Me: Request fic for amore1993 that I should have uploaded long, long ago.
It's a SasuIno, which I've never done before, but it's a pairing I've always been interested in. I like SasuIno and SasuHina over SasuSaku…basically I like anyone who isn't totally in love with Sasuke. I guess it's the same reason I don't like NaruHina all that much – I've never been in the kind of love that is portrayed by Sakura for Sasuke and Hinata for Naruto, so I can't really connect with it. I'm still young, so I'm not really disappointed that I haven't experienced "true love". Maybe someday...
Until then, I'm going to portray what love has been like for me up until now: like having a best friend with whom you are physically affectionate and whom you really enjoy the company of.
This is part 1 of 2. It shouldn't get too deep or heavy, it's just a fun little story.
Enjoy!
Sasuke does not understand girls.
Which, everyone says when he asks them, is to be expected, because he is only seven years old.
Sasuke is of the general opinion that girls are annoying and icky. Their voices are too high and they smell like a gross combination of nail polish and strawberry shampoo and when he walks by they stare and whisper and giggle.
This behavior only started recently, so he still has hope that they will soon discontinue that last practice.
But mostly girls are stupid. He's tried to talk to them a few times (mainly at the insistence of his mother) but when he does, they squeal and run away, hiding behind trees and slides and their friends and staring at him, yet again.
He will admit that some of the girls are interesting. Haruno Sakura is not quite as annoying as the rest, preferring to smile bashfully and blush instead of grinning and grabbing at him. Her hair is pink, something he has never seen before, and sometimes he likes to pretend that it's a giant wad of bubblegum stuck to the top of her head. Ukumi Tenten has told him she thinks he is cute, but not in the usual way – she talks to him like one would talk to a baby. She is a year older than him, and much, much taller. This irritates him, but he has decided that as long as she is not trying to plant kisses on his face, he can live with it. And Hyuga Hinata does not really like him at all; she is much more tolerable than the rest, and the few times their parents have forced them together she has largely ignored him. Because of this, Sasuke has decided that if he ever has to be friends with any girl, ever, it should be Hinata.
And there is one more girl that stands out from the rest, but not because she isn't annoying, or because she doesn't like him. On the contrary, she likes him very much. But she is much…nicer about it than all the others. She waves at him in the hallway and plays with him at recess and lets him have tomatoes from her lunch salads. She does not smell like strawberry shampoo – she smells like some kind of flower, one that he has never cared to discover the name of. He doesn't really like flowers, he thinks they're pretty useless. But Yamanaka Ino is far from useless. Ino is the smartest girl in the class, because she always raises her hand for the answers. And Ino is the best at kickball, because she isn't above getting her shoes and skirt dirty. Ino has never tried to kiss him, not even once. And when he talks to her, she stands tall and looks him straight in the eye.
Sasuke likes Ino. But – not like-likes her. She's a girl. Girls are kind of icky.
It is the first day of sixth grade. His best friend is Uzumaki Naruto. His main rival is also Uzumaki Naruto. He still does not like strawberry shampoo.
He is sitting in the back of the classroom with Hinata, who, as decided when he was a child, has become his best female friend. That title is ambiguous, as he is certain she does not like him. And he isn't even talking about romantic like – he's pretty sure Hinata is indifferent to him in every way. She does not like him, she does not hate him. She treats him with the same timid, respectful politeness that she uses with everyone else.
It could not get any better than that.
Hinata likes to sit by the window, so Sasuke is sitting behind her. They do not speak; they never really speak to each other. Usually they just pass the time in companionable silence (with maybe a bit of anxiety on her part). Right now they are writing about what they want to accomplish in middle school, as per the first assignment given to them by their new teacher.
Sasuke thinks for about half a second before he begins.
Goal for middle school: To graduate middle school.
Goal for sixth grade: To pass sixth grade.
Anything you would like me to know about you?: No.
His paper is mostly blank, but there is no word minimum, and he has satisfactorily finished all three questions, complete sentences notwithstanding. He stands up and walks to the front of the room, hands his paper to the teacher, who glances at it uneasily, as if about to make a remark about his lack of elaboration – but she lets him go back to his seat without making a fuss.
Everyone else is still writing.
He becomes bored quickly, and so leans forward to look over Hinata's shoulder, perusing what she has written. Her goals are simple ones, mainly things like making more friends (he tries not to take that one personally), improving her skills in science and finishing the school year with all As. That last one is more for her father's benefit than her own, he knows – the same thing applies to him. If he graduates with anything less than a stellar academic record, his own father will be ashamed and in grief for years to come. Overdramatic, yes, but not far from the truth.
Sasuke sits back in his seat, bored again. A few more students walk up to the teacher to hand in their papers, but for the most part the class is not done yet. The teacher announces that they have one minute to finish up, and Sasuke can see that Hinata is writing harder now, faster, trying to squeeze in any necessary information. She is a classic overachiever, and has many a time quietly (and a bit reproachfully) told him that he should work harder, too. He doesn't really mind these sparse lectures. At least she gives them in a small, mousy voice.
Time is up, and the remaining students are instructed to pass their papers forward to the front of the row. Sasuke patiently waits while the kids behind him assemble their goal sheets, then grasps the pile as it is handed to him. Hinata, who is working furiously now, is clearly not done yet, so he cuts her a little slack and keeps the papers at his desk for a few seconds. He glances down to see what his classmates have written.
Yamanaka Ino's paper happens to be on top, and he reads it with some interest. She has girly handwriting, lots of curls and loops, but overall neat and orderly. Ino has flippantly stated that all her goals have already been accomplished, or they soon will be. Just to be clear, she has written a list of them, and checkmarked the ones she has already achieved. The list includes things like obtaining a new wardrobe, getting her parents to let her get pierced ears, and making it onto a club volleyball team. There are but two unchecked items, and those are getting all As throughout her middle school career and obtaining a boyfriend.
Sasuke nearly snorts out loud at the last one. While Ino is indeed focused on school and extracurricular activities, she also has an avid interest in the male gender. She is a typical preteen girl. But Ino has managed to phrase this and some of her other less noble goals in a way that makes them appear not totally shallow, a feat which he has to admire, if only a bit.
Mostly, he is just glad that she did not specifically name him in her goal for a boyfriend.
He and Naruto are walking along the sidewalk, discussing summer plans. Well, to be clear, Naruto is discussing, and Sasuke is acknowledging him with a few murmurs and grunts.
The blonde boy is convinced that now that they have completed their freshman year, they can do whatever they want. Being in high school, being (theoretically) able to do things like drive a car and go out late at night, has given him an inflated sense of self-importance, which he has persisted in sharing with Sasuke. According to Naruto, this is the summer that they will get girlfriends, get their driver's permits, and make the football team. Sasuke is really more of a soccer and basketball person, but as he listens to Naruto rant and ramble excitedly he thinks it better to not even try to mention it. There is no possible way to get a word in edgewise around the boy.
Sasuke also decides not to mention that he already has a girlfriend, as of this morning. Haruno Sakura has asked him out, and he saw no reason to object. She isn't grossly hideous or infuriatingly vapid. Quite the opposite – Sakura is very pretty, and one of the smartest people he knows. Any boy would have been proud to have her as a girlfriend, and, he supposes, he is. She will keep his less radical fangirls at bay because of her title as his girlfriend, and his more radical fangirls at bay because she has threatened to beat up anyone who has the slightest interest in him. For this, he is grateful, if not perplexed (and perhaps a little frightened). Sakura is quite scary when she needs to be, and when his admirers come calling, the need arises.
Despite Sakura's nasty temper, Naruto has been in love with her since they were kids – and Sakura has been in love with Sasuke for just as long. While Naruto prattles about the beach and downtown and wild high school parties, Sasuke muses that it is probably best that Naruto find out about their relationship from someone other than himself. Because Sasuke knows of no way to be nice about it – how does one go about telling their best friend that they are currently dating the girl said best friend was infatuated with? It is a daunting task, and Sasuke is not feeling up to it today.
In fact, he is headed over to Hinata's later, to unwind after a trying school year; to watch movies or read or something. Hinata has grown nicer to him, mainly because she has a crush on Naruto and Sasuke is said boy's best friend. Sasuke is aware that she is, in her own unassuming and meek way, using him, but he doesn't really care.
" – and it'll be the biggest barbecue the world has ever seen! Hey teme, you should go out with Ino."
The transition is so sudden and careless that Sasuke nearly misses it. One minute Naruto is talking about a party, and now he is on the subject of the Uchiha's love life. Oh goody.
"Oh?" says Sasuke, sensing that Naruto is looking for some kind of response this time.
The blonde smiles goofily. "Yeah. She's hot, and she's single. And she has a huge crush on you."
"Hn."
"I'd probably date her, 'cept my heart belongs to Sakura-chan."
Sasuke can't resist the opportunity to put him down. "Like she'd date you."
Naruto's smile drops, to be replaced by a pouting frown. "That's not true," he defends himself. "I could get her to go out with me."
"I doubt it."
"Teme!" he whines. "Why don't you ever have any faith in me?"
Sasuke shrugs. "If I'm going to put my faith in anything, it's not going to be you, baka."
Naruto's lower lip juts out, one of two responses he has when Sasuke decides to torment him. The other is to explode in rage. "Cruel," he sniffs. They walk on in silence for another moment or two, before Naruto tries again, "C'mon, Sasuke, why don't you wanna go out with her?"
Naruto is so obvious that it hurts. His plan is to get Sasuke and Ino together so that hopefully he can have Sakura to himself. Brilliant plan, but where's the part where I'm dating Sakura? Sasuke thinks sarcastically, a little amused at the irony. "What's so special about Ino?" he asks lazily. "What does she have that…oh, Sakura doesn't?"
At the mention of Sakura, Naruto flushes with anger. "Oi! Don't go getting any ideas about Sakura-chan!" He thumps his chest, reminding Sasuke of a caveman. "She's my girl."
Oh, the delicious irony.
Sasuke sighs, resigned. "Calm down. You didn't answer my question."
Naruto's face loses its angry hue, and he instead looks thoughtful. "Well, she's really smart…"
"So's Sakura."
"Ah, right, right…um…she's pretty."
"Again, Sakura."
"She's awesome at volleyball!"
"Sakura plays tennis."
"She's great at painting!"
"Sakura writes poetry."
"She's got good fashion sense!"
"Sakura does too."
"She has a job at the flower shop!"
"Sakura volunteers at the hospital."
Naruto, frustrated, blurts out, "She has great boobs!"
Silence.
Naruto smirks triumphantly, and Sasuke does not reply. Because…well, Sakura does have breasts. They are just not…great breasts.
And two things occur to Sasuke at the same time – one of them is that he has just defended Sakura from Naruto (which is supposedly his duty as a boyfriend, but it feels weird) and rather ardently, too. Before Naruto can realize this as well, he says smoothly, "Congratulations, Naruto. You just successfully argued that the love of your life was inferior to another girl."
Realizing his mistake, Naruto's eyes widen. "Oh nooooooo!" he wails. "What have I done? Teme, please don't tell Sakura-chan. I was just trying to make a point - !"
"Sure. The point that you like Ino better than Sakura."
"Aarrrgh! I'll kill you, you bastard!"
And as Sasuke dodges Naruto's wild punches, he ruminates on his other revelation – that despite Sakura and Ino being equal in almost every way, there is something Ino has that Sakura doesn't. They've listed all the activities the girl participate in, their intelligence and facial attractiveness, but they didn't go too far into their personalities. He knows that's to be expected – males in general are not known for ruminating on how compassionate or how good of a friend a girl is. Frankly it's mostly about looks.
But something…bothers him. It isn't something deemed important by a pubescent boy, like breast size, or even something decided by genetics, like hair color. Ino has something that Sakura just doesn't.
And Sasuke can't even determine what it is.
They are in summer school when Ino makes her move.
Having a birthday in July gives him the nice advantage of turning sixteen before pretty much everyone else. It also ensures that he qualifies for driving school, and not only his permit, but his license. Ino, who would never waste a precious elective on driver's ed during the school year, is also in the class.
"I heard you were going out with Forehead," she says immediately, not wasting time on a greeting that he will not return.
He doesn't ask who told her, because it is obvious. Though Sakura is not usually the boasting type, not even a saint would miss the opportunity to brag about managing to snag their eternal rival's love interest.
"Hn," he says.
She rolls her eyes at his typical answer and leans forward, resting one hand on his desk and keeping one of her hip. From where he is sitting, he would have an excellent view down her shirt if he craned his neck a little – which he will not do, because he has a little more tact than that. It is not an intentional move; she is probably so used to it by now that she doesn't even notice when she does it. Such is Ino's world.
"You could do better," she tells him point-blank.
He is caught between annoyed and amused. "Like you?"
She gives him a 'duh' look. "Yes, like me." She straightens up, looking down on him, hand still on her hip, and makes quite an impressive picture. "I'm more intelligent than she is. I know for a fact that she only scored a 92 on her last English essay, while I scored a perfect 100. I'm a better athlete – she plays tennis, but I play volleyball and I swim. And I'm prettier." Here, she tosses her head a bit, and she does for a moment look so dazzling that he almost considers what she is offering, before catching himself.
Ino is a teenage dream, a blonde with beauty and more self-confidence than an alpha male lion. She is, he has heard, a near-perfect girlfriend, doting but not clingy, affectionate but not salacious, and able to make intelligent and interesting conversation. This last one appeals to him most.
But he is dating another girl, and dumping Sakura for Ino after only a week seems cheap and scumbag-ish. He doesn't even want the teenage dream. He wants…well, he doesn't really want anything. He doesn't even want a girlfriend. His relationship with Sakura is distant at worst, but civil at best. She adores him, and he tolerates her. It's not a perfect relationship. It's not even a good one. It's decent, and he'll settle for decent.
Ino, he is sure, would demand shows of affection and attention, and make certain that he was thinking about her on a regular basis.
And he is sure she would only be met with failure.
"I'm not dumping Sakura for you," he tells her.
She does not look disappointed or angry, as he expects, but instead just patient, like he hasn't gotten it yet. "I didn't ask you to," she says. "I'm telling you what you missed. I don't want you to break up with her, I think she deserves you." And here she leans forward again, close to his face, blue eyes narrowed, and he finds himself wondering what exactly to call that color. "But I deserve you more."
She straightens again, and walks back to her seat without another word, glance, or probably thought.
This blasé attitude perplexes him somewhat. She is not acting the part of a heartbroken teen. She is…practical, definitely. And very different from the little girl who was delighted when they were picked to be on the same doddgeball team, who was more than happy to share any tomato-related food with him at lunch, who took great pleasure in just being near him.
Is he sentimental? Does he miss that little girl?
Upon further reflection, he finds that no, he doesn't. Not that much.
Sasuke does not hold hands.
Sakura, trying her best to not appear dismayed at his brush-off, pushes her proffered hand back into her jacket pocket. Her tone is as pleasant as ever. "So, what should we do next?"
Sasuke shrugs, not making much of an effort.
If Sakura had any less affection for him, she would say something. She is, after all, a very prideful girl. Instead, out of the corner of his eye, he sees her press her lips together, choosing to remain silent.
Somewhere deep down, he recognizes the feeling of detached disappointment.
They are walking through the park in late summer, school only a week away, the air still warm. Warm enough for Sakura to wear jean shorts, although she is also donning a hoodie. Sasuke is wearing standard blue jeans and a nondescript black sweatshirt. He looks nice enough, but he knows that Sakura was hoping for a little more effort, once again.
If he were Naruto, she would not take this. She would punch him in the face, bitch him out for not trying, stomp off in a fury, and fume for the rest of the week.
It is still amazing to him what love, or imitations of it, can do to someone's personality.
They have already gone for ice cream. Sasuke hates the stuff, and when forced to consume it, just orders plain vanilla. When he was younger, he pretended he was just eating snow. Of course, when he was younger, he partook in eating ice cream about once every three years.
He has just eaten ice cream for Sakura. This counts as trying, he thinks. He has made his once-a-day sacrifice for her.
"What do you think you're going to be when you grow up?" Sakura's voice is wistful.
He answers without delay. "A company lawyer."
Sakura looks over at him, startled either at the promptness of his response, or the response itself. "What are – do you mean like a lawyer for a big corporation?"
Sasuke's voice is flat. "ChemCorp., to be exact."
She looks confused and/or interested. "Your family has stakes in that company, don't they?"
"My grandfather co-founded it."
"Oh…well, is that really what you want to do?"
"No."
Looking ever more bewildered, she asks, "Then why did you say it was?"
A few ducks are resting on the path in front of them, but when the two teens approach, the birds hastily move elsewhere. Sasuke watches them for a few seconds instead of looking back at his girlfriend. "You asked what I thought I was going to be. Not what I wanted to be."
"Oh! Sorry, I…w-what do you want to be?"
He shrugs. "I don't know. Doesn't make sense to think about it too much, because what I will end up being is a ChemCorp. lawyer."
Sakura stops walking, and he does as well, raising an eyebrow. Her brow is furrowed over mint green eyes. "That's sad," she says softly.
"Not really."
She shakes her head. "You should have the chance to choose what you want to be."
He says nothing, just turns away. He has to. He has to physically turn away from her to stop himself from telling her off. She doesn't understand. She could never understand. Her parents would never force her to follow in their footsteps – he would know, he's met them before. They are relaxed, supportive, and allow their daughter to grow and flourish outside of their shadows. Sakura, he has heard from various adults, as well as witnessed himself, is shaping up to be a promising figure in the medical field; but she arrived there on her own, not because someone told her she should be. Not because her family has ties to that particular line of work.
"Sometimes you don't have a choice," he hears himself mutter, and before Sakura can say anything in reply, he is walking away.
She doesn't come after him.
While he finds most children's shows obnoxious and immature, he can't bring himself to change the channel.
The animation is neon bright and constantly changing – the kind of images that would induce seizures. The background alone is a huge health hazard. But Sasuke can't look away, and beside him, Naruto appears to share the same sentiments.
Hinata walks in, silent as usual, carrying a bowl of pretzels sticks. She glances at the two boys on her couch, then at the TV, and grimaces a bit. Not even the rare sight of Hinata making a face is enough to tear his attention away from the cartoon. This must be what it's like to be brainwashed, he thinks dully.
Joining them on the couch, Hinata sits next to Sasuke. Partly because his side is the most easily accessible, and partly because if she sits next to Naruto, she'll spend the whole afternoon blushing and stammering and eventually faint. She's smart enough not to risk that, at least.
"Should we get s-started on the project?" she asks, her voice hardly carrying over the noise from the TV.
"Uh?" Naruto replies absently, turning his head towards her a bit, but his eyes not leaving the screen.
Hinata, seeing the only option left, picks up the remote and turns off the television. As if waking up from a dream, Naruto and Sasuke both blink, slowly, and then squint, as if coming back to the real world is blinding.
Hinata presents them each with a project sheet, listing all the materials they'll need, and the requirements for their presentation, and a scoring table. The two males examine it, Naruto taking considerably longer to read it, while Hinata waits patiently.
Naruto, having just recently learned that Sasuke and Sakura were dating, had been too miserable to even be around Sakura without sniffling or giving her huge, watery puppy dog eyes. So Sasuke, being a good friend (and maybe feeling a little guilty for dating Naruto's number one crush) took it upon himself to acquire them a new female partner for the science project, while Sakura chose to work alone. Because when Naruto got over the dejection phase, he would move on to fury, and Sasuke would be his target. Sasuke was rather selfishly hoping for Hinata to serve as a buffer between them, a role usually assigned to Sakura – though she obviously favored Sasuke in such cases. It is fitting that in the event of an argument now, Hinata's affection for Naruto would lead her to favor him instead.
Sasuke and Hinata work remarkably well together – comparatively, anyway, as Sasuke's looks and attitude make it near impossible for him to work with anyone else. Girls tend to stare at him the whole time, enraptured, while boys feel too threatened to contribute much. Not that any of his male classmates would really want to work with him. He is an asshole. Naruto is his best friend, the only boy who can really stand him, and they fight constantly. Huh.
Of course, when Sasuke suggested Hinata, Naruto agreed. Even though he views her as a weird, shy girl, he genuinely admires and likes her as a friend. Now if only that would translate to romantic feelings…they would all be set. Naruto would be with Hinata, and Sasuke would be with Sakura, and the whole world would be just fucking perfect.
Sometimes, Sasuke hopes that Naruto never develops feelings for Hinata. Not out of spite for either of them, but because that will indefinitely leave him with Sakura. It is common knowledge that the only thing standing in the way of Haruno Sakura obtaining Uchiha Sasuke is a certain blonde boy. Everyone says so, so it must be true. If Naruto were removed, Sakura would have no obstacles.
It's a pity, because Naruto and Hinata might make a good couple.
"Well, let's get started!" Naruto says, pumping his fist in the air, finally done reading the project sheet. His smile is forced, and his tone is even more forced…painfully so. Sasuke almost winces.
They work for a few hours, with many snack breaks; first brainstorming ideas, then narrowing them down to practical and plausible, and end up deciding to do a project on cloud formations. They then gather information about different types of clouds, save it all on a Word document, and agree to meet in three days at the library.
Hinata hardly stutters, deals with Naruto and Sasuke's arguments before they turn into fights, and is business-like and helpful. Sasuke is amused. When they leave, she'll probably drop to the ground under the weight of her suppressed finger-poking and blushing habits.
Sasuke and Naruto only live a block away from each other, so they walk home together.
Naruto, for once, is silent, and Sasuke is grateful but incredulous. He glances at him occasionally, but the blonde's face is blank and betrays nothing. Sasuke coughs. No reaction.
"So, I was making out with Sakura the other day," he begins, and dodges a swift punch to the face. Ah, there we go.
"Teme! Why the fuck didn't you tell me you were dating?" Naruto demands, fists clenched, gritting his teeth. Sasuke stands a semi-safe distance away to observe him. "Because I thought you'd react like this," he says calmly.
"Well I'm reacting like this anyway!" Naruto shouts.
Damn. He has a point.
Naruto's face softens a little, and his stance relaxes. "I love her, Sasuke. You know that. Why did you do it?" he asks quietly.
Sasuke is quite good at many things. Math, writing, football, basketball, science, soccer, technology, business, organization…hell, up until two years ago he even played the violin. (Not that he'd ever admit to something like that.) What he is not good at is dealing with people. Mainly emotions. He doesn't like them, he doesn't understand them, especially when they're coming from himself. He doesn't know how to deal with a frustrated Sakura. He doesn't know how to deal with a lovesick Hinata. And he definitely doesn't know how to deal with a heartbroken Naruto.
"I don't know," is all he can say. It's the truth. Sort of.
Naruto drops his fighting stance slowly, and his expression closes up. He's obviously still pissed – but that's the only discernable emotion now. He turns away bitterly. "Fine. I don't care." He begins walking away.
Sasuke doesn't follow.
First semester, freshman year, goes by incredibly slowly; almost at a crawl. The weather gradually turns colder, and everyone's mood gradually worsens. Then it's break, then school, then break, then finals, then summer.
And before he can blink, he's a sophomore. He's still on the football team, he's still dating Sakura, and he's still just another kid in some backwater little town.
He's invited to parties all the time – upperclassmen despise him less than the rest of his class. (And he can't blame them. Freshmen have everyone beat on the annoying meter, but this year's sophomores are particularly stupid.) He usually declines the invitation anyway, not wanting to spend a night with his intellectually inferior football teammates. On the off chance that he does go, it's at Naruto's insistence. Naruto, being compassionate and loyal and his best friend, has mostly forgiven him. Unluckily, he has traded Naruto's ire for Sakura's.
She's not really angry – she's never angry with him – she's just…aggravated. Pining for his attention. Longing to be treated as an actual girlfriend, not just someone he kisses on occasion. This is asking for a lot from him, and usually this would be enough to make him dump her. But he's intrigued that it's not because she's being ignored by her popular boyfriend, and wants to keep up appearances – she's upset because she truly likes him, and he has done nothing to show her the same. It's…sad. She's one of the few girls he can think of who don't just want him for his looks or his reputation, but because they genuinely care about him. And the majority of women on that list are his female relatives.
As previously stated, he's intrigued. But not flattered. Not touched. Sometimes he wishes he could say that her authentic love moves him, but it doesn't. He doesn't want her love. He never asked for it. He certainly doesn't love her back. The fact that she presumes he does, or can, is what irritates him. Why he brushes her off. Because he gets the feeling that even though she truly loves him, it's not the real him. She loves some fantasy in her head, some version of himself that she thinks he could be. She's trying to change him, to fit that ideal. That's what he doesn't like. That's what stops him from treating her like his girlfriend.
And yet he can't break up with her either, because there is no one else who would care for him if they knew what a douchebag he was. Sakura knows, and Sakura deals with it by imagining what he'll be like once she gets through to him. Hinata's out of the question. Even if he found her timidity appealing, it would be negated by the fact that she doesn't care about him, and probably never will. Sasuke may not find her girlfriend material, and he may mock her for being so spineless and quiet, but he has to respect her for recognizing that he is hopeless, worthless, and not paying him any more of her attention. She harbors no fantasy that she can mold him into a better person. She's realistic. It is perhaps her one redeeming quality.
Then there is Ino. Ino, who is also invited to parties. Ino, who dates freshmen and sophomores and juniors and the occasional senior. Ino, who keeps her distance out of respect for Sakura. Ino, who still has not given up on him.
Ino, who, as he leans against the wall, stands a foot away.
They do not say a word, and have not said anything since Ino walked over five minutes ago. They are both holding drinks – Ino has a Coke, Sasuke has a cup of water. Ino won't drink because she is well aware of the effects alcohol could have on her reputation and school career. Sasuke won't drink because he doesn't like the taste.
She turns to him. "Do you think I'm easy?"
He says nothing.
"Do you think I put out, Sasuke?"
"I don't know. Do you?" It's a callous remark, he knows. He just doesn't care.
Her expression conveys nothing. No anger, no regret, no unhappiness. Just cool observation. "I don't. I've never. I'm not stupid."
He's surprised, and yet he's not. He knows that Ino loves parties, loves to socialize. She likes to let loose. But he also knows that Ino would never let anything jeopardize her future. She is a confusing contradiction.
"I know what they say about me. I'm either a slut or tease, depending on who you ask." She shifts against the wall. "I'm neither. I've never had sex. That doesn't mean I'm adverse to it. I'm just – "
He cuts in. "Saving yourself. For me." It's more of a question, but he phrases it as a sarcastic statement.
"No." That surprises him too. Her tone is cool. "You wouldn't appreciate it."
It's not said with any malice. Just facts. Ino, despite her reputation of being vapid and flighty, is a very logical being.
"But I do like you," she continues. "And I still want you."
"But you don't want me to break up with Sakura."
Ino shrugs. "Frankly, I'm waiting for her to break up with you. She calls me at night and cries about you. It's almost enough to make me believe that you're really a terrible person."
He takes a drink of his water. "Aren't I?"
She shakes her head. "No. Not to me, at least. I know a terrible person when I see one. I remember you as a kid. You were kinda sweet. You were just like every other boy, but a lot cuter. You were nice." She sounds wistful.
She's confusing him. He's not sure if she is disgusted by the way he is now, or she believes that he's still that nice little kid. "People change."
A small smile flits across her face. "Not that much."
He remembers, and agrees. Ino is as she has always been – confident, driven, outspoken, a girl totally sure of who she was and what she was going to be. The Yamanaka family owned a successful chain of floral shops around the country. They were florists, they had always been florists, and they always would be. Ino was going to be a florist, probably a manager of a local store or a higher-up in the company. Up until now, he had never questioned that fact. It simply hadn't occurred to him that Ino would ever want to be something different.
He knows as soon as it pops into his head that it would be an odd question to ask, out of the blue – but it happened to be one of those times where the question in your head, the one you're thinking would be inappropriate to ask out loud, is the one that leaves your mouth. "Do you want to be a florist?"
She hums a little, bemused. "You want to know more about my life, Sasuke?" A lightly teasing tone, but he doesn't join in. He's already expressed too much interest by asking her about her future. Hearing no reply from him, she says, "I never really thought about it. I like working in the shop, sure. I like managing the money, helping people out with arrangements." She stares out at the people in the living room dancing like idiots. He wonders if she's searching for her boyfriend. He can't recall if she currently has one. Her tone is softer now. "What else is there to be?"
It hits him, right then and there, what makes Ino different than Sakura. Ino has a level of depth that Sakura could never have – not until she has the kind of family that expects her to follow them without question. Not until she is driven to please them by sacrificing her own dreams. Not until her whole life is designated by her parents. Not until her life is dictated by goals and goals and more goals.
Sasuke remembers their assignment from sixth grade. Goal: To obtain a boyfriend. He wonders now if Ino truly likes him, or if she just wants him like she wants to be class president. If she's just like all the other girls, but not quite.
This time, it's an intentional question. "You say you like me. Why? What do you like, Yamanaka?"
She understands that he doesn't want to hear 'your looks' or 'you're so cool and deep'. Ino takes a minute to think about it. "You're smart," she says. "You're honest." Shrug, careless but graceful. "What more is there?"
"My personality," he retorts.
This time, she laughs. "Fuck that, no one likes your personality. You're such an asshole." Laughing again, then taking a sip of her Coke.
"Then what? What is it, beyond looks or money or whatever the hell the other girls like?" Well, now it's out there. Now she knows he thinks of her differently than them. Damn it, he hates building people up.
Ino thinks about it again, but has less success this time. She bites her lip, glances down into her drink, which is mostly flat by now. "I don't know," she says softly. "I just like you." She tries again, but still comes up with nothing, and gives up, glancing over at him beseechingly. "Can't I just cop out this once and go with 'your face'?" she pleads, half-joking.
He half-smiles, can't help it. And he realizes that he has Ino all wrong. He pre-judged her, and pegged her as a vapid, bossy, overconfident tween who was going to go out into the world and find out that it wasn't all made for her. If she's not really like that, that's the aura she gives off as a first impression. If he knew her, really knew her, he could probably understand why someone as generally nice and conservative as Sakura would be best friends with her. They're similar in many ways, but different in many others. So why, if Sakura is nicer and has more valid reasons for liking him, is he more intrigued by Ino? She is just one of many confident, attractive blondes. And sure, they have some things in common, but what does that really matter?
"So," says Ino, breaking his train of thought. "let's say you're my boyfriend." Without giving him a chance to even raise an eyebrow, she continues. "We're at that point in our relationship – at about, oh, four weeks – where you want more, physically. We've kissed, but it hasn't been anything too serious. You bring it up, and expect that I'll maybe blush and dodge the question for a while – you know, play coy. But eventually I'll agree. And you expect this based on my looks and what you've seen from me so far. You know that I like to have a good time. You know that I don't mind fooling around a bit. But what would you think if I said no?"
Sasuke looks at her, half-amused, half-incredulous. She rolls her eyes. "Just play along," she says. "And answer honestly."
He figures there must be some point to this, and relents. He looks up at the ceiling, frowns. "I'd think…you weren't who I thought you were."
"Would you be angry?"
"Not angry."
"Disappointed, maybe?"
"Sure."
"Would you break up with me?"
He again glances over at her, but she's staring straight ahead. "I don't know." It's the truth.
Ino nods. "See, about a week ago Kei and I had a little discussion about this. He wanted it, and I said no. He didn't understand. He thought he had me pretty figured out. I'm blonde, I'm popular. I must be easy. So when it turned out I wasn't, he ended it." Now she sounds irritated. "Went to find some other skank to swap STDs with."
"Dick move," Sasuke comments mildly.
"Yeah. So now I'm asking you, what would you do? Assuming you really want it. Let's say you see it as a necessary part of the relationship. So what do you do: break up with me because it's too much work, or try to get me to change my mind?"
He has to think about this. It's not an easy question, because this Kei guy obviously has very clear motives. Motives that Sasuke wouldn't normally be influenced by. So now that he's been put in a situation he would never get himself into in the first place, how can he respond? Should he pretend to be this Kei guy, or himself?
"If it wasn't an option for us not to have sex, if I just had to have it…it would probably be easier to break up with you." He admits, and Ino takes this in stride, waiting for the rest of his explanation. "You're stubborn, Yamanaka. I doubt I'd ever get you to change your mind. Honestly it's a waste of my time to even try. You said it yourself, you don't put out. I can't change that. I can't really change you."
To his surprise, Ino breaks out in a satisfied smile. "That's it," she says smugly. She takes another sip of her flat drink, not bothering to grimace at the taste anymore. He's thoroughly confused. He gave an honest answer, and frankly it was a cruel and ill-mannered one. He expected to be hit, to be admonished harshly, or maybe even to have drink thrown in his face like in the movies. But instead Ino seems happy with his response.
"What's it?" he asks, trying not to sound as bewildered as he feels.
"That's it." She beams. "That's what I like about you."
He quirks an eyebrow. "That I'm too lazy to try to change you?"
"That you don't want to. That you…know you can't. You know me. You know you can't change me. It doesn't bother you." She's looking very satisfied now, and smiles up at him proudly.
He doesn't really know what to say, so he says, "Plenty of guys wouldn't bother. Like the Nara," he adds, referring to her perpetually sleepy and unmotivated childhood friend.
Ino shakes her head. "No, it's more than that. It's not because you're lazy. It's because you know what I'm like. Doesn't matter to you. You're not looking for some kind of perfect forever love, you're not even looking for love. I don't have to be good for you. Because you're not good. You're just…you, and you can be an asshole and a jerk and an uppity snob and I can be one too."
He takes a moment to absorb this. "You like me because…I give you an excuse to be a terrible person?"
"No…well, maybe a little. But I like you because you're genuine. You're genuine, and you're honest, and you're…I don't know…Sasuke. You're Sasuke."
"That I am," he says distantly, automatically. This is arguably the oddest confession he's ever been given. It's not really romantic…or positive in general. It's definitely not passionate in any way.
But it's quite possibly the best.
"You know what?" she says.
"Hn."
She pushes herself off the wall and steps closer to him. A little too far in to his personal space, but his own back is against the wall, so there's really nothing for him to do but stay where he is, is there?
"I really want to kiss you," she admits. No explanation, no elaboration, she just leans close to his face.
And Ino is beautiful. Big blue eyes, perfectly straight nose with the slightest upturn at the end, and lips that really, now that he thinks about it, would not be totally disgusting to put on his own mouth.
But she stops there, searching his eyes, those lips curving slightly, an expression so calm and content he wouldn't have known it was Ino if he wasn't smelling flowers right now. "We could be good," she says, somewhat to herself. He finds himself agreeing, nodding the slightest bit, without even thinking about it. They could. They wouldn't be great. They wouldn't be perfect. But they wouldn't have to be.
And then she twists her lips. "Damn it," she murmurs. "No wonder everyone thinks I'm a whore. I'm trying to seduce you away from Sakura, right after I said I wouldn't."
She backs away, and he remembers his girlfriend. And feels like a major son of a bitch.
"Sorry," she says, sounding only semi-apologetic. She runs a hand across her flawless shiny ponytail. "I suck."
"It's fine," he hears himself say.
She smiles happily. "On the bright side," she says. "All my work has finally paid off."
"What?"
She nudges him. "You like me."
He looks away, exuding an air of bored indifference. "Che."
She isn't fazed. "You do. You like me."
He shrugs. He doesn't like her, she's just attractive. And more intelligent than he gave her credit for. More genuine. Maybe he likes her. Sort of, not that much. After all, she is still Yamanaka Ino – bossy, controlling, materialistic, girly, snobbish, and too confident for her own good. He doesn't like her that much.
"You like me," she repeats. She looks like the cat that caught the canary – although Sasuke finds that comparing himself to a small yellow bird is not all that flattering. Ino steps away, places her still-unfinished drink on a nearby table. She turns to him again, and says matter-of-factly, "It's 11:00 on a school night, so I'm leaving. I'll see you tomorrow." She pauses, then says, more quietly. "I want you. But I want Sakura to be happy. Right now, you're not making her happy. So…call her. And fix it. Or…something." She looks conflicted. "Do something."
Oh hell no – he's not letting her leave with that line hanging over him. "Like what," he asks flatly. "What should I do."
"I don't know," she says, already backing away. "Do what you want." She turns and disappears into the crowd.
Damn it…that's not an answer. And it won't work. What he wants is to be left alone. He wants simplicity. He wants freedom. He definitely doesn't want Ino.
He's 82% sure he doesn't want Ino.
Me: Okay, this was pretty much just me getting a feel for SasuIno. Part 2 will come out someday…
I'm finding that I really like Ino. She's like, so comfortable in her own skin. She's so unbothered by all this ninja shit going on around her – everyone else is like 'omg we have to save the world' and she's just like 'how's ma hair look?'. She's bossy and a little shallow, but she's so unapologetic about it.
It's decided. Ino is my second favorite female character.
Review, y'all!