Disclaimer: To own them, I would have to be CLAMP, and to properly imagine myself as CLAMP, I would need split personalities, so it's probably better that they aren't mine.

Warnings: Yaoi, Doumeki/Watanuki

Author's Notes: I'm not sure if my muse was reacting to what would have been finals week for me if I were still a student, or if she was just set off by the recent lack of interesting jobs from my supervisor, but she's been very active lately. Unfortunately, this is the only thing I've convinced her to help me finish so far.

Noise

By Rapunzel

The phone was ringing.

Watanuki seemed almost surprised by the sound, as if the idea that anyone would actually try to call him was a foreign one. After a moment, however, he recollected himself and went to answer it.

"Moshi moshi." There was a pause. "Ah, of course, Yamada-san."

Doumeki, who was sitting by the window working on homework, looked up in curiosity. He had no idea who this Yamada-san was.

Over at the phone, Watanuki was still talking. "Yes?" There was a pause. "Oh." There was another, longer pause, during which Watanuki's face began to turn very red. "Oh... I see. I'll make sure it doesn't happen again. Yes. No, no! No need to do that, none at all! Yes. Goodbye."

Doumeki sat listening to all of this, wondering what on earth they were talking about that could produce such a spectacular blush in Watanuki. He didn't have to wait long to find out.

"Doumeki!" Watanuki yelled the minute he'd placed the phone back on the receiver. "You jerk! I'm never letting you stay over again!"

Doumeki merely raised an eyebrow at this irrational and seemingly random statement.

"That was one of my neighbors!" Watanuki continued to shout. "She was calling to complain about all the noise last night!"

Doumeki's practiced blank look slide ever so subtly into a satisfied smirk. As small as the change in expression was, however, Watanuki instantly detected it, and it only seemed to make him even more infuriated.

"You think this is funny?! She says she was almost ready to call the police because she thought someone might be being murdered!"

"Why didn't she just knock on the door and ask us to keep it down?" Doumeki asked.

"She says she tried and no one answered!"

Doumeki's look turned slightly thoughtful. He didn't remember hearing anyone knock on the door the previous night, but then he had been otherwise occupied. Still, it didn't speak well for him that he had been so completely oblivious to his surroundings. He would have to be more careful about that in future.

"This is all you fault!" Watanuki continued to rail.

That struck Doumeki as mildly unfair, considering who had been making most of that noise. "Oi," he said.

"What?" Watanuki snapped. "Have you forgotten that my name is not 'Oi' again? Are you trying to say that it's not your fault?"

Doumeki shrugged. "I can't help it that you're as loud during sex as you are the rest of the time."

A crimson patch slowly formed on Watanuki's neck and began to make its way up his face. "You... you..." he sputtered, seeming at a loss for words.

"I'm only surprised that none of your neighbors have complained before now," Doumeki went on.

"AND WHOSE FAULT WAS IT IF I WAS MAKING NOISE?!"

Doumeki didn't answer, but the smug look returned.

"Wipe that smirk off your face! This is humiliating! My neighbors are going to think that I'm some kind of psychotic sex maniac!"

Doumeki shrugged again. "One more reason why you should come live with me."

"One more reason why I shouldn't live with you, you mean!" Watanuki sputtered. Doumeki had thought that it was impossible for his face to turn any redder than it already was, but Watanuki was proving him wrong. "It'd just give you more opportunities to corrupt me!"

Doumeki didn't comment, although he was thinking that Watanuki didn't seem to mind being "corrupted" nearly as much as he pretended he did.

"Besides," Watanuki continued in a more subdued voice, "I'd rather disturb my neighbors than your parents."

Doumeki, sensing that this was a more major reason than the ones Watanuki had already mentioned, hastened to point out, "You know, my room is pretty far away from my parents, so we wouldn't be disturbing them."

"Who said I'd be sleeping in your room? Stop jumping to conclusions, you arrogant jerk!"

"Besides, I'm sure my parents will love you enough that they wouldn't care anyway," Doumeki went on as though he hadn't heard Watanuki's outburst.

Watanuki looked away, fixing his gaze on the floor, his cheeks still faintly pink. "I'll think about it," he finally said.

Since he very carefully was not looking at Doumeki, he missed the smug, triumphant smile that crossed his face. "I'll think about it" was certainly better than the response he had gotten the first time he had brought up the idea, which had involved much yelling and flailing in the style only Watanuki could master. It looked like all his time spent over at Watanuki's apartment was having an affect after all, albeit not one he would have foreseen.

Doumeki couldn't really bring himself to be sorry about causing such a disturbance, however, especially not now. After all, he figured, all it would take to finish convincing Watanuki to move in with him would be a few more loud nights followed by more embarrassing phone calls from irate neighbors. These were things he was sure he could manage to make happen.

With that thought in mind, he set aside his homework and got up, advancing on Watanuki.

Watanuki observed this approach warily. "Doumeki, why are you looking at me like that? Doumeki? Hey, what are you doing? Doumeki!"

The smirk never left Doumeki's face as he pounced on his prey. Convincing had never been easier.

Owari