You, Me, Him, Us, And All of the people

I'm an old soul. Been around for nearly fifty years, and by now, I've seen and heard nearly everything, to the point that nearly nothing surprises me. That's the oddity of life, I suppose. I've been rooted in one spot for so long now and, these days, I get the disheartened sense that the end is approaching; that these placid days will soon be over. And then I find myself wondering if anyone will even notice my death, even care that I'm no longer around. Truth be told, I'm nothing special, aside from my massive, rough figure and incredibly observant nature. But there are still probably plenty in the world just like me, also waiting for their end to arrive.

My home is on an often deserted hill, surrounded by grass as green and pure as possible. Down the hill is a light stream that runs down to an area unknown to me. Once in a while, a young and lively couple will park their picnic near me and lie down, staring up at the sky and watching the clouds shape-shift. Occasionally, they'll feed each other spoonfuls of whipped cream and strawberries, smiling as though everything's perfect and couldn't possibly get better. But these are the couples that I never see again.

These past few months, as summer ends and fall begins, a young boy has come nearly every single day. He's a nice looking fellow, with eyes as blue as the sky above, and a calm disposition that sets him apart from all the people I've ever seen. He always comes alone, wearing a light jacket and a solemn expression. If not for his eyes, I would consider him nearly as hollow as I am. But fortunately for him, his eyes are the window to his soul, often hinting at a bit of heartache or hope, sometimes even brushing gloom.

The pattern is always the same. He'll come and give me a quick glance before sitting down; a loud sigh escaping him and his cell phone gripped tightly in his hand. He'll pull his legs to his chest and wait for hours, his only company the occasional bird or bug that flies by. When the sun falls into dusk and he's still alone, he finally stands up and—with another sigh, a disappointed frown, and a long look goodbye—leaves.

I've realized that he's waiting. I'm not sure exactly for what, but as the weather grows colder and he continues to come anyway, I wonder why he's hurting himself like this. Every day he comes and leaves alone and broken-hearted, I find my hollow self temporarily growing a heart; a heart that can only break for this poor boy; over, and over again. And I can only hope that whoever and whatever he's waiting for comes soon, and saves him from this life of despair. No one should ever become as hollow as I am, for that would be the greatest shame of life.

**

Today, he comes again, despite the dark grayness of the sky, and the wet sense in the air that whispers that rain is coming. This time, he doesn't sit down, instead reaches one hand towards me, tenderly touching everything he can reach. It's the first time he's ever touched me, and even I notice how soft his hands are, a deep contrast against my prickly skin. His lips straighten into a firm line; blue eyes shutting tight.

For a long while, he stands still, allowing the wind to blow away everything; his thoughts, his problems, and the overwhelming wish for that person to come. And as fate will have it, I see him before the boy does. At the first sight of him, the one word that comes to mind is beautiful, with his brown eyes that are sparkled with flicks of emerald green. He has the most perfect, bow-shaped lips, ones that seem to cry to be touched. His hair is long and blond, wispy bangs falling into his eyes. And I'm nearly taken aback by the mere fact that so many emotions are radiating off of him, a sight that I've truly never witnessed before. His brown eyes first flicker with shock, and then the shock slowly morphs into happiness. His mouth opens, and he softly whispers.

"Noah…"

The boy whips around, his hand still on my skin. I don't have to see his face to know that his eyes are wide, and his mouth has dropped open. "Luke…" his voice breaks, but he ignores it, running to the boy named Luke and embracing him in a tight hug. "You came. You actually came…"

Luke breathes out through his mouth, his eyes watering and overflowing. "You-you waited for me…"

I see Noah squeeze Luke tighter; watch him bury his face into Luke's neck. "I told you I would…no matter how long it took, I'd wait for you…"

As they continue to embrace, the sky above clouds over until every spot of light is hidden. A few drops of rain immediately drop, glistening the grass below as though it'd just been christened. The two pull apart, and I watch Luke shyly look to the ground. "I'm sorry…"

Noah gently lifts Luke's chin up, until they're once again looking at each other. "For what, Luke?"

"For making you wait…" I watch as Luke gulps heavily and lightly touches Noah's cheek. "I'm so, so sorry."

Noah slowly shakes his head. "Don't be, Luke. You said that you couldn't trust me, and that I had to prove myself to you." He pauses and reaches down, taking Luke's hands into his own. "I came here every single day, waiting for you. Do you know that?"

Luke's mouth drops open and he looks down again. "Noah, I'm so, so—"

"—No, Luke. I mean…as usual I can't really get the right words out."

"Keep trying, Noah…please."

Noah takes a deep breath, and backtracks. "What I mean is…I know I hurt you. I lied to you about kissing you being a joke, I lied to Maddie about everything, and I even lied to myself. And you could see through everything that I did; everything I lied about." He pauses, inhaling deeply before exhaling. "I want you to know that I came here every single day, knowing that you wouldn't come just because I asked you to. I came here, and I sat here, and I waited. For you. And I don't regret doing it, because I was able to see so much…how much I was hurting everyone, especially you, and how much…" He pauses again, squeezes Luke's hands tightly. "How much it hurt when you weren't around. How much it hurt when I realized that you wouldn't come…"

Luke stares at him for a beat and then, as if suddenly realizing the weight of Noah's words, lifts himself up on the sole of his feet, his arms wrapping around Noah's neck. Their lips press against each other, and from my spot I can see everything so clearly. The way their lips form over each other and their bodies press together tightly, until it's impossible to discern when one body ends and the other begins.

The rain is starting to fall a little harder now, and it covers their faces with spots of water. They pull apart, and Noah's hands slide into Luke's shirt.

"Wait, Noah…"

Noah doesn't hear him, too caught up in kissing and biting Luke's ear. Frustrated, Luke pushes against Noah's chest, halting him in his movement. "Noah, what about Maddie? Does she know yet?"

At this, Noah gulps heavily and looks off into the distance. His silence is not the answer Luke was looking for, and his face quickly falls. "Noah…you still didn't tell her?"

"Luke, I want to, but—"

"—and your father. You didn't tell him either, did you. Did you tell anyone at all?\Luke's voice breaks with the question, and it's clear that he's breaking on the inside as well.

"Luke, I want to. God, I wanna scream it out to the entire freaking world, but…I'm not ready yet."

And with this, Luke's eyes widen with shock and he slowly pulls away from Noah's reach. He's shaking, and he whips his wet hair out of his eyes. "I'm sorry, Noah, but this was a bad idea. I shouldn't have come. It was hell for me to come out, Noah, and you know that. So I'm not going back in the closet. Not for anyone. Not even you…"

Noah's eyes widen now, and he takes a step forward. "Luke…?

"It'd really be better if we just moved on with our lives now. I mean, you want me to stay in this secret relationship crap, and I just can't do that." He pauses, trying evidently to control his unsteady voice. "We should just stop now and save ourselves from…from…" Luke's eyes overflow with water, and they rapidly fall down his face. At almost the exact moment, the rain becomes incredibly heavy; no longer a shower, but a downpour. His hands cross over his chest, and he bends over, as though something is eating at his insides.

Noah runs over to him, and pulls him into another tight embrace, pressing him tightly against his chest.

"Noah…" Luke chokes out. His hands grasp at Noah's shoulder. "I can't do it. I can't be the one to leave. I can't…"

Noah shakes his head, and it almost seems like he wants to cry too. "I don't want you to, Luke."

The rain is coating them over with water, seeping into the ground and through their clothes. But they ignore it, shivering in each other's arms. It's a moment until Luke speaks again, and he struggles to be heard over the rain.

"Noah, you have to leave first. If this goes on we'll just keep hurting each other and I can't do that. I wouldn't be able to stand it…"

Noah's mouth drops open again. He shakes his head, more fervently than before.

"You should just go now, so we can just end this and stop—"

Noah interrupts him this time, kissing him with all his might. And I watch as Luke quickly gives in, kissing Noah back and holding onto Noah's waist. Soon, they're grasping at every part of each other, and Noah shoves Luke against me. I feel my pricks touching soft skin.

Luke cries out, and Noah kisses him softly until the pain goes away. Briefly, he pulls away.

"Why did you come today?" He nearly shouts. "You never came before, so why today? Did you only come so you could tell me to fuck off?"

"Noah, that's not—"

"—that's the way it seems, Luke, okay? And to tell me to just forget you…it isn't that easy. I wouldn't be able to move on that easily. I mean…" He pauses and takes a heavy breath, water trickling down from his hair and over his face, dripping from his chin to collapse against the ground. "I can't do it. I can't move on unless you're with me, every step of the way."

They stare at each other again, blinking tears and water out of their eyes.

"…Noah, it hurts." Luke finally whimpers out.

"I'm sorry, Luke, but you need to know—"

"—no, Noah," Luke interrupts. He grabs Noah's hand and roughly pulls it under his shirt, on top of his heart. "It hurts…"

Noah breaths out, kisses Luke hard again. "I keep hurting you…" he whispers quietly, almost to himself. He looks up, meeting Luke's gaze. "I keep hurting you no matter how hard I try not to, and I'm so, so sorry. But I'll try to stop, Luke. I'll try my best—no, a million times my best, to stop hurting you. And I'll do it too; tell everyone everything. Whatever you want, whatever you need, I'll make it happen…"

"Noah, I'm not—"

"—I just need to be with you, Luke."

"That comes with a price …" Luke whispers hurriedly.

"You're worth it." He gulps and kisses Luke softly. "Whatever it is, you're worth it."

They kiss again, and I can feel Noah pressing Luke tighter against me, and I can see how their passion is overflowing through every move they make. Noah gently kisses every part of Luke's wet face, kissing away his doubt, his fear, and any sense of reluctance that he possesses. Soon, their passion overtakes their common sense, and Luke's soaked pants are slipped off. Noah unbuttons his jeans, watching Luke's face carefully. Their eyes meet, and for a moment, they sit staring at each other. At the same moment, they move towards each other, and touch tentatively. A new world patiently awaits them as they embrace tightly. It's probably a step and place both of them have dreamt and imagined for so long now, and despite the water that falls over them and around them, the wet soil that dirties their clothes and stains their skin, this moment couldn't be more perfect.

I watch as Luke wraps his bare legs around Noah's waist, and Noah kisses him again. I can see through their skin that they're terrified right now, both of them. Luke is afraid of what this could mean tomorrow, and Noah's afraid that no matter, he'll just keep hurting Luke. But with a deep breath, Noah pushes forward slowly, letting go of his fear, and watching as Luke lets go of his. They grasp at each other, and for a moment, I hear the gently slap of skin against skin, molded with the sound of rain hitting everything. Their skin is soaked to the core, causing them to occasionally slide against each other. But neither of them ever does let go.

Soon, their voices cry out loudly along with every bit of noise already surrounding them. They cling to each other tightly, and when the moment comes and passes, they sit; still clinging to each other. And I feel nearly as overwhelmed as they do. I've seen a lot of couples in my day and age, ones that seem to break up the next hour. But never have I seen two people so evidently in love and both terrified and excited by the emotions brought about by it.

I watch as Luke lifts his head up, abashedly meeting Noah's eyes. They have no more words, because all the necessary ones have already been said. So instead, they kiss again, tears slipping through their eyes, unaware that the rain has finally stopped falling.

Soon, they pull apart again, and Luke's mouth opens. "Noah, I…I came today, because I needed to see you."

"…Luke—"

"Not wanted, but needed." Their eyes meet and lock, exchanging the three words that they've yet to say; the three words that have most likely lingered on their tongues since they first met.

Noah nervously bites his lip and squeezes Luke's waist tightly. "Do you…do you regret it?"

The question is a heavy one, but despite that, it only takes a short time for Luke to answer back.

"No…not one bit."

For the next hour, they sit cuddled close to each other, as if they'd somehow been glued together. I watch and listen as they exchange stories about everything from their past Halloweens to their dinner last night. I watch and listen as they sometimes become so overwhelmed with their happiness that they nearly start crying. And I watch and listen as they both finally stand up, fully clothed, and lift their hands to my skin. They both give me a pat goodbye and rustle my overflowing leaves. And as the sun falls into dusk, I watch them leave together, hand in hand.

They're finally gone now, and I'm back to being alone. But something tells me that those two will be back; if not tomorrow, the next day; if not the next day, then the day after that, and so forth. There's something absolutely beautiful about teens in love, even if it never does last long. But at this moment, with the two of them so unable to let each other go, love has never seemed more powerful and everlasting. I may not be the most special 'ole thing around, and I may just be an 'ole, scratched and abandoned oak tree, but I can see when something is too special to ever give up on.

And my advice for these two is to never stop fighting for each other. They're both worth it.