notes: au future fic
warnings : major character death, self-harm, suicide triggers, schizophrenia.
because slightly broken's just what I need
"in the moonlight I felt your heart
quiver like a bow string's pulse
in the moon's pale light
you looked at me
nobody knows your heart
when the sun has gone I see you
beautiful and haunting but cold
like the blade of a knife so sharp so sweet
nobody knows your heart."
—Sasha Lazard (Mononoke Hime)
The loss of her child couldn't have felt more painful.
It takes her two weeks before she spirals out of control and blacks out in the middle of the night. Two weeks of crying. Of locking herself in her room. Of starving herself. Of avoiding any human contact and finally, she does it.
Hayley Marshall throws herself off the balcony.
; ;
When she wakes up, Klaus is the one who ends up holding her close and cradles her in his arms. She feels like she's a child. But he must be the only person in the world who could share her pain.
"You're fine," he whispers, hands trembling. "You're alive," he says, and it's as if he's talking to himself. He's reminding himself, that he's still here. He's living. "Everything's going to be all right."
Hayley doesn't speak and only listens to Klaus as he goes on and on.
(She looks in to his eyes and she recognizes the maddening shock he carries.
They say that only the insane talk out loud when they are alone).
; ;
That night, he falls asleep beside her.
She lets her hands rest over his because she knows he's still awake. He's just pretending. People like them don't sleep. People who have gone through so much pain lose their ability to sleep.
"Do you hear them?" Hayley asks, as Klaus opens one eye. "The voices," she specifies. "Do you hear voices?"
Klaus presses his forehead against hers and sighs. "Sometimes." He admits.
"I hear them all the time." She reveals to him. "I hear them right now."
He places his hand over her eyes and pulls her close. He crushes her against his chest. "You won't hear them anymore." Klaus assures her.
Hayley knows that it's a lie.
; ;
Looking after her becomes his own salvation.
She speaks to walls and he brings her breakfast in the morning. It's quite an ordinary day. One of her better days even, since she's not screaming at her own reflection and throwing glass cups out the window. The quiet curse of insanity is unexpectedly comforting.
The consequence here is that one must never befriend an illness, for it will only grow stronger with time.
; ;
It's okay, she lies to him under the moonlight, it's okay to lose me too.
It's not. But she's tired of fighting.
She's tired of trying.
Don't leave, he would tell her, if he wasn't so terrible with words. Please stay, nobody ever stays.
"You'll be okay," she whispers in to his ear. "You're always okay. You always make it." He's been through so much after all, and her pain is nothing compared to his years of endless torture.
; ;
(She leaves on a cold Tuesday morning.
He follows her in to the darkness).
notes: I probably should have put slightly ooc as a warning, and this is taken straight from my tumblr drabbles (link on my bio, if you ever wanna read more drabbles by me). Oh, and I would absolutely love it if you left me a review!