We Are Us I Am You, You Are Me
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from this series or any referenced ones. If I did none of the boys would very be seen again.
(A/N: okay so this fits in after the fight in frostbite but rose is a bit more broken up then in the book. Also I'm afraid I can't write lemons as well as others so I won't make a fool of myself trying. If anyone would like to write an ending that would be cool.
It wasn't fair! He shouldn't have died. I shouldn't have told him. I shouldn't have let my anger and jealousy override my sense. Now Mason's dead. And Eddie's scared for life. It's all my fault; I'll never see Mason again. And with that thought I began to sob. I didn't cry. I screamed. I screamed for one of my best friend's death. I screamed for Dimitri not wanting me. I screamed for my responsibilities. I screamed for my life. The one I didn't have.
I picked up the old lamp that came with my dorm and threw it at the wall. It shattered into billions of pieces, almost like my life. I punched the wall in my furry not even felling my bloody knuckles or seeing the hole that I had made. Immediately my door exploded open and Dimitri stormed through like my own personal god. I fell to the floor in a heap, too tired to fight but to far-gone not to cry. I curled up into the tightest ball I could manage and let out all of my fear. He just sat there, watching me. It figured that the hugest problem that I had would finally find me as soon as I had finally broken down. Dimitri reached out to me, almost as if to give me comfort, but he never had wanted me, not really. He had chosen Tasha, he was going to leave me and Lissa to be with her. Another round of sobs racked my body. It seemed like the frayed edges of my heart were never going to be sewn back together. " NO!" I sobbed. I wouldn't let him touch me. My heart couldn't suffer any more. My life was self-destructive. The only thing I could count on was myself. Even that seemed to be falling through lately with my Mason sightings. "Shh my Roza, don't cry, please." It almost seemed like he cared. I knew he didn't though. He couldn't. And neither could I. We weren't allowed. I opened my eyes only to see his reflecting my pain. I hated seeing that there. As frustrated as I was I couldn't bare to see him upset. "Dimitri" I whispered. "Oh Roza please don't be sad. Be thankful, be thankful that you could save them, and yourself." "Save them!" but I didn't. " I didn't save them, not Mason. I wasn't good enough. He died, it's all my fault. " " No my Roza, he was angry, he made the mistake-" " NO! I made the mistake! I cared about you! I was mad! (Stop yelling now) I was jealous. I told Mason. It's my fault" I curled back up into my little ball and continued crying. Why was he there? Why did he care? Why did he choose Tasha?
After a few minuets my cries died down a bit. It didn't seem like the tears would ever fully stop at this point. "Do I ever cross your mind?" I asked in a broken voice. So much for sounding stable. He turned towards me and it seemed as if he was staring into my soul. "No" he replied. I shrank back into the corner. " Do you want me?" "No" he replied just as curtly. "Would you cry if I left?' the same cruel answer "No". My voice was barely a whisper now. " Would you live for me I questioned. "? No' he answered in that unfeeling voice. "Would you do something for me?" I could hear him hesitate before "No, I wouldn't. I turned my head away, not willing to be broken again. "Choose, me or your life". When I said this I thought back to Tasha and her perfect self. Was my Dimitri going to be her life? Was she going to be his? His answer didn't even surprise me this time. "My life". All I could feel was the continuous searing the sucking of my heart, my will to live, destroying me. I was on a role. I couldn't stop. I was sick, and I was masochist, I had known that I would heart worse but I welcomed it. Anything but this. I heard him get up. Oh god, he was leaving. I took in a searing sigh, like what it sounds like when you have just stopped crying. I ha pushed them all away. Mason was dead. Adrian doesn't really love me, and now my mentor, my love; my other half was walking away. I was never whole. But I was never empty, not with the bond. But now everything was gone. Nothing could ever make me feel good again. I heard the bed strings strain. Why didn't he leave? I actually wanted him to leave. I felt his warm muscular hands on the back of my neck."Roza" I tuned over to where I could see him, without really looking. "Roza please". His voice was filled with so much. It hurt me that I could hurt him so badly. His hand came around o my torso. Why was he touching me? He picked me up as if it was effortless, and brought my limp body to his chest. I turned my head into his. He always smelt so good. As much as he had hurt my I still felt safer in his arms than on the ground. He stroked my forehead gently moving the loose strands of hair aside that had fallen into my face. I still got that electric spark from his touch. Nothing had changed since that first realization. We had both grown up, that's all. "Roza"he tried again. "The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind." He whispered. "The reason why I don't like you is because I love you. The reason why I don't want you is because I need you. The reason why I wouldn't cry if you let is because e would die if you left. The reason why I wouldn't' live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I wouldn't don something for o is because I need, to do everything for you. The reason why I choose my life is because you are my life, you are everything, I love you, I want you, I need you. I told Tasha no because I love you too much Rosemarie Hathaway, more than you could ever know." he explained. I felt my heart swell to so much more than ever thought was possible. I had never felt overwhelmed in this way except for that one night under Victor's spell. But that wasn't feeling like this, that was lust, this is love. I could feel everything, I could feel our love, and his hard body under mine acting as my rock, he was my comfort. I moved my arms to embrace him but was met instead with his mouth. The fiery hot passion that met mine. It was amazing that one kiss could bring so much. His lips were unbelievably soft in comparison to what you would expect from a hard trained guardian. I loved how perfectly we fit together. He was so experienced and even though I had kissed a lot of guys none of them were like this. I could feel his breathing become ragged as we lost ourselves. We had stepped over the boundary once again. The boundary of age, race, and duty. But, if he had always loved m then we had never actually gone back within that line since that first night, in his room. Oh, my gosh, that first time. As I felt his hands roaming over my body I let out a moan. I knew that he was remembering it too. I could feel it
Please review, no flames, this is my very first shot at writing and I want to know if I'm any good and should continue