Song by: Within Temptations
Song name: Memories
She couldn't believe what he had done. She couldn't believe how stupid he had been. She couldn't, wouldn't believe that he was dead, even if his cold lifeless body was in front of her face. She heard a voice from behind try to comfort her. It was her mom, Ellen.
"Jo, I'm sorry..." said Ellen, as she hugged her. Jo saw a few tear stains on Ellen's face. This surprised her because she had never seen her mom cry like this ever since her dad's death. Besides, she always thought her mom had hated Dean.
Jo gently pushed Ellen away, and walked away from her, from everyone, from him. She went to her room upstairs, where she locked her door and collapsed onto her bed, breaking into uncontrollable sobs, silent tears flowing freely from her face.
In this world you tried,
Leaving me alone behind.
There's no other way,
I pray to the gods let him stay.
The memories cease the pain inside,
Now I know why.
As the tears gradually lessened, she became angry at God for taking him away from this world, angry at Sam for being the reason for his fatal deal, but most of all she hated Dean for making the deal in the first place. She hated everyone, but hated him the most for leaving her like this. She could remember his handsome face, his smell, his touch, his smile. All of the memories of him repeated themselves in her mind, both good and bad. She smiled as she recalled one particular memory, when they had first met. She had him at gunpoint, and had punched him in the face when he swiped her gun.
All of my memories keep you near.
In silent moments,
Imagining you here.
All of my memories keep you near,
In silent whispers, silent tears
She listened for fragments of the funeral speech Bobby had prepared.
"...he was a hunter as well as close friend..."
Not just a close friend, he was my love..
"... He was a Winchester like his father, and he never stopped taking risks to protect those he loved..."
Jo recalled the time when she found Dean after a possessed Sam had shot him. She remembered his reactions as she tried to tend his bullet wound. But even when he was shot, she remembered how determined he was to save Sam.
"...He was loyal, even if he was headstrong from time to time..."
"...he fought hard against evil, even though it took his life in the end..."
Made me promise I'd try,
To find my way back in this life.
Hope there is a way,
To give me a sign you're okay.
Reminds me again it's worth it all,
So I can go home.
"...he was a soldier, both loyal and strong, he was everything we imagined a hunter to be...although he is dead, we can only hope he will rest in peace..."
At that statement, Jo became angry. How can anyone rest in peace while in Hell? The demons must be having a party in Hell, waiting a chance to get back at the Dean Winchester. Not everyone knew that Dean had gone to Hell, only a select few. Ellen, Jo, Bobby, and Sam.
All of my memories keep you near.
In silent moments,
Imagining you here.
All of my memories keep you near.
In silent whispers, silent tears.
After the speeches were over, she heard the prayers the minister came to give. Wiping the lingering tears from her cheek, she turned her mp3 player. She heard a knock on her door, but ignored it by turning the music up. She really didn't want to talk right now, to anyone. She wanted to be by herself. Soon, her eyelids became heavy, and she succumbed to sleep, where she dreamt of Dean when he was alive and smiling.
--
"Dean?"
"Yeah?" It was really him, the unmistakable voice, smell, and feel of him.His warmth, his godly smile...
Jo rushed to hug him, punching him chest.
"Dean, I miss you so much right now, why did you do it? Why did you have to die?"
Dean winced as she hit him. Even if he was used to the pain, Jo's punches could end him up in a coma. She eventually stopped, only to end up sobbing. Continuing to embrace her, Dean smiled.
"Jo, I'm sorry, but this is what a hunter's gotta do for family."
Jo looked up, her watery eyes meeting his vibrant green ones.
"But why didn't you try harder to live? Why didn't you tell me?"
Dean scoffed, and replying, "I did try, and I didn't want to tell you. I was afraid you'd end up crying like you are now."
Jo abruptly stopped crying and pushed Dean away, a little pissed off at his last comment. She turned around and walked away. Dean worried that he had offended Jo, ran after her, kissing her on the lips.
My god, this is too good to be real...
Jo could feel the softness of his lips, although they were a little chapped around the edges. She couldn't help but smile at Dean, her anger forgotten.
"I want you to smile for me while I'm gone okay?"
Jo nodded, "okay"
The next words that came out of Dean's mouth made Jo's heart skip a beat.
"Jo, I'll always be yours and yours only. I love you babe"
Smiling, she snuggled close to him, "I love you too Dean"
Dean smiled back and took off his necklace. Handing it to Jo, he kissed her on the cheek, and took one last look at her before he vanished completely.
Together in all these memories,
I see your smile.
All of the memories I hold dear.
Darling you know I'll love you,
Til the end of time.
--
Jo woke up from her amazing dream.
Too bad it's just a dream... thought Jo. That is until she raked her hand through her hair and felt something foreign in her hand. She looked and saw that it was Dean's necklace, the one he would always wear.
The one he had given her in her dream..Her heart raced, had someone given it to her while she was asleep? She checked the door, it was still locked. The dream had been real. Looking at her digital clock, it was only 5:32pm. She still had time to say good-bye to Dean before he would be taken away for the final burial processions. Racing downstairs, she found that it was empty. She stroked Dean's still handsome face, brushing away and dust that had happened to settle on his face. It looked as if he was just asleep. She placed her father's knife in Dean's hands and leaned down to kiss Dean on the cheeks. Jo whispered "love you" into his ear and stepped back. She waited with him as until Bobby and Sam took him away. As they closed the coffin lid, she could have sworn she saw a small smile form on Dean's lips. She felt no sadness, only a feeling that Dean was still with her in her memories.
All of my memories keep you near
In silent moments,
Imagining you here.
All of my memories keep you near,
In silent whispers, silent tears.
All of my memories...