Hi, so this is a translation of a story i wrote in spanish (my first language) for a contest in Fanfiction. I had never written something in english before or tried to translate, but i wanted to give it a try. If you see any mistakes, please let me know and ill try to correct them. Thank you and enjoy!

Chapter 1

''Kagome, help me!''

Generally, before a cry of help, most people would usually come to aid the person in need, or at the very least, feel alarmed enough to react in some way. It's the rules of social etiquette, especially when it comes to a partner.

However, Higurashi Kagome could not be bothered in the slightest. Without turning around, she exclaimed over shoulder:

''Inuyasha, leave Shippo alone!''

The comment was said in an attempt to end the fight between the two demons, which seemed to repeat itself night after night. It was never clear who was the one who started it, but being Shippo the little one, most of the times Kagome would put herself on his side. But that usually meant she would later have to deal with a very moody Inuyasha, who expected his girlfriend to side with him, no matter what stupid things he would say or do to Shippo.

They were constantly putting her in the middle of their stupid arguments, and at some point ''Mommy Kagome'' just can't take it anymore, especially if she doesn't want to die so young. So whenever she could, the girl would put as much distance between herself and the trouble as possible.

Unfortunately, this was rapidly proving not to be one of those occasions, since she was immediately answered by a half growl, half yell from Inuyasha:

''Why are you yelling at me for?! It was the shrimp who started it!''

''I'm not a shrimp, I'm a fox!''

''I don't care what you are as long as you get out of my way…shrimp''

There was a biting sound, and then immediately Inuyasha started screaming in frustration. Shippo had sank his teeth in the older demon's ankle (the only body part the little fox could see from the ground), and even though Inuyasha was moving his leg furiously in the air, Shippo was not letting go of his prey.

''Kagome!'', screamed Inuyasha once again ''Do you see what he is doing?!''

The girl was at the moment enjoying a very relaxing cup of tea, and could not see what was happening behind her back. Not that she was planning to anyway; she had had enough of the nonsense and wanted the fight to be over as soon as possible. So, after carefully sipping her drink, she answered with a very simple:

''Aja''

''Liar! You are not watching at all!''

Kagome sipped her tea once again and tried to block all sound that didn't include the soft breeze shaking the leaves from the trees over her head, or the nearby river flowing in the night. Relaxing and calming sounds.

Of course that was easier said than done. She could still hear frustrated growls that were soon enough going to get her a massive headache, and for the millionth time, she wondered why she hadn't packed a pair of headphones before settling down forever with a loud demon. Not that they would be useful in this time, but a girl could only dream.

''You know what? Have it your way'', said Inuyasha, ''Just don't come crying to me when the shrimp gets hurt''

''I told you I'm not a shrimp!''

With that, the fighting sounds become even louder, to the point that Kagome seriously considered getting in the middle and pulling both of their ears until they became red as tomatoes. She was done with immature brats!

''It's so late, why do they have so much energy?'', asked Sango, who was sitting with her head between her knees, ''Like this, no one is going to be able to sleep tonight''

''Well… we weren't really planning to sleep now anyways, right honey?'', asked Miroku with a wink.

Kagome saw the blush across her best friend's cheeks, and smiled to herself before she turned around so the couple could have some privacy.

She still couldn't believe those two had gotten married and had kids. She loved them, and rooted for the couple, however, she had to admit they didn't seem to have absolutely nothing in common, apart from the spectacular ability to hunt down and exterminate demons. But again, maybe that was enough to keep a marriage alive. What would she know?

Miroku had been a lady's man since the day he had crossed paths with Inuyasha's group. He had seduced every single woman who appeared before him, and Sango had not been an exception. Although the girl had shown she quite enjoyed his company, she still had resisted the idea of submitting to his charms. Unlike every other girl, Sango had seen through his act, and had been too smart to fall for his advances. She stated very clearly that she wasn't planning to mess around with a perverted monk, and she had rejected him on every opportunity.

For a long time, Kagome thought those two would circle around each other, fighting constantly and without having the guts to voice out loud what they truly felt. But at the end, their feelings had caught the best of them, and against all odds, they managed to build a bridge between their two very different worlds.

Now, years later, with no threat in the distance, it was clear that they were finally happy.

And to think that after all this time, she can still blush like this for him. She supposed that the scene before her, was the best example of what love can accomplish. Even with the responsibility to raise their kids, they still found time to be with each other and have private jokes.

Must be nice.

Kagome asked briefly to herself if her life with Inuyasha would turn out the same way after many years, but she wasn't so sure. It was only a few months ago that she had found the entrance to the feudal era once again, and had decided to live with Inuyasha for the rest of her life. She still missed her old life from time to time, her family, her friends, even her school in some level, and she supposed those feelings wouldn't vanish easily.

But everyday she felt it was a little easier to deal with, and she could honestly say she was happy right now. She had amazing friends, a job as a priestess in the village, and Inuyasha, who she loved with all her heart. To be able to be this happy, seemed like an illusion sometimes, but it wasn't the case at all. Kagome simply had it all.

Even though you are not satisfied…

Kagome sighted and rub her temples, trying to make the pain in her head go away. She would never admit it aloud, but sometimes, this little, tiny voice in her mind, appeared out of nowhere, and started talking about her most dark insecurities, and planting seeds of doubt in her brain. At all costs, she tried to avoid listening to it, and making herself understand that she had everything she could ever want or need to be happy, but to no avail.

The voice just wouldn't shut up.

Little by little, almost without noticing, she noticed she had started listening to what the voice was saying much more carefully, and to feel like something was missing in her life.

She couldn't explain it to anyone, not even to herself, what was this thing that she thought was missing, and so she never said it out loud. Thinking about it seemed bad enough at times, and she was sure that voicing her concerns to Inuyasha would only make the problem more serious than it actually was. If only she could find out, what was that thing she was missing to make her life perfect, she could go look for it herself, but she had no idea, and that was simply annoying.

Next to her, the young couple got on their feet, and started walking away. They didn't say a word, but judging by the blush on Sango's cheeks, and the grin on Miroku's mouth, Kagome could tell they were looking for complete privacy.

''I'm serious, Inuyasha, If you call me that one more time…!''

''What are you going to do, shrimp? Bump me with one of your little toys?'', answered Inuyasha with a mocking voice.

So far gone was Kagome in her own thoughts, that she had forgotten about the fight still going on behind her. But right now, alone in the forest with those two demons, she couldn't ignore the yelling enough to be able to sleep. And she couldn't just walk away through the same path the young couple had taken, so there was no point in delaying her participation. They were going to get an earful from her.

Stupid brats…

Kagome raised herself from the floor, and turn around so she could finally put an end to the fight. Nevertheless, out of nowhere, a bright light blinded her, and a cloud of smoke surrounded her completely. She started coughing right away, and she tried dissipating the smoke with her hand, but it soon proved useless.

''I'm going to find you, brat!'', yelled Inuyasha, somewhere inside the cloud of smoke.

''Inuyasha!'', yelled Kagome, trying to search for him, ''where…?''

Her question was cut off by a heavy body that crash into her with the strength of a train. Her breath left her lungs, and she fell to the ground, also managing to take down the body that had bumped into her. Kagome hit her head against the floor, and for a minute she felt disoriented.

''Shit, I'm sorry!'', said Inuyasha on top of her, ''are you okay?''.

Without being able to answer because of the lack of air, Kagome nodded, hoping Inuyasha could still see her even in the midst of the smoke, which was starting to dissipate. Somewhere in the forest, Shippo's laughter was heard before it disappeared in the distance, as if he were running away. It was the laugh of naughty kid who had gotten a prank just right, and the girl made a note in her mind to punish him when she saw him again.

From on top of her, Inuyasha growled threateningly, and seemed eager to look for the kid and carry out the punishment himself. But he controlled his urge to get revenge, in order to not leave Kagome lying literally breathless on the grass.

''Do you... have… any idea how…much you weigh?'', she asked between short breaths.

''Sorry, I didn't know you were there'', he answered truthfully.

Kagome glared at him, letting him know just how stupid she thought his answer was. There really was no need for words, since the frown and the flaming eyes said everything already. Most times, the girl could be sweet, but she had the personality of a flesh-eating demon when she got mad, and no one was exempt from her wrath. Especially not him.

Inuyasha moved lightly backwards, fearing the only word that would make him bow down to her. Literally speaking. He had fought countless demons in the past, some as powerful as Naraku or Seshomaru, both who had almost taken his life in the process. However, none of them scared the living shit out of him…as one ''sit'' from Kagome and his stupid necklace around his neck could. He trembled only thinking about it.

''When I…recover…my breath…'', she started to threaten.

Trying to delay his punishment as much as possible, Inuyasha looked for a way to distract her.

''Can I help you with that?'', he asked with a grin rapidly forming on his face.

Kagome had little time to analyze the demon's words, before he reached forward, and without a single warning, kiss her full on the lips. At one instant, she had been completely furious, searching in her brain for ways to make the demon pay for crashing her to the ground. One second later, her head seemed to have detached itself from the rest of her body.

Damn Inuyasha, she tough, but the words didn't carry much meaning, not even in her own mind, because she loved the feeling of his lips on top of hers. She knew she should have been even angrier at him for trying to distract her with kisses, and she even considered pushing him away. But on the contrary, she put her arms around his neck. Without realizing, she let a small moan escape from her lips.

Inuyasha smiled lightly at the sound coming from her lips. He liked knowing that he could weaken the girl, rob her from her senses, and make her forget why she was mad. It was like owning an off button, which only he possessed.

From their first kiss, Inuyasha had only tried to perfect the art of kissing, finally understanding why Miroku would turn into a dog searching for tail at the sight of a woman. The feeling was amazing! Having Kagome's body so close to his, her mouth moving in the same rhythm, and that hypnotic black hair beneath his fingers, was just too good to be true. And he wanted more.

Slowly, Inuyasha traced his hand down the girl's body. He caressed her neck and clavicle, before lowering it more, until it reached the hem of her yukata. The skin underneath so soft, it was just like silk. He was about to continue his exploration, when suddenly he felt Kagome's body tense as a string, and her lips stopped moving against his.

With a silent curse inside his mind, Inuyasha stepped away, and sat with his back to her, so she wouldn't see the reaction he had in the lower region of his body.

Kagome took a deep breath and sat down as well, noticing she was once again breathless but for an entire different reason. Her body had light up like a damn torch, and areas of her skin that she had never paid attention to, were now burning up. She felt uncomfortable with the reactions of her body, but nothing was worst than the certainty that she had rejected Inuyasha…again.

''Can I ask you something?'', he said.

When Kagome looked at his face, she noticed that he didn't' have any specific emotion in his eyes. He was just serious. With some fear about what his partner could ask, Kagome absentmindedly nodded, and waited for the boy to speak.

''Is it nervousness you feel… or am I doing something wrong?'', he asked, and she knew he was referring to her previous rejection.

The girl's cheeks became crimson, and she lowered her gaze to the ground. In a small, soft whisper, she answered:

''You are not doing anything wrong''.

Kagome immediately felt a wave of embarrassment wash over her, and she hoped the earth could open up and just swallow her whole. If there was something in the world that could make her more nervous than Inuyasha's advances, it was openly talking about it with someone. She knew it was a bit childish on her part, but saying those words out loud seemed to make the situation much more real, and definitely more intense, so Kagome simply avoided those conversations. However, it wasn't the nerves the main reason she had just rejected him.

Since Kagome's return to the feudal era, the couple had come closer than ever. They would laugh, joke, fight and kiss, just like any normal couple would. He though he was doing something wrong? On the contrary, his very touch on her skin was enough to make her go absolutely crazy. And yet despite her reaction…they had never made love.

Not that they hadn't had an occasion. Kagome knew that if it was solely Inuyasha's decision, it would probably have happened by now. Like any guy, he got turned on easily, and his physical response was very obvious when they were alone. The one who was still resisting, was her.

I bet Kikyo wouldn't be so hysterical about this, said the voice in her head, and Kagome repressed the need to curl her hands into fists and punch something. She hated comparing herself with Kikyo, she really did, but she couldn't help it when the other girl had loved him first, had belonged to him first. The former priestess had undoubtedly shared many experiences with the demon, and that was something Kagome couldn't erase, no matter how hard she tried. Even in death, the other women still seemed to have an advantage.

Kagome was sure of Inuyasha's love, and she didn't want to doubt the feeling, especially when she had left her whole life behind for him. But a part of her, a very tiny and scandalous part, couldn't stop wondering if Inuyasha was unconsciously searching for Kikyo…in her.

It was a depressing thought, but still it made sense, considering she was the reincarnation of the former priestess, and both women could be considered the same person.

Kagome had no idea how many where the similarities between both of them, but she feared the day when Inuyasha stopped looking for the differences, and finally got bored of her because he realized that his experiences with Kikyo weren't going to be the same with her. She had no doubt Inuyasha would be disappointed when they made love, because he wouldn't be able to revive those old feelings.

That's why you freeze every time he touches you.

She had been nervous about Kikyo's presence before, but never like this, never this strongly, as if she were anxious for Inuyasha to abandon her to go chase a dead dream. It was terrifying to even think about it.

''Then can I ask you what is it about?'', Inuyasha insisted, pulling her away from her thoughts, ''because everytime I come near you…''

Oh no, she most definitely didn't want to know how that sentence ended, nor she wanted to keep talking about this. But she knew Inuyasha was stubborn enough not to let the subject slide, and the knowledge left her with an increasing sense of panic inside her chest, which led her to act irrationally.

''I can't believe you would ask me something like that!'', she shouted out of the blue, and both were surprised at her outrage, ''It's none of your business''.

Instantly, Kagome wished she could take back those words, because they weren't fair at all. She had yelled out of embarrassment, and he didn't deserve to be talked down like that, as if he wasn't an important part of her life. But the humiliation she pictured in her mind if she gave away her real reason to freak out like that, completely beat the honesty inside her. So she stayed quiet.

Inuyasha, on the other hand, frowned, and turned around to face her. If there was something he hated most of all, it was being left out, even more when the discussion had something to do with him. He had always been a warrior facing his problems head on, and this was just another kind of battle.

''None of my business, you say? If I recall correctly, we are a couple, so any problem you may have with me, you need to say it to my face instead of keeping things from me, Kagome''.

''I'm not keeping anything from you, I just don't want to talk about it!''

The girl stood up and was ready to leave, with her cheeks burning as red as flames. Seeing this, Inuyasha quickly stood up as well, held her arm, and made her look at him in the eye.

''You never want to talk about this''.

That's right; you are always avoiding him, so he doesn't find out about your insecurities…

''No, you are just too insisting''.

It's a lie and you know it, indicated the voice inside her head, and Kagome wanted to scream. Of course she knew it! Inuyasha could be perseverant or intense, but he was always respectful of her wishes. If she ever told him there was something she didn't want to do, he would never push. She was lying to his face by saying he was ''too insisting'', and the guilt was starting to weight on her soul, but she had no choice. She couldn't possibly say that she was jealous of a dead woman…someone who he probably still missed.

''What is that supposed to mean?'', he asked angrily, ''are you saying I'm forcing you?''

Kikyo wouldn't have created this mess.

Kagome wanted to shut her ears to any sound, just like a little child would. She wanted that damn voice to shut up once and for all, but she knew better. That voice came from a place deep inside her, where all her fears hid under a thin veil, and there was no way to stop it from coming out.

''Is that what you are saying? Am I forcing you?''

Inside her mind, Kagome saw Inuyasha and Kikyo in a passionate embrace. She witnessed them sharing a romantic kiss. She imagined their night of passion… and desperately wanted to scream. With each image, a wave of rage started growing inside her chest, and the same voice pointed out that those were probably the best experiences in Inuyasha's life, and she couldn't compete with something so powerful as a first love. She wasn't even sure if sex with her would be better (or even good), because she didn't know a thing about it! And didn't that only made her even more damn nervous?

She would disappoint him. She was sure of it. And it was that stupid thought that made her open her mouth and yell the most poisonous lies that had ever come from her mouth:

''You are pressuring me!''

Inuyasha immediately straightened his back and looked at her in surprise…and pain, almost as if she had hit him in the face. Even though he had demanded an answer from her, he seemed betrayed now. Kagome could almost hear the little voice giggling in her mind, having planted way too many doubts, and now enjoying the results. Was it too late to go back?

''I…I never forced you to do anything you didn't want to'', he answered in his defense.

Instantly, Kagome felt terrible, because he was telling the truth, he had never touched her without her permission. She wanted to take back her statement, but she couldn't stop the snowball once she had pushed it down the mountain.

''No, but you are always trying to get into my pants, and making me feel bad when I reject you''.

That's not what I want to say, she though desperately.

''I never tried…''

''It's not fair that I have to put up with your…perversion'', she interrupted him, ''or is sex the most important thing in our relationship all of a sudden?''.

What am I saying?

Inuyasha frowned, and tried to speak. But Kagome felt suddenly so nervous that he could eventually find out the real reason behind her outbreak, so she panicked and yelled:

''What can't you understand? I don't want to sleep with you!''

She bit her lip to shut herself up, because she didn't know what the hell she was saying anymore. Between her brain and her mouth, there didn't seem to be any filter, and the more nervous she got, the more stupid stuff came out of her mouth. She ended up spitting out that big mistake.

Of course she wanted to sleep with him! But she was too scared to become a disappointment to him, and instead of speaking about her insecurities like a normal person…she had decided to blame him for everything. Oh, and calling him a pervert.

Nice idea, Kagome, she thought with sarcasm.

Truthfully, the girl was waiting for a confrontation. She generally didn't like to fight, be it Inuyasha or anyone else, but the frustration inside her seemed like a living thing, eating away inside her, and stressing her out, to the point that she couldn't think clearly anymore. She needed to get this problem off her back, get it out from inside her chest and finally feel better. She needed a fight, so she waited for Inuyasha to answer in the same aggressive way, so she could continue to vent her frustrations.

However, the demon didn't say a word, and the silence spread all over, until it became unbearable.

''You are not going to say anything?!'', she yelled suddenly.

Say something, she pleaded, anything.

Inuyasha raised his gaze from the ground, and the look he gave her was so full of sorrow, it almost shattered her soul to pieces. That was the man she loved most in the world, and she had hurt him, not with knives, not with knuckles…but with lies.

''Why would i?'', he asked after he shrugged, ''I don't want to pressure you anymore''.

And with those words, Inuyasha disappeared into the night, running away so fast, that even if she had had the energy to follow him, she would have lost all track. The girl cursed herself for being so stupid and fell to the ground on her knees. She covered her face with her hands and felt like the most pathetic being in the whole world.

How could she had been so cruel? In her effort to avoid Inuyasha finding out about her insecurities, she had ended up blowing up in his face and screaming she didn't want to be with him. And that was just a big fat lie, no matter how she looked at it. The fact that he had believed her, though, was heartbreaking, because it meant she had taken the situation too far without noticing.

Her eyes started to prickle, and Kagome hug herself in an attempt to keep together all the pieces of herself. They seemed to be falling apart.