"About Romana…" Ace's voice trailed off suggestively.
The Doctor sighed. Loudly. "It's only been a week, Ace. You could at least give a chap more than seven days to recover from your insatiable curiosity."
They were in the kitchen, eating a late breakfast after another hasty departure from another planet that wasn't likely to welcome them back anytime soon. The conversation had been general during meal prep, Ace relaxing at the small table while the Doctor whipped up egg sandwiches and coffee.
"Time's relative, innit?" was Ace's cocky response. "Sides, I figure you need to talk, get it all out. No good brooding on things."
"Brooding?" The Doctor visibly bristled, brandishing the spatula. "When have you ever seen me brooding?"
Before Ace could do more than open her mouth, he raised a commanding hand, his hauteur only slightly marred by the fact that he was still holding the spatula. "Never mind. I'm sure you could spout off a hundred examples for me, conjured up by your lurid imagination."
"Don't need a lurid imagination around you, Professor," Ace disagreed with a knowing smirk. "Except when you skip over the good parts. So, which Romana was it? The first one? The second one? Both?" She seemed particularly intrigued by that last possibility.
"They each had unique qualities," the Doctor mused, smiling at some unseen memory. "I quite enjoyed them both. Their company," the added hastily as Ace's smirk became more pronounced. "I enjoyed their company. But Romana's first self was hardly around long enough for a real relationship."
"Long term doesn't seem to be your strong suit," Ace replied, then bit her lip and silently chastised herself. That was the way to get him talking; point out his shortcomings. Brilliant.
"No, it doesn't," the Doctor agreed as he joined her at the table. Ace was pleasantly surprised; she'd have though he'd take her comment as an excuse to end the conversation. "Personality flaw, I suppose. One that manages to stick through most of my regenerations." He handed her a plate and set the other in front of himself.
"Romana was another one that left you." Ace's voice was tentative. She didn't want to scare him off, not when he was being so cooperative. "Did she end it, like Tegan?" She took a bite of the sandwich. Giving him time to answer. And, of course, she was starving.
"Not quite the same as Tegan," the Doctor corrected with a shake of his head. He took a thoughtful sip of his coffee. "Tegan was running from something, and Romana was running to something. Quite a bit different."
"But in the end, they both left you," Ace said quietly, feeling an unexpected stab of sympathy. She took a quick gulp of her own coffee, swallowing past the sudden lump in her throat.
The Doctor nodded. "They both left me. And each time, I deserved it."
"So how did this one start? Two Time Lords traveling together, nature taking its course?" The mischievous tone had returned to Ace's voice, deliberately summoned so she could navigate this latest minefield of the Doctor's emotions.
"How very alliterative of you, Ace," the Doctor murmured, gazing into his coffee cup before taking another sip. "As for nature taking its course, I'm afraid you've misunderstood the nature of most Time Lords. My, er, 'social activities' are rather outside the Gallifreyan norm. Not entirely unheard of, but certainly not as much a part of everyday life as the same activities are on Earth."
"What, Time Lords don't usually take lovers?" Ace had wanted desperately to say "have sex," but decided at the last minute to be more discreet. No sense in ruining the confidential mood.
The Doctor shook his head. "Not usually, no. And Romana was very young, fresh out of the Academy and fully indoctrinated in all things Gallifreyan. I was determined to educate her on what the larger universe had to offer, but romance was the last thing on either of our minds when we first met."
"So what changed?"
"She did. Literally, by regenerating. She changed, and she decided to stay with me even though we'd dealt with the Key to Time, the ostensible reason for her traveling with me in the first place. I changed, too," he added. "Changed how I thought of her, how I looked at her, once I had it in my head that she wasn't going to leave the first chance she got." That had been a distinct possibility, especially once she'd been informed that it wasn't the President of Gallifrey who'd sent her to join the Doctor's quest. He'd been secretly relieved when she opted to remain, without even discussing the matter, although he'd heard her muttering unkind things about the White Guardian now and again.
"Her regenerating unsettled me," the Doctor continued slowly, his gaze once again growing distant. He spoke softly, half to himself, and Ace wondered if he even remembered she was there. As if in response to her thoughts, he looked down at her sharply. "I dislike the feeling, then and now. So I refused to acknowledge it at the time."
"Was it bad?" Romana's data in the TARDIS databanks was spotty, deliberately so, Ace suspected. She knew the Time Lady had regenerated before they met up with Davros on Skaro, but not why. Nor had Ace ever personally witnessed a regeneration, although the various descriptions in the database, gleaned from more than one former companion's accounts, were fascinating. Fascinating, and horrifying. For Romana to have regenerated so young, something must have happened during their quest for the last component to the Key.
But the Doctor surprised her. "Bad? I suppose it was, but not in the way you mean. She wasn't dying, at least, not to my knowledge. I suppose she might have kept it to herself, but that wasn't the impression I received. No, it was how…casual she appeared, flippant, almost. As if regenerating was something to be done on a whim. But we both knew better than that, so I assumed there was something else going on. Especially once she settled on a particular form…"