Full Summary: Inuyasha Takahashi, a twenty-five year old half dog-demon who pretends to be deaf and dumb, has spent the last eight years of his life as a patient of Tokyo Psychiatric Ward; a place where the orderlies are bullies, the medicine makes you sick, and the head nurse strikes fear into everyone's hearts. One day a rough and rowdy new patient, a self-proclaimed criminal by the name of Kouga Ookami, bursts into the ward like a breath of fresh air and engages in a head on collision with the staff. He stirs up the ward by gambling, sneaking in alcohol and women, and encouraging the patients to join his open rebellion against the feared Nurse Kikyo. In the all-out war that occurs between himself and the head nurse, Kouga turns the ward and Inuyasha's life upside down. InuyashaXKouga. Yaoi. Rated M for violence, strong language, and lemons.
A.N.: When I decided that I was going to start writing fanfiction again, I hadn't planned on tackling a non-traditional Inu couple. I always felt that Inuyasha should be with Kagome, Miroku with Sango, and etc. However, I couldn't stop thinking of a yaoi based on one of my favorite novels One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey. So I started writing and here it is! I'm not sure how big the fan base is for InuyashaXKouga fics are, but we'll see how it turns out I suppose.
Disclaimer: InuYasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest belongs to Ken Kesey.
Chapter One
"…one flew east, one flew west, one flew over the cuckoo's nest."
Today is THURSDAY
The season is FALL.
The weather is RAINY.
Thirty-seven days. For thirty-seven days the marker board stuck up by the nurse's station had said that it was Thursday. Time had stopped again in the ward, this time for thirty-seven days- a new record. I was the only one who paid any attention to the sign. The Acutes were young like I was and didn't care about the day or the weather. They were too busy playing cards and betting on matches and talking about all the women they wished they were fucking. The sign was really meant for me and the other Chronics who were supposed to be too crazy and dumb to keep up with what day it was. They were too far gone though to read or care about anything other than the thoughts and hallucinations that distracted them from doing everyday activities like talking and shitting. I was still shitting by myself, and I liked the sign. I liked knowing how long time had stopped.
It worried me that it had been Thursday for so long even more than it worried me that it had been raining for so long. It had already been raining for thirty-seven days, and all it needed to do was rain for three more and the whole world would be flooded over. Yeah, God probably got pissed off again because everyone was fucking too much and fighting too much so he told some poor jackass who had been behaving pretty good to build a boat and find two of every animal but forget about all the children because they just grew up to be whores and assholes.
Rain could be good though. After having a bad day mom used to look out the window at the rain drops racing each other down the glass and smile at me and say, "Rain will wash away everything if you let it, Inuyasha." It'd be nice if rain would wash away this hell hole right off the face of the Earth, but God himself probably couldn't crack the foundation under the ward. Rain didn't worry me one bit, but Thursday, though… Thursday was a bad day to be stuck in.
"Where's that great big Hanyou when you need him?"
It was the orderly named Hiten. Him and his shark-headed brother, the other orderly on the floor, usually walked around sulking and hating everything-the place they're at, the job they're doing, the people they got to work around. When they're hating like that it's better that they don't see me. I kept my eyes downward and tried to sneak off to hide in the mop closet.
I didn't like to admit it, but I was afraid of them. I wouldn't have been afraid of them before I came here. I wasn't afraid of anything in those days, or at least I didn't think that I was. When you come here you better be afraid. If you ain't afraid and you try to act tough and cross them the wrong way, they'll grin and get out that big jar of Vaseline so that they can shove a thermometer up your ass just because they think it's funny. "That went in pretty easy this time," they'll say. "What have you been up to in here? You that horny, puppy dog?" And if you struggle or yell or throw a fit, one of them might run off and get the Big Nurse which is even worse.
So I try not to look up as I creep along the wall quiet as dust in my white canvas shoes, but they have special sensitive equipment that detects my fear and Hiten looks up, his eyes glistening like red Christmas tree bulbs.
"Here's that old hound dog-the great big Hanyou. Here you go, puppy dog."
He sticks a mop in my hand and points to the spot that he wants me to clean today. I suppress a glare as I make my way over there, nevertheless relieved that he wasn't trying to clip my claws or inject me with some new drug that they would only test on a deaf and dumb patient with no family.
Hiten grinned and shook his head. "Would you look at that? Big enough to eat apples off my head and he minds me like a baby." He laughs.
I slopped the soggy mop strings back and forth against the white tiles as I pretended not to hear him. I was clever and cagey enough to be able to fake being deaf and dumb for so long. When they thought that you couldn't hear them or talk to them, they didn't expect as much out of you and left you alone for the most part.
"What's goin' on in here? I could hear you laughing all the way from the shower room with my ear plugs in."
It was his shark-headed brother, Manten, who had walked away from some other duty to join in on Hiten's fun. He had probably left some brittle old Chronic in the shower to fend for himself. In all honesty, the old bastard was probably better off falling than having his papery skin ripped off by Manten's merciless scrubbing.
"Just messin' with Mr. Puppy Dog over there."
Manten laughed, and made a comment about my ears. Hiten laughed, and then the two of them started mumbling back and forth and nudging each other over the new nursing assistant's tits.
That's when I heard it. I was mopping by the ward door when I heard a key enter the lock on the other side. I could tell that it was her by the softness of the lock work as it turned; as if the person with the key was someone who was used to manipulating locks. The door opened and a gush of cold air cut through me to the bone and brought goose bumps to my skin. I quickly ducked my head down, pressed myself against the wall and pulled the mop handle close to me. The nurse nodded at me as she walked by and let the heavy, iron ward door seal behind her with an echoing thud. I returned her nod without making eye contact.
She was heading toward the nurse's station where she would sit behind the sliding Plexiglas window all day and take notes about what she saw us doing. She stops in her tracks when she sights Hiten and Mantan huddled up together mumbling. They didn't hear her at first, but finally they must have sensed her glaring at them, and the shark-headed one turned around. By then it was too late.
She was damn furious. Maybe it was finally going to be the day that she ripped the bastards from limb to limb. They should have known better than to have slacked on the job when she was due on the ward. This wasn't going to end well, and the only one there to witness it was a Hanyou who couldn't talk to call for help.
The faces of the brothers contorted in shock and confusion as she grew to eight feet in height, curving her spine before her head burst through the ceiling. With every heaving breath, her body puffed up bigger and bigger until she was so large that her small, white uniform began to rip down the seams, exposing the red hot metal surface beneath. Her arms elongated and twisted toward the frightened orderlies who were hugging each other in the corner of the room. I knew that they were goners, but just as she had began wrapping those twisted arms around the brothers, the old Chronic Totosai staggered into the rec room.
"I'm tired! I'M TIRED!"
Before I even had time to look from the tired old man and back to the scene, the Big Nurse had already changed back to her regular self. Now it just looked as if she was gently chastising them.
"You two ought to be more responsible. For one, I have it on my schedule that you should be disinfecting the shower room, Manten."
"Yes, Nurse Kikyo…"
"And Hiten, you should already have the patients up and ready to take their medication. It is Monday morning, boys. You both know the Monday routine, don't you?"
"Yes, Nurse Kikyo…"
"Good…" She made her way past them and to the nurse's station, but before she took her seat behind the sliding window, she turned to Hiten and snapped, "..and would you please update the info board? A new patient is being admitted tomorrow."
"Yes, Nurse Kikyo…"
And because the nurse said so, it was no longer Thursday.
A.N.: When reading this fanfiction, it is important to remember that Inuyasha is supposed to be somewhat mentally insane. Many of the scenes that he describes are what he sees, not necessarily what is happening in reality.