I didn't want to go. No, I did want to stay. I remember wanting to be with him forever. But now, I'm so old that I can't even do that. I just lay in bed and stare outside. I don't want to have the clone, I just want to see him, just once before I die. I just want to see the doctor.

My blond hair turned gray and I can remember just a fraction of my adventures with him. I wish I could die knowing them all. I do know I was in love with him. I want him back to be with me, if only for a moment. I had spent all that time with the clone, and yes I loved him dearly. But I still wanted to see my first love. He may be a clone, but they aren't exactly the same, and the same doctor is what I want.

Captain Jack Harkness was a good soul too, I think it was me who accidentally made him immortal. I didn't mean to though, I only meant to save his life I think.

I can still hear daleks exterminate from the darkness as I fall asleep, and cybermen's upgrades continue to haunt my dreams. The people who died because of me or the doctor, and the people we saved are constantly in my mind. He thought I could put this life behind me, and I could live a nice normal life away from all the old monsters. He was wrong because the monsters just live in my mind, though I'm sure if he was here he would vanquish them as well.

All the times where I questioned the doctor died, and all the times I wish he or me even would of said more grows. I wish I had asked more questions, known more about him. I barely knew him even though I spent so many years with him. He was mysterious, funny, very compassionate and I wish he was here to stand over my death bed and hold my hand as I passed away. But this is my death, so I guess I am fated to be alone. I guess this is another sign of the life the Doctor didn't want me to live: forever alone.

A hold on to the doctor's face in my memories and try to fall asleep. My eyes shut, my breathing finally steady. No noise except maybe one.

"Doctor who?"

And I smile a little as I blissfully fall asleep for eternity with those words echoing in my ears.