The Paparazzi Diaries

Chapter 1

Albus Potter sat stiffly at the edge of his seat. He'd only just been sorted into Gryffindor and his brother, James, was already jeering at him. He had hoped that by coming to Hogwarts James would act at least a little more friendly but whatever it was Albus was blocking it out, trying very hard to not completely fall off his seat from all the blaring. He did not understand why he was so surprised that all the blaring was not coming from only James – no, James was a very small minority. It seemed Albus Potter was the newest celebrity at school. He'd encountered this before of course, his mother and father were the most famous couple in the wizarding world and as a result he, James and Lily and his entire family had been under the spotlight before they could even recall it. He had not expected however to have this kind of reaction at school.

Rose, his cousin, who was sitting next to him nudged him in the ribs and he gaped at her.

'Ohw come on Rose, what was that for?'

'Pay attention, Al! McGonagall is giving us an important speech and you shan't want to miss it!' she said quickly.

'Are you telling me that you aren't bothered by any of this?' he jerked his head in the direction of a group of second year girls at the Hufflepuff table all pretending to be flicking through identical copies of Witch Weekly but instead giggling to themselves and flashing over-excited smiles in his direction.

'Just ignore them.' She said swiftly.

'Ignore them.' He sighed under his breath but a fifth year beside him was eagerly passing a quill for him to sign his forehead.

'Got the first signature from the new Potter!' he said turning back to his amazed friends who were gawking at the scribble at his forehead.

'Get the Weasley girl next!' another whispered.

Victoire flashed her face to the side. Peering over to see which Weasley girl they were referring to and the gesture was not missed.

'No, not you Victoire, the new one, Rose is it? Although I did read somewhere – the Prophet I think - That you had to sign some rowdy Tornado fans backsides!' the fifth year said.

James spluttered on his pumpkin juice and sprayed it out from laughter. Rose gave an unsteady giggle and Albus just shook his head. The stupidity of some people.

'Shut it, Webster!' Victoire told the fifth year and gave him a clamp round the back of his head.

He mocked being in pain but Albus caught the sharp glare that she gave him and he fell silent.

Albus looked over at his other relatives. There seemed to be so many of them in the great hall, mostly seating around the Gryffindor table carefree.

The eldest was Victoire. She was a Seventh year now. Next in line was his Uncle Percy's daughter, Molly who was a fifth year. Then Dominique was a fourth year also a daughter of his Uncle Bill's. Louis and Fred were third years. James was a second year but tagged along with Fred and Louis. The Potter-Weasley clan all seemed to keep together and Albus and Rose would just have to fit in.

'James,' Victoire suddenly snapped, 'What have you got under the table?'

'Uh – Nothing.' He lied.

Whatever it was he quickly passed it under the table to Fred who smirked and tucked it in his pocket.

'I swear to God Fred, if you so much as dare cause any trouble this year… I'll – I'll kill you.' Victoire hissed at him.

'Blimey, Victoire, best not let Webster hear you say that, it'll be in the post by tomorrow.' Fred looked up dreamily, 'Weird Weasley murders an innocent – again.'

James sniggered again. 'Weird Weasley' had been the name that the paparazzi had recently given Victoire since she had become of age.

'Very funny – they've stopped calling me that anyway!' she hissed grumpily.

'Oh yeah, what is it now? Violent Victoire? Yeah – I forgot they've got you down for beating up that barmen in the leaky cauldron, apparently his still in St Mungo's after you – what was it?' he said thoughtfully. 'Oh yeah hexed him so hard that he was hurling bogies from out his ears for ten whole hours…' laughed Fred.

Fred definitely had Albus' Uncle George's humour. Their Uncle George had told them repeatedly of how Fred's namesake was just the same. Albus' father had said his Uncle George was never quite the same after his twin's death. They had only ever been told that deceased Uncle Fred was the joker of the family.

'I've warned you, Fred, if Theresa Bones so much as gets a lonely persons advertisement in the Quibbler again or Delilah Macmillan's sock draw contents flying around the fourth floor again, I'm going straight to McGonagall.'

'You knew about the lonely hearts posting in the Quibbler?' asked Fred. 'I thought that you didn't know why you kept getting those letters from the man in Saudi Arabia with the ten cats and the head the size of Al's left bum cheek…'

'That was your doing?!' she said.

'Ooops Sorry.' Snickered Fred and turned to eat his potatoes.

It appeared to Albus however, that he was not particularly sorry as he heard Fred quoting parts of the letters.

'Ooo I feel a certain connection with you, your single eyebrow is symbolic of your intelligence – ' Fred began.

'Your nose is slightly bent but it's better than the wart that I heard you had to get surgically removed by muggles –.' James carried on.

The whole table erupted into laughter and Victoire turned to her group of friends.

'Feels like home already, doesn't it, eh Rose?' Albus said.

'Sure does.' She sighed.

'Hey, what's getting you down?' He whispered to her sensing her sadness.

'Oh, Al, I wish they'd just leave us alone. We're normal children aren't we?'

'I know, Rosie, but we'll just have to put up with it. I'm here for you, I understand. Besides we'll be home before you know it.' Said Albus brightly.

'I suppose.' She muttered whilst being giving a vigorous handshake from a fellow Gryffindor first year.

'Pleasure to meet you Rose Weasley,' he was saying 'My father's always been ever so fond of your father, Auror when he was just seventeen he was saying and of course yours too, Albus Potter. And what about your mother, Hermione Weasley? World class that one, she's invented all sorts of healing potions. Inventor of the cure for Obliviating side effects. And you and that book series of yours published when you were just seven years old!'

'Uhm – yes.' Rose said nervously.

'I'm Samuel Goddard, by the way. A pleasure to meet you Rose.' Then the boy simply strolled back to his seat.

'Disgusting.' Said Albus.

'What?' asked Rose.

'He's got a thing for you that Samuel Goddard.' He replied.

Rose blushed and decided to ignore what Albus said and return to her pudding, picking out the raisins carefully.

It was then suddenly drawn to Albus' attention that Louis, the quietest of the three became very panicky.

'That's bloody –.' He stopped and turned pale.

'That was the trigger word you bloody idiot!' Fred blistered.

'Well, you've gone and said it again! It's going to be double now!' flustered Louis.

'What's going on?' Dominique edgily enquired. 'Or don't I want to know?'

'Don't be a twat, Louis!' said Fred. 'What the hell are we going to do, you idiotic git!'

'Get rid of it!' he urged.

'Calm it Ahmet.' Fred replied jokingly.

'No, Fred, this is not funny, we'll get into loads of trouble, do something!'

'Yeah and what?' I'll just nip down to the loos and flush it down the toilet?' Fred said sarcastically.

'It's your fault that it's going off anyway!' said James.

'Will someone please tell me, what's going on?' Dominique said again.

It looked as though Fred was about to reveal what he had hidden in his robe pocket but before it was fully in to view, a loud spark exploded into the great hall and the enchanted sky repelled it back down so that a slash of mist bounced across the walls with students in a fit of coughs.

'The Weasley's are traaaaaa-ble. The Weasley's are in traaaaaaaaaa-ble.' Peeves the poltergeist was chanting from somewhere.

'Fred! James! Louis! I'm going to kill you.' Victoire's voice travelled from somewhere in the fog. 'Weasley's Weather Whizzes are strictly forbidden!'

A/N – Review. Should I carry on?