There is no actual yaoi in this story. -watches as all the yaoi fans walk away in disappointment- Oh my gosh, my dog will not shut up. :x I mean, I don't have a dog... -does crazy Jedi mind tricks- You are a chicken...you are a chicken... Anyway, this was just something I wrote while at the car dealership one morning. And also if you enjoy this jumble of letters tell me. And if you hate it, tell me as well. And if you think this is the most awesomest coolest thing in the world of awesome cool then you are a very disturbing person and I want nothing to do with you. xD

Lupin Yaoi

By D. Ant

The Message

Lupin checked his email. He got one that caught his eye and clicked on it, reading the message:
'Hey Lupin, you have got to read this. It's hilarious.'
It was from Fujiko, a url to another site underneath the message.
He clicked the link, sitting back and reading.
Fujiko was right. It was hilarious.
"What's so funny?" Jigen asked curiously.
Lupin was too busy laughing to answer.
"You okay?" Goemon asked.
The two walked up behind Lupin and peered over his shoulder, reading what was showing on the screen. What they saw didn't amuse them.

The Mission

The two got serious. They forced Lupin to find out who wrote it and where the person lived.
"Find it or die a horrible death," threatened Jigen.
Lupin knew he was serious and so he got busy, hacking into multiple sites and getting waht he needed.
"Do you have it yet?" Goemon was impatient and getting more so by the second.
Lupin didn't answer. He continued searching, printing out some stuff and handing it to Goemon. "Here."
Goemon looked over the information and then handed it to Jigen.
Lupin watched as they left. "I thought it was funny..." he muttered, shrugging as he went back to reading.

The Stakeout

The two arrived at the location. It was a little after eight at night. Jigen parked the car across from the house, the lights off.
The two sat in silence and waited. Jigen's foot tapped in anger.
"You need to calm down."
Jigen scoffed.
"I want a piece of him, too."
"Yeah," Jigen sighed.
A few minutes later a two door sports car pulled up into the driveway.

The Takedown

Jigen and Goemon stepped out of the car. They met the man as he was unlocking his front door.
"Don't try anything stupid," Jigen said as he shoved the man against the door, his gun pressed firmly into the man's back.
The man was nervous and scared.
"Open the door," Goemon instructed.
The man did as he was told, stepping inside the door.
Jigen shoved the man forward.
He stumbled, but kept on his feet, turning and looking at the two. "Please," he begged, "just take whatever it is you need. You can have everything. Just take it all, please."
Evil smiles came across the faces of Jigen and Goemon.
The man screamed as he was violently and hideously slaughtered in his living room.
"Teach you to say we're gay," Jigen said as he put another bullet in the man's head.
"I'm sure there are more like him out there," Goemon said, staring down at the mutilated body.
"We can threaten Lupin again and get all their names."
Goemon nodded as they left the house and headed back to the car.

The Lesson

Lupin yaoi is the devil. Writing it will get original characters with no name who drive sports cars violently slaughtered. Think of the original characters...

My after story note: The phrase "Lupin yaoi is the devil" is just something I say. Yaoi, Lupin yaoi especially, is something I am not a fan of. And I really don't care if others write it. It's just one less thing for me to read. :3