Author's Note: This was almost a chapter of my multi-chapter fic "A Wedding in the Addams Family" but once I started writing I felt it would come out better as a one shot. Hope you all enjoy it!
Disclaimer: I do not own the Addams Family in any of it's forms
Lurch let out a groan as he watched Mr Addams jump and jitter about in the parlor with excitement. In contrast Mrs Addams sat coolly in her large peacock chair watching him, her eyes beaming.
"I hope the children get home soon!" Mr Addams shouted. "They'll be so excited!"
"It's only just three o'clock, darling," Mrs Addams replied. "They'll be home soon."
As if on cue came the squeal of the school bus tires outside. Lurch turned and pulled open the door, as the two tiny children came bustling inside.
"Hello Lurch," the smallest, Wednesday greeted him as she ran past and into the waiting arms of her mother.
"Good afternoon, children," Mrs Addams held her two children close. "Your father has some exciting news for you."
"What is it father?" Pugsley, the boy, asked.
"We're going camping!" Mr Addams burst out loudly. "Tonight!"
"Oh boy!" Pugsley exclaimed.
Wednesday gave her father a perplexed look, "What's camping?"
"Camping is..." Mr Addams faltered. "There's uh, tents! And outside!"
Mrs Addams shook her head lightly, a smile on her face, "We'll be going out into the swamp, and setting up a tent to sleep in. It's really a great way to get back in touch with nature."
"Oh," Wednesday grinned. "Can Kitty come with us?"
Mrs Addams considered the question, "Maybe not, Kitty Cat doesn't like the outdoors very much. But you may bring your black widow spider with you. Now, why don't you children go upstairs and pack your bags, we'll leave soon."
The children quickly disappeared up the stairs.
Mrs Addams lifted herself from her chair and glided across the room to her husband, "Oh, Gomez, it'll be so wonderful. Remember our last camping trip?"
"In the tombs of Emperor Naxisifice," Mr Addams grinned, showing off his teeth. "You wore that wonderful black dress. Oh Tish, you looked so beautiful."
"I'll pack it," Mrs Addams smiled at her husband. "Darling, ring for Lurch and have him tell Mama to prepare a snack for the road."
Mr Addams reached over for the nearby hangman's noose and gave it a strong tug. Before he'd even released the rope Lurch was standing by the couple.
"Lurch, go and ask Mama to get a snack ready for our trip," Mr Addams instructed.
"Oh, and Lurch," Mrs Addams interjected. "Make sure Fester has plenty of bulbs packed. And then go and help the children finish packing."
"Yes, Mr Addams. Yes, Mrs Addams."
It took a few minutes for Lurch to locate the elder Mrs Addams, but he eventually found her in the basement, throwing a leg of... something... to her alligator.
"Mrs Addams?" Lurch announced his presence at the head of the stairs.
"Yes Lurch?" Mama Addams called up. "I was just feeding the alligator, he was nipping at my legs while I was trying to hang out the washing down here."
"Mr and Mrs Addams want you to make a snack for the camping trip."
"I've got just the thing," Mama Addams gave a grin, then paused. "Oh no, wait, I just gave that to the alligator... Not to worry, I'll find something."
Lurch let out a groan before he disappeared back up the stairs and towards Uncle Fester's room.
"Hi Lurch," Uncle Fester greeted the butler with a 40 watt grin. "Hold this for me."
He thrust a lit stick of dynamite into Lurch's hand and then disappeared into his wardrobe. Lurch looked down at the stick, it had almost reached the end of it's fuse. Uncle Fester reappeared and took the stick, tossing it carelessly out the window.
"Never mind," he said as a loud explosion came from the backyard. "I can't find my timer. What was it you wanted?"
"Mrs Addams wants to remind you to pack bulbs for trip," Lurch replied.
"Oh sure," Uncle Fester opened the lid of his suitcase, revealing that it was full of nothing but bulbs.
Lurch moaned and nodded approval
He made his way to Pugsley's room first, and found the boy throwing in clothes to his rucksack.
"Help packing?" Lurch offered.
"Thanks Lurch," Pugsley pointed at his octopus tank. "Can you pack Aristotle and his food for me?"
Lurch nodded and walked to the tank. He put the octopus sprinkle food into Pugsley's bag, and then picked up the octopus itself, suddenly aware he had no idea where to put it. He let out an urgent groan at Pugsley. The boy came over and held the rucksack open wide for Lurch. He deposited the octopus inside.
"Don't forget the water Lurch."
Lurch tipped the remaining contents of the tank into the bag.
"You'd better go and help Wednesday now," Pugsley said. "I'm all done now."
Wednesday was sitting in the middle of her floor, playing with Marie Antoinette and Anne Boleyn when Lurch entered.
"Packed?" Lurch asked.
Wednesday shook her head, "I wasn't sure what to bring? Can you help?"
"Uhhh,"
Lurch opened the girl's wardrobe and pulled out two identical dresses, and folded them into her bag, then added two pair of stockings and a cactus leaf.
"Doll?" Lurch held out his hand.
Wednesday passed him Anne Boleyn, which he tucked neatly into her bag, before closing it and handing it to her. Wednesday held Marie Antoinette in one hand, and reached up with her free hand for Lurch. He took her hand and led her back downstairs, where her mother and brother, with dripping backpack, stood waiting.
"Ready Wednesday?" Pugsley asked his sister.
Wednesday nodded, skipping down the last few stairs and joining her brother, "Ready!"
"Children, why don't you go and wait in the car?" Mrs Addams suggested.
They ran off ahead.
"Mama and Fester are already in the car," Mrs Addams told the butler. "We'll leave just as soon as Mr Addams comes downstairs."
Lurch nodded, then headed outside, climbing into the driver's seat of the car. Wednesday and Pugsley were sitting up the front with him on the bench seat. Mr and Mrs Addams came down the front steps a few minutes later, not breaking each other's gaze. As soon as they were in the car, Lurch hit the accelerator and the family headed off on their trip.
The location was perfect for camping. The air was dank and thick, and the nearby swamp bubbled ferociously and the local wildlife could be hear making all kinds of strange sounds.
Mrs Addams let out a happy sigh as she shivered, wrapping her arms around herself, "Oh, darling it's wonderful. It really sends a chill through your bones."
"We couldn't have picked a better place," Mr Addams agreed. "Cara, where are the children?"
"They went with Mama to collect toadstools for dinner," Mrs Addams replied.
"Ugh"
"Yes Lurch?" Mr Addams tore his attention from his wife and aimed it towards the butler.
"The tents are ready."
He had set up three tents, one for Mama Addams and the children, one for Mr and Mrs Addams, and one for Uncle Fester, Thing, and himself.
"Thank you, Lurch," Mrs Addams smiled at him.
Mama and the children soon returned, and Uncle Fester started a small fire, which they quickly contained and used to cook dinner.
"Look at the stars!" Wednesday pointed skywards.
Everyone followed her finger to the burning balls in the sky, which twinkled twice as brightly as they did back home. Lurch gazed around the campfire, at his family- all with their necks craned upwards. He let out a rare smile, he never felt so lucky to have ended up with them as he did right now. They were, as Mrs Addams was apt to point out, a perfect match.