Disclaimer: how many times do I have to say this: I do not own Rent, you idiot!

A/N: I should be working on 'Munkustrap's Bad Day'…or 'Shattered'…or even 'She's Leaving Home'…but instead I had a stupid, weird idea to write a multi-chapter RENTfic, so, here it is, poppets.

Angel Dumott-Schunard and Tom Collins peered around the corner. "Is the coast clear? No-one's looking?" whispered Angel. Collins nodded, grinning secretively. Silently they crept over-

"BOO!" Collins and Angel screamed.

"Aaaaaaahhhh!" their good friend Roger Davis toppled backwards off his bed, and all three heard a hollow thud as his Fender guitar went with him. Roger's blond head appeared as he got up and dusted himself off. "You two! That was not-"

"Funny?" Mark Cohen entered the room, just on cue. "Sorry, Rog, but anything that makes you scream like a girl is funny." He smirked at the guitarist, who merely rolled his eyes.

"Damn straight." Agreed Collins.

Roger rubbed his head where he had hit the floor. "God, you bastards. What was that about, anyways?"

Angel smiled. "We just wanted to scare you guys!" he said. "No, honestly: we're going to Santa Fe!"

"Really?" said Mark. "Well, have fun." Angel and Collins laughed.

"We're all going!" he added, "Maureen and Mimi and Joanne, too."

Roger rolled his eyes sarcastically. "God, Mark, you're such a retard. You should have known we're ALL going, dur."

The bespectacled blond looked confused. "What, am I the only one who didn't know about this?"

"No." said Roger. "What the hell is going on?"

"We're going on vacation to Santa Fe!" yelled Collins and Angel in unison.

"But-"

"No buts about it!" Collins shook his head. "Get packing, boys."

"Be back in a few, sweeties!" Angel called cheerfully as he and Collins headed out the door. Roger and Mark stood for a moment, their mouths hanging open, both with the identical 'what-are-they-doing' look on their faces. Then they turned to each other and shrugged.

"Tell me, why are we doing this, again?" said Maureen skeptically as the seven friends sat in the airport.

"Because," Angel explained patiently, "This family needs a good bonding experience."

"So?"

"Well…don't you think of a vacation as a bonding experience?"

"Ummm…" Maureen glanced over at Mark, Joanne, Mimi, and Roger, who were arguing heatedly over something. All she could make out were the curse words. "Um, sure, Angel. Just keep thinking that."

"I knew you'd agree with me!" Angel replied cheerfully as Collins walked over and sat down next to him. "You think this is a good idea, don't you? No-one's going to hate me after this?"

"Of course, baby!" Collins replied. Honestly, he had his doubts- it was hard not to after seeing Maureen and Joanne go at it on the way to the air port- but, naturally, he didn't tell his lover that.

"Oh, good!" said Angel, looking reassured, and gave Collins a quick kiss. A little girl standing nearby who was probably three or four, and did not know any better, turned to her mother and asked her, in a very sweet and innocent voice, if 'that was a girl or a boy' (pointing at Angel). The mother looked rather alarmed; the bohemians snickered.

"That is a…yucky…person." Replied the girl's mother, quite a bit too loudly. (Obviously she had never learned basic manners!) "repeat after me…transvestites are yucky!"

"Transvestites are yucky!" said the little girl obliviously.

"Hey!" exclaimed Mimi angrily. "Who are you calling 'yucky'?"

Collins put his arms around Angel, who was looking deeply hurt. "Yeah, are you insulting my favourite transvestite?"

"I think you're yucky!" Mark and Maureen chimed in simultaneously at the lady, who now looked rather scared, as though the East Villagers were going to eat her for dinner. (Of course, we never know...)

"Come on, let's go somewhere else." Said Joanne, glaring at the woman. "And if anybody else says something, I'll put my dearies to good use!" she beamed, tapping the sole of one of her Doc Martens.

Therefore, the 'yucky issue' (as it was nicknamed), the fuming group of fiends trooped off to find a different area. Suddenly Angel smiled. "Collins, can I ask you something?"

"…sure!"

" Darling, am I really your favourite transvestite?"

A/N: Sorry if this chapter was a bit short, and if it didn't include much detail…I usually write with a lot more detail, and more text in between dialogue, but I'll work on that next chapter. Updates may take a little while, because I don't have any of the other chapters written out. Now if you bothered to read it, you could at least do me the decency of reviewing…pweese? .:Jemima eyes:.

Le gra go deo,

Ep