Title: Fall
Author: Sandolious
Rating: T or PG – 13
Warning: Homosexuality and Heterosexuality. Violence. Language.
Summery: Some secrets are meant to be kept. Some betrayals are unforgivable. He has been betrayed one too many times. After the war, one pilot searches for salvation.
Disclaimer. I own nothing but the story.
Night was fading fast; the horizon began to blaze with celestial fire as the lone figure rose. The crisp winter air bit at the exposed skin, flushing cheeks and nose. A young man stood gazing fiercely at the horizon, indigo eyes frozen in flames. His heart shaped face contorted as a consuming rage washed over his mind, lips drawn tight in a sneer. Clenched in his left hand, knuckles white, long tapered fingers digging into the contours was a glass figurine. A gundam. Wing Zero in full detailed glory, hand made by its' pilot after the end of the war. The young man tightened his grip on the thick glass, snarling as the sun peeked over the edge of the world. With a growl he threw the glass gundam with all his might, his rage, his hurt and watched it satisfyingly disintegrate upon impact with 01's car. He was pleased with the sizable dent left in the cool silver metal of the vehicle. He watched the light catch the small particles, their shimmering presence more acceptable then the whole they once were.
Night ran into morning and Duo Maxwell made his way silently back to his hotel where he would pick up his duffle bag and catch the earliest flight out of Sanq. His mission was finished; an outlet to the numbness raging under his skin; a promise broken and the consequence. He made his way along the deserted sidewalks, cataloging the emotions running rampant in his head. His bangs had grown obscenely long since the end of the war, the middle brushing past his nose tapering down to his chin. A veil of chestnut locks, obscuring his cold calculating eyes, death's hidden gaze.
The journey to the airport was filled with internal dialogue quietly cautioning the man in his overly emotional state to release what was honestly hurting him. The war had ended a year ago and with it the relationship he had with Pilot 01, Heero Yuy. There had been a promise spoken in the dead of night, after one of their trysts. Words whispered in binding contracts. Skin to skin lit by the moon the only witness to the signing of the contract by swollen lips. With no proof though, the contract fell void at the announcement of the end of the fighting; burned in the heat of Heero's gaze as it fell on the former Queen. Null and void were the memories of caresses and words of love. Worthless were emotions once associated with his comrade. He had been forgotten, ignored by his ex-lover, who offered his services not five minutes after the announcement of peace.
So here he was, flying half way across the world to a reunion with his comrades whom he had not seen (since) in a year. There had been a light, a flame brightly burning in the soul of Duo. The flames would flicker and lick at the emotions meandering through his being, drawing them close and setting them a blaze. This internal fire drew in the attention of everyone else, would light up a room no matter how large. The flame was missing now, a fake shell of a human left in its wake.
Stepping out of the plane and into the terminal, Duo made his way steadily through the crowd down to the waiting area, keeping his head bent down, eyes scanning all those present for threats. There was a large gathering of people ahead greeting the newly arrived couple; their faces alight with happiness and curiosity. Their voices merged with the annoying buzz of all other beings in to the small airport, increasing the already high decibel of noise. He was startled out of his observations by a soft voice calling his name in question. Stopping to turn to his left, his mouth twitched upwards into a genuine smile, indigo eyes twinkling as he spotted a petite blond with ocean-green eyes and flaxen white hair waving him over. Looking past the blond to his companions, he grinned in relief as a weight was lifted off his chest. The tall European man with caramel brown hair hiding half his face, gem green eyes and a faint upturned corner of his lips place one hand on the shoulder of the blond while their other companion stood a foot away from the pair, black hair tied in a loose pony tail, slanted sole eyes staring intensely at the American in slight irritation, thin arms crossed impatiently.
"Duo..?"
Sauntering over to the trio, Duo ran a hand through his bangs, brushing them away from his eyes for a second before they fell back in place, to get a good look at his friends. He stopped directly in front of Quatre, smiling gently at the sensitive Arabian.
"Quatre! I have missed you." Duo greeted before grinning mischievously, pulling him into a tight embrace and picking the small youth off the floor to spin him around, laughing manically as the blond struggled to get free, yelling at Duo. Feeling merciful, Duo set the blond down again, chuckling at the flushed and dizzy look of his comrade. Turning to Trowa, Duo held out his hand and gave a more sedated greeting.
"Trowa. Good to see you again." He received a nod of acknowledgement from the tall youth before moving to his final companion. Lifting on slim brow, the American faced the Chinese youth and gave him a full graceful waist length bow, greeting the Asian man with the utmost respect.
"Chang Wufei, it is an honor to see you again."
Wufei paused, staring into the American's eyes for sincerity before nodding curtly. "Maxwell. Still surprising, I see."
Duo grinned, turning his attention back on the blonde.
"So, Q, shall we be off? The plane ride was hell and the food was still alive. And let's not even forget the preflight lectures about safety. I tried to inform the attendant of other useful survival tips in the case of an emergency but she didn't take well to using the dead bodies for protection against the elements."
"By Allah Duo, you didn't…" Quatre exclaimed in disbelief while Trowa snickered quietly and Wufei muttered to himself about braided idiots as they made their way to the parking lot and into the waiting limousine.
The hour long drive to the mansion was quiet and peaceful as Duo slumped into a corner and fell into a fitful exhausted sleep, watched over by his companions' concerned gaze. Quatre rubbed lightly at the center of his chest, brows drawn in concentration, marine eyes tracing over the huddled form of his friend. The year apart had done wonders on their friend. He had grown physically yes, muscles toned, inches grained, hair longer; it was his weary face still drawn in sleep, the slight bruises around his eyes, the thin joints of his wrist and almost too thin waist which brought concern to the small Arabian. It was the fatigue and darkness surrounding the braided man's emotion drawing out the worry of his sympathetic heart. There was something wrong with his friend, Quatre concluded eyes caressing the drawn face in compassion, and he would do anything in his power to help his companion. Shifting back into his seat, Quatre snuggled into the side of his lover, whispering his concerns to the others, eyes drifting between the two to rest back on their sleeping comrade. For now they would have to wait.
There was a unanimous decision once they arrived at the mansion, to simply let the braided youth continue to sleep, so with some maneuvering, and several false starts, Wufei managed to cradle the slight man to his crest and out of the car. The slight movements jostled their precious cargo out of his slumber as they made their way up the path and steps to the front door.
Opening sleep fogged eyes, Duo shifted in Wufei's embrace.
"'Fei?" the indigo eyed man mumbled into the Chinese pilot's shoulder.
"Shh. Go back to sleep Duo. We will talk later. You are safe." Was the quiet reply, lulling the man back into the dreamscape. In his core, Wufei wondered who would have the ability to harm his friend without a backwards glance, and yet he had a fair idea who could do it without even stopping to give it a second thought.
Lying the braided youth on the turned down bed, Wufei brushed soft bangs from closed eyes and wondered how his companion could be so strong still. With a final light caress of finger tips to pale cheek, Wufei exited the room closing the door with a slight 'click'.
There are nights when the cold temperature of the soul is more then space. Deep in the center of your being a wintry frost travels through each cell, every vein, absorbing what heat is generated so it can multiply, dropping your temperature lower. The tendrils grasp the emotions pooling within your flesh, holding them close in their struggle to be free, numbing the contours of your heart and mind. The cold eats away at the life force cradled fragilely in your being, Duo thought, as he awoke slowly from his slumber. He wanted to shiver, to create a heat source with enough energy to dissipate the raging numb washing over him. He was so tired of being cold. So tired of giving. Blinking open glassy blue-violet eyes, he let a quiet sigh pass his parched lips, a prayer of defeat.
Climbing out of bed, Duo stretched and grabbed a change of clothes before jumping into the shower. He pressed the heals of his hands to his eyes rubbing away the sleep, locking the emotions in a tight box as hot water cascaded over his thin body. Once washed, dried and dressed in a black clingy turtle neck, matching trousers and wool grey socks, he made his way out of the room and into the hall, searching for his friends.
Chestnut locks were pulled over his shoulder and patted dry with a towel as Duo ambled his way down long corridors and elegant stair cases. Once he hit the ground floor, he followed the sound of voices to a large sitting room with bay window seats. A couch sat facing the windows with a loveseat to its left, the back to the entry way and several side chairs to the right. Wufei sat curled into the couch corner closest to the loveseat occupied by the Trowa and Quatre. The Asian man, sipped at a cup of tea, staring out the windows, voicing opinions when needed in the quiet conversation held by Quatre.
"She has the right goal in mind; it simply will not work however with the means she chooses. Preventers are needed still and cutting back its funding for more peace missions to the Colonies will not stop another attack if it occurs nor will it help in the continuing fight against the up rising organizations. Total pacifism, though a wonderful idea, will not hold within our society's structures. She is weakening us from the inside out and there is nothing we can do until the elections in November next year or if she finally resigns." The blond sighed, setting his tea cup on the low table in front of him.
"She is a figure head who has lost the public's appeal." Wufei added, nodding.
Stepping further into the room, Duo silently ran his fingers through his slightly damp locks. "Discussing Miss Relena and her soon to come down fall?" Duo asked innocently in the lull, snickering at Quatre as he jumped from his seat and spun around, eyes wide.
"Duo!"
"Nice reaction time. Need to work on those senses, however." The indigo eyed man smiled, watching the blond youth shake his head.
"How are you doing? Did you sleep well?" The Arabian asked, once he regained his composure and motioned Duo to take a seat. Duo moved to sit on the edge of the couch next to Wufei, still running his hand through his long locks, before separating it and beginning to plait it.
"Fine and fine, Qat. How long have I been down?"
"4 hours." Trowa responded quietly. Duo hummed in acknowledgement, tying off his hair and settling back into the couch, knees drawn loosely up to his chest, hands resting on the tops of his feet.
"Anyone else coming?" Duo asked cocking his head to the side, looking at the couple to his left.
"Heero and Miss Relena are arriving late tonight. Miss Po, Lady Une and Catherine will be arriving tomorrow. Zechs arrived with Hilde and Wufei. Howard is to arrive the day after next." Quatre recited as if from a list. Raising an eyebrow, Duo turned to Wufei with an expectant look.
"So, come on. Where is Sexy Zechy? He still vain about his hair?"
"He is out with Noin. And I sincerely hope you don't call him that to his face." Grunted Wufei, shaking his head in disbelief at Duo's nickname for the long haired Preventer. The rest of the evening pasted in comfortable companionship as the quartet was joined by the rest of the present visitors. The atmosphere was warm and lazy, letting the usually high strung group relax into their selves, laughing and joking with each other, relating humorous stories from the past year and reminiscing of the past. And while the drink was flowing smoothly, none of the occupants drank much, content in their sober states to embrace the happiness currently given to them.
It was much later, before dinner was to be served, when the atmosphere lighting their souls was shattered. More precisely, the arrival of Heero Yuy and Relena Peacecraft brought tension into the room, as Duo refused to greet either with more then a politely cold, 'hello'. After, Duo removed himself from the room, garnering looks from several of the occupants at his hasty retreat. This was unusual behavior from their braided companion and even more so was his greeting to the newly entered couple. Quatre was at a loss, staring at his partner and running a hand in small circles on the middle of his chest, trying in vain to alleviate some of the pain and emotions running high from his friends. Trowa, gave a curt nod to the group then left to speak with Duo while Quatre did his part as the host. Wufei tossed an irritated look at Yuy before starting up a conversation with the quiet group. Soon the atmosphere was relaxed once again with an underlying tension coursing through the voices.
Duo stood at the end on the hall on the second floor looking out the balcony windows, violet eyes distant. He was still, unnaturally so, as the breathing of his lungs was the only movement from his body. Several minutes passed and the braided pilot could hear the muffled words of his companions down stairs, the soft patter of Trowa's feet against the carpet, the up-beat humming of the maid in a side room. All at once his heart ached, missing what he had neglected so carelessly, his family. Trowa paused a few feet behind him, forest green eyes calculating.
"Duo?" The uni-banged man questioned quietly in a soothing tenor.
"If at the end of the Wars, Cathy had asked you to travel with her, with the circus, under the impression that it was a life or death thing and you would be unable to contact or see Quatre for many years, would you go? Knowing, if you didn't it would ruin your relationship with Cathy?" Duo asked, closing his eyes from the peaceful night sky, pregnant with stars.
"No. I would not leave Quatre."
"You are a good man Tro. Q is damned lucky to have you. And you, him." The braided pilot whispered, turning to face his friend. Indigo eyes dimmed in the soft hall light, reflecting a hallowed center in their fathomless depths.
"Duo?"
"I've found no ones perfect, however some come close. And of those that do, they are callous, cruel and selfish. They make promises and break them just as quickly if it impedes on their instant gratification sensibility. They are ugly. There are others, though, who come close and are like you and Quatre. Shining with an inner light, handsome, loyal. You both are blessed."
"Duo..?"
"I just hurt Tro. I am tired. Simply hurt and tired soul deep in my heart; in my mind, in my bones. And I am failing to heal as this cancer devours me." Duo sighed, bowing his head as tears threatened to gather and spill down pale cheeks.
"Trowa? Dinner's being served!" Quatre's voice echoed up to them, breaking the somber mood.
Duo shifted, straightening his stance and smiling as a carefully constructed mask enclosed upon his face. Trowa sighed inaudibly at the sight, upset at his dear friend's pain and need for a mask. It had been suggested toward the end of the War, they would shed their masks, to accomplish the process of coming into their actual selves, and it was painful to watch a mask they, Quatre, Wufei and himself, had painstakingly removed piece by piece, fall into place so easily and convincingly. Trowa nodded to Duo, ushering him down the hall and steps to the dining room, where they parted for Trowa to take his place to the right of Quatre who sat at the head of the table and left of Relena while Duo sat across from Wufei to the left of Noin at the end of the table. He refused to meet Heero's eyes, who sat next to Wufei, when the piecing dark blues stared. It was a long tense dinner, of which, Duo only made it to the third course before excusing himself politely and taking a long walk around the wet grounds for a fresh air.
Back in the dining hall, more then one occupant noticed the braided man's odd behavior and decided to comment on it.
"Are you sure there is nothing wrong with Duo, Quatre?" Noin asked from her place next to Zechs, concern darkening her eyes as she sipped a smooth aged cabernet. Quatre sighed, placing his fork down quietly and wiping his lips with a pristine white cloth napkin, aqua eyes pained as they surveyed the rooms guests.
"He is as well, as to be expected. Given the circumstances, of course." Hilde interjected for the blond, knowing his devotion to Duo's privacy. Zechs raised a slim eyebrow at the dark haired mechanic in question. They had been working for months together and not heard anything about Duo, or his situation. This new information was interesting and disturbing at the same time. Duo, while annoy some times, was one of the few people he could stand for long periods of time without threatening castration, previous enemy or not.
"The circumstances? What has affected the prankster to the point of being melancholic and docile?" The Lightening Count questioned the group, swirling his wine in the large crystal goblet.
"He was hurt." Quatre answered vaguely, scowling at Wufei's snort of disbelief.
"You do not agree with Quatre's assessment Mister Chang?" Relena spoken, feigned interested coating her voice. Wufei kept the contempt out of his voice in his impassioned response.
"Being hurt is an understatement. Where he was whole before, he is now scarred and broken. His heart was destroyed in a blink of an eye. He's been alone this past year trying to heal and had to be begged to come to this party. Who he is now, it not but a flickering flame to the spitfire he once was."
"This has been going on for a year? That would make it… the War's end." Noin spoke, voice trailing off.
"Who would have nerve or ability to throw away such a bright light?" Zechs asked sadly crystal blue eyes darkening with emotion and thought.
Trowa, Wufei and Hilde looked at various things at the table, refusing to answer the question, while Quatre looked discreetly at Heero, aqua eyes burning with anger.
"Who, indeed." Their polite host asked, ending the topic of conversation. "Is anyone up to coffee in the lounge or did you wish to retire for the night?"
The majority expressed interest in retiring, and bide the young host and his lover 'good night,' heading up to their respective rooms for a long peaceful rest.
The morning, warm with soft yellows and pastel oranges, graced the mansion's occupants late into the day as overcast clouds evaporated, shining beams of light into the many windows. Sheer curtain dampened the intensity of the light, warming exposed skin lying against satin and silk sheets. Faces lost in the world of dreams, relaxed and innocent, heated with the soft caresses cascading from the windowpane. The occupants woke one by one, content in the mid morning haze of warmth and comfort, resigned to stay put for a few more minutes, savoring the atmosphere they are unable to during their normal schedules.
If anything, the beautiful weather called to all the hearts in the mansion, beckoning them to come out and play. A hope set in their minds. Today would be better, and last night was just a memory from a long ago life. With that in mind, Duo who sat perched on the end of his bed bathing in a strong beam of sunshine, decided to put his negative emotions on hold, for now. This was a vacation, a reunion of his family, his friends, and he refused to be the one to hamper everyone's happiness. Stretching out like a cat, Duo yawned, scratching his exposed stomach and collapsing back into the bed. The girls were to arrive today, and they alone would brighten his day.
During his year away, Duo had grown close to several females at the Preventer Head Quarters and some of the diplomats when he had saved them from peril or given important information needed to arrest some of the UESA's most dangerous criminals. And while not officially on the Preventers' list or payroll, he was reimbursed for his intelligence and given several code names, effectively making the Preventers seem more concrete and constantly in motion, inadvertently helping with the much need publicity. He had not contacted Lady Une in several weeks and had seen Sally Po just last week before his detour to L1. Catherine, though not part of the task force, was a good friend to whom he would turn to for the latest gossip about his fellow pilots. He had a nagging feeling however; his secret agent employment would be brought into the light soon. Une had been testing the waters for months now and was bordering on blatantly asking him to join the Preventers as a full agent with partner and regulations. While the thought was nice, Duo would have to negotiate some aspects of the job into the contract and try to negate some of the regulations from constricting how he worked. He had a wealth of informants placed among the Earth and the Colonies, many of whom, he used in the war, and he would refuse to give them up for the use of the Preventers no matter what. There had been a promise when asking them to for help, a promise of protection and anonymity from him. He never broke promises, not if he could help it.
Sighing, Duo got up and prepared for the day knowing it was going to be full of surprises.
She was late. Never in her life had she been late. It was Po's fault really. If they had not stopped to help the medics on the way over then they would have arrived on time, but no, the good doctor just had to play savior and help the dying patient. Damn woman. Une thought, driving recklessly fast through the streets to make up for the time lost. It was past noon and she had told Winner and Barton they would be there at 10 AM, not half past lunch.
"Honestly, Commander, there is no need to be in such a hurry." Sally growled grabbing her door handle tightly as the blue sedan speed through another sharp corner.
"Sally…" Catherine warned from the back seat, praying they would make it in one piece and wondering how she had been talked into being picked up by the Head of the Preventers and the Preventers top doctor, both of whom she believed to mentally unstable.
"Doctor, what was our ETA, told to Winner and Barton?" Une asked in an unnaturally quiet voice.
"10 AM, however it was an estimated time." Sally shot back narrowing pale blue eyes.
"Have you ever, in all the years of knowing me, seen me late to a meeting?" her voice belying a soft tone, silk over a sharp blade. There was a pause, where Sally bit her tongue and swallowed, shaking her head.
"Late to a political event?"
"No." the blond Asian woman snarled quietly, gnawing on her bottle lip in agitation.
"Late to any gathering in which I have attended?" Une turned rage darken eyes on to the doctor, waiting for a response.
"…Never…" was the quiet word whispered in the tension filled sedan.
"Then how can you see it fit for me to be late now?"
"Oh come off it! That man needed help!" Sally nearly screamed as she was thrown onto the door, another too sharp turn.
"You doctor, need to understand, you can't save everyone. He was out of your jurisdiction, meaning he could effectively sue you if there are any more complications from you handy work. Every one is mortal and if it's his time to die, then he shall. Shit happens!"
The car turned eerily silent as both passengers' look at the Commander in shock, wondering briefly if they had heard her right, looking to the other for conformation.
"Shit… happens?" Catherine asked slowly disbelief in her voice.
"Yes." Was the monotone reply.
"Shit happens?" Sally asked looking at her commander with wide sparkling eyes. Her voice shook with repressed emotion as laughter threatened to bubble to the surface.
"Yes, Po. Shit happens." And then it seemed to hit the Commander, a woman of decorum, who never cursed, but instead fought verbally with wits and glares, had just spewed the first thing that came to mind with out checking it. Sally catching the looking of horror across her commander's face laughed full heartily at Une's expense.
"You have spent too much time with Duo, Commander." Catherine supplied from the back, holding back her giggles. The rest of the ride was filled with Une coming up with ways for revenge against the braided idiot for his influence.
It was a surprise then, to the group gathered in the dining room of the mansion, for their lunch to be interrupted by a shrill rage filled scream echoing off the walls. The occupants froze, holding their breath and listening for the intruders. They were put at ease as laughter followed the scream. Looking to their host, they waited for a response before proceeding to do a search of the house. Coughing lightly, cheeks tinged pink with embarrassment, Quatre gave the group a small smile.
"It would seem, some other guests have arrived." They were interrupted again with another rage filled scream.
"MAXWELL!" All eyes turned to Duo, who had paled to a ghastly grey pigment. His large violet eyes were wide and dilated as he tried to remember if he had pulled a prank on someone. Turning his eyes to the door way where the sounds of fast approaching foot steps were heard coming closer, Duo swallowed a large lump in his throat.
"Duo... have you done something to… warrant someone's anger?" Quatre asked slowly eyeing his friend with concern as the approach of foots steps grew even louder.
"…No… at least… none that I have a recollection of…" The braided man slowly pushed his chair away from the table and stood. Pushing his chair in he turned towards the door, however before he could take a step the door flung open. There stood in raging glory Une flanked by a giggling Sally and smirking Catherine. Une surveyed the room and narrowed her eyes on the target, stalking towards her prey.
"Maxwell! This is your fault. I will kill you. First I am going to strip you and skin you. Then I am going to disembowel you and make sure you are still conscious and alive. I am going to remove your genitalia with a dull bent teaspoon. I am going to spray hydrochloric acid on your exposed tissue and then drown you in formaldehyde. It will be painful." Une glowered, speaking in a slow icy tone directly into Duo's face, keeping eye contact.
"Isn't that a bit much for the supposed crime?" Catherine asked quietly from her place behind Quatre's seat.
"I agree with Catherine." Sally grinned eyes alight with humor.
"So do I." Duo put in, smiling hesitantly at Une, who growled in response. Straightening her self, Une smoothed down her coat and shirt, looking at the far wall of the dining room, eyes unfocused.
"Fine then." She began, smiling maliciously at the violet eyed man in front of her, her smile widening as the man began slowly backing away from her. "You Agent White," Hilde gasped eyes widening at the familiar name. "Excuse me, Agent White, Agent Warlock, Agent Midnight, Agent Panther…" Une was interrupted again as Duo's face twisted into a deep bitter angry scowl as she listed off his code names without mercy, daring her to say them all. An icy dangerous air had formed around Duo with her words, challenging her. "You, Agent will arrive at 9 AM in one month at Head Quarters to train the new recruits and will be assigned to Cassidy's protection."
"No." Duo snarled.
"You will, or else everything will be leaked to the press." Une intoned dangerously.
"What the hell is going on!" Hilde screamed, jumping from her chair and turning toward the two opposing forces.
"I have to agree. What is going on, and what do those codenames have to do with Duo?" Noin asked.
"You have no idea who you are dealing with." Duo whispered viciously.
"I know enough, Maxwell. You will do what I say or I will drag your children into this!" Une commanded. Violet eyes flashed with violence.
"Lady Une, you will be crippled, mute, deaf and blind before you could even touch one of them. That is a promise." He stated calmly, shoving past her and out of the dining room before anyone could say a word, his footsteps deadly silent.
There are stories, buried deep in newsreels from years ago, of mothers and fathers in third world countries doing all they could to ensure their children's survival. Stories of mothers selling organs and body parts to feed and cloth their children are hidden in the black market history. Animals will go to great lengths to protect their off spring, and in Duo's case, those he has deemed part of his family. Being an orphan of war, he knew the hardships the parentless children would be faced with once the War of the Colonies was finished. He took it upon himself to ensure at least some of the children would be taken care of and the colonies slums like L2 would have enough funding and protection to foster stability. He visits these churches and orphanages regularly while on missions from the Preventers. In all truth the small children with quick hands and masking grins are his weakness, reminding him of the life he might have had. He tries to atone for his deeds during the war with his volunteering and donations. His protection. Many have found out the hard way not to harm the innocent and helpless. They gave him a name.
Owari?
Input is needed. I have had this simmering for a while but want to know if this should be continued. All input would be greatly appreciated.
Sand