A lot.
Disclaimer: Urablur equal slash equal Pokemon. To put that into perspective, Urablur doesn't own pokemon. Durr.
One fine day, Haruko Akira Britney Kazuki Heichi HARUHI Marissa Del Adiro, Also known as Haruko, woke up. It was a great, shiny, day, and she got out of bed and flipped her shiny, naturally pink hair. From the hair, fell babies and world peace. That's how beautiful her hair was.
Haruko was happy. Today was when she would get her Pokemon. She got dressed, putting on a black shirt and a skirt. The skirt somehow fit perfectly, and the black shirt was made out of the finest silk in the world. Even though that's not saying much when you talk about Pokemon. I mean seriously. Kanto. Johto. Hoenn. Orre, Sinnoh, and that other place. Freaking small.
Anyway, she skipped happily downstairs, where her abusive slave driver parents and mean big sister were waiting.
"OMG LIEK DID U BRUSH UR HAIR TODAI I TINK IT LUK UGLY OMG LYK GO EET UR BREKFAST N Y CANT U BE MOAR LYK UR SEEESTAR?" Whined her Mom.
"Hey. Margeret. Make me a sammich, will ya?" Her Dad said.
"NO U GET IT URSELF" Her mom shot back.
"Don't test me, woman!"
Ignoring her feisty elders, Haruko skipped over to the table, where she somehow whipped up a 3 course, continential breakfast out of nothing. Her mean big sister, Janet, gasped.
"I are so popular! You should make me breakfast!"
Ignoring her, Haruko ate the whole dish without being bloated or gaining ANY wait. Then she skipped over to Professor...Bob. Yeah. Bob.
"Hello, my precious," Bob said, kissing her on the cheek and fondling her although he should've been arrested for pedophile charges way back in Kanto, but he jumped ship into Sinnoh. "Waiting for your Pokemon?"
"Yes sir," Haruko said. When she talked, babies were concieved.
"Well, I got something special for you," Bob said. "Your very own...Umbreon!"
"OMGOMOGMOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMOGMOGMGOMGOMG" Cried Haruko. She hugged, or in this case with little fangirls, huggled the Umbreon. "Squee! I'MMA NAME YOU SHADOW!"
So Shadow and Haruko embarked on a magical journey, in which they defeated many cheerleaders, oh, my bad, Gymleaders, and won the elite four, etc. etc. etc.
And then, she went to Battle Island.
She was awesome there, cause Battle Island was explicitly limited to really awesome trainers, like herself.
So she advanced to the championships. Where she battled this guy named, uh, Nick. Yeah. He had like, 546590546590905466469054 uber pokemon, and sweeped Haruko's awesome pokeset that had Shadow, a Lucario, a Mew, a Celibi, a Darkrai (lol fanfiction hax), and a FOURCHAN.
Haruko fell into a depression. She got angsty. And then her Pokemon got old and died. Except for FOURCHAN.
Haruko got ugly. Her pink hair grayed and instead of babies and world peace, old prune pies and poo flew out. Her voice got raspy, and it killed babies. Her skirt and shirt, were wrinkled and smelled faintly of applesauce.
Horrified, Haruko got emo angsty, and died.
And the moral of this story? Well, first, if you're bored, don't write a crappy story like this.
But.
If you're just ready to drop your perfect character idea, wait.
And think about it.
This public service announcement was brought to you by the Coalition for Less Mary Sue Retards.