Title: Magical Creatures and their Superstitions

Author: Here's Your Cheese Omelette

Beta: Denise

Summary: Because unicorns only visit virgins.

It was a beautiful morning. The sun was shining, lovers were out merrily on their dates, people were happy… and Arthur was wailing. Loudly.

"Now I'll never see my unicorns again!" Arthur cried, as he pounded his fists against his lover's chest. "Thanks a lot, you bloody git!"

You see, yesterday was the one year anniversary of Arthur and Alfred's officially becoming a couple, and their friends wanted to do something special to celebrate it. So Francis, Gilbert and Antonio gathered the small group into a restaurant and had a pleasant meal before Prussia herded them all into the nearest bar.

This, of course, was part of the Bad Friends Trio's plan—well, mainly Francis' plan. Gilbert was just willing to help for the sake of being entertained, and Antonio just tagged along with his friends.

The thing was that Francis decided that enough was enough, and that things needed to speed up with regards to his friend's love life. Meaning, he was getting really annoyed at the fact Alfred and Arthur had yet to sleep together! Even worse, in the Frenchman's opinion, was the fact that Arthur, his friend, was still a virgin!

Things must be done!

Besides, he knew the two wanted to do the dirty. Something was just holding them back. Probably Arthur, Francis thought. So he decided to be the good friend and make them drunk so they—well, Arthur—would stop being shy and just do it already!

So that was that. Of course, Francis, Gilbert and Antonio did a smashing job with their plan, and later that evening had sent the pair back to their—or rather, Alfred's—home in a drunken, but not too drunk, state, so that they might finally have sex. And if their body language and actions meant anything, those two would definitely be having sex the moment they get back.

Weren't they lucky to have such good friends?

So that's what led to this morning's situation of a very unhappy Arthur and a distressed and slightly confused Alfred trying to calm his lover down.

"Artie," he said. "What happened? Why are you so upset?"

The Briton looked up at the younger man and glared at him accusingly. "You!" He huffed. "You slept with me!"

"Yes, I guess I did. And?" Alfred replied. He still didn't quite get why Arthur was so upset. Was it because he didn't remember their first time? Alfred wasn't nearly as drunk as Arthur was, so he remembered what happened last night. It was quite a shock for the American when Arthur suddenly clung to him at the bar and started groping him, all the while making out with him passionately. After all, since they got together a year ago they never went past fondling, and it was always Alfred who started it. Iggy never allowed him to go all the way, despite allowing anything and everything that could possibly happen before actual penetration.

Alfred never complained. He whined occasionally, but he understood that if Iggy thought he wasn't ready yet, he wasn't ready—so he waited. Unlike his older lover, Alfred was no longer virgin by a long shot, and since Arthur was still very much virgin, he'd be having many fears about his first time.

So seeing as how passionate Artie was being last night, the American took that as a signal for him to finally go all the way.

And boy did he go all the way.

He felt bad about taking advantage of Artie, but damn if he didn't make it really good for the Brit. Alfred was a good lover, and he proved that to Arthur last night, receiving much approval from said Brit as the night went on.

Of course, Arthur wasn't sharing his thoughts, and still looked at him disbelievingly, as if he truly wondered why it was so hard for Alfred to see why he was so bloody upset.

"You slept with me!" Arthur said again, looking as though the answer was obviously in the statement mentioned. Of course, being Alfred, he still didn't see it, and merely nodded dumbly, asking the older man to elaborate. "You slept with me, Alfred. Meaning I am no longer a virgin." The Brit was now sending Alfred a look that clearly asked if he understood his plight now that he had explained. The American merely replied with a look that clearly meant no.

"You idiot!" Arthur shouted. "I am no longer a virgin! Meaning my unicorns will no longer visit me!" Distress was clearly showing on his face, as the older man looked just about ready to cry. His eyes looked at his lover expecting immediate comfort and thousands of apologies for what happened; unfortunately, said expectations were let down by a puzzled looking Alfred who did not move a muscle. Well, maybe except for a few facial muscles that made his brows knit in confusion.

"Iggy," Alfred said. "What's the connection with the unicorns? That kinda came out of nowhere."

"You inconsiderate and illiterate buffoon! Have you listened to anything I've said about my magical friends?" Arthur shouted at him. "As I've said dozens of times before, unicorns only visit those who are virgin. I am no longer virgin. So, obviously, they will no longer visit me!"

Understanding washed over the American's face, as he pulled his irate lover into his arms. "So that's why you're so upset, and also why you never let me go all the way with you." He said. "Well, I'm sorry, Artie, but what's done is done. I 'm sorry that you can't see your unicorn friends anymore, but you still have other friends. You still have me." Alfred smiled at Arthur. "Besides, don't you think it would've been unfair to me if you wouldn't let me go all the way with you at all? Even if you had such a reason, I'd still want to sleep with you. I love you too much to be able to resist you for that long!"

Arthur blushed at Alfred's valid point, and allowed his anger to melt away. Even if he wasn't virgin anymore, he could still pass messages through his fairy friends to the unicorns. "Well, I guess you're right," the Brit said softly to Alfred. "It was quite worth it in any case."

"So you do remember last night!" Alfred said happily. "And you still admit that I'm a good lover. I thought you'd deny it once you became sober."

Arthur leaned over towards the younger man and gave him a peck on the lips. "Well, who knows?" he said. "I just might still be drunk."

With that, the Brit climbed out of bed, leaving his lover tangled among the sheets, and announced that he was off to the kitchen to get something to eat. He was starving.

Alfred just continued to stay in bed, lying down peacefully, happy at having resolved the damsel's worry. He'd get out of bed in a bit, but just not yet. Maybe after 10 minutes or so. He knew that, by now, Arthur would be preparing a cup of tea, taking his time before beginning to cook. He'd be down at the kitchen before Arthur finished his cup; he didn't want to spoil his good mood with Arthur's cooking after all. He'd just volunteer to cook, saying how Arthur should rest since he must be tired after last night. He predicts Arthur will blush, argue a bit, but eventually submit to Alfred. It's the perfect morning after, thinks the American.

Downstairs, Arthur was indeed preparing a cup of tea—an herbal one, suggested by Kiku to help him relax. But he wasn't alone, as Alfred thought. He had his friends with him. The fairies were present; so were the pixies, and also a few unicorns.

"Did you enjoy last night?" asked a mischievous fairy. You could practically hear the leer in her voice. "We all know what happened between you and Alfred."

The Brit blushed heavily at the thought of his perverse little friends peering in from the dark areas of the room or from outside the window just to watch him finally have sex with Alfred. The nasty little voyeurs. "I did, actually. He was right when he said he was an excellent lover."

"And the episode earlier today?" asked the same fairy. "Something about Charles and Marcus not visiting anymore?"

Arthur's blush grew as said unicorns smirked at him. "You were making us your excuse, weren't you?" Charles said. "So you could keep refusing Alfred's advances."

"Well, it didn't work, so belt up, you," the Brit replied, hiding his face in his cup as he took another sip.

All of a sudden, his magical friends surrounded him and gave him a rather awkward hug (since the stool he sat on wasn't exactly placed for a sudden group hug). "Heehee," a pixie giggled. "Even if the whole virgin thing is true, it wouldn't apply to you, Arthur." Both unicorns nodded at that.

"We adore you too much to stay away," Marcus said, nuzzling his face against Arthur's side. "I must say, though, Arthur. You are a rather good actor. Fake tears and everything!"

The group laughed and continued talking until the soft thumps of Alfred's footsteps could be heard coming from the stairs. They all scurried away, some hiding nearby to watch the unfolding of events, some actually leaving to give the couple some privacy. The group decided they'd let Arthur keep up the charade with the unicorns for a while. After all, Alfred couldn't see them anyway. He wouldn't mind if a few unicorns with fairies and pixies riding on them watched them go at it from the windows.

Not to mention Arthur wouldn't be able to shoo them away, since he'd expose his lie by doing that.

The magical folk all laughed at their plan. They all loved Arthur to bits, but they were still naughty creatures at heart, and who better to indulge their naughty nature in than with their favourite Brit?

A/n: Finished at 4:30 AM exactly on May 7, 2010. J Hope you enjoyed reading this! I certainly enjoyed writing it! It's purely for fun, this fanfic. Inspiration hit me as I read another fanfic wherein I got my summary from. Uke in Denial is the title. I'm not sure about the author. Do forgive me for that.

Please review! I absolutely adore reviews!

BC: 3 Perfect morning after. And I loved the 'good actor' part! I really did believe Arthur, you know XD

Update A/N: Happy birthday to me! :D It's now August 7, 2011 and I'm legaaaaaaal.! Haha. :) Btw, a Spamano fic will be coming soon!