tests but he wasn't having it. There was no way he was going to let her go. He didn't want her to go since that meant he couldn't protect her or even be near her.
Kagome stopped her approach on the well and just stood there, her back towards him. She was unmoving and Inuyasha thought that perhaps he had won. It was enough to bring a smile to his face.
"Inuyasha," she began, trying to be as calm as possible. "Why do we always have to go through this?" She refused to turn around and face him. This annoyed Inuyasha a great deal. Why won't she look at me when she talks to me?
He growled and took a step forward, supporting all his weight on the front leg. "Why the hell do you always have to go back to that stupid time? Is it more important that looking for the Shikon no Tama fragments?"
Finally she turned around to face him but instead of looking upset, she only looked mildly annoyed. Well, this was an improvement. Maybe this meant something good. "Inuyasha, I've already explained it to you a million times before! I NEED to go back, at least for a day!"
This is when his mistake was made. He growled louder and shouted at her the accursed name that she couldn't stand, especially when it came down to this. "Kikyou would NEVER have abandoned the mission! She would have put her whole heart into it!"
Pain immediately took place of her annoyed look. Inuyasha cursed inwardly as he saw her eyes scrunch up and tears begin to well up in them. She looked down and balled her hands at her sides. She HATED it when he compared her to Kikyou! Did he always have to do that?! Why couldn't he just shut up about that?!
Inuyasha had no idea where that outburst had come out from. He hadn't meant it or even understood why he had mentioned her at a time like this, especially since Kagome was sensitive to that name. Even worse when he used her to compare the two. Why did he have to say that? All he knew for sure was that he hadn't meant it. It was just something that he had yelled out from his anger and even his…jealousy. Deep down, he believed that she didn't really go back to her time for those tests. What she went home to was some boy who she probably liked. He was probably the complete opposite of Inuyasha himself. The thought disgusted him. He could imagine some pretty boy who was all lollipops and sunshine with her. Some boy who gave presents and candy; who wrote poetry and was all sensitive, serenading her with sweet songs that could make Inuyasha's stomach turn. Why did boys always have to act that way around girls? Why did they become soft idiots that pranced around like little sissy girls whenever they saw a pretty girl? Why didn't they just act like themselves?
Inuyasha was interrupted from his thoughts by Kagome angry outburst. "BAAAAAKKKKKAAAAAAA!!!!!!!" she yelled her lungs out, causing the birds in a nearby tree to flutter away in surprise. Tears freely streamed down her face now and she looked ready to just run and cry her eyes out. Inuyasha hated it when she cried. He hated it when any woman cried, but he especially hated it when this particular one did. Especially if he was the source of her sadness.
"K-Kagome…" he began, his face twisting into one of apology and hurt. If she had "sat" him, it would have hurt a whole lot less than seeing her cry. All the "sits" in the world would have hurt less. Hopefully he could make up with her and they could just pretend like it never happened.
No such luck. With the tears still coursing its way down her face, she turned around. "I HATE you! I'm NEVER coming back again!" Then she ran towards the well and disappeared in its depths.
Inuyasha was stuck to where he was. Had that just happened? Or was he dreaming? Perhaps he had been sleep walking and he would go back to Kaede-baba's house and she would be there, sleeping in a futon and then she'd wake up and smile her beautiful smile that made him melt like always.
He shook his head and his ears flattened against his head in sadness. No you baka! She's seriously mad at you! And all because you had to say something stupid like that!
He walked away and decided to sulk in the branches of the God Tree like he always did. Perhaps he could just nap and forget. That seemed like the right thing to do…
***End Flashback***
Si tu te vas
El dolor me comera
Un dia mas
No podre vivir sin ti
[If you leave
The pain will eat me up
One more day
I won't be able to live without you]
~**~
After he had napped, he had woken up to try and figure out if she had come back. But sadly, he didn't smell her wonderful scent. There was the one that was still lingering from when she was there this morning, but that was all.
What was he going to do now? How could he make it up to her? He didn't feel like this was like any other fight they had had. He had seriously wounded her with the comparison he had done by accident.
"Inuyasha?" a small, curious voice asked from in front of him. Inuyasha turned his gaze towards the source of the voice and saw the tiny kitsune (fox) Shippou looking at him with curious eyes. That little kitsune had gotten quite attached to Kagome, and it sent a pang of jealousy to Inuyasha everytime he thought about it. He had longed to be in Shippou's place…
Inuyasha settled with snarling at the tiny kitsune. All that came out was a tiny growl and it angered Inuyasha. It seemed that he couldn't stay angry, even with Shippou. Not as long as the hurt was there, planted deep into his heart. Shippou wasn't stupid either. Inuyasha could tell and it only made him even angrier because that meant he couldn't hide anything from Shippou. "What do you want?"
Shippou slowly walked over to the side of the well and peered down into it. "Has Kagome come back yet?"
A small smile appeared on Inuyasha's handsome features as he looked down at the ground. Perhaps he had been wrong about Shippou being intelligent. He didn't dare tell him though. He just didn't feel in the mood to mock anyone today. "No. She hasn't. And I doubt she ever will."
Shippou stood on the edge and glared at him, hands on his hips. "Okay! What did you do THIS time?!"
"Feh!" Inuyasha replied, looking off towards the woods, his gaze hard and unfeeling now. Well, that was an improvement. "None of your damn business!"
Shippou growled also and looked ready to hit Inuyasha. But he knew the dog-demon was stronger than him and held grudges for a long time. He settled on looking angry and even growling himself. "Of course it's my business! Kagome is my friend and I love her! I don't like to see her hurt!"
Inuyasha looked shocked at Sippou's outburst. He hadn't expected the little kitsune to say THAT! He made no attempt to respond since it looked like Shippou wanted to continue. "So what did you do this time?" Shippou asked in a softer tone, though his face showed that he was still annoyed with the dog-demon.
Inuyasha kept his gaze on Shippou and decided not to lie. "We had another argument," he responded bluntly. Shippou could tell when he lied so Inuyasha didn't even bother to do it.
Shippou rolled his eyes. "Duh! I knew THAT! What I want to know is what you said to her."
Inuyasha took his time in responding. If he told the truth, Shippou would be on his case until Inuyasha decided to make up with Kagome. Inuyasha didn't want to yet though so he decided to lie then and see if he could get away with it. "It was just the same old argument about her going back home."
Shippou looked at him calmly, not saying anything for a while. Inuyasha could tell that the little brat was scrutinizing him, and frankly, it was bothering the hell out of him. Inuyasha growled and flexed his claws at his side but Shippou spoke once again.
"I don't believe you," he responded, keeping the same calm look. "There is no way this is just like those other fights. There's something you're not telling me and I want to know what it is."
Inuyasha raised a curious eyebrow. "And how can you tell? All I said was that we had a fight. How the hell could you tell if I'm lying?"
"Because you took you're time in answering me before. That meant you were thinking about what to tell me." He smirked at Inuyasha's surprised look. "I may be small and young, but I'm not stupid. So what did you say to her?"
Again Inuyasha hesitated, not sure if he should tell him what had happened. He growled deep in his throat. "Like I said the first time...None of your damn business!"
That was the last straw. Shippou had been patient and fair to the dog-demon that was many times his size, but he could take only so much. He growled even louder and more threatening than Inuyasha. "Okay! Don't tell me! But I will tell you one thing! You had better go and make up with her! I bet you at the moment she's crying her eyes out and feeling miserable, even more than you do!"
That last thing he said hurt. He knew deep in his heart that the little kitsune was right. Kagome was probably in her room calling him names and just feeling like crap. Inuyasha turned his gaze in the direction of the well, a sad look in his eyes.
He had decided…
~**~
Mi lagrimas hacen un mar
Nadare sin descansar
Esperando tu llegar
Y es que estory imaginandome el final
Y me da medio pensar
Que algun dia llegara
Si tu te vas
[My tears make an ocean
I'll swim without rest
Waiting for your arrival
Because I'm imagining the end
And I'm scared to think
That that day will come
If you leave]
~**~
BAKA! she thought to herself as she cried into her pillow. WHY?! WHY DOES HE ALWAYS HAVE TO COMPARE ME TO KIKYOU?!?! NAZE (WHY)?!?!
After the fight, Kagome had come back home and headed for her room. No one was home (thank Kami-sama) but she wouldn't have cared anyway. All she cared about was a certain dog-demon who in turn hated her. Who still loved a woman that had sealed him and that was roaming around semi-alive. She admitted she was jealous of Kikyou, but that was because she loved Inuyasha so much.
She banged her pillow with her fists harder than she ever had in her life. WHY DOES HE STILL LOVE HER?!?! WHY CAN'T HE LOVE ME?!?!?
Yet a long time ago, Kagome had told herself that although Inuyasha loved Kikyou, she would stay by his side. And then eventually one day, when he chose to go with Kikyou to hell, she would let him go.
Or would she?
Would she let himself sacrifice life in order to be with his old love?
You just answered your own question a voice inside her head told her. He loves Kikyou so of course he'd rather be dead and with her, than alive and without her.
That only caused Kagome to cry harder.
~**~
Si tu te vas
Se me ira todo el valor
Y so se que nunca encontrare otra igual
Si tu te vas
El dolor me comera
Un dia mas
No podre vivir sin ti
[If you leave
All my courage will leave me
And I know that I'll never find another (like you)
If you leave
The hurt will eat me up
One more day
I won't be able to live without you]
~**~
Inuyasha watched silently from outside Kagome's window. With his hanyou hearing, he was able to hear her heart-wrenching sobs, and with his hanyou nose, he was able to smell her soft, innocent, and flowery scent mixed with salt…
…The smell of tears…
Inuyasha's heart wrenched and his face contorted into one of sadness. Gomen ne Kagome. I wish I knew how to comfort you.
Baka! a voice scolded. All you have to do is go in there and say your sorry.
Another voice argued with the first. But what if she's too hurt to listen to you? What then? It's only make everything worse, especially the pain.
The first voice argued back. Don't listen to him. He doesn't know what he's talking about. He's the baka one who's always making you more and more confused on who you want when the evidence is right in front if you. Kagome is the one you love and you know it.
"…" Inuyasha looked pensive. Was the voice right? Was it really Kagome who he loved? For a long time now he hadn't been able to choose between an old love and a new love. While he felt he owed Kikyou because of her death, he also couldn't deny that he had feelings for Kagome.
The first voice interrupted again. Kikyou was just a prologue to your destiny. If you hadn't met her, then you would never have met Kagome. She's you true love. The one you were born for. You love Kagome more than you ever did Kikyou. You've never trusted Kikyou enough like you do Kagome, and you wouldn't even protect Kikyou like you do Kagome. And what about the feeling you get when you're around her? You feel at home…accepted…like you belong somewhere. Tell me, have you ever felt that way when you were with Kikyou? Did you?
No Inuyasha confessed.
And what about that acceptance part? the voice continued. Kikyou wanted you to be human. Kagome doesn't care what you are, as long as you're happy. She wouldn't even care if you turned into a youkai, but she fears for your safety. How much more proof do you need?!
Inuyasha realized, for the first time in a long time the truth behind those words. Kikyou HAD wanted him to be human, and for her own personal gain. If he was human, then she could be a normal woman. She didn't care about him. She was just using him.
Inuyasha felt like his eyes had been opened. Like they were once blocked by something and now cleared. Realization can strike like a lightning bolt but it actually felt good to realize something that you should have know a long time ago.
He loved Kagome…purely and truly. And with all of his heart…
NOW GO TO HER!!!
Gathering as much courage as he could, Inuyasha pried the window open, and stepped in…
~**~
Mis lagrimas hacen un mar
Nadare sin descansar
Esperando tu llegar
Y es que estory imaginandome el final
Y me da miedo pensar
Que algun dia llegara
Si tu te vas
[My tears make an ocean
I'll swim without rest
Waiting for your arrival
Because I'm imagining the end
And I'm scared to think
That that day will come
If you leave
If you leave
If you leave
If you leave]
~**~
Kagome jumped when she heard a sound at her window. She sat up like a bolt and wiped her tears. She knew who it was. No one else would use the window. She wanted to feel angry, to yell, but she couldn't. The hurt was too much and it was consuming her, taking away all of her anger.
Inuyasha was standing there, looking hurt and ashamed, his arms hung loosely at his sides. He watched the dried up tear trails on her cheeks and cursed at himself over and over again for the fight. She had never deserved to be sad. What a BAKA he was!
"Kagome…" he began, but she cut him off.
She shook her head and turned her gaze away. She didn't want to face him. And why was he here anyway? Did he want to drag her back so they could continue the journey? Probably that was it. "I'm not going back," she said in a surprisingly calm voice, though the cold tone she used made Inuyasha cringe. "I already told you that."
He wasn't swayed from his goal so easily. "Kagome, gomen nasai (I'm so sorry). I didn't mean to hurt you," he whispered, wondering why she wasn't exploding.
Kagome was wondering the same thing. But she refused to meet his gaze. "Yameru (stop). I don't care for your apologies." Why did he have to be there and make the hurt worse? Was he also here to tell her that he loved Kikyou and that he was going to choose her? Onegai (please)…iie (no)…kami-sama (God)…
"Iya (No)!" he yelled and used one clawed hand to redirect her head towards him. He gazed into her sad, pain filled eyes and felt again the hurt. It was as if both of them were transmitting it between them. "Listen to me…"
Kagome's eyes narrowed, but she still blushed because his face was so close. If she or he moved a tiny bit of an inch closer, then they'd kiss. "Why should I?" she challenged in an icy tone.
Inuyasha kept his gaze intent. He was aware of the closeness of their faces but it didn't make him blush because he was too determined. "Datte (because)…Aishiteru (I love you)…"
Kagome's eyes widened at not only his words, but also on the fact that after confessing his love, he brought his face closer to her. At first he brushed his lips against hers, just tasting her for the first time, before letting himself drink, fully tasting her and enjoying every savory detail. Her smell drove him crazy and he used his free hand to wrap around her waist, bringing her closer. The hand holding her face softened (although it already was) and began to caress her cheek, sending shivers down Kagome's spine.
Nani?!? Kagome's mind screamed as she was rigid, not kissing back because of the shock. Did he just tell me he loved me? And is he really kissing me? Oh Kami-sama, please don't let this be a dream…
Inuyasha pulled his lips away slightly, his eyes glazed, yet filled with love…for her. "Kiss back Kagome," he whispered, just barely audible.
Kagome then wrapped her own arms around Inuyasha's neck and he brought his lips back towards hers. Only that this time Kagome was kissing back, and both were lost in each other. The rest of the world didn't matter. All that mattered was this moment.
But then a thought needs to invade the mind…
"But what about Kikyou?" Kagome whispered when they finally pulled away. There was still that doubt that lingered in her mind, even though he had said he loved her.
Inuyasha looked at her with eyes filled of undying love. "Kagome, believe in my words when I say this." He went back to caressing her cheek softly. "I never loved Kikyou like I love you. But if I had never met her, then I would never had met you and fallen in love with you. You ARE who I am truly destined for. You are my soul-mate. My only love. My one and only."
That was all the reassurance Kagome needed. Her smile broke out all over her face, a truly genuine one that sent Inuyasha's heart free of all the guilt and pain he had ever felt in his life. Then her she leaned forward and kissed him again, this time passionately and with more love.
"Aishiteru Inuyasha," Kagome whispered when they pulled apart slowly, her mind in a jumble from all the kissing.
"Aishiteru," he whispered, smiling at her with love and adoration, "Ore no koishii (my beloved)…ore no meito (my mate)…"
~**~
Mis lagrimas hacen un mar
Nadare sin descansar
Esperando tu llegar
Y es que estoy imaginandome el final
Y me da miedo pensar
Que algun dia llegara
Si tu te vas
[My tears make an ocean
I'll swim without rest
Waiting for your arrival
Because I'm imagining the end
And I'm scared to think
That that day will come
If you leave
If you leave
If you leave]
(Whispers) Si tu te vas…
[If you leave…]
~*Owari*~
Wai!!! I FINALLY finished this!! I started it weeks ago but I haven't been able to finish because I'm working on 4 other fanfics - -;; I'm such a procrastinator.
Oh well ^^
Please review!! I hope you liked it!! I tried to make it as fluffy and romantic as possible.
Hmm, perhaps I should change my name to "Fluff Queen" or "Queen Fluff". I'm such a romantic.
Anyways, I have many other Inuyasha fics that I want to write out and I hope you stick with me and read them when they come out. I've got about 10 fics in the making. Many of them are Inu/Kag fics but I also have an idea for a Kouga/Kagome fic since I feel so sorry for him :( Then there's my many chapter fic that won't be coming out for a while but there are other fics that are one-shots that hopefully will be done.
I even want to write a Shippou/some girl fic. He's my FAVORITE character!! He's soooo kawaii~!!!!!
Enough of my babbling. Please review!!!!! I want to know how I did. And only constructive flames are welcome!!!!
Signed,
Inuyasha-loves-Kagome (you all can call me Inu-chan ^^)
Email: hitomi_fanel1111@yahoo.com