Looking For Love
This really should have been posted a long time ago. -_-' My procrastination knows no bounds... Anyway, This was the end result of some thoughts and other such things I was dealing with awhile back. And I'm sure a friend will recognize a certain inside joke I used. =3
I think the quote belongs to me (but I won't swear to it). The twins are 17, juniors in high school, and sharing an apartment that their dad helps pay for. And that's all you need to know. Enjoy!
"When you go looking for something you never find it. But as soon as you stop looking, all the things you wanted to find show up in front of you."
Koichi sighed, flopping down the couch. He'd eaten a light snack, finished the last chapter of his book, and watched half a movie on TV since he'd gotten home, but still he couldn't shake the gloomy mood he was in. The reason? Simple: yet another relationship had gone down the drain.
The elder twin was known for his gentle and innocent disposition; and while this had labeled him one of the most adorable boys at school, it also meant that the not-so-innocent girls thought they could get away with manipulating him. It was true that gentle Koichi would put up with more than most people – living with his rather temperamental brother, he'd found that a more forgiving nature came in handy; often Koji didn't truly mean to be harsh, he just acted or reacted without really thinking – but even the sweetest person had their limits. And when Koichi snapped, god help the person who pushed that final button. You almost wouldn't believe he was the same person. Koji certainly wouldn't have believed it if he hadn't been on the receiving end of that venomous glare and harsh insults once, and only once.
Anyway, this was the reason for his latest failed relationship. Koichi had realized that his patience with Ami's pushiness was growing thin, and not wishing things to escalate into an overly dramatic fight, had ended it with a simple, "Sorry, but this really isn't working," and returned home much earlier than originally planned.
With a long sigh, Koichi sunk further into the overly plush couch. Who was it that had dubbed it 'the-couch-of-no-return'? It was either JP or Takuya, after Tommy had sunk in-between the cushions and had to be rescued because he couldn't get up.
Okay, now the elder of the twins was simply avoiding thinking about the day's events. And previous days before. Maybe it was time to step off the dating circuit for awhile. Lately, the girls he'd been dating were all similar to Ami – manipulative, pushy, and having ulterior motives behind their actions. The decent ones seemed like they were all either too shy, already taken, or not really interested. Maybe he was just meant to stay single.
…Well, that thought was rather depressing.
The door swung open and slammed shut, followed by incoherent angry muttering. Koichi perked only slightly at the fact that his brother was back because, by the sound of things, Koji's date hadn't gone too well either.
The younger twin strode into the room, still muttering, without noticing his brother curled up on the couch.
"Hey, Koji. Bad night?"
Koji blinked, ceasing his incoherent mutters, and turned to the elder. "Oh. Hey," he murmured absently, then sighed loudly, running a hand back over his bandana covered head. "Where to begin?" he asked rhetorically.
Koichi gave his brother a small, sympathetic smile that took some noticeable effort.
"Something happen?" Koji asked almost immediately, noting not only the effort it took to smile, but also the disheartened look in his twin's eyes.
The smile disappeared and Koichi's eyes flickered off to the side, a small 'hm' the only acknowledgement to the question.
"Ami?" Koji guessed, genuinely concerned.
Koichi sighed and succeed in sinking even further into the couch. "She was just like the others. I broke it off." His voice as small and quite but held the undertone of someone who'd been pushed close to the limit, signifying that while he may have been fed up with the girl's antics, he certainly hadn't liked having to end it. And of course he hadn't liked that Ami'd been just another girl trying to use him.
Koji would have lying if he'd said he hadn't seen the break up coming, even from the start. Most girls did seem to have ulterior motives for dating his all-too-kind-for-his-own-damn-good elder brother, but that didn't mean Koji hadn't been hoping he'd just been being paranoid again (he was pretty good at that after all). With another long sigh, he plopped down on the couch next to his brother, jolting Koichi out of the cubbyhole he'd made among the cushions.
"Why do girls have to be so complicated…?" the younger groaned, letting his head fall back against his twin's shoulder.
Koichi couldn't help but grin at the question. "More complicated than guys?"
Koji was bi and didn't particularly try to hide it either; he freely dated both guys and girls, though after every date with a person of his own sex, he would reaffirm his position of not wanting "to get involved in something so damn complicated."
The younger twin chewed on the question for a bit before responding. "Mentally and emotionally, guys do tend to be less complicated than girls. Now, start a relationship between two of them, and that's were things get sticky," Koji explained, eyes closed. "Have you ever heard the statistics? Breakups do not end well."
Koichi grinned faintly. "That why you've never gone out with the same guy twice?"
"Bingo."
Koichi grinned again, mischievously this time. "Except Takuya."
"That was not date," Koji snapped, but not harshly.
"Oh, right. It was an 'experiment'," Koichi corrected, making finger quote marks around the word.
Koji gave him a halfhearted but still very meaningful glare, and the elder chuckled lightly. "Alright, I'll stop teasing."
In truth, that incident had been a case of Takuya tripping over the soccer ball as Koji tried to steal it. The brunette had landed solidly on top of the younger twin, inadvertently kissing him in the process. Takuya went beat red, apologizing numerous times, but Koji, surprisingly, had made relatively light of the incident. That was probably his big indicator to the fact that he wasn't exactly "straight." Later, he'd cornered the brunette in the hall and repeated the previously unintentional action. According to a baffled and rather disturbed Takuya, Koji had stood there for a moment as if trying to decide something, before shrugging with a simple "okay," and calmly walking away. When confronted about it by his brother, the younger twin's response had been, "It didn't exactly feel right, but it didn't feel wrong either." A shrug. "I guess I'm bi. And, no, I don't like goggle-head."
Koichi smiled at the memory. It was so Koji to always get defensive. He stared at the younger, leaning against him with closed eyes, for a moment before slipping his arm around Koji's shoulders. Anyone who knew the twins would recognize this as a "let's pretend the rest of the world doesn't exist for an hour or two" gesture. And that's what the two did.
They picked a couple of their favorite movies, packed with humor, and laughed away their troubles for several hours. But once the TV and lights were off and the twins under the covers of the single bed in the apartment, Koji had time to think again. About the failed date earlier that night, about all the previous failed relationships.
Koji didn't like being single, but maybe it was time to stop looking and wait for love to find him.
…Or look in different place…
Koji had rolled over to face his twin and was slightly startled at how adorable Koichi looked at the moment. The elder twin wasn't asleep, he didn't fall asleep that fast, but anyone who hadn't known that would have believed that he was. Koji stared for a moment longer before deciding that it was worth a shot. Shifting closer to his twin, he gently kissed him.
Koichi's eyes fluttered open in surprise, a hand straying up to touch his lips.
Bad idea, Koji thought, shifting back to his side of the bed with an inaudible sigh and closing his eyes. Hopefully, Koichi would chalk it up to one of his whims, which it had half way been. But, unbeknownst to Koji, the elder smiled and snuggled a little closer to his twin.
"I guess before we started looking, we should have stopped to look at what was already in front of us first," he said softly, and then returned Koji's kiss with one of his own.
It was the younger's turn to react with surprise before a grin stretched across his face. "Yeah."
Nuzzling his nose against Koichi's, Koji wrapped his arms around his twin, pulling him closer than he'd ever done before. Koichi snuggled into his brother, both finding themselves content with how the night had ended. And then Koji realized that he'd probably just sentenced himself to a relationship way more complicated than any other homosexual relationship and groaned softly. But looking at his brother curled up against his chest, he couldn't help but get the feeling that it would all be worth it in the end.